Seduced By My Doms BN (19 page)

It had been magic, at least for me, and knowing James felt
the same took some of the wind out of my sails. Still, the thought of him
sharing even an ounce of that magic with Destiny sliced deep. While a cyclone
of emotions swirled inside me, I couldn’t stop staring at the apology in his
eyes or the bow of his sensual mouth. Though James had crushed me, I still
longed to lean in and kiss him. God, I was a sicker fuck than he was.

He released my hair as sadness filled his dark eyes. “I’m
sorry I hurt your feelings,” he softly whispered. “I know you think I’m some
kind of man-whore, but I’m not. This thing with Ian and Destiny—”

“It doesn’t matter what I think, James.” I interrupted. I
didn’t want to hear the intimate details of what he and Ian did to the girl. It
would only hurt more.

“It does to me, sweetheart.” He pressed his lips to my
forehead and I quivered.

I prayed he didn’t kiss my lips, for fear he’d rip away my
already crumbling determination. But at the same time, I ached for him to slide
his tongue inside my mouth and let me drown on his sweet passion, one last
time.

“Will you come back inside with me, so we can talk this
out?”

I shook my head and inched backward, clawing to put up a
barrier around me. “There’s nothing to discuss.”

“Actually there’s a whole lot to discuss,” he insisted. “But
not right now. You’re upset and hurt. I don’t want you calling a cab. Come on,
let me drive you home.”

“No. I won’t intrude on your evening. I’ll be fine with a
cab.”

A breeze ruffled my hair, and I shivered. Hugging myself to
ward off the cold, I realized that I was far colder on the inside than out.
Glancing over James’ shoulder, I watched a car pull into his driveway.

“Your pizza’s here. The money for it is inside by the door.
I dropped it when Ian…”

“Liz,” James placed a finger beneath my chin, drawing my
gaze back to him. That tiny bit of warmth plowed through me like a blast
furnace. So did the anguish in his eyes. “Come back inside. Dinner’s ready.”

I ached to trace my fingers over his mouth as it twitched in
a weak smile. “Fine. I’ll wait for my cab but I’m not eating.”

With a nod, James cautiously wrapped his arm around my waist
and pulled me tight against his side. Greedily drinking in the warmth of his
body, I begrudgingly allowed him to lead me back toward the house.

The pizza dude stood in the driveway, handing over a
cardboard box as James handed another twenty to the kid. Juggling the pizza in
one hand, James still held me close as we walked inside. Ian sat sprawled out
on the couch. One arm was slung over his eyes, his other hand held a bag of
frozen peas to his crotch. I bit my lips together to keep from laughing. James
looked at Ian and shook his head.

“Are you hungry, boss?” James asked as he quickly sobered.

“Not yet,” Ian groaned. “I’m still trying to decide if I’m
going to throw up or not.”

“I’m sorry,” I whispered softly.

Ian lifted his arm and peered at me with one eye. “Are you a
professional soccer player on the side, little one?” he asked dryly.

“Um, no.”

“You should be,” he grumbled then draped his arm back over
his eyes.

“Did you call…um?” James asked cryptically.

“Destiny,” I finished for him with a brittle smile.

“Yep. It’s all good,” Ian replied.

Reaching into my purse, I dug out my cell phone. “You didn’t
need to cancel on my account. I’ll be out of your hair as soon as I can.”

James set the box on the coffee table and stared at me. “I’d
like you to stay. I’d also like it if you’d stop shutting me out until we’ve
had a chance to talk this through.”

Striving to keep his imploring expression from affecting me,
I quickly weighed my options. I could tell him to shove it up his ass and go
home… To what? An empty house, a glass of wine, and a book? Or I could stay,
hear him out, then decide if I wanted to chuck it all and resume my boring,
predictable life. With a heavy sigh, I dropped my cell back in my purse.

“Then you’ll stay?” he asked as a flicker of hope darted
across his eyes.

