Authors: Tia Siren
“You don’t have to keep apologizing. It isn’t your fault. I’ve just been very stupid” I said and took another sip of my milkshake. He had turned to look at me and I caught his eyes, unwavering and strong. I don’t know where I had suddenly developed the strength to stare into his eyes and not worry about blushing.
“If you say so. But I don’t know why you think you were stupid. I thought we had a great time together”, he said and I watched as his red lips moved. I was drowning in his bright blue eyes and I didn’t care anymore.
“I don’t know either why I feel that way. I guess I just wanted an adventure and not have to worry about it. You know? Just get on with my life” I said and tore away from his gaze finally.
“Well, you still can. It’s not like I’ll stalk you forever” he said and I didn’t reply. I knew he was right but I didn’t know why I still felt like it had been a mistake. He had been nothing but charming and kind to me from the moment we had met.
“Is it because you’re feeling things that you didn’t expect a one-night-stand to make you feel?” he asked softly. His words came out in dribbles, shaking my world as I remained silent and chose to hang my head low. I concentrated on my leather boots instead.
“Because that is how I feel” Marvin said and I jerked my head up to look at him. I didn’t expect him to confess his feelings. I didn’t even know he had feelings!
“Yes” I said finally and blushed a bright red. Marvin smiled but looked away nonetheless.
“I knew we had a connection. I knew you were going to be more than just an adventurous drunken fling” I heard him say slowly.
“But I don’t want to feel this way” I said pleadingly. I was embarrassed by my own voice and my heart stopped beating when he moved himself closer to me. Our thighs were grazing now and he crept his hand over to mine, the one that was lying on my side. He engulfed my hand in his own big palms and I shut my eyes tight and looked away from him.
“It won’t be a disaster if you don't treat it like one” he said after a few minutes. Our hands were locked together, and I cold smell his cologne and my senses were reeling.
“You’re going to be gone in six months. This time you will actually be gone” I said, I could feel tears pricking my eyelids and I felt stupid. I couldn’t believe that the situation was making me cry. My hands were in his and all it did was break my heart.
“It doesn’t mean that it has to end what we can possibly build in six months. That is a lot of time” he said. He had leaned in closer to my ear and I could feel his breath on my cheek. I was so close to kissing him, but I was more interested in the words that were coming out of his mouth.
“What do you mean? How is it going to work if we are in two different continents Marvin?” I asked him, meeting his eyes daringly even though I could feel the pool of water around my eyes.
“We aren’t captives. We can decide what we want to do and where we want to do it. Nobody and nothing is holding me back in England for starters” he said hurriedly. I could see him trying to convince me with his words. In that moment all I wanted to do was throw my arms around his neck and bury my face in his chest.
“I like the sound of that” I finally managed to give him a smile and he smiled widely back at me.
“Good” he said and he didn’t ask permission, he just leaned in and bit my lower lip. Just when he was pulling away I grasped his neck with my hand and pulled him to me again, kissing him with a new found passion and hope. Marvin turned his body to face mine and pressed up closer to me. Even though we had layers of clothing between us I could feel the growing heat emanating from his body.
He broke away from me suddenly and laughed, just as he had done that first night at the end of the Tower Bridge. “You really know how to surprise me Amber” he said through his laughs and I couldn’t help but join him in laughter.
“I could say the same about you Marvin” I said when I managed to stop.
“Marvin. That name sounds good in your mouth” he said just before pulling me to him again and kissing my throat.
****
THE END
Good people are hard to find, and sometimes you have to rely on
bad
people to get the job done. I
was used
to dealing with
bad
people. Jimmy wasn’t the worst, though. I had
been used
to much worse in my youth and I swore I’d never go back.
“Come on man, how much further,” I asked in a whisper.
He leaned around the corner of the alleyway.
“This is it, I think,” he replied.
When you’re desperate, you do a lot of dumb things. The
dumb
thing I was
doing, this time,
involved Jimmy, some dealers and a whole lot of drugs I had stashed in my jacket.
“Okay, just wait here. They don’t know I brought you, so don’t come out unless I say it’s safe. If this works out you’ll make an easy two-large,” he said.
I nodded and leaned against the wall. I just wanted this to
be done
so I could go home and relax. None of this would have been a problem if I hadn’t decided to quit my job. And, I probably wouldn’t have quit if my boss knew how to keep his hands to himself. Now I’m stuck with college tuition that I can’t afford.
Jimmy strode out from the alleyway, confidently. I was surprised he was able to muster up much of anything in this situation. I couldn’t stay my curiosity about where we were so I peeked around the corner as Jimmy had done.
I looked out to a loading dock, not particularly big, but large enough to fit a pair of small trucks inside. A few large men were standing around in the dim light that exuded from the dock interior, looking as intimidating as possible.
I wanted to laugh at how silly boys acted when they did things that some would consider illegal. They always seem to puff up their chest and show off their small muscles. If only they’d seen what I had seen in the past, they’d know what a real man
looks like
.
