Saving Each Other (BWWM Romance) (36 page)

Over the next few months I began to take better care of myself. There were no more late nights. No more alcohol. I didn’t even enjoy the occasional wine like I used to. I also began yoga classes. I didn’t have anyone and finally I started going to classes in the evening for expectant mothers. It was there that I met Heather.

Heather was a thirty-year-old baker. She owned a little shop in the middle of town. Like me, she was alone and had no one to turn to. She was in her last trimester however and had begun to make friends in the small group of women. I finally confided in her everything that had happened.

“Well it is a decision that you have to make. My son’s father knows about him but he wants nothing to do with him. I have tried to get him to agree to see the child. He says he has his family and he doesn’t want any more kids.” She shrugged. Although she tried to act like she didn’t care, I could see the pain and sadness in her eyes. Her son would never know his father. I knew however that she would find someone and told her so all the time. She was a good woman and deserved to be happy.

“It’s his loss. Your man though doesn’t even know. Don’t you think you should give him the choice? You may be surprised. He may want to be a dad. There are some good men out there, Trina; although we haven’t met them yet, they are there.” Heather’s situation was horrible. She had lived with the man for over a year with his son. She had received a call one morning that her grandmother was in the hospital. She had raised her when her parents died and was the only person she had left in the world. She had dropped everything to get to her side as she died. When she came back home she had received devastating news from a neighbor.

It seemed that while the man’s son was gone for the summer, he had been traipsing women in and out of their house. He had told her he wanted to be single again and when she told him she was pregnant, he had demanded that she get rid of it. He had said that he didn’t want any more children and it was because of her that he was tied down. She had left that night and hadn’t seen him again.

Our situations were completely different but we did have one thing in common. We were both alone in the world. This caused a bond between us and I had a friend by my side for life. It was the first time that I allowed myself to trust another person for anything.

***

“I’m sorry, Earl. It's just something I need to do for myself.”

“But leave, really, Trina? You're my best executive and I need you. It’s because of him isn’t it?”

“Who?” I had never seen Earl mad before but I could read anger on his face as he looked at me.

“You know who. That arrogant bastard that came here demanding this and that. Talking about how he cared.”

“He did care, Earl. He was here to help.”

“Don’t you take up for him. Don’t you dare. He is the reason you're leaving.”

“No he’s not.”

“Yes he is. Don’t think for one second I don’t know what is going on. I am a father of four. I know a pregnant woman when I see one. I saw Sally change with all four of our girls.”

“What?” My head snapped up as I looked at him. I saw the sympathy in his eyes.

“Yeah, I’ve known since the hospital. I thought, however, that you would have told me by now. It’s been four months. I didn’t think you would come to me and quit though.”

“I’m sorry Earl. I just… I need to get stuff together and I can’t work here anymore.”

“What if we do a work from home position?” His eyes were hopeful as he looked up at me. I already knew what I was doing. I had already gotten an offer across town. I shook my head sadly as I walked from his office. I heard the crash of something against the wall as I walked down the hall to my own office. Earl was not happy. I had never seen him act the way he did and knew that he cared.

***

It was just a few weeks later that I held Heather’s hand as she gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. She cuddled him deep in her arms as we both laughed and cried. It was then that I knew she was right. David needed to know about his child. I needed to get everything together first though.

  I sat in the living room and looked down. My stomach was now rounded out to where it was hard to walk, much less see my feet. I may have felt like a whale and miserable with the cravings and morning sickness. Who were they kidding? The morning should have just been called sickness. I had it all the time and unfortunately I was not one of the fortunate ones where it went away after the first three months. No. My little man kept me hurling over the commode my whole pregnancy. The sickness did tend to lessen in the last month or so, but I was close to my delivery date too. I sat there rubbing my belly as I flicked through the channels. I was cut down to part time at this point and had been taken off work completely the past week. Heather and the baby had just left. She made it a habit to come by every day and called at least twice. There was once when I was in the bathroom and didn’t answer. She had been so worried she came right over. Now I took the phone with me everywhere.

***

I turned on the TV and saw another story about David in the entertainment news. “Mr. Bad Boy David Smith has popped the question. Yep. I hear wedding bells in the air for Mr. Smith and his girlfriend. They haven’t even been dating for a year yet and she already has that huge rock."

"Good for them. I just can’t wait to see the dress.” I felt my heart hit the ground. I was suddenly heaving and I felt the tears slide from my eyes down my cheeks. He was gone. He was really gone. I didn’t think it would hurt like this. I didn’t think that I would mind this much that he had moved on. He was a pompous ass as I had called him before. But I had been thinking of him as my pompous ass. I looked at the screen and saw the two of them together. He wasn’t mine. He never was and now I knew. He belonged to her. I stood to make my way to the kitchen and felt a sharp pain rip through my stomach just before I heard water. Looking down, I realized I was in labor. I had just called Heather and told her what was going on when the contractions hit. Thankfully she had set up for one of the girls to come over as she took me to the hospital.

I gave birth to an amazing baby boy on a Monday evening. He had a head full of dark hair and I was instantly in love. There was something about giving birth. I was thankful that I got to experience the joy. I suddenly felt bad that David wasn’t there to enjoy it with me. I cradled my baby boy against me as I rocked him to sleep. I knew I needed to give him the choice. He needed to know that he was a father. I didn’t want anything from him but I did need to give him the choice. If I didn’t, I knew I would be cheating not only him but my son as well. I soon found out what mothers meant with the lack of sleep thing. Although my big eater was up every two hours, I got up with him and enjoyed every minute of it. It was a rewarding experience. The time finally came when I needed to tell David.

