SEX Unlimited The Complete Volumes (2 page)

My world has been turned upside down in an instant and I have no idea how I’ll ever get it right side up again. The pain I’m feeling right now is like none I’ve ever experienced before. I wonder if he even realizes the damage he has done. When I married him, I was entrusting my heart and life within his hands. Obviously that was a mistake. A mistake I won’t ever repeat again.

One year later …

TODAY IS THE DAY.

It’s been one year since James and I officially divorced, and the weight of failure is pressing down upon me like an anvil. Fifteen years of marriage and nothing to show for it. The day he left I felt as if I would never recover, but time is a funny thing. It’s as if each day is a thin layer of healing salve. Day after day the pain lessens but the scar never disappears completely.

He gave me the house, but I couldn’t stay there. That was where we made our life and where I dreamed dreams for our future. I couldn’t stand being there alone. It felt like a tomb holding the skeletons of our love. So I moved into this quaint little three bedroom Tudor house tucked back onto a small secluded lot and I love the privacy. I still catch myself reminiscing about my life with James, but I quickly push the memories away. I can’t think about the past if I ever want a happy future.

Pouring my third cup of coffee, I try to forget my failed marriage and focus on work. Work is all I have left these days. Thank goodness there’s more than enough of it to go around. The indie self-publishing market has blown up and editors have wait lists a mile long. My schedule is booked up for the next eight months straight without any breathing room. I like it that way though. It gives me zero time to wallow in self-pity. My phone buzzes to life and I see that it’s Dawn, my most demanding client. She just sent me her manuscript two days ago and she’s already calling. Rolling my eyes, I put some fake pep in my voice as I answer.

“Good morning, Dawn. What can I do for you?”

“Candace dear, I was just calling to see how the edits were going. I emailed you last night and hadn’t heard back from you yet so I thought I would give you a ring,” she says in her most annoying high pitched voice. This woman seriously drives me crazy but I put up with her because she’s one of my longest standing clients and she writes like a freight train. Last year alone she wrote seven full-length novels. Dawn pays the bills, so I put up with her constant badgering.

“Yes, Dawn I have your manuscript. I will start on it tonight. I should have it to you within the next seven to ten days if that works for you.”

“Hmmmmm, over a week. I was hoping for sooner, but it
is
longer than usual so I suppose I can wait it out.”

I grit my teeth incessantly and wish I could ask her if she has any idea how hard it is to edit a one hundred thousand plus words manuscript in under a week. It’s nearly impossible unless she wants a shoddy job done.

“Okay, I’m glad you’re flexible. I should probably get to it though.”

“All right, dear. I’ll give you a ring in a week. Ciao.”

I hang up the phone and open my laptop. Over a hundred new emails pop up and I scan through them, trying to decide what’s priority and what isn’t. Skimming through, I see an email from MatchYouUp.com and I almost want to laugh out loud. Do they know it’s my divorce anniversary or something? The subject line is ‘Are you ready to make that leap of faith again?’. I hover over the email with my cursor, ready to press delete, and then, for some reason, I open it.

What the hell? It’s not like I’m actually going to make a profile or anything. I’m just curious.

I’m instantly taken to the main website and smacked in the face with singles galore. Everyone seems to be looking for love, marriage and babies. Babies … now there is a subject I hate to even think about. The day I told James the doctor said children weren’t possible for me was the day I witnessed his love for me beginning to drain. Slowly but surely a wedge was formed between us and I was never able to fix it. He wanted children so badly and my body had let him down. Shaking the thought away, I bring my attention back to the screen. There are so many little icons of faces and names.

Meeting Mr. Right on a site like this seems silly and inconceivable to me. Not that I’m looking for that, because I’m not. It’s been a year since I felt the touch of a man or the embrace of strong arms, but a relationship is just not something I want at this juncture in my life. I’m thirty-six years old and I’m set in my ways. I like my life of solitude. Only thing is, I do think about sex. A lot. I’ve always been a very sexual woman, and I’ve always loved sex. James and I had a fantastic love life. Sex between us was never one of our problems. We did it well and we did it often.

I miss the sensation of a physical connection. Being touched, desired and having my body brought to heights of soaking wet lust. Almost instantaneously with my dirty thoughts, a pop-up ad comes across my screen. SexUnlimited.com My brows shoot up and my curiosity peeks. The tag line reads,
Have unlimited sex on your terms, no strings attached
. Now that sounds like a deal I could agree to—no drama, no expectations, just fun.

