Secret Desires (6 page)

Natalie woke to the sound of James snoring softly by her side. Early morning light streamed in through the curtains and illuminated his honey colored hair against the soft cream-colored bed sheets. She barely remembered him coming over, just that she had passed out almost immediately upon returning home from work and that he had let himself into her apartment. He woke her for dinner then held her in his arms until she fell back into a deep sleep. It was the first time she'd actually spent the night with him without having made love; apart from their brief dalliance in his office earlier in the day, of course.

She felt like herself again. The drama with Ivy was nothing but a distant memory that had no place of importance at home. The only thing that mattered at that moment was the gorgeous man lying - she peaked underneath the covers - naked and asleep next to her.

A thick patch of stubble had grown across the expanse of his chiseled jawline over the course of the night that made him even more frustratingly handsome. He looked so young and carefree there in her bed, more like a boyfriend than a wealthy businessman with hotels and clubs across the country. Absent of the every day stresses of work, divorce, and the questionable standing of their own relationship, James looked so peaceful, like there was nothing at all wrong in his world.

They hadn't spent much of any one morning together except for the occasional weekend, and she wondered what it would be like if they had nowhere to be for the day. They could sleep in or go out for breakfast, catch a movie or an exhibit at a museum. They wouldn’t have to go anywhere near a Fitson-owned hotel or club or to the Brighton offices. They could just be normal.

She reached out and touched her fingers to his head, softly pushing through unruly locks of hair. She sat up on her side, balancing her weight on elbow and hip, and let her fingers graze down his cheek, across his jaw and down the line of his neck to the smattering of hair at his chest.

He rustled at her touch. She let her fingertips travel down further until they reached the line of hair that began at his navel and swept down towards his groin beneath the bed sheet.

"Don't start something you can't finish, Miss Harlow," he startled her, his voice still deepened with sleep.

"I'm not
starting
," she said in mock defense. "I'm appreciating."

"Uh huh. Come here, you." He tugged at her shirt until she fell flush against him. She nestled her cheek in the nook of his shoulder and luxuriated in his scent, inhaling him deeply.

"If we didn't have anywhere to be this morning what would we do?"

"What do you mean?" he asked, eyes still closed.

"I mean, if you didn't have to go into Fitson and I didn't have to go into Brighton. If we could just spend the morning together doing whatever we wanted, what would we do?"

He turned lazily until their bodies were facing and finally opened his eyes, the blue-green almost blinding in the morning light. "We would do whatever you wanted to do."

"Really?"

He closed his eyes again and nuzzled his nose against her cheek. "Mmm-hmm."

"Say I wanted to go shoe shopping."

"I would get on my knees and personally put your foot in every shoe you wanted to try on." He kissed her tenderly on the tip of her nose, and then gently brushed his own nose against it.

"That's kind of creepy, but sweet, I guess," she laughed. "What about if we did whatever you wanted to do?"

"What I want to do is be with you." He kissed her in the hollow of her neck and let his hand roam at her hip, his fingertips grazing just beneath the cottony fabric of her pajamas to the naked skin beneath.

Natalie parted her lips to take in a breath of air. "You better be careful, or I'm going to start thinking you're really a romantic at heart." James lifted his head from the crook of her neck and thoughtfully ran his tongue across his bottom lip. She continued, "The very first night we met you said you'd dispel me of the notion that you're a nice guy. Looks like I was right about you after all."

"Is that right?"

She grazed her index finger across his wet lip. "Don't worry. I'll keep your secret safe."

He took possession of her finger and held it in place. "You want to know what I would do?" he whispered, his voice low and deep.

Natalie's heartbeat quickened, echoing in her throat. "What?" Before she could take her next breath James turned her on her back and kneeled in between her legs.

"Take off your clothes," he commanded.

Blood pumped through her body as her heart raced with sudden excitement. She lifted her hips to smooth her pajama shorts and panties off her body, and felt his thighs angle at the base of her bottom so her legs were straddled in the air. He hastily removed the articles of clothing and tossed them to his side. His erection grazed against her exposed sex, teasing her.

"And the rest," he ordered.

She removed her top as quickly as she could, then reached out to touch his chest only to have her hands captured by his. Caught off guard she tried tugging away from him, but his grasp was too tight.

"Touch yourself."

Natalie panted to catch her breath, but the quick and steady vibrations of her heart from within her chest made normal breathing impossible. She was too excited, too turned on to even try. He let go and she tentatively placed her palms over her breasts, feeling the delicate peaks of her erect nipples brush against her skin. James set his hands on either side of her arms and watched her, his chest mere inches from the tops of her hands. She squeezed the muscles between her legs together for just the slightest bit of friction. She could feel him - wanted to feel more of him.

