Save the Last Bullet for God (38 page)

After we crossed a small mountain beyond the
forest, we came across a military camp on the plains. Fortunately,
they were looking for us. I led the soldier to the infirmary where
we hugged and said goodbye to each other. Then, after reporting
what we had been through to the command center, I was sent back to
the front.

I learned much later that the offensive I
had been involved in was the battle of Somme and that one million
people had died. One million people. If each soul weighs twenty-one
grams, then twenty-three tons had left the Earth in that fight.

That made me think of the one life I had
saved and it reminded me of the story of the boy and the starfish.
After a storm, the story goes, countless starfish were stranded on
the coast in the morning. A little boy walked among them, throwing
the ones he could reach back to the sea. A man came up to the boy
and said, “There are so many starfish, does it make any difference
to save them?” The child looked at the man, then at the starfish in
his hand, and threw the starfish into the sea. Then he turned to
the man and said, “It makes a difference to that one.”

I never asked the name of the soldier. The
pain, death and horror I witnessed after that day lasted for so
many years that, if the incident with the blind man hadn’t been my
first memory of the war, I would have forgotten all about it. When
the war ended, I went back to Vienna, and years later, I moved to
Germany. When I read about temporary blindness as a possible
symptom of battlefield stress, I remembered that poor soldier and
the time we spent in the forest.

It was only later, while working as a
successful psychiatrist and psychoanalyst and trying to publish my
own objections to the political movements around me, that I began
to experience the disadvantages of being Jewish. My academic
achievements and confidence in myself didn’t save me from the
harassment, insults, and attacks of 1933. After I published my
books
Mass Psychology of Fascism
and
Character Analysis
,
several articles in the newspapers targeted me personally. It was a
thoroughly depressing time.

That’s why, when I spied two young men with
brown shirts coming out of a pitch-dark car and approaching the
door of my house, I thought my end was near. I opened the door in
despair, and when they only pressed an envelope in my hand, I was
astonished. I opened the envelope with hands shaking from a mix of
fear and relief. Inside, was a letter addressed to me along with a
few official, signed documents. The documents consisted of a single
permission to leave the country, including the proper supporting
papers. The letter addressed to me was a single page and topped by
a letterhead featuring an eagle holding a swastika in its
claws.

Dear Lieutenant,

You asked me to pay you what I owed. As I
have erased everything that belonged to my previous life, I would
love to include you in this. You might have already realized how
rapidly I moved on to do what I said I would after the war.
Gathering information in order to build my strength, I have
followed your life after the war quite closely, and I have learned
much about your past, including your childhood. Of course, your old
tutor, who now works for me, contributed a lot. I am sorry for what
happened to your mother, and I assure you, after the process of
taking advantage of him is over, your tutor will be punished as a
little favor from me.

I politely insist that you leave the country
so that you will not be affected by what is coming, nor risk
conflict with me over your political views. Please note that this
request, and the concession, are one-time offers only. The
necessary documents and permission are attached.

Signature: The Nationalist Socialist German
Workers Party and the Chancellor of Germany,

Adolf Hitler

When I turned the page over with my
still-shaking hands, I found a pencil drawing: An old tree, and in
its trunk a little open cavity, a lake beside the tree, and a
pitch-black forest encircling them all. The memory returned of a
blind soldier drawing—using my eyes.

When the child chose a starfish from among
the thousands on the beach and threw it back to the sea, did he
carry the weight of that starfish’s later sins? How many people can
you kill by saving one?

Limbo

“Welcome back, sir.”

“Where am I? Who are you?”

“It is the Limbo Station. You have recalled
the experiment of Wilhelm Reich for the last time.”

“Yes, yes. I remember everything now.”

“By ‘everything’, you mean that you have all
your memories and abilities back, right?”

“I can only say ‘probably.’ I am not in a
position to compare, as you know. I feel like I have myself back
and I know who we are. We developed and evolved on a planet in a
faraway star system. We don’t have shape or form. We are made of
pure information and energy.”

“Correct, Sir.”

“But I still have questions. Why don’t we
have...? I mean, are we a life form at all? Why do we need human
bodies?”

“Your race was born and developed in a star
system in another galaxy. You have reached the last step in your
development, one in which you no longer need an organic form.”

“The last step?”

“The last step that is known. All the data
that exists in the organ called the brain is in a memory bank. The
management module and the home of the consciousness are copied to
the inorganic platform, and there, they exist forever.”

“You mean like transferring all the data
into a computer?”

“Sort of. Among the transporters known as
humans, the ones named dark matter and dark energy form 95% of the
universe. The perceived and measured objects, such as stars,
planets, and the integral parts of living beings, such as light and
radio waves, are only a small part of the universe. They are like
the nail of an elephant, the only perceived part of a much larger
whole.”

“And we live in the level of this dark
substance and energy and copy ourselves?” I asked.

“Yes, sir. We live at the level where all
the components of the real universe are perceived, all the power
and dimensions, including quantum entanglement and gravity and the
relations among them. At our level, everything becomes clear.”

“It wasn’t very reasonable to live in a
human form with its 5% perceptibility.”

“Actually, if you account for the mere 5% of
data that is collected during the use and management of the human
body, their rate of perception becomes incredibly small,
approximately 2.5 per thousand.”

“Are we there, then?”

“The distances in space are vast, sir.
Actually, we are hundreds of light years away. What are sent here
are only small parts of reflections. Think of the quantum
entanglement principle.”

“Yes, I know its logic: as two particles
that interact with each other travel farther away from each other,
they share the same information independently, and a single effect
on one simultaneously affects the other.”

