Searching for Tomorrow (Tomorrows) (6 page)

Sighing in frustration, I look at
Liam and detect the anger in his eyes. What startles me most though is the fear that I also see. I know that Mother Tidwell hates me. This is something that I have known for years, something I have tried to accept. I just didn’t know that she would use her hatred for me against my family. In a way, it makes sense. In her eyes, Tripp chose all of us over her. She has never seen that Tripp wanted her to accept us, not punish us for loving and embracing him. She has never acknowledged the fact that because of our love for Tripp, we would have welcomed her and made her part of our family. Instead, she rejected us, and by doing that, she rejected Tripp.

Her
actions not only hurt Tripp, but also affected the decisions he made about his future, about our future. If Tripp were here to witness his mother’s treacherous behavior, I truly have no idea just how he would react. This would be the only time I can ever remember that I am glad that Tripp is not here. I know that some things can cause so much damage and hurt that it’s virtually impossible to recover. I know this, because I live it every day.

I square my shoulders, stand,
and go to Liam. Slipping my arms around his waist, I offer him the only comfort that I can. “You know that we will make it through this. This can be a bump in the road, or it can be a crater. What we have to do is decide if we can go around the bump or if we are just going to give up and fall into the crater.” I lean back and take his face in my hands. “I say we go around the bump, Liam. Together, we can do this. Together, we can do anything we need to do to get around her, over her, under her, or God help us, through her.”

“Dang it
, Wrynn. Why do I feel like I am just lying down in the road and she is constantly running over me? I haven’t mentioned it before now, but this isn’t the first time she’s pulled this stunt. I lost two other clients the morning that she stormed out of here. That’s five, Wrynn. Five separate contracts in just this last month.”

Th
is explains how my brother just happened to be at my house so early the morning of the spider incident. Mother Tidwell had threatened his clients, so he had no work to do for the day. That also explains why she came back after taking the girls to school. She has always been one that likes to view her destruction up close and personal. She knew where Liam would be if he didn’t have work to do. She knew he would be with me, helping me catch up on things around the house. What better way to end her morning than by torturing her two least favorite people?

“We will get through this
no matter what comes our way, Liam. We’re a team. I wouldn’t have made it through these last few years without you. Maybe now, it’s time for you to lean on me and let me be the strong one. Let me help carry some of the burden for you. After all that you have carried for me, I think it is the least I can do.”

Pulling back,
Liam kisses me on the forehead. “No. I will handle this. I just wanted you to know what’s going on. You need to keep your eyes on her, though, cause that woman ain’t right in the head.”

“
Liam, you listen to me. No, don’t you shake your head at me. It’s bad enough that I put up with her. Now, she’s going after you. This has to stop somewhere.” I put my hand on his shoulder and give him a slight shake. “No more. You hear me? No more. I’m going over there and getting this all out in the open, and you’re not changing my mind.”

Liam
can see the determination written all over my face. With a deep sigh, and a quiet “thanks,” he walks towards the front door. Seeing his shoulders slumped in defeat breaks my heart into pieces. The two of us have been through so many struggles together, but my Liam has always been the strong one. He has always been the shoulder I would cry on, the one person that I know that I can depend on. I know that now it’s my turn to try somehow to repay him for all that he has done, for my girls and for me.

Feeling revulsion from my head to my toes, I realize what this means
. I am going to have to go to that woman, crawl back on my hands and knees. I have to ask, no, beg her to come back into our lives. She predicted it, and now I know that I will make it come true. I will fold this time, because my brother needs me more than I need my pride. It’s the only way that I can see to get us out of the mess she’s created.

Our senior year of high school started out with the normal excitement most kids feel knowing that graduation is right around the corner
. Liam and Tripp fought for and won the honor of being co-captains of the varsity football team, and I was captain of the cheerleading squad. I had decided years earlier that my cheering would be the easiest way for us all to be together. I knew that my boys agreed because that way they could keep an eye on me.

Every Friday,
the cheerleaders would lead a frenzied school crowd in chants and cheers to pump up the football team for victory. If the game was at home that week, and weather permitted it, we would all meet at the football field. Away games found us in the gym before we loaded the buses to travel. Because our town was somewhat secluded, travel to most other schools meant hours on a stinky, old activity bus.

The date for our Homecoming game fell on Friday, September 14, 2001.
The entire week before the big game was a little different for us. Because our town was so small, most everyone participated in our weeklong Homecoming festivities. Every morning, several of our local merchants would pull out all the stops to honor the players, each providing food of some sort. After all, these were growing boys, and they were always hungry. Some merchants gave shirts, mugs, water bottles, or koozies decorated with the homecoming theme to the student body. It was always a great feeling knowing that the whole town supported the team and wanted a homecoming victory. The football team and cheerleaders would eat while listening to the sponsors of the day dole out pep talks. In the mornings, after we had eaten, the student body would then meet in the gym for a short pep rally, making sure that school spirit stayed high throughout the week.