I issued a curt nod. James convinced me to eat a slice of
pizza and long minutes passed while the three of us sat on the couch, talking
and eating. I didn’t say much as I ate slowly, opting instead to let James and
Ian take command of the lighthearted conversation. Even after the pizza was
gone, my stomach still swirled. Ian suddenly shifted and placed his hand on my
thigh. There was a palpable change in the air, and I tensed.

“I owe you an apology for the way I hit on you earlier,” Ian
began with a grim expression. “I had no right to assume you were Destiny’s
friend. We’d talked about her bringing someone with her, and I erroneously
assumed you were her.”

“I don’t need to hear this, really.” I held up a hand. “I’m
sorry I kicked you in the nuts.”

“Yeah, me too,” he chuckled.

“But you do need to hear about Destiny.” James cleared his
throat. Apprehension lined his face. “Our arrangement with her isn’t what you
think. It is, but it isn’t.”

Jealousy seeped through me once more as James stumbled all
over his words.

“Christ, man. Spit it out.” Ian shook his head as he rolled
his eyes.

“Give me a fucking minute,” James barked before his
expression softened. “Remember when I told you that I decided to pursue the Dom
side of life?”

“Yes.”

“My old play partner was a switch as well, but she wasn’t
ever my sub, she simply bottomed for me. I’d never had a full-time sub before,
so Ian approached Destiny and…” James stopped. Seemingly frustrated, he heaved
out a heavy sigh. “She’s not my sub either. She’s—”

“What James is trying to say, not so eloquently, I might
add,” Ian interrupted with a scowl. “Is that I’m here to help mentor James in
the ways of Dominance. Not that he needs much help; he’s a damn good Dom.
Destiny is an unowned sub who graciously offered to be our…well, for lack of a
better term, our test subbie.”

I bet she did. No doubt having you two tag-team her in
bed was more than enough incentive.

“And of course her compensation for helping is to be the
peanut butter sandwiched between you two at the end of each lesson, right?”

“Yeah.” James nodded sheepishly.

“Clever girl,” I stated dryly. “You know you both are being
played, right?”

A slow, surprised smile slid over Ian’s mouth. “What makes
you say that?”

“If she were truly submissive, wouldn’t she offer to help
without any strings attached? Not that I blame her for getting the best of both
words,” I added, steeling an appreciative glance at both handsome men. “If I
understand submission—which I probably don’t—the sub’s needs are met by serving
the Dom. Sounds like she’s using the guise of helping in order to get what she
wants; the two of you grunting and grinding on her.”

“That little… She’s topping from the bottom,” James blurted
to Ian.

“Fuck yeah, she is,” Ian snorted.

“And you’ve known it all along, haven’t you?”

“Of course I did it,” Ian snorted. “She’s damn fun to fuck.”

Oh I bet she is
. An image of the stunning blonde
from the waiting room popped into my head. Fucking her wouldn’t be a hardship
on any man. I couldn’t compete with the likes of
her
, not in a million
lifetimes. It was time for me to leave. To home to down a bottle of wine.

“Jesus, man,” James barked with a furious scowl. “Why didn’t
you tell me that to begin with? Dammit, Ian, do you always think with your
dick?”

Ian shrugged. “Not always, but it’s been known to happen
from time to time.”

“Wow,” I murmured.

“What?” Ian asked defensively.

“You call yourself a mentor with that attitude? You don’t
even take the lifestyle seriously.”

Ian’s demeanor changed on a dime. The teasing sparkle
evaporated from his dark eyes and the smart-assed smile fell from his face.

“I take it more seriously than you imagine. What do you know
about the lifestyle?”

“Nothing.” I raised my hand in surrender. “I just thought
that…well, at first I thought that
Doms
were a bunch
of bossy, spoiled men who manipulated women to get their way. But thanks to
James, I know that’s not the case…
erm
, not
always
the case. With you I’m not so sure.”

