Self Preservation (19 page)

“As ludicrous as I think this beastly commitment scam everyone seems so gleefully happy about,” Alex continued, “I do know that Tadd believes in it with his whole heart. I've known him since freshman year at university, and in all those years, he hasn't changed much. He's as disturbingly optimistic and as tediously boring as ever.”

Tadd laughed as Alex peeked down, giving him a wink. “But, as easy as it is to loathe the man for being so utterly respectable, it is with equal ease that one can love him.”

Alex let his gaze fall to the table for a moment as he lifted his glass and added, “Despite the fact you've always felt like that perfect older brother that I'm endlessly trying to live up to…I do wish you all the happiness the world has to offer. I know of no one who deserves it more.”

Alex took a drink as everyone clapped. There are a few
ahs
from around the room as Tadd and Jack kissed and waved thank you to Alex.

“Though somewhat unorthodox…we are homosexuals, you know,” Alex said, widening his eyes as if he'd just said something truly shocking. “With that delightful spirit in mind, Jack's ex, Davis, would like to say a few words.”

Alex glimpsed down to see Davis frozen, eyes wide. He reached down and yanked Davis up out of his seat. “I'm desperately hoping it will be something deliciously catty.”

Davis threw on a plastered smile as Alex shoved the microphone into his hand and sat down, leaving Davis alone in the glare of everyone's gaze.

Davis shooed Alex's hand away as he tried to pat Davis on the ass. “Um, hi… I really didn't have anything prepared…which is actually very unlike me.” He glanced down at Deseree for help and she shrugged her shoulders.

“I guess I've actually been a little scattered as of late. I suppose that's what happens when your first love finds and marries his true love.” He smiled at the couple. “Of course, we all weren't given a lot of notice…which is the excuse I'm going to use for not getting you a gift, by the way. It's just as well, Tadd, because after seeing your condo, you so would have hated anything I might have brought you.”

Davis shoved his hand in his pocket as several people laughed. “Jack is a really great guy.” Davis looked back at Tadd. He pinched his leg to keep himself from welling up with tears. “And along with him you also inherit Candace, who is truly the most beautiful and special woman I have ever had the honor of knowing. Take it from me, Tadd, this is a really great family to be a part of, and I know they will welcome you with the same open arms and unconditional love that was so graciously provided to me. And Jack…I do hope with all my heart you finally have all the happiness you deserve. Aside from being one of the grooms, you are also, truly, the best man. To the happy couple.”

Applause broke out as Davis tipped his glass, finishing off his champagne. Jack smiled as Tadd reached over and wiped a tear off his cheek. Candace wiped her eyes as she turned, looking over at Jack. Davis sat down and Deseree grabbed his hand. He shrugged as Alex leaned over and planted a soft kiss on his cheek. Davis turned to look at him and Alex whispered in all earnestness, “Jolly well done.”

“Why did you do that to me?” Davis whispered, getting up from the table. He smiled at Jack and Tadd, saying, “Excuse me.”

Alex sighed at Deseree as Davis walked away. She began to get up and Alex offered, “No. I'll go.”

Deseree sighed but turned her attention back to her plate. She shoved another coconut-encrusted shrimp into her mouth, chewing and smiling contentedly. She looked up and stopped chewing as she noticed a man at the next table watching her with a smile on his face. He was a stunningly beautiful Latin man with coal black hair, bronze skin, and large brown eyes. He got up and sat in the chair next to her.

“I never realized fashion designers ate like that,” he said with a slight Spanish accent.

She grinned, loving the fact he knew who she was and praying that didn't mean he was gay. “Really? Well, maybe if you spent more time around us, you wouldn't find that to be so odd.”

“I'm a fashion photographer,” he said, with a wink. “I've spent a lot of time around designers.”

“I guess you haven't been around the right ones then,” she said, snarfing down another shrimp.

He offered his hand to her. “I'm Nicolás. I wasn't trying to offend. I like a girl with a healthy appetite.”

“Then you'll really love me,” she said through a mouthful of food as they shook hands.

Nicolás pulled his hand back and looked at her. He leaned his elbow on the table and rested his chin on his hand, smiling. “I just might.”

She beamed.
I love you, universe!

“Davis, please,” Alex said as he reached out and grabbed Davis by the arm.

Davis took a deep breath and turned around. “You know, I realize you think I'm a fool, but do you really dislike me that much?”