Tuesday was the second day of the
weeklong celebration leading up to the big game and started out the same as all the others. Buck’s Coffee was the sponsor that day, providing the most delicious spicy cheese biscuits and cinnamon scones. By 8:25, the players and cheerleaders were finished eating and were preparing to greet the excited student body.

At 8:30
, the gym doors opened, and a rush of bodies swarmed through in a race to the bleachers. The excitement level was so high that you could feel it. The bleachers and floor vibrated as feet stomped in a steady rhythm of percussion, and cheers spontaneously broke out among the students. The spirit cry of “Highlanders! Highlanders!” was loud enough that the folks down at Town Hall could hear it.

The frenzied student body had
worked their excitement to epic proportions by the time the cheerleaders made it out to the gym floor, executing various flips and tumbles along the way. Forming parallel lines, the cheerleaders faced each other, creating a human tunnel for the football players to run through. With pom-poms raised and shaking, the cheerleaders prepared to lead the students in a chant, naming each player as he ran out. Mr. Draheim, the assistant principal, stood at the lectern and called each name over the PA system. Mr. Jetter, the principal, would emerge after the last of the players, and then give a small pep talk to the student body.

Because they were co-captain
s, my boys were the first called, and therefore the first to run through the tunnel. I stationed myself at the far end of the line, and as Tripp ran up to me, he picked me up and spun me around before planting a firm kiss on my lips. The students went wild with their screaming and started chanting, ‘kiss her again’ over and over.

While the nature of our relationship was no secret to anyone, public display
s of affection were unacceptable at school. Mr. Draheim noisily cleared his throat, and just as he opened his mouth to reprimand us, the gym door slammed against the wall. Mrs. Bowen, the librarian, rushed inside and straight up to the podium. I immediately turned around so that I could see what was happening.

It was quite evident that she was distraught
. Her face was red and her meticulous bun was starting to slip from its knot. Tears streamed down her face as she approached Mr. Draheim. Covering the microphone with her hand, she leaned forward and whispered something in his ear.

A look of shock crossed Mr. Draheim’s face. Holding his composure
together by only a thread, he stopped the pep rally and called Mr. Jetter to the microphone. While the bewildered students looked on, the three adults quietly conferred. With a look of dread, Mr. Jetter turned and announced to the student body, “I’m sorry to interrupt the pep rally, but I need all teachers to go to your classrooms, and then I need each of you to calmly exit the gym, freshman class first, and make your way straight to your homeroom. Please wait there for further instruction.”

Tripp still had his arms wrapped around me
from when he’d picked me up. He gently turned me so that I faced him again. “Until we know what’s going on, I do NOT want you leaving my side. Your class or mine?”

Knowing that Tripp and
Liam shared every class, as well as homeroom, made my choice an easy one. “Let’s just go to your class; that way we’ll all be together. I need to stop by and check in with Mrs. Keyse or she’ll mark me absent.” I knew that if we went to my class, then Liam would be worried about me.

As we walked from the gym,
Liam walked up on the other side of me. “Sis, you’re with Tripp until we know something more. I’m going to head over to Mom’s class to see if she knows anything.” He kissed me on the head, punched Tripp on the arm, and walked off in the direction of the elementary wing.

Tripp pulled me tightly against his side as we mad
e our way down the crowded hall and said, “I just can’t imagine what has happened, but whatever it is must be pretty bad for the pep rally to be canceled right in the middle. Wonder if the President was shot or something.”

I just snuggled deeper into his side. A sense of bad thing
s to come had completely struck me dumb and numb. I did not need to know what had happened. I just felt this hole in my stomach telling me that whatever it was, it was not good. As I looked down the hall and saw my sweet brother racing towards us with a panicked look on his face, I knew that life had just changed for all of us. I certainly had no idea just how much it would change.

When
Liam reached us, he told us that all Mom knew for certain was that two planes had crashed into the World Trade Center, and it was rumored there were more locations. The buildings were burning and people trapped above the fire level could not get out. She really did not have any more details, but if we wanted, we could come to her class when school dismissed. Just then, word from the principal about an early dismissal of classes within the hour cam over the intercom, so Liam, Tripp, and I all went to the office, signed ourselves out, and then headed back to the elementary wing.

As we walked the halls, it seemed every class
had turned on the television. Our plans were to catch the news in Mom’s room, but sounds came from all sides and echoed off the ceiling. Knowing only that planes had crashed, we expected sounds of explosions, but the sounds we heard were of gasps, sobs, and curses. We stopped in a doorway to see if we could figure out what had happened. It was then that we saw first one plane as it crashed into a building, and then a second plane as it crashed into the twin building. Tripp had me in such a tight hold that by later that morning bruises had already formed. Neither of us noticed though, because we focused completely on the nightmare playing out, right before our very eyes.

September
11, 2001 was a time of great sadness for the United States. The 9/11 attacks were coordinated terrorist strikes launched against the United States. Four passenger airliners were hijacked and used in suicide missions. In total, almost 3,000 people died in the attacks, including the 227 civilians and 19 hijackers aboard the planes. It was later discovered that more planes had been targeted to destroy other buildings, but the nationwide shutdown of all the airports prevented these plans from becoming a reality.

