Saving Axe (Motorcycle Club Romance, Cowboy, Military) (Inferno Motorcycle Club) (25 page)

"
Are there rides?"  MacKenzie jumped up and down, pulling on the sleeve of April's shirt.  "Can we do rides?  Can we?"

"Yes, yes, yes!" April said, scooping Mac up in her arms.  "But
let's let Mr. Austin show us around a little bit first, okay?  This is really nice, Stan."

"
Cade used to love it, growing up," my dad said.  "Of course, it didn't used to be crowded like this, either.  Now you've got people from the bigger towns coming in, tourists too.  Not just locals anymore."

When we were kids, the town celebration was all about the
carnival rides.  In high school, it was all about coming here to dance under the huge open tent, an excuse to hang out and flirt with girls.  For me, though, it was always about being here with June, slow-dancing in the summer evening, her body pressed up against mine.

I had no desire to go inside.  It wasn't the same, being here without June.  I wanted to go tell her I'd been wrong, that more than anything, I wanted to be with her.  But that wasn't good for her.

"No, I don't want to go dance," MacKenzie said, beside me, her nose wrinkled.  "Where are the rides?"

"We should go on rides," I agreed.  "I think there must be some around here somewhere."

It was a while before we'd exhausted MacKenzie enough on rides for my dad to pull us back toward the tent, where the adults tended to congregate.  He craned his neck, trying to see around the crowds.  "Cade," he said.  "You remember Mr. Hendricks, your old shop teacher?  He wants to say hi.  I told him I'd bring you by.  And a couple guys from down at the VFW want to say hello."

"
Dad," I said.  "No VFW stuff, no socializing.  We're not meeting up with everyone in town.  We're trying to stay low."  It had been over the top when I'd come back here, after I'd gotten the Silver Star.  I didn't need a big production being made again.  Especially now, under these circumstances.

I knew it was a bad idea, coming here.

"It's a couple people.  I'll find them, bring them over quietly," dad said.  "I'll be back."  He ducked inside the tent and disappeared.

"Mommy," MacKenzie whined.  "I don't want to go in there.  Just one more time in the bounce house?"

"Only if daddy says it's okay," April said.

"Please," Crunch said, turning toward me.  "Please, don't make me do the bounce house again.  Let me go where there's beer."

I sighed.  "Fine.  Let's go in."

"Oh, I see how it is," April protested.  "Now I'm stuck with the bounce house and the screaming kids?"

"You mind, babe?" Crunch asked.

"No, you boys go," she
said.  "I'll just be outside with the hordes of children hopped up on cotton candy."

"Yay!  We can have cotton candy, too!" MacKenzie grabbed April's hand and pulled her toward the rides.

Crunch looked up at the tent.  "You're gonna show off your dance moves, right?"

"Fuck you, man," I said.

No sooner than we were inside, did I hear, "Well, as I live and breathe.  If it isn't Cade Austin."  I turned to see - oh, what the hell was her name, anyway?  Meghan.  No, it was another M- name.  Melanie, that was it.  Nothing like forgetting a girl you once hooked up with.  She approached us, hips swaying, tits barely squeezed into her top, teetering on heels too high for a country dance.  Sauntering toward us like she owned the place.

"Melanie," I said.  "How are you?"  I looked behind her, scanning the crowds.  Looking for June
, not sure if I wanted to find her or know where she was so I could avoid her.

"You're a sight for sore eyes, Cade," she said, putting her hand on my forea
rm.  I flinched at her touch.

Crunch raised his eyebrows. 
"Hi."

Melanie took a sip from her plastic cup, and I could smell the alcohol.  She looked Crunch up and down, then dismissed him, turning her attention back toward me.  "You're looking good, Cade."

"Thanks, Melanie." 
You too
would have probably been the polite thing to say, but, let's face it, I didn't want to encourage her any more than the alcohol was already doing.

"Do you know that Cade and I used to date in high school?" Melanie asked Crunch, slurring her words.  She wobbled on her feet, and I caught her by the arm.  She stumbled forward a little, put her hand on my chest
.

"Oh, did you?" Crunch asked, smiling at me.  I glared back at him and shook my head "no".  The last thing in the world I wanted right now was dru
nk Melanie hanging all over me.

"Did you just say no, Cade Austin?" she asked, slapping me playfully on the chest.  "Being all coy doesn't suit you.  We dated right before he went off and joined the Marines."

Dated
was a loose term for what we had, I thought.  We screwed a few times, senior year, after June had left.  I was a horny high school football player, and she was the head cheerleader.

"And he always came back and saw me, when he was home on leave, didn't you, Cade?"

I guess I fucked her a few times after that, too.

"
Haven't heard from you in a while, though, Cade.  People say that you're a biker now."  She leaned in close, her breath hot on my ear.  I only felt revulsion.  I wanted to push her away from me, but causing a scene was exactly the opposite of laying low.  And if there was one thing Melanie had always been good at, it was causing a fucking scene.

"Crunch and I were on our way to talk to some of dad's friends
, Melanie."

"Crunch," she said.  "Is that your
biker name?  You know I love a bad boy, Cade."  She leaned in close, ran her tongue along the edge of my earlobe.

I jerked away.  "You're drunk, Melanie.  And I'm not interested."  I
pushed her back, away from me.

And looked up to see June, ten o
r so feet away, stopped in her tracks, just staring at us.  Looking fucking amazing in a white sundress, her hair swept up in a ponytail.

Damn it.