“Sir, the technology you use reflects this.
If you send entangled particles to a specific coordinate at light
speed, such as the limbo in the orbit of the Earth, a simultaneous
relationship occurs between the particles you have sent and the
half that stayed with you. Thanks to that, you can receive and send
data.”

“But why the Earth? Why do we go inside
humans and dominate them?”

“The distance is vast, and we are limited to
light speed. Compared to sending a space craft across a long
distance, sending a consciousness and using living forms at our
destination as avatars is far preferable. If the aim is to examine,
observe, and convey the experiences there, this is the one and only
way.”

“But why humans?”

“They are the only beings who have improved
enough storage modules that can collect information and make a
decision. Of course, it has taken a long time to eliminate the
incompatible ones from the gene pool in order to create a race with
the desired features. This is how the wild hunter and gatherer
communities from ten thousand years ago were thus tamed over
time.”

“So we are the reason for all those wars,
diseases, and death? It was all to bring about the taming of quiet,
strong, and fast horses that can carry us on their backs without
throwing us off, like breeding sheep that produce more milk, meat,
and wool?”

“Correct logic, sir.”

“Are all the living humans used and managed
by us?”

“Almost, sir. There are some human
communities trying to live untamed. You leave them to protect
nature.”

“Does that mean that all the earth’s known
civilization, the products of thought, the art work, I mean…these
are all masterpieces of ours? Have we created all of this?”

“Before you arrived, the wild humans used to
live eating carcasses, raw meat, tree leaves, and roots, and if you
hadn’t come, they would still be doing the same. Like monkeys, they
would only have stones to hunt their prey and smash their fruit.
But now, a species that struggled to survive for half a million
years can travel by plane, exchange data on the internet, and use a
lot of devices they don’t fully understand. Leaving a wild animal
on its own and waiting for it to invent the microwave would take us
beyond the lifespan of the universe. It is more likely for sand
particles blowing in the desert to fall to the ground and build the
Eiffel Tower.”

“What about religion? The holy books?”

“That is a really interesting subject, sir.
Actually, all the holy books and religions arose not from us but
from the primitive humans we manage. Maybe that’s why you can’t
understand it. Also, we still haven’t found the entity that tries
so hard to be in touch with them. The one they call ‘God;’ their
perception window is just too narrow.

“What is stranger yet is that the holy book
says you will go through ‘iron obstacles’ and attack humanity in
raids, as in the stories of Yecuc and Mecuc or Gog and Magog. It
says there is a layer of iron sand which must be overcome to reach
the Earth once every five thousand years. The calendar of the
Mayans and of the planet Marduc of the Sumerians predicts the
period when our sphere of influence gets stronger and we can
directly reach the Earth.”

“Actually,” I jumped in, “the same belief
says Yecuc and Mecuc/Gog and Magog get defeated. The book says that
something like the Dabbat al-Ard, or the Beast of the Earth, will
cause it.”

“Yes, strangely enough, it seems like what
has been predicted will occur. A bacteria in the camel’s saliva has
evolved in Medina, where the plague didn’t visit. It has been
spreading to tame humans all over the world. It is a kind of
disease which ends with the loss of brain control.”

“You mean a microorganism will release the
human beings under our control?”

“Yes, it prevents us from effective
administration. There is damage in the data that has been
transferred during each life you experience. That’s why the program
we use to get back your old abilities doesn’t always work properly,
and…”

“And?”

“And, it is unsuccessful from time to
time.”

“What do you mean? I’ve come back complete,
without any damage, haven’t I?”

“Well, yes. You don’t have any
problems.”

“If what the holy books say is true,
then the
Dajjal
( Antichrist
) will come, there will be wars, and the end of the Earth will
occur, right?”

“Humans are about to be free, and they will
try to live under their own will.”

“But, you have said that they can’t produce
anything on their own. Their genes have been modified to only serve
us. What will they do when they are free? It’s like setting tamed
sheep free into nature. They either fall prey to predators or they
vanish. Human beings would only survive for two days without the
homes, clothes, and food they’re used to.”

“That is true in theory, according to the
experiments we carried out on other animals. The continuation of
such species, whose genes have been modified, seems impossible, but
of course, that is not certain.”

“I want to fight for the Earth! I won’t let
all our effort and labor be wasted by such a disease. I have to
regain the people’s trust. Otherwise, they will all vanish without
our protection. The intelligent ones will understand me and join
us, won’t they?”

“You won’t let your sheep be
unprotected.”

“Of course not.”

“’
Who will be the shepherd’ like it
says in the Bible?”

“What does that mean?”

“Just brainstorming, sir, sorry. It is odd
that everything has happened as predicted. If you go down onto the
Earth and try to convince people, maybe as Dajjal, as it has been
described…”

“Consciousness and knowledge brings
responsibility. Although it is called Dajjal and seems bad, I won’t
let the people end up in the arms of the disease. I will find a way
to heal them and try to convince them that I do it for their own
good. But, if it doesn’t work, I will fight.”

“Like taking a sheep back to the flock
before it falls prey to the wolf, then keeping it in the barn and
butchering and eating it in the fall.”

“Maybe so, if you look at it with plain
logic, but I will do it to help them live on and make them better.
Whatever the motive, isn’t the result more important?”

“I am just a program you designed, sir. How
would I dare judge you?”

“The invasion of humanity and the Earth
happened a long time ago. If fighting is necessary to protect what
we achieved, then it is inevitable. Yes, start the preparations and
send me back to Earth, as Dajjal, if necessary.”