“No,
getting our way
is the wrong motivation for a
Dom—well, for a good Dom at least.” Ian frowned. “Don’t get me wrong, having a
submissive eager and willing to please is a treasure; one to be honored and
celebrated. But if you think being a Dom or a sub is easy, you ought to try
submitting sometime before you start passing judgment.” Ian cocked his head and
studied me intently. “Why don’t you try submitting to James and me, little
one?”

“I have submitted. At least I think I have.” When I darted a
nervous glance toward James, he nodded and smiled proudly.

“Yes. She has. It was amazing.” James preened. Satisfaction
lined his face.

“Then let’s start.” Ian clapped his hands together, leering
at me with a wolfish grin. “Stand up and strip for us, little one.”

My heart lurched, thundering so hard I thought it was going
to pound out of my chest and land on the damn floor. “What?” I squeaked. “Me?
You’re on crack, mister.”

“Wait, Ian. She’s not ready for—”

Ian raised a hand to James, cutting him off as he pinned me
with an angry glare. “I’m not on crack, little one. And yes, I am talking about
you. You’re the only sub in the room.”

“But… I’m not a sub,” I protested, on a soft quiver.

Ian jerked a quizzical expression toward James. The man who
had sent me to heaven with the vampire glove nodded affirmatively to his mentor
before a proud but somewhat sympathetic smile tugged his lips.

“Ah.” Ian issued a knowing nod. “You’ve submitted, but don’t
think you’re a sub. No worries. We’ll teach you.”

Reaching down, Ian threaded his fingers through mine. If
he’d intended the gesture to soothe, it didn’t. Anxiety soared. But when he
swept his thumb over the inside of my wrist, my hormones roared to life,
throbbing with an eager sensation that nearly wiped away my angst. With Ian’s
arousal came a blast of guilt. I couldn’t even look James in the eye for fear
he’d read the riot of desires waging war inside me and be crushed or at least
jealous.

Snatching my hand from Ian’s, I bolted off the couch.
Snagging the empty beer bottles and pizza box off the coffee table, I raced to
the kitchen.

Tossing the items into the trash, my hands trembled. Why
hadn’t I left when I had the chance? I was livid that Ian—the egotistical
prick—seemed as if he expected me to spread my legs and take Destiny’s place
without a second thought.

“That’s ludicrous,” I mumbled aloud, my face burning as if I
had a fever of a hundred and six. “You can’t possibly take the place of another
sub.”

“Why not?” James asked.

Jolting, I squealed in surprise. Leaning against the wall
with his arms crossed over his chest, James studied me with a sharp stare.

“Because… I… I—.” Stammering, I opened and closed my mouth
like a fish out of water. Grappling for an excuse, my brain wouldn’t cooperate.
I couldn’t come up with a single, tangible reason. The only conscious thought
careening through my head was imagining how it would feel to be meshed between
their hot, naked bodies.

“Because you’re what? Afraid?” James asked.

Terrified
. “No,” I lied.

“I thought you were done lying to me, Liz,” James admonished
with an unhappy expression. “All I’ve ever asked is that you tell me the truth.
I know you’re afraid, but Ian and I will—”

“No,” I barked. “I can’t.”

James stared at me for several long minutes. The
disappointment lining his face landed on me like a physical blow. Guilt that
I’d done that to him made me cast my eyes toward the floor.

“It’s probably for the best,” he mumbled.

“Why do you say that?” I challenged, snapping my head back
up.

Why are you arguing with him? Of course it’s for the
best. Shut the hell up!

“Because you can’t be honest with me.” James shrugged. “If
you can’t extend me that one courtesy, there’s no point in a Dom/sub
relationship with you.”

“Because I won’t vomit up every emotion makes me a liar?” I
thrust out my chin defiantly.

“No.” James pushed off the wall, eating up the distance
between us in three long strides. “I’m saying you’re not ready. Or rather not
willing to open yourself up, vulnerabilities and all, with me.”

Reaching out, he caressed a finger down my cheek. Excitement
hurdled through me as he cupped my face.

“I’d truly hoped by giving you a taste of submission, you’d
hunger for more.”

He knew I did. It was pointless to deny the fact that James
had awakened something incredible and powerful.