"James," she whispered.

"What?"

"I-" she breathed. She didn't know what to say, but felt she would say anything to convince him to end his teasing.

"You what?" He angled his hips and used a hand to guide himself just far enough inside her to illicit a moan. "Open your eyes, Natalie," he ordered her, and she struggled to oblige. "You
what
?" he repeated.

"Nothing. I just want you."

She gasped when he filled her entirely, the openness of her thighs against his hips deepening him inside of her. The weight of each thrust pushed her legs into her chest, and she cried out at the sensation of him. It wasn't enough. It was never enough. Her muscles tightened and released around him with every push of his hips. He grabbed her shoulders and used the leverage to bury himself inside her to the point of near pain. Each thrust was near-blinding in exquisite intensity.

She was ready to combust, to come in such delirium that she would surely pass out. But when she was just barely close enough James slowed his pace and maneuvered until his torso was hovering just enough above hers so that she could feel her breasts slide against beads of sweat on his chest. She wrapped her legs around him and crossed her ankles, holding tight to him.

He kissed her fervently, his lips embracing hers without discrimination. The urgent manner in which he tasted of her mouth was met in pace and intensity by his thrusts, and there was only a moment to enjoy the total immersion of her body into his before she was coming wildly around him, using the leverage of her heels pressed into his back to smash her hips flush against his. She craned her head backwards and quickly covered her face with a pillow to silence the howls that came unbidden from within her. James' lips were at her throat as he came, groaning so loudly she could feel the vibrations against her own vocal cords. Even when he stopped moving she could feel him pulsating inside of her in response to her own overly-sensitized muscles.

Natalie relaxed beneath him and lazily reached up to brush a lock of hair from off his forehead. Her fingers dampened with his sweat. He looked deep into her eyes, his mouth open and panting as he tried to catch his breath. Something inside her shifted as she gazed back. Perhaps it was the still-closeness of their warm bodies against one another, or the thrilling high of beautiful chemicals that surged through her post-coitus mind. She felt all at once vulnerable to him and protected by him, that even though she was naked and beyond exposed to him she was safe. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally.

The sound of her ringing cell phone brought her clearly back into reality as though she were only just waking up. James wordlessly untangled their bodies and got up so she could grab the phone just before it went to voicemail.

"Shane," she greeted her assistant after a quick glance at the screen. "What's up?" She watched from the corner of her eye as James slipped on his boxer briefs and jeans from the previous evening.

"Hey boss. Do you already have coffee at the office? Because I can make a run to Starbucks if you need?"

Shit
. Natalie took a quick glance at the screen to note the time and instantly regretted it. When she looked up again James was gone from the bedroom. "Uh yes, please. I'll be in shortly."

"Wait, you're not there already?"

"No, not yet," she said as she scrambled to get up from the bed, ignoring the fact that she was talking to her assistant while completely naked. "I'll be there soon. Bye." She looked at the time display again and cursed to herself. She was never late to work.

Natalie ran into the bathroom and stopped short of running into James, who was adjusting the temperature on a stream of water in the shower. Ignoring the golden hued skin of his torso and rippling abs, she grabbed for a clean towel and tossed it on the toilet lid.

"Please don't take this the wrong way but if you shower with me there's no way in hell I'll ever get to work at a decent hour."

The corner of his lip curled into a devious smile. "Does this mean I can't take you out for breakfast?"

"Yeah, no!" she laughed before stepping into the shower and closing the curtain between them. "My assistant is going to be at work before I am!" She made quick work of soaking her entire body before haphazardly squeezing a lump of shampoo into her hands and applying it through her damp hair.

"My assistant is always at work before me," James shared from the other side of the shower curtain.

"Yeah well that dynamic is a lot different when you're not the Chief Creative Officer."

"Point taken," he called out. "Can I at least make you a breakfast to go so I know you won't starve yourself on coffee alone?"

Natalie couldn’t help but smile to herself. The all-powerful CCO and sexy-as-fuck Gentleman Twelve was going to make
her
breakfast, all efforts to disprove her proclamation that he was a romantic at heart to the contrary.

"Be my guest."

She finished as fast as she could before dressing in a yellow shift dress, metallic gold flats and applying the least amount of makeup possible to make her look like she spent more than ten minutes getting ready for work. She'd just barely had time to run a comb through her hair when her phone beeped an alert reminding her she had a meeting in exactly forty-five minutes.