“Hello.”

“Hello, David.” My hand shook as I tried to hold the phone to my ear.

“Hold on.” I heard him saying something in the background and then I heard his voice again. “Hello, Trina. Is everything okay? I heard you left the company.”

“Yeah. I thought it was best under the circumstances.”

“You know that wasn’t necessary. No matter what happened between us, you were a good employee and a great asset to the company as a whole. You know that.”

“Thank you. That means a lot coming from you. I just didn’t feel right and well…”

“Well what?”

“I didn’t want to run into you.”

“Wow. I didn’t think you hated me that much.”

“I don’t hate you, David. Look I’m calling because I needed to talk to you about something.”

“Okay.”

“Actually… Would you mind if we did it in person? I think it would be better.”

“Uh. Yeah. But I went by your place and you weren’t there. Actually I went there more than once over the months and you were never there. Finally someone told me you moved.”

“Yeah. I live over in Stoney Brooke now.”

“Oh. Well give me your address.” I gave him my address and took a deep breath. “When is good? I’m actually in town today and I can come at any time.”

“Oh. You’re here.”

“Yeah. We just landed a little while ago.” I knew that meant that she was with him. It almost had me calling the whole thing off until I thought of my son. He needed his father. Even if David wasn’t in my life, he could be in his son’s life.

“Anytime. I’m at home now and will be for the rest of the evening.”

“Okay. I will be over there soon. Let me check into the hotel and stuff first.”

“Okay. I will see you soon then.”

“Yes. See you soon.” I pushed the button to end the call and jumped when the phone rang again. Looking down to see it was Heather, I answered. I hung up the phone some time later. Heather was a good friend and after a much needed pep talk, I was ready to go. Then it hit me. He had said that he came by my house. Why? Why would he come by my house?

Chapter 15

I had just laid Jamal down when the doorbell rang. I quickly made my way to the door. Taking a deep breath I slowly opened it. There he was. David Smith had the same grin on his face as he looked me over. I suddenly felt self-conscious of him looking at me. I was actually smaller than I had been when we had been together. I had only gained 23 pounds during the pregnancy and thanks to breast feeding, I had lost close to 28 pounds since Jamal’s birth.

“Hello, Trina.” His eyes regarded me with the same intense look he had used before and I felt my knees go week. I shook myself thinking that I needed to tell him what was going on. This was to tell him he was a father, not to try and get in his pants. He was engaged, for heaven’s sake. The last thing I wanted to do was break up a happy home.

“Hello, David,” I murmured hesitantly. Please let this be the right thing to do.

“You look good.”

“Thank you. You do as well.” I stood there as my eyes traveled over his body. Who was I kidding? I wanted to eat him alive. I wanted him desperately and it took everything I had within me not to tell him so or grab him and kiss him. He stood there and the grin grew into a full blown smile. I realized that I was admiring his body and could have smacked myself for it. He obviously had noticed it as well. “Please come in.” He followed me into the foyer and then into the living room. “Can I get you something to drink? I’m sorry I don’t have any alcohol. I can’t have it since I’m…” I instantly stopped my next words but I didn’t need them. His eyes looked over the room and I noticed Jamal’s toys and the bottle I had just fed him were lying around. Suddenly there was a cry from the back room. Well I guess there was no time like the current. I guess I wouldn’t need to skirt around the topic. He was going to see firsthand. “Excuse me. That’s Jamal.”

His eyebrow rose as I quickly made my way from the living room. I walked into the nursery and there was my little bundle of joy. He was wiggling back and forth on the bed, cooing and making lots of baby noises.

“There’s my baby boy. What are you making so much racket in here for? Don’t like it that my attention isn’t on you for the moment huh? Come here you.” I gathered him up in my arms and kissed the top of his head as I turned to walk back into the living room. “I have someone I want you to meet, little one.” I stopped dead as I looked up to see David standing in the doorway. His eyes looked from my arms to my little bundle I held and then back again.

“Is that…”

“Meet Jamal, David. He's my son.”

“Wow. I didn’t know you had a baby. He is gorgeous."

“Well actually he's our baby.”

"You mean?"

“Yes, David. He is your son. I was pregnant with your child.”

“That’s why you left the company, isn’t it?” He looked at me angrily and made his way to us. I clutched my son to me, suddenly worried but then I watched as he looked at him.

“Yes. I knew it would get back to you if I stayed and began to show.”

“Didn’t you think I should know? Didn’t you think I had a right to know, Trina? Don’t you think I should have been there for my son’s birth?”

“I do now. I’m sorry David but you were dating again and now you’re getting married.”

“He’s my son. I have a son. My gosh. I’m a daddy. Can I… Can I hold him?”

“Of course.” I held him out to David as he gathered him in his arms. I watched as daddy and son looked at each other. He looked amazed as Jamal curled his fingers around his large finger. They looked at each other like they both belonged there with one another. I felt the tears seep from my eyes slowly as they fell down my cheeks. I watched David’s face spread with a smile that reached across his face. He looked at me with wonder and then I felt his finger against my cheek as he swept a tear away.