Alex took him by both arms and looked into his eyes. “I don't think you're a fool, Davis. Quite the contrary, I rather fancy you…which is why I did that to you.”

“That makes no sense,” Davis said, trying unsuccessfully to pull away. “I swear you drive me completely insane, Alex. Half the time, I wanna hug you, and the other half, I wanna shank you.”

“Davis,” Alex said, letting out a little laugh. “I realize I don't know you, but…I believe you to be the type of man who would always have regrets had you not had the opportunity to say what you did…to make amends. I realize it was difficult, but perhaps it was something you needed to do.”

Davis peered up at him and sighed. It sounded almost concessionary. Perhaps Alex had a point.

“At the end of the day, you said good-bye and wished them both well. A year from now, that's what they'll remember.”

Alex dropped his arms, letting Davis go. Davis smacked him in the stomach with the back of his hand.

“Ouch,” Alex said, rubbing his stomach. “Why are you
so
violent?”

Davis grinned. “Wouldn't you like to know?”

“Yes, actually,” Alex said with a grimace. “I think I might.”

“Regardless, you asked for it.”

“I most certainly did no such thing,” Alex said, grabbing his hand. “Come on, you little deviant.”

Alex led Davis out onto the dance floor, taking him into his arms. Davis laid his cheek on Alex's chest and wrapped his arms around his waist as they slow danced to the orchestra. Davis could feel Alex rest his chin on top of his head. Davis relaxed into him and hoped Alex was right. Maybe that would be what they remembered. He frowned, wishing he could say the same. As Alex slowly led Davis around the floor, he smiled a little. At least he knew Jack would be happy, and that made him happy.

He saw Deseree dancing with the handsome man from the table next to theirs. A large smile spread across his face.

“What are you smiling at?”

“How the hell did you know I was smiling?” Davis asked, able to still feel Alex's chin on the top of his head.

“I just could,” Alex answered with a grin. “Now out with it.”

“I was just watching Deseree dance, thankful she wasn't crouched in a corner somewhere shoveling food in her face.”

Davis felt the rumbling in Alex's chest as he laughed.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“If you must,” Alex said teasingly.

“That night in the club, did you know who I was?”

Alex held Davis tighter as if afraid Davis might run away.

“I knew you were Jack's ex,” Alex said, moving them slowly over the dance floor, “but I didn't know who you are.”

Oh, he's good, Davis thought.

“Thank you for coming, monkey face,” Jack said, squeezing Davis.

Tadd was standing behind Jack, and Davis winked at him.

“I told him to stop calling me that,” Davis said as Jack pulled away. “It's disrespectful.”

“I think I can handle it,” Tadd said, hugging Davis as Deseree hugged Jack. “And thank you for coming.”

“You sure about that?” Davis asked as they separated.

“Most definitely,” Tadd said, looking at Davis and squeezing his shoulder. “Somehow knowing we have our own little secrets Jack knows nothing about makes me feel closer to you.”

“Kinda sick, huh?” Davis asked, grinning.

“Yes, actually, and thank you for that speech earlier as well. I know Jack feels better after hearing it.”

“Well, you should probably thank that fellow over there for that,” Davis said, looking at Alex. “That wasn't really ever part of the plan.”

Tadd looked at Alex. “He is actually a good guy. A bit of a scamp, but underneath all the bravado… Let's just say if there was anyone he ever really cared for, they'd be very lucky.”

Davis smacked Tadd in the arm. “Will you stop it? Quit having those group vacation fantasies already.”

“You ready?” Jack asked.

Tadd nodded and looked back at Davis. “I never thought I'd ever hear myself say this, but we'll call you the instant we get back.”

Davis winked as Deseree and Alex walked up beside him. “I'll actually pick up the phone if you promise to keep all the details to yourselves.”

“That goes double for me,” Alex said, nodding.

Candace walked up behind them. “I expect all the details.”

“Me too,” Deseree said with a grin. “Gimme the good stuff.”

Jack and Tadd laughed as they stepped into the elevator and the doors slid shut.

“Are you sure you two can't stay another night?” Candace asked.

“I can't, gorgeous,” Davis answered, giving her a hug. “I've been gone for almost a week and I have a ton to do when I get back. I'll visit in a few weeks, though…if you'll have me.”

“When…what time…? I want a date.”