"Crap!" she practically screamed. "Okay I
really
have to go now. Can you please be sure to lock up behind you?" she shouted as she hunted for her bag and keys.

"Right here," James calmly motioned to her belongings that he held in his hands.

"Thanks!" she sighed.

"Relax," he admonished her. "I ordered you a car." He said it so nonchalantly that Natalie did a double take. "The driver will be here in three minutes and you'll save time by being dropped off instead of parking your car." He handed her the satchel, keys, and a bag with an undisclosed breakfast order.

Her brain could barely keep up. "How am I supposed to get home if I don't have my car with me?"

"I'll pick you up." It was a statement of fact, not an offer, and one that intuitively made her guard go up.

"James you know you can't-"

He pulled her into his arms and looked down on her with cool resolve. "It's Tuesday. You have a standing date with Quinn to get drinks every Tuesday. You can drive with her to the bar and I'll pick you up. We'll go to dinner and finally have that conversation we've been meaning to have."

Suddenly a lump formed in her throat.
That conversation
? Her heartbeat quickened. World altering sex in the morning followed by potentially life-altering relationship discussion in the evening? Was that his plan the whole time?

He cocked his head to one side. "Why do you look so worried?"

Because what if
that conversation
means that this morning will have been the last of our time together?
If he asked her to quit her job just so they could be together... It was a hell of a thing to spring on someone at the last minute.

"I just don't like being late for work. That's all." It wasn't technically a lie by omission if it was true.

"You'll be fine." He leaned in and pressed his lips to the space between her ear and her cheek. "Though I might not be, sitting at my desk today knowing what we did on it yesterday."

Natalie's cheeks flushed as she suppressed a satisfied smile. "Good luck with that."

Thanks to the car service Natalie managed to avoid being late to her meeting. She kept her head down and tried to focus only on work as the hours drifted by in a relatively uneventful fashion. At a quarter to three Shane knocked on her door and didn't wait for a response before waltzing into her office, an excited smile on his face.

"So I just got an interesting email from someone requesting to be placed on your schedule this afternoon!"

"Oh? From who?"

"Joe Gallo."

Natalie's eyes broke their gaze from her computer screen. "The guy who transferred here with Ivy?"

"The very same one!" Shane said, practically preening in the seat opposite her at the desk. Why was he so animated about Joe Gallo wanting a meeting with her?

"Well did he say what it was about?"

"No," Shane stated without equivocation. "But there's a rumor going around that he's been trying to land a potentially
huge
client from Las Vegas, and now that everyone knows you're off of the Fitson account I think he's going to try to recruit you!"

She tried not to roll her eyes at the notion that literally every person in the office cared whether or not she was on James' account. Shane had a flair for histrionic embellishment, and she had no doubt he was exaggerating now. Although she
was
curious.

"So he wants to meet with me?"

"Actually, I'd like to take you out to dinner," came a booming voice. Natalie and Shane both looked up in tandem as the tall, dark and rugged man who had witnessed her in a state of unfortunate undress just a day prior dominated the entrance to her office. "We haven't formally met yet," he said as he strode casually to her desk. "Joe Gallo."

Natalie stood and shook his hand; his nearly engulfed hers. His skin was soft to the touch in spite of his almost aggressively-hard shake. "Nice to meet you, Joe. Natalie."

"Harlow," he finished for her. "Right. Casual dress gal." His smile revealed straight white teeth that she could only imagine were a dentists' dream.

"Unfortunate coffee accident is more like it. Please, have a seat." She motioned to where Shane sat while giving her assistant a pointed look. He got up and left wordlessly, but not without first glancing extra long at Joe before he exited completely. "What can I do for you?"

Joe sat in the seat vacated by Shane - he dwarfed it in comparison to her assistant - and leaned back as casually as one might when chatting with a friend.

"I understand that until recently you were the account manager for Fitson Entertainment Groupe?"

"Until very recently, yes," Natalie confirmed, wondering just where Joe was going with that particular line of inquisition.

"So you have experience working with their Vegas property, Eden?"

"I do, yes. Though if you know that I'm no longer account manager you must know that Ivy Whitcomb is."

His smile was brilliant, disarming even. "Yes. Here's the thing though, Natalie. I need someone with knowledge of and experience with Vegas properties to be second chair on this account I've been grooming for some time now. I've heard nothing but good things about your work and now that you're no longer on the Fitson account there shouldn't be a conflict."

Natalie leaned back in her chair and looked thoughtfully at Joe. "Conflict? Is the client another hotel?"