The sound
s of sobbing seemed to break through the haze that clouded my mind. It was then that I realized that I had buried my face in Tripp’s chest in a feeble attempt to put the horrible pictures out of my mind. Tripp’s grip on me changed from bruising to soothing as he attempted to calm my frantic wails. Nothing in my almost eighteen years could have prepared me for the sight of such devastation and loss. I seriously doubted that anything ever could have.

I lifted my eyes to Tripp’s and what I saw made my heart stutter and stop for a moment. While I could see the confusion and hurt that he felt, I also saw an anger that alarmed me
. My Tripp’s disposition had always been playful, tender, and easygoing. Having rarely seen him mad, I was not quite sure how I should react to what I was seeing. Questions must have sparked from my eyes because Tripp immediately pulled me closer and placed tender kisses, first on my forehead, then on the tip of my nose, and finally on my lips. He lingered on the last kiss, which only increased my concern. What I felt in that kiss, in that moment, told me that I would need to be prepared, but for what? I had no idea.

Tripp seemed to draw into himself. He became
depressed, and almost irate. When we left school, he dropped Liam and me off at the house and then left. He said he had some thinking to do, and that he would be back when his thoughts settled down. It was only 10:00 in the morning, and I had no idea when I would see him again, or where he would go to think.

This was such an abrupt change
in Tripp. I had no idea how to handle it. I couldn’t help but feel alarmed. Tripp had never pulled back from me, separated himself from me. Not one single, solitary time. I was clueless as to how I should process all the thoughts and emotions that were swirling around in my head.

Liam
wrapped his arm around me and carefully guided me towards the house. When we stepped onto the porch, instead of taking me inside, he led me over to the porch swing. We sat there, slowly swaying back and forth, his arms enveloped around me while my tears drenched his shirt. Liam smoothed his hand over my hair and whispered, “It’s going to be okay,” over and over again.

I had no idea how long
Liam and I sat like that on the swing. I only know that when I heard Tripp close the door on his truck, the sun had already begun its journey behind the mountains. The temperatures had approached the freezing mark. In my numbed state, I had somehow missed the slow passing of time.

Tripp climbed the steps, and as he reached for the front doorknob, the movement of the swing caught his eye. He turned towards
Liam and me and hesitated. “My Wrynn.” His whisper broke the silence. Those anguished words brought me to my feet and forward, propelling me into his arms. I had no doubt that was where I belonged—sheltered, enveloped, protected … loved.

I felt the flex of his muscles when his arms squeezed me tighter. My face burrowed into his chest as I tried to get closer to the heat pouring from his body. His mouth dipped to my ear as he whispered his love for me
, and his promise of forever. He apologized for leaving me when he knew I needed him, and told me that he would always be there for me.

I turned my head and sought reassurance that he spoke the truth
as his lips met mine. Time stopped, and a fire that I had never before felt burned through me. This was no soft, gentle peck. This was a kiss filled with hunger and desperation. The need flowed between us as I opened my lips beneath his. Our tongues danced together, and as Tripp drew my body closer, a deep longing-filled moan drew up from the depths of my being. The world around us disappeared, as I held tight to the man who had claimed my very soul.

This was the kiss that I had always longed for. The kiss that marked me as his. The kiss that spoke to me of forever. The feelings and emotions
it evoked told me the story of his never-ending love.

A throat cleared behind us. The
sound startled me and broke through the invisible walls that we had temporarily erected around our bodies. As I looked up, I met the reddened eyes and tear stained cheeks of my parents, and realized Liam had somehow slipped off the porch unnoticed. I felt as if someone had doused my fire with cold water. I shivered and Tripp’s arms tightened around me once more. He then released me, only to turn me around so that we both faced my parents.

Tripp’s arms
embraced me again as he pulled my body flush against him. He looked first to Mom and then to Dad. “I have something I need to talk to you about. Some of the things I’ve been thinking about today. Decisions that I know I need to make, but I need your help, your wisdom. You’ve never failed to give me guidance, and I need it now more than ever.”

Dad took a deep breath and cupped my face in his hands. His eyes never left mine though he spoke solely to Tripp. “Son, you know we love you.
Heck, you’re one of ours. We’ll do anything possible to help you. You know that. I see the confused, angry look in your eyes and I understand. I really do. But after all that has happened today, do you really think it’s a good time to be making life-changing decisions? Decisions that will affect all of us? Decisions that could shatter my little girl into a million broken pieces?”

Now
, I had always considered myself a fairly intelligent person, but at that exact moment, I lacked even one ounce of understanding as to what I was witnessing. My brain was so muddled that I just couldn’t comprehend what anyone was saying. The look in my father’s eyes gave me mixed messages. I saw love, of course, and understanding, compassion even. What confused and scared me though was the underlying glimpse of fear that I detected.