“But I do want more,” I softly confessed.

A melancholy smile pulled the corners of his mouth. “Yet you
question whether you’re ready or not, right?”

“Yes, I do.”

“What do you need from us to feel more secure?” Ian asked,
rounding the corner.

The intimidating, gorgeous bastard had been eavesdropping.

Not making me feel like a substitute sub for Destiny
would be a good start.

“I have no idea.” Which was all the truth I was willing to
extend to Ian.

“Let’s discuss it then,” he suggested. “But before we start,
would you grab me another beer?”

Yanking the refrigerator door open, I gripped the
brown-necked bottled and twisted off the cap before thrusting it toward Ian.

“Thank you.” He took a long pull, then wiped his wet lips on
the back of his hand. I fought the urge to grasp his fingers and lick the
moisture from his skin. Turning to James, Ian issued a curt nod. “You’re right.
She is a submissive. She’s just scared.”

“You don’t know anything about me, Ian,” I hissed at the
pompous prick before planting my fists on my hips.

He simply smiled and held up his beer. “You may not think
you’re a sub, but you are.”

“I’m a sub because I got you a beer?”

“No. You’re a sub because you didn’t tell me to get it my
own damn self.” Ian smirked.

“That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.”

“You need more proof?” Ian taunted with an arch of his dark
brow.

“A hell of a lot more. But not from you,” I scoffed.

“Then how about me?” James offered. “Provided you tell me
the truth from here on out.”

I wanted to jump at his offer, but fear won over desire.
“You two should stick with Destiny.”

As the words tumbled off my tongue, a bitter stab of
jealously pricked deep. My stupid fears had me in a strangle hold and wouldn’t
let up. Even the look of disappointment stamped on James’ face couldn’t save me
from the trepidation rising inside me.

“No,” Ian replied. Moving in close, the intoxicating scent
of sandalwood and cinnamon filled my senses. So did his alluring body heat.
“Don’t get me wrong, Destiny is a good sub, but she doesn’t challenge me. At
least not like you do, little one. You’re sassy and headstrong and I must say,
you pique my interest and a whole lot more.”

As Ian’s slow sensual words spilled over me, the kitchen
seemed to grow smaller, airless, and still. A shiver of fear mixed with need
slid down my spine.

“I think I should call a cab now,” I whispered.

Ian shook his head disapprovingly as he stepped back. “If
that’s what you want. Go ahead. We’re sure as hell not going to force you,
Liz.”

“No, we’re not.” James echoed, grimly. “But I still don’t
want you calling a fucking cab. I’ll drive you home. Let’s go.”

I bit back the urge to tell him not to bother, but I’d
pissed James off enough for one night. Ian said goodbye as James walked me to his
truck. The ride home was unnervingly quiet, prickly and awkward. I stole
several sideway glances at James. His stoic expression only served to remind
how I’d been unable—or as he’d so accurately nailed it: unwilling—to consider
his invitation.

I’d been a fool to accept James’ date, especially knowing he
craved the kinkier side of life. But if I’d said no, I would have missed out on
the best sex of my life, the incredible spanking, and the erotic sensations of
the vampire glove. Simply thinking about the soft fur and sharp spikes made my
nipples grow hard.

Pulling into my driveway, James shoved the truck into park
and turned off the motor. Ready to escape to the safety of my own four walls, I
gripped the door handle. But before I could bolt from the truck, James reached
out and wrapped a strong, capable hand around my arm.

“I’m sorry we overwhelmed you. Regardless of what you think,
Ian’s a good Dom. He just has a tendency to push too hard. But there’s a reason
for it. He and I both know you have stunning untapped potential.”

I was flattered by James’ words, but I still didn’t feel
like a sub. I only felt depressed that I’d let him down. Ian’s visit had been a
blessing of sorts. His ‘push’ forced me to open my eyes, to reevaluate my own
naïve and incredibly stupid assumption that I could fulfill James’ needs. It
was best to end the whole disaster before I gave in and lost my heart to the
man.