"No," he said, getting equally comfortable in his seat. "The client is an entertainment group, but unlike Fitson they only have one entity. But it's a big one."

She was intrigued. "What's the entity?"

"The Gentleman's Show."

At least a dozen images flashed through Natalie's head. A
Gentleman's Show
as in
for
men, or a show for women? She even briefly thought of The Golden Palm and how they referred to their members - James included - as 'Gentlemen'. She pictured a beefcake of a man with a white collar, black bowtie and bulging six-pack abs picking a Candidate from the lineup. She shook her head to clear the thought from her mind.

"Before you get any ideas-"

Too late
, she thought.

"-Let me just say that it's not like anything you've seen before." The smile on Joe's face made Natalie think that either he underestimated her and it was exactly what she thought it was, or that he was worried she would judge.

"It sounds like attractive men with equally attractive bodies dancing in near nudity for either bachelorettes or gay men."

"It's for both," he said. "Other shows in Vegas cater specifically to one crowd or the other.
The Gentleman's Show
encourages a blended audience. Yes it's definitely got that element of-"

"Beefcakiness?" she offered.

A low burst of laughter escaped Joe's mouth and he nodded his head in acknowledgement of the point. "Yes, beefcakiness. But it's not raunchy. Dare I say it's even tasteful?"

It was difficult at first for Natalie to imagine someone who looked like Joe being at all interested in an all-male Vegas show, but the more she
really
looked at him, the clearer the picture became. What was the phrase Quinn had used in describing Joe Gallo? That he was a tree any woman would love to climb? His enormous build certainly lent itself to such a visualization. For all she knew he was stacked beneath his casual black v-neck and grey sports coat, and he had the rugged look of a man who spent more than his fair share of time in the gym. He was strikingly handsome; even more so when he smiled and revealed a bit of roguish charm. Maybe a handful of years ago he could have been a beefcakey Vegas showman himself. She tried not to imagine
that
too clearly.

"I'm not sure why you would ask me to help you land this particular account. For starters we don't know each other. And some people here really frown upon sharing accounts. It tends to foster unfriendly competition." Ivy Whitcomb came immediately to mind.

Joe nodded thoughtfully. "I have my reasons." Thick, dark eyelashes framed his whiskey brown eyes as he looked at her with a confidence that began to unnerve her. He was a virtual stranger, yes, but still a co-worker and so far seemed as far opposite from Ivy Whitcomb as a single person could be. She didn't get the sense that he was in any way playing with her or trying to use her. She remained intrigued, and part of her was eager to leap at the chance to take on a new client, however vague the majority of the details were so far.

"How can I help?"

"Join me for dinner tonight," he said without missing a beat.

Natalie tried not to visibly react to his candor, but could do nothing to stop the heat from perking at her cheeks. "Are you asking me out on a date?"

"No." He shook his head, but the smile that rapidly spread across his cheeks softened the blow of what may have been her misperception or his polite rejection. "I am asking a peer I'd like to work with to listen to my ideas, give her input and help steer the direction of what could be a very prominent and lucrative account for this company. While eating dinner."

"Oh," she said, feeling only slightly chastised. "I, um, I actually have plans tonight."

"Plans you can easily reschedule?"

She knew Quinn would likely forgive her for canceling. Tt was James with whom she knew she couldn’t cancel, especially not with
that conversation
looming over the evening like a potentially stormy cloud. Though to be fair that was personal, and meeting Joe for dinner was work. She had enjoyed the Vegas-centric work that was part and parcel of being on the Fitson account, and
The Gentleman's Show
sounded like it could potentially fill a void that had recently been created thanks to Ivy. Besides, if
that conversation
were to truly transpire the way Natalie believed it would, she already knew her answer and wasn't yet prepared for the fallout it would create.

"Yes, I can reschedule," she said finally.

"Great." Joe stood and turned for the door. "I'll email your assistant the details."

"Sounds good," she smiled before turning back to her computer.

"Oh, and Natalie?"

"Yes?" She looked up at Joe as he stood an arm's distance from the office threshold.

"If I
were
asking you out, you would know it."

He was gone before she could so much as open her mouth to respond with a sound, let alone actual words. Was Joe Gallo flirting with her? No, no it couldn't be. Besides, it wasn't like she was available. Not that he knew that...

"Natalie Harlow?" came a voice from the door. She looked up half expecting him to have returned, but instead she was greeted by the same courier who had delivered James' Tiffany gift the previous day. "Package for you, ma'am."

