Running Northwest (56 page)

It had been a long few months since she left Oregon, with so many things there left unknown. She had kept in constant contact with Ann and her friends since she left. Phone calls were exchanged; emails, handwritten letters and postcards came sometimes twice a week. Some kept her up on news from the coast; others were continuations of conversations and occasionally news on Thomas usually from Ann or Pockets. In August she received a letter from Derrick apologizing for his outburst that night at the Riptide, it surprised her…she was not ready to reply however.

The man passed some papers to her that she looked over briefly. She would take them home, give them a look over, sign them and return them to his office the next day. Karen was shocked when Stephanie had told her about her decision earlier that week. She was hurt a little, but that was Karen’s problem not hers to worry about, her friend would adjust.

Nothing was set in stone yet; dates were not firm but Stephanie had made her choice. She was taking a chance…a big chance; making a big change, but she needed to, it was time to stop being afraid. The following weeks began to move by quickly.

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The weather began turning cooler as the weeks wore on into early fall and it was mid-October now. The temperatures at night dipped, the wind was brisker and more forceful, and rain began to fall more and more often; winter would be here shortly. Winter on the coast was different from what Thomas has grown up with in Michigan. There was more rain and little snow at the base of the mountains. For as much as he like the busy summer season, he loved fall and winter on the Oregon Coast. There were less people, things were calmer and it seemed like things moved at a more natural pace. At higher elevations, they were getting flecks of color in the trees already; ocean migrations heading south were going on. The fall Chinook fishing season was also well under way on the coast. Fishing boats dotted the coastal waters and the docks around Tillamook Bay and others up and down the coast were chaotic but organized, busy with constant activity and people making a living.

The temperature was hovering above fifty degree but the wind made it feel ten degrees colder, Thomas loved it. It was a little after two in the afternoon in the middle of week. He stood on his deck, staring out at the blue ocean that was in turmoil, his favorite black pea coat and a light sweater keeping him warm. He thought about her, thought about what she was doing, wondering what she was thinking…curious if she was thinking about him or let it all go. He worked that morning; work took his mind off a lot these days. He came home to pick up the dogs before he went and got Daniel from school, they would take them to the beach later on, perhaps Cape Lookout, or maybe somewhere different.

Layla was running down on the beach chasing sea birds, he smiled as he watched the young dog run about the sand, water splashing, tongue hanging out and ears flopping. Harley sat close to Thomas, the colder weather was hard on her old bones and joints, it was something her and Thomas had in common they both had to get used to it. He reached down and rubbed the top of her head, and then her ears as their heads went back and forth watch Layla run. Eventually the younger dog made her way back up from the ocean’s edge and went inside and drunk from her water bowl.

The weather was cooler, bugs were sparse so when possible Thomas left most of the window
s
wide open, to get the smell of nature in his house. Derrick stopped by the coffee shop for lunch, they talked business, family and chit chatted about whatever came to them. Derrick and Erin seemed to have worked things out and his friend apparently was out of whatever funk he had been in. Thomas never was able to get Derrick to tell him what caused the issues a few months back, but he let it go. It was obvious it was something that was better left between Derrick and his fiancée.

He sat down in a chair and lit a cigarette, put one leg over the other. From inside the house he could hear a song by the singer Tony Bennett playing on the stereo.
The song was from one his mix CD
’s that he played when
it was just him when he was in
certain moods.
Harley walked inside, leaving Thomas outside alone, she jumped on the couch with Layla who licked the older dogs ears intently. A ri
ng of smoke blew out of Thomas’
mouth as he exhaled his cigarette. He liked times like this, when he could just relax and think with no interference. Things with Tracie since there breakup had improved after hitting a rough patch once Thomas was around the coffee shop again every day. She had been seeing a new guy – he was around her own age. Her new boyfriend seemed nice enough even for being young. However once he found out Tracie and Thomas had dated he became nervous around Thomas. Tracie seemed happy though and that was all that mattered to Thomas. After a
while,
he looked down at his phone and realized it would soon be time to pick up Daniel from school. They had plans to go to a restaurant east of Tillamook set more into the mountains. The place looked like a log cabin from the outside, it had old logging equipment around to look at and Daniel enjoyed it. Thomas on the other hand enjoyed the drive this time of year, with the fall bearing down the scenery was changing at a steady pace.

The coastal mountains had many hiking trails groomed or not zigzagging their way through them. Thomas and Daniel decided to bring Harley and Layla with them and take a small hike before they ate dinner. Thomas wanted to make sure they were home early enough for Daniel to get his homework done. Thomas loaded the dogs into the truck and headed into town. He would get there just before his son was walking out the door. On the way south towards
town,
his mind again wandered off to Stephanie. It was making him angry because he did not want to hope too much that he would ever see her again. He was close, a breath away from the woman he had loved for many years and he missed his shot.

He wondered if that was fates way of saying he should really let go of her and the past they shared. And forget about the possibility of a future. He thought about things realistically also however, she lived in Michigan a place he would only visit. He lived in Oregon, owned two bu
sinesses
and had a son that he loved and they had a good life. How would or could a relationship, a meaningful one ever wo
rk with that kind of distance
between them. It could not and he knew that. Thomas rubbed his face, growled at himself, and forced himself to push the thoughts of her away for now and maybe longer. He was too old to be caught up in romantic fantasies and enchanted by ghosts of his heart, but no matter how hard he tried, it would never go away…she never would.

