Safari Moon (23 page)

“Robert isn’t like you.”

Solo looked as if he wanted to laugh at her
comment but he didn’t. He only looked more stern and more harsh.
“You underestimate him.”

“Nothing will happen. The bed is yours.”

Solo pulled her hands away from his chest
suddenly leaving her isolated and alone. Before she could protest,
he was on the opposite side of the room. “If we end up in that bed
together, I’ll make love to you. You know the truth and so do
I.”

“Your opinion of yourself is overrated,” she
told him. “Do you think you’re so hot and so perfect that poor fool
that I am I can’t resist you?”

“It’s not you I’m worried about,” he said
savagely, and she could tell he’d reached the end of his
patience--his control. “I can’t keep my hands off you. Now that’s
the truth. Do you understand or do I have to spell my dilemma out
word for word. I’ve never felt so helpless in my entire life. I
can’t lie in that bed next to you and dream of touching you and
hearing the sweet little noises you make in your sleep, while I can
smell the soft fragrance that envelopes you. I can’t. I won’t.”

Nyssa couldn’t believe what she heard, what
Solo admitted.

She didn’t move while he turned off the
lights. She heard the sound of his shoes as they dropped on the
floor, his pants, his shirt.

Stunned, she listened when he pulled up the
covers he’d thrown on the rug and pounded the pillow--twice. She
wanted to argue with him, tell him what--that he was an idiot for
sleeping on the floor. Tell him that nothing he said held any
truth. Yet the thought that maybe he couldn’t keep his hands off
her and he respected her so much he was willing to sleep on the
floor rather than compromise her, did her ego a world of good.

On the other hand, this could be logically
contributed to pure lust. He hadn’t been with a woman in several
weeks and she was here, available and this time, unlike the other
times she’d gone on adventures with him, for some reason she turned
him on.

This was very confusing. Somehow she wanted
to contribute these strange occurrences to Solo’s Y chromosome.
Because he missed some key ingredients in this decision making
process he was going through, and there was nothing else to credit
the phenomena to except the missing DNA.

So why did she care if his reasoning was
faulty, and why did she want to give up her carefully laid plans?
The way she felt right now at this moment--and if she had an ounce
of courage--she’d make Solo come to bed with her and let him show
her how much he really wanted her.

***

“Is there a party out there?” Nyssa
asked.

But Solo was still asleep on the floor and
with all the noise generated in the other room, he couldn’t have
heard her if she’d yelled the question.

“Solo. Solo--”

Solo sat up from his place on the floor and
raked his hand through his wild hair until it stood on end. All she
could see of him was his well-muscled back from the waist up. He
stretched and his biceps and deltoids bulged just the right amount
to make her insides flutter.

“Sounds like the Colonel is back.” Solo was
on his feet and wrapping the quilt around his middle very adeptly,
a move he’d improved on in the last two days. His eyes had dark
purple shadows beneath them, and a flash of guilt swept through her
only to dissipate with his next statement. “Rise and shine,
pumpkin, we’ve a show to put on.”

The days had passed slowly and the tension
escalated with each hour. But Nyssa was used to the fact that her
honeymoon would be spent with a chaperone and one body guard. Both
Sarah and Robert had been underfoot and in the middle of every
conversation she and Solo had had. And to make matters worse Solo
had to postpone the shoot because of Sarah’s expectations. For
several hours each afternoon, Sarah shooed them into the bedroom, a
hopeful grin on her face and they were obliged to pretend they were
enamored of each other. By this time next month, Sarah would wonder
why there wasn’t an announcement of a baby forthcoming.

The strangest thing about the last two days
however was Sarah’s apparent good health. She was--chipper--if that
could explain her bubbling enthusiasm and her spry chatter that
went along with each meal. Each time Sarah shooed them to the
bedroom to “do what newlyweds did” she also took Robert by the arm
and made him walk with her. This served to reinforce Robert’s
opinion that Sarah faked the illness, faked the hospital stay, and
had staged the entire engagement and wedding for the sole purpose
of bringing Solo and Nyssa together.

Nyssa understood she would have to talk to
Robert soon, knew he felt betrayed in the worst possible way. For
the last twenty-four hours he’d lost all semblance of control, and
acted completely out of character. Old Robert had an attitude
problem.

Of course this didn’t ease the tension that
engulfed them. The truth, heaven forbid, could set back all the
carefully constructed plans from the last few weeks.

She decided there was no better time than
the present to speak with Robert. So, mustering all the courage she
could find, she dressed and set out to find her fiancé and whisk
him away to a nice private location for a serious talk.

The living room full of people turned in
unison and stared at her when she opened the bedroom door. Robert
rose from the couch and said, “Nyssa, we have to talk.”

“I know.” Nyssa started for the porch and
was relieved to hear Robert behind her. She walked until they were
far enough away from the cabin she was sure no one could hear
them.

“What you’ve done is noble and honorable and
while I admire you for it and while I can forgive you, I--”

He was perfect again, wonderful and she felt
lower than low. “I’m so sorry. You shouldn’t have had to go through
this.”

He touched her nose with his finger and gave
her a sad smile. “No, I shouldn’t have and I know you’re
sorry.”

What was he about to do? He didn’t look
right, didn’t look demanding or domineering nor did he look
possessive or jealous. “I never thought we’d have to get married or
that Sarah would stay and--” She wrung her hands and wished she
didn’t have to go through with this. “I’ve hurt you and I wish I
could change what happened.”

He lifted her chin so that short of closing
her eyes, she had to look at him. “I think--I think you knew what
you were doing all along. I think, even if it was only your
subconscious that led you, you wanted to marry Solo.”