I watched her turn on her heel, duck behind a cluster of people, and then I was just pissed off.  "I said, I'm not interested, Melanie.  Get the fuck out of here."

"You're such an asshole, Cade Austin," she said, stumbling back on
her heels.  "You always were."

"Shit," I said.  "This wasn't a good idea, coming here.  I told you that."

"We can go back to the house," Crunch said.

"Fuck that.  I need a drink."  I started toward the bar, then stopped.  "Well?  Are you coming or not?"

Crunch trailed behind me.  "Why don't we just go home, man?"

Now I was alread
y spun up.  I needed something to take the edge off.  "Whatever you have in the keg."  I tossed some cash on the makeshift bar, and the bartender handed me a cup.  I swallowed a few gulps, exhaling at the soothing feeling as the alcohol slid down my throat.

"Fuck it," I said.  "I'm not going home."

"Let's just go," he said.  He looked across the room, then back at me, and I turned, following his gaze.  There was June, talking to Jed.

"Axe,"
Crunch warned, his voice low.

The blood rushed to my head and I could feel my heartbeat in my ears.  I w
atched her smile at him, and I could feel myself start to lose it.  No way was that douchebag cop going to look at June like that.

"Axe, don't do anything stupid."

I swallowed the other half of my beer and watched June laugh, her ponytail swinging as she moved.

Fuck that.

"Axe."  I heard Crunch call me, but I didn't give a shit.  I pushed through the people on the dance floor. 

"Excuse you," a woman said as I moved her to the side.

"How are you, Cade?" Jed asked, his voice overly pleasant.  Even standing there in his jeans and a polo shirt, he still looked like a cop.  He had always been an arrogant little prick, even in high school.  And he'd always had a thing for June.

I ignored him.  If I talked to him, I was going to hit him, and that wasn't
exactly good for laying low.  "June," I said.

"I'm busy, Cade," she said.  "And you smell like beer."

"Come with me," I said, my eyes trained on hers.

"I'm said I was busy
."  But she turned around, toward me.  Away from Jed.

From behind her, Jed said, "You heard
what June said, Cade.  She's busy.  Now, you need to leave here before you do something that gets you arrested for harassment."

I could hear him talking, but his voice faded into the background, mixed together with the
cacophony of sounds, the music and the voices underneath the tent.  June was in front of me, looking up at me.  I couldn't think of anything else except her.

"
Just a minute, Jed," June said.  Jed glared at me, and walked away, a few feet to the side, but I could see him staring at us out of the corner of my eye.  June crossed her hands over her chest.  "What do you want, Cade?"

"You."
  I don't know if it was seeing Jed talking to her like that, knowing that he wanted her, but I was suddenly filled with total clarity about what I wanted.

"
Say what you have to say."

"No," I said.  "I want you."
  It was the really first honest thing I'd said in a long time.  I wanted her.  I didn't care what it took or what I had to give up to have her.  I only knew I wanted her, and not just for right now.

"Well, I don't know if I want you."

"Bullshit," I said.  I leaned over, and picked her up, slung her up over the top of my shoulder, carrying her out of the tent.

"Fuck you, Cade," she said.  "I swear to God, if you're showing my ass to this entire pla
ce -"

"
Goddamnit, Cade," she yelled, outside of the tent.  She punched me in the back.  "Put me down."  I set her down on the ground, and she hit me in the chest this time.  "What the hell are you doing, carrying me out of there like some kind of fucking caveman?"

"It was too loud in there
.  I couldn't hear you."

"It was too loud in there?  That's your fucking excuse for acting like a
complete Neanderthal?" she asked, her voice getting louder.

I heard footsteps behind me.  "June, are you okay?"  Jed's voice.

She nodded.  "Yeah, Jed, I'm fine.  Just give me some space."

"You let me know if I need to ta
ke care of anything," he said.

"So, what, are you with
Jed now?"  I glanced back at him, retreating back into the tent.

"What if I were, Cade?  It's none of your business, is it?" she asked.  "You're the one who's leaving here.  You ran out of my house, remember?"

"June, that's not - "

"Save it," she said
, anger flashing behind her eyes.  "I don't want to hear it.  Did you really think I thought you were going to stay here, that we would have some kind of happy ever after?  You said it yourself.  You're too fucked up for me.  You want to wallow in self-pity, think you're too fucked up to be happy, convince yourself that this self-destructive path you're on is the only thing you deserve, it's not my fucking problem."

"June, I -"

She held up her hand.  "You're not going to say anything that makes a difference, Cade.  It's time to let go.  For both of us."  She turned to walk away, and I grabbed her arm.

"Let me go, Cade."

"I can't."  I just couldn't.

"Let me go."  She pulled her arm from my grasp, and started to walk away.

"I can't let you go, June," I said.  She stopped, but didn't turn around.  Just stood still, motionless.

"I love you," I
said.  "I've loved you for as long as I can remember.  I've loved you since before I knew what it meant to love anyone.  Since I was a kid, June."

June turned around, stood still.  I couldn't read the expression on her face.

"There's been no one since you, June.  No one that matters.  It's you.  It always has been.  I lost you once.  I can't lose you again."  My voice shook.

There.  I said it.

It was everything I had.

I felt naked, standing there before her, waiting for her to open her mouth and j
ust destroy me with her words.

I don't love you.

It's what I was waiting to hear.

"Take me home," she said, her voice so so
ft I didn't think I heard her.

I reached for her hand, drew her against
me, held her against my chest.

Where she belonged.

"Take me home now," she said.