Davis kissed her on the cheek. “I'll call you on Monday. We'll pick a time then.”

“Fair enough,” Candace said. “And you, young lady… I'm taking you up on that shopping trip.”

“Anytime, anywhere,” Deseree said, hugging Candace. “Thank you for having me.”

“You're always welcome,” Candace said, pulling away.

Alex stared at Davis, then glanced over to Deseree. She nudged her head toward Davis.

Alex pulled out his wallet and extracted a business card. He handed it to Davis. “Give us a bell?”

Davis took the card and glanced at it before shoving it in his pocket. “Of course… I still owe you a hundred bucks.”

Alex's smile faded a bit as Davis turned and went over to the elevator.

Deseree shook her head as the doors opened and Davis walked in. She glared at Alex, who just stood there. Then, suddenly, she spun on her heel and launched herself into the elevator with Davis. She gave Davis a half smile and watched as the doors closed. She let out a sigh and frowned.

* * *

Deseree and Davis stood outside her gate at the airport. He reached up and ran the back of his hand over her cheek.

“I'm really glad I came.”

“Me too,” Davis said. “Though I can't for the life of me imagine why.”

“'Cause you've missed spending time with me, you twit.”

“That much is true.”

Deseree let out a frustrated sigh. “I wish you were coming back with me.”

“I have to go home,” Davis said as Deseree scowled at him. “I need a few days to figure some things out, but maybe after I put some things in order, I'll come stay with you for a while?”

“Really?” Deseree squealed as they made a final call for her flight. She threw her arms around him, knocking him back a bit as he began laughing. “Davis, that would be so great. I could really use having you around right now.”

“I told you I wouldn't let you go through this alone.”

“I know,” she said wide-eyed and pulling away, “but I figured you'd be too busy wallowing in your own self-pity to actually do it.”

“Nice,” Davis said, shaking his head at her.

“Ma'am,” the gate attendant said, looking at Deseree, “if you're planning on taking this flight you need to board now.”

Deseree hugged Davis one last time. She pulled away and turned around, handing the lady her ticket. She turned back and waved. “You actually proved me wrong…be satisfied with that.”

Davis laughed as she disappeared down the corridor. Davis let out a big sigh as he began to make his way through the airport to go wait at his own gate. As he weaved in and out of the knots of people and luggage, his chest began to ache. Even though his head understood that everything was as it should be, his heart still hadn't seemed to receive the memo. It was hard to say good-bye to a life he'd always thought he could get back… To the life he'd never really accepted he'd lost such a long time ago. He felt a tear start to run down his cheek as he came upon his gate. He looked up to see Alex leaning against a row of chairs. He smiled, a little surprised by how good it felt to see him there. Davis went up to him and he stood up, glancing down at Davis.

“A little songbird told me you might have a couple of hours before your flight boards,” Alex said, placing a hand on Davis's shoulder. “Let's get you pissed.”

Davis scanned his face for a moment as Alex reached up with his other hand and wiped the tear off his cheek with his finger.

“I don't wanna be pissed anymore, Alex.”

Alex laughed as he placed his arm around Davis's shoulder. “I meant get you drunk.”

“Oh,” Davis said, crinkling up his forehead and smiling. “Okay.”

“You know,” Alex said as they turned and began to slowly walk through the airport. “I was remembering just the other day how much I've always wanted to visit… Where is it you live?”

“Springfield?”

Alex began nodding his head with a smile. “Springfield, yes, that's it.”

“Really?” Davis asked, turning his head to look up at him.

“Though I'm not sure what made me think of it.”

“It's kinda bad timing, though,” Davis said as they continued to walk together.

“Of course,” Alex said, nodding his head. “Right…stupid of me…so sorry.”

“Mostly 'cause I'll probably be in New York,” Davis said with a half smile.

Alex stopped and peeked over at Davis. “Did I say Springfield? I am a daft prick. I meant New York. Who doesn't want to visit New York?”

“I figured that's what you meant,” Davis said, smiling as they began walking again.

“If it makes you feel any better,” Alex said, cocking his head to one side, “Tadd has a really small penis.”

Davis gazed up at him as they walked along together. He turned back, facing forward as the corners of his mouth turned up. “It does, actually…thanks.”

Alex laughed and squeezed Davis's shoulder, pulling him closer. They walked slowly down the corridor, and Davis rested his head against Alex's shoulder and let out a sigh.