As she signed, the courier placed a box that was at least twice as big as the first delivery on her desk. She thanked him and he left swiftly and without many words. Luckily Shane seemed too engrossed in work at his desk to offer any commentary on the fact that she was receiving another delivery that only she could sign for. And she decided that was for the best when she unboxed the parcel and discovered inside yet another Tiffany blue box. Just as she reached out to open it her phone rang.

"Natalie Harlow," she answered autonomously, her eyes still locked and curious on the box.

"I wanted to experience your reaction when you opened it," James' voice came through the headset. "And since I have no legitimate reason for coming by Brighton today I figured hearing your reaction would be better than nothing."

"You keep sending me gifts at work and people are going to start to wonder," she warned him playfully.

"Are they?"

"No," she admitted with a quick laugh. "Nobody cares about my personal life that much. But speaking of gifts this is too much! I didn't even properly thank you for the beautiful cuff from yesterday."

"Hmmm, I'm pretty sure you did though. Or have you forgotten already?"

Natalie crossed her legs and switched the phone to her other ear. "Hardly. I meant a proper thank-you though."

"Improper Natalie was thank-you enough."

She buried her face in her hand and tried to stifle the curl of laughter that came to surface.

"Go ahead. Open it."

"Okay," she sighed as she found her composure again. Balancing the phone between her head and shoulder, she used both hands to open the Tiffany box and peel back the many layers of delicately folded paper that shrouded a small, sterling silver picture frame. "It's us," she whispered.

"It is."

The photo contained inside the beautiful frame was of her, eyes closed and her mouth parted into a satisfied smile, James' lips at her ear. His face was mostly obscured; just the sharp angle of his jaw and slight profile was visible. It was from that morning. How had she missed him taking a photo of them together?

"Now you have something to put on your desk."

"James this is so-" She wanted to say it was romantic of him. "This is so wonderful. And beautiful."

"It's not too presumptuous of me, is it?"

"No," she smiled. "I mean it is a little. But it's actually quite perfect. Thank you."

"You are very welcome, Natalie."

She placed the frame on the right side of her computer screen where it would be out of view from anyone who happened into her office.

"So about tonight," he started. Natalie escaped her thoughts of their morning together and cast a glance to the chair Joe Gallo had been sitting in only moments prior. "Unfortunately I need to cancel."

Natalie had to instantly replay his words in her mind to make sure she actually heard him correctly. "Why?"

There was a brief pause. Natalie could hear James taking a deep breath. "Celine called shortly after I got in this morning."

Oh,
Natalie thought as she resisted the urge to roll her eyes like a teenager. What was Celine even doing in Los Angeles to begin with? Natalie never did find out the reason behind Celine's visit to James' hotel room just a few nights prior. What was the woman up to?

"She says she has some meeting to attend this evening and couldn't find a babysitter for Frankie. So she asked if I would babysit my own daughter."

Natalie did a double take. Very rarely did she ever hear James refer to Frankie as his daughter. She assumed it was because it was too painful, the knowledge that the child he was helping to raise wasn't actually his. Natalie could think of no greater deception than to lead a person on like that. She had purposefully decided at the outset of their relationship not to pry into that particularly private part of James' life unless he offered something from it freely, and he rarely did. Frankie was as much a stranger to Natalie as a stranger could be.

"Did you even know Celine brought Frankie with her to Los Angeles?" She was sure she already knew the answer.

"I did not. I assumed Celine's mother was watching over her in New York."

Natalie didn't know what she felt more of: anger towards Celine for her general lack of respect towards a man she had conned so viciously, or sorrow for James who barely got to see his own daughter even when they were in the same damn city.

"Audra didn't even know?"

"How would she? She barely speaks to Celine."

That
was surprising. Natalie naturally assumed the Robertson sisters were close, especially considering the relationship ties between the three of them. It was too much of a hassle to try to figure everything out, let alone guess at Celine's intentions. The woman was, as far as Natalie was concerned, cold and heartless and undeserving of much thought.

"Well I hope you have a great time with her tonight," Natalie finally said. And then she remembered her own plans and that it was
she
who thought would be canceling their evening together. "I have plenty of work to keep me busy tonight."

After a promise to make up for their lost evening James said goodbye and Natalie found herself staring at the silver photo frame, wondering at the drama James always seemed to find himself in. Manipulative soon-to-be ex-wife who is sister to his business partner and close friend. Not to mention Frankie. And in spite of all that chaos
and
running a multi-billion dollar company, he still found the time to send her a framed photo of an intimate moment just so that she could put a personal touch on her desk.