“That’s not true.” Her denial was weak and
wavered with every word because Robert was right.

“Of course it is.” He smiled fondly at her.
“Deep down you know I’m speaking the truth. This hasn’t just been
for Solo’s grandmother. If I hadn’t seen you and Solo together with
my own eyes, I might not have believed what I saw. You love him,”
Robert said softly.

“I like him--some of the time. I’ve always
been attracted to him but he’s not my type.”

“Perhaps you’ve both grown up and maybe you
see each other in a different light. But from what I’ve noticed
around here sparks fly between the two of you.”

“You’re wrong.”

“I don’t think so. I’d be a fool to marry
you now that I know you love someone else.”

She was stunned. “You don’t want me?”

“Oh, I want you but what I feel doesn’t
matter,” he said sternly. “I’m leaving with the Colonel and Sarah.
The plane to fly us out of here sits on that make-shift runway
right now.”

“Oh.”

“Nyssa? Do you understand what I’ve told
you?”

“The plane is ready. The Colonel and Sarah
will leave, too. And when Solo and I are done with the pictures,
I’ll come home.”

Robert put his hands on her shoulders and
shook his head.

“The engagement is off?” she said. “I
understand now. You can’t forgive me.”

“That is part of what I said but not the
most important part. If you still loved me, I’d forgive you in a
heartbeat. But more important Nyssa is the fact you’ve done nothing
I need to forgive you for. You’ve followed your heart, that’s
all.”

“I have?”

“Yes.” His yes was emphatic yet wistful too,
maybe resigned. This wasn’t at all what she expected.

“My heart.”

“Follow it sweetheart and you’ll find
happiness.” He left her and walked back to the cabin.

His words whirled around in her brain, and
she still hadn’t figured out what the truth was. In love? In love
with Solo St. John? She always had been in love with him.

Yet…

***

When she opened the door to the living room
that night, moonlight flooded the walls and the floor. She hadn’t
been able to sleep, what Robert told her earlier in the day pounded
in her head. The need to talk to Solo was real and threatening, and
she didn’t have a clue as to what to say.

So when she stepped closer to the couch, a
softer version of the floor he’d been sharing for the past few
days, she found no relief. If courage was the commodity she was
after, she didn’t possess it nor was she any closer to finding
it.

Enlightened to the fact she didn’t have the
nerve to confront Solo let alone talk to him, she turned to go back
to the bedroom.

“Nyssa is that you?”

A shadowy figure sat up from the couch and
brushed his hair back but she couldn’t see his face or his eyes,
couldn’t read his expression. He sounded a bit angry or perhaps
frustrated. The last few days hadn’t been easy on him either.

“I wanted to know if you were asleep.”

“You wanted to know what?”

“Well, I miss you and this can’t be any
better than the floor. I--”

“If you’re asking me to come to bed with
you, I won’t. Now go to sleep and quit bothering me.”

Her heart sunk and her insides felt hollow
as all get out. Robert may have been right when he assumed she
loved Solo, but Solo didn’t love her. She wasn’t his kind of woman.
They both knew that. Why else would he refuse such a blatant
invitation?

“Good night, Nyssa.”

She saw him pull the covers over his face
punctuating the harsh good night he’d given her. If she walked up
to him and pulled the quilt off his face then proceeded to tell him
she wanted nothing more than to go on one adventure after another
with him, what would he do?

Chapter Twelve

A shaft of light filtered through the window
and cast the room in a curious glow. A tree branch scraped against
the roof, not that Solo needed the noise to wake him. Since he’d
tossed the pillow on the couch an hour before midnight, he’d been
wide awake and alert to every sound emanating from the bedroom
where Nyssa slept.

Somehow, over the last few days, he’d grown
accustomed to the little noises she made in her sleep, to the
company she provided though she slept on the bed and he lay on the
floor. Now he was alone and although he was used to the solitary
state, he had come to discover he liked having Nyssa close.

“Are you asleep?”

Solo opened his eyes, stunned that Nyssa
knelt beside the couch, her presence so close to him he could touch
her.

Her drowsy words made him smile. She sat
back on her legs then brushed his cheek with the back of her
hand.

“Nyssa--” He wanted her to lie down with
him.

“What?” Her hand rested on his chest. “When
will you leave?”

He squeezed her hand in his own. “In a few
hours. I have to finish the shoot and I’ve only two days left. The
Colonel and Sarah--”

“Don’t forget Robert.”

“Robert, yes, I couldn’t forget him. They
put a stop to my work. I’m behind schedule and I’ll have to call
the magazine--let them know the pictures will arrive ASAP.

“Will you take me with you?”

“If you still want to go.” He turned on his
side and laid an arm around her, very carefully, unwilling to make
a false move and frighten her away.

She was his wife, for God’s sake. There
wasn’t a soul in the world that would condemn him if he lowered his
mouth to hers, if he pulled her beneath him and made love to
her--to his wife.

No one would think twice, or say a word,
except Nyssa.

“Sweetheart.” He wrapped his hands around
the back of her head and pulled her closer. He needed to hold her
very badly. He needed to touch her and kiss her, and let her know
how he felt. Because she still meant to wed Robert. “Nyssa?”

And then his alarm went off.

She stiffened and pushed away from him as if
she understood what he’d intended from the moment she walked into
the room and asked if he was asleep.

“You were going to leave without me.”

Solo sat up and switched the light on.
“Yes.” Though he’d answered her truthfully, he shouldn’t have. With
that single word the look on her face became shuttered and cold.
Too late, “I didn’t think you wanted to spend the last few days in
a tent.”