The trees whipped past her in blurs as she drove; Shadow was sitting in the passenger seat next to her looking out the window intrigued by the things going past she had never seen. Stephanie looked in her review mirror as passing through the outskirts of another small town in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula. The past few weeks had gone by faster than she expected them to go. Her house had sold sooner than she thought it would, bought by a young couple that paid entirely too much for it. She spent from the day she signed the papers to put her home up for sale to a week before now, nearly a month selling, throwing away or donating anything she did not want to keep. She sold her house with most of the furniture and all the appliances with it.

Her bed and nearly everything else she decided to keep were on a moving truck that should be on its way to her new home she was renting, in her new town. She had with her in her SUV a few boxes of very important belongings; clothes for the trip, food and a big pillow on the back seat for Shadow. After making her choice, she began planning as much as she could for the move, at first dealing with realtors and then getting an offer to rent a small ocean front cottage on a
long-term
basis. She already knew she would love the house, since she had already been there.

Karen did not take the moving news well but understood. She was sad her friend was moving away. Karen had her kids and her husband; she was tied to Michigan. Stephanie was not. Life in Michigan was not the life Stephanie chose for herself. Stephanie’s own family was surprised and oddly upset which she did not understand since she rarely saw them anyway, even though she lived near them. She wanted and needed a fresh start among other things and she knew where she wanted to go for that. She had finally found a place where she felt happy…even whole. Moreover, if that ended up being where she spent the rest of her life and grew old, she would be okay with that. The other situations, the unknowns about what would happen when she got there and after would be answered soon enough. The trees around her were a mish mash or green, oranges, reds and yellows. She always loved the upper peninsula in the fall, it was why she decided to take this way leaving Michigan; it was a nice send off.

She reached over petted Shadow’s furry mane; the dog began wagging her tail with approval. Shadow then stood up and licked the side of her owners face. Stephanie smiled, laughed, and said, “Baby girl you can’t be doing that all the way to Oregon”. The dog wagged her tail even faster when Stephanie spoke to her. Thomas had always told her this drive along Highway 2 was the best drive going west, he always took it weather permitting. She knew she might hit some snow in Montana when she came to the mountains but was not concerned.

The two of them were going to take their time getting out there, they were not in a hurry, this was literally the first adventure they had been on together and Stephanie wanted to enjoy it. She planned to take five days to reach the coast. Ann, Beth and the rest of them were excited to see her again, excited to have her back on the coast permanently; Ann especially was ecstatic. Beth and Jack were more than willing to give Stephanie an amazing deal on renting the cottage for as long as she wanted. Since the offer, she had wondered if that had been their plan or at the very
least,
the
ir
hope
all along
, that Stephanie would come back to Oregon.
If they had planned to offer their cottage
to her
at that low of a rent
all along. W
hen
she knew
they could easily get two or three times that amount, Stephanie did not argue though.
They all wanted Stephanie to be happy and all wanted her back in their lives.

They also were hopeful other aspects of her life would work out in her favor but only time would tell on that. Stephanie had no idea Thomas knew she had been out on the coast, and knew eventually she would see him, she wanted too, seeing him still made her nervous. However, according to Ann
,
Thomas had been talking about her more and more these last few months.

Karen asked Stephanie if she was moving there on the off chance she and Thomas might be able to try again to be closer to him even though the two had not talked on Stephanie’s visit. To a large degree, she was not, but she loved Thomas and knew if they did have a chance, any chance at all of trying again her being on the same coast would make things easier.
Nevertheless,
more than anything, she felt good about herself being out there…after everything she has gone through she needed and deserved to be happy.
That really is why she going out there, to be happy
and
to feel whole again.

A short while later she passed a sign that said entering Wisconsin, heading toward Duluth. She was excited and soon she would be in Minnesota and then even farther. She stopped at a rest stop along a winding creek surrounded by colorful trees. When she stepped out of her SUV the breeze was brisk and hit her but the air smelled like fall, that scent of dying leaves and a hint of a fire or burning leaves somewhere near. Shadow sniffed and smelled her way around, curious about all these new smells. Stephanie sat at a bench and watched her dog with a big smile on her face.
This was just the start and
a
new beginning to a completely new life for them both.
She wondered what the road ahead would bring and what new things she would see on her way to Oregon. She could not wait to see Shadow in the ocean for the first time, to see her running on the huge beaches without breaking rules.

After walking around for a while and stretching their legs at the roadside park, they got
back in to her
vehicle and headed back down the road. She had never driving west, and she imagined what things were like in between what she had known her whole life and what she found on the Pacific. Thomas used to tell her about North Dakota and Montana, Idaho the things he saw while driving across them when he went traveled. Now she would see for herself, she thought about what it would look like when the Rocky Mountains were finally in view. She imagined the view as she drove through them thousands of feet in the air, snow on the sides of the road, the possibility of seeing a moose, bear or other animal.

As she drove she thought about Thomas driving this road back to Oregon all those years ago, just he and Harley. She wondered what was going through his mind as he drove west back then, what he thought about her and his life. Where his life was going, where he wanted it to go…if he thought he could ever be happy again. Thomas always had an amazing knack of being able to just walk away from people, lives and connections, to completely put something or someone out of his mind to a large degree for the sake of moving on and forward. While Stephanie was thinking about this, she again felt bad she pushed Thomas into this, into going back out west. She felt bet bad that she had hurt him so much where he felt as if he had to leave like that and just up and go.