Or would that make me a slut?

Good grief, what am I thinking? I’m officially losing my mind today. The divorce memories have me really jacked up, that has to be it. The ad continues to flash as if taunting me.

Blink

Blink

Blink

I click it.

Damn, I’m a sucker.

I’M ON MY THIRD GLASS of red wine.

Staring at my SexUnlimited.com profile, I shake my head. Yeah, I did it. I created a stupid profile on this ridiculous matching site and now I’m deliberating over which photos to upload. Scrolling through a few pictures, I decide on a simple headshot to showcase my green eyes and long dark brown hair. Let’s see how many of these jerks care about a woman’s face. I seriously doubt I’ll get any interested parties without sexy photos.

This has to be rock bottom for me. Really. But something in the back of my mind says to hell with it. I’m a close to middle aged woman who lives alone and hasn’t had sex in a year. I’m a grown adult. Why is it that men can go screw the world without repercussions, yet I’m sitting here, shaming myself internally because I’m horny and acting on it? That’s bullshit.

I click upload and submit my profile for review. Now I guess I wait.

Deciding to knock out some work on Dawn’s manuscript, I open the file and get ready to plow through some edits. My initial scan through of the story and my attention is already piqued. Her manuscript is titled,
True
Loss Story
.

Loving someone is like the chaos of war. It's a battle you'll never win because the moment you fall in love, you've forever lost your mind.

The day I fell for Brian I most certainly lost my mind. I also lost my heart. He stole it and I happily let him. Before Brian, I’d never known such all-encompassing love. Finding him gave my life new meaning. Losing him wasn't something I was prepared for. Let me tell you a story about losing the love of my life and how I survived it.

My name is Danielle and this is my true loss story.

I scan down further through the document and the word
cock
catches my eye.

When we made love, it was always so much more than sex. Brian touched me with a reverence that exuded love and passion. Sex wasn't just physical with us. It was a full mind, body and soul experience.

The first time we made love I was overwhelmed by him; by his bold words. “Watch my cock, Danielle. I want you to watch me move inside you.”

He spoke softly, but every word demanded my full attention. I looked down and watched him penetrate me the first time our bodies were joined. It was truly the most erotic moment of my life. He moved inside of me but it was more than a physical pleasure. With every movement, Brian infiltrated not only my body, but my heart and soul.

Wow, this is new for Dawn. She’s not normally one to write the steamy stuff so descriptively. I’m accustomed to her sex scenes being more fade to black. She must be testing new writing waters with this one. Just that little scene made me feel a tad feverish. Internally I laugh at myself.

I really need to get laid.

A dinging sound brings me out of a deep sleep. I fell asleep at my desk yet again. I adjust my eyes to see what time it is—three in the morning. Well, I made my way through a huge chunk of Dawn’s manuscript; that’s a plus to the late night. The dinging sound rings out again and I see the tab blinking from that website. Clicking on it, I’m shocked to see that I have several ‘nods’ which I’m guessing is the equivalent to the ‘poking’ feature on Facebook. Not only that, but I have an inbox message as well. My brows rise in surprise and I click it.

Dear Candace,

I’m sure you’re getting flooded with messages, but I wanted to attempt to stand out among the rest and just get right to the point. I won’t attempt to woo you in a message. I won’t try to impress you with boastful words. If you're on this site for mind-blowing sex, and a lot of it, then I would venture to say that trying to impress you with well worded niceties is of no value. Instead, I’ll tell you what I’m looking for and if you're looking for something similar then I look forward to your reply.

I like to fuck. Hard. I like to fuck slowly. I also enjoy making love. I like to be pleasured. I love to give pleasure. I like to laugh. I like to make others laugh. I love the female body and testing its limits. I love a lover who will explore new things without shame or embarrassment. I want to make a woman come so hard and in so many ways that her body designs its own special language just for mine.

I hope to possibly learn what you like, too.

Regards,

Brisban C.

Wow.

I read and reread the message over and over. Is this guy for real? I feel a little flushed and a lot nervous. I click on his profile and immediately my eyes focus on a defined chiseled jawline and the most intense blue eyes I’ve ever seen. Then there are his lips. My god … the sexiest lips I’ve ever seen. His dark hair is cut short and he looks like a damn model. He does have a few lines here and there showing his age, so I scan his profile. I learn he’s forty-one years old and likes to play golf. His favorite food is Japanese and his favorite movie is Pulp Fiction.