There I went again, thinking to myself about people I swore I’d never think about again. Like a splinter stuck in my mind, I always felt the need to pick at it. Some people are like that, too. You think you’ve managed to forget about
them,
but they’ll always come back, and usually it’s harder to forget them the second time.
I heard their voices echo in the darkness; another thing that boys liked to do when trying to sound tough, they always like to speak loud with deep voices. I smacked my head against the wall to stop thinking about it, and that just gave me a headache.
“Jimmy, what the hell are you
doin’
here,” I heard from the tallest of the bunch, “you shoulda been here a while back. You’re late.”
“I …er … got your stuff,” he said, “I know it’s
late,
but I thought you might be able to make an exception this time?”
I could hear the trepidation in his voice. His
cool
exterior had already
melted,
and he was back to being the timid guy I always knew.
“Yeah? Then where is it?” replied the man with a sigh.
“It’s nearby,” Jimmy replied with a cracked voice, “I wanted to see the money first.”
The tall man cracked his knuckles and stared at Jimmy for a second, but then walked back inside. The silence was almost too much to bear for the few moments the man was gone, but then his footsteps echoed into the night again as he strode back
onto
the dock. I could barely make out a small envelope in his hand.
“Where’s my stuff?” he asked again.
Jimmy smiled and motioned for me to come and join him, so I took a deep breath to center myself. I could feel my heart beating in my ears as I stepped out from behind the corner.
“Show them, Celia,” Jimmy said.
I reached into my purse and pulled out the bag he’d given me earlier and held it up. One of the brutes waddled over to me and grabbed the parcel, taking it to the man in charge.
I could make out the man’s face a little better now. I didn’t recognize it, but he looked chiseled and eastern European. The man in charge turned to me and smiled. It felt like he was eyeing me up. I didn’t like it in the slightest.
He held out the
envelope,
and the same brute from before took it and handed it to me.
I stayed silent as Jimmy took the envelope out of my hand and started counting the money. After a
second,
he turned to me and nodded.
“Let me give you guys a ride, wherever you want to go,” said the
rich
stranger.
“Whatever you say, Mr. Novak,” Jimmy said, hastily stuffing the envelope in his jacket pocket.
Mr. Novak turned to his phone and said something I couldn’t make out. Then a car pulled down the alley and toward the dock, but it wasn’t any car, it was a police car.
I started hyperventilating, worried that I was about to end up in jail. Mr. Novak didn’t look worried in the slightest; Jimmy looked about as confident as I did.
Mr. Novak started laughing.
“Don’t worry about
them; they
’re your ride.”
The two officers stepped from the car, one of them held a phone that looked similar to Mr. Novak’s. Nothing they could say would have removed my worry
completely,
but I sighed to give myself a little bit of relief. Mr. Novak must be worth a lot of money to be able to buy off the police.
Jimmy and I walked hastily over to the police that
were
already opening up the back doors. I ducked my head down and leaned in, not the first time I had been in the back of a police car, and I
really
hoped it would be my last.
Jimmy pulled out the envelope and stuffed it into my purse. I looked at him quizzically and in
response,
he shushed me.
“Where to?” the cops asked.
“4
th
and
Jefferson,
” Jimmy replied.
The driver
nodded,
and we started to drive. It wasn’t a far destination but it was decently close to
home,
and I needed a shower and some sleep to calm my nerves.
The police continued to drive. I watched out the window as we drove straight past the destination. My heart started beating hard again.
“Hey, you just passed it,” I said.
They didn’t respond. We just kept driving. Before long we were out of the city and heading upstate. I was hoping they’d
stop,
but I knew they wouldn’t.
Almost an hour later they pulled over. The only
thing
I could see were trees and a single stretch of highway. I had a
really bad
feeling about this.
They cracked open the back door, guns drawn.
“Out,” they said.
I wanted to run, but there was nowhere to go. I followed their instructions but kept my eye out for an escape.
“Jimmy, you were a week late again. Mr. Novak doesn’t like dealing with people that aren’t on time with deliveries. Since he can’t just fire you, he is doing the next best thing.”
We marched through the forest for a few minutes before finding a hastily dug hole in the
forest
.
“It
’s too bad
you had to get her involved,” they added.
I wanted to break down and cry, but I knew now was the
worst
time.
This was
reminding me of a few times I was with my ex-boyfriend. I knew he’d done some things that were less than legal, and sometimes he would bring me along. I’d seen him beat people until they could barely breathe, and then his boys would just take the loser
away,
and I wouldn’t see him again.
The odd part; that wasn’t the reason I stopped seeing him.
“Get in,” the cops said, gesturing toward the hole. Jimmy acknowledged his fate and stepped into the hole. I, on the other hand, wasn’t in the mood to die tonight.
One of them waved his pistol at me, trying to usher me in the hole.
“Just get in, Celia. They’re probably just trying to scare us, right?”
Bang. Jimmy was dead. He slumped over in the hole, lifeless. I panicked and kicked the officer near me. He must not have had the best footing because he toppled over on top of Jimmy. It was my break, and I took it.
I sprinted through the forest towards the road we had just left. I could hear the officers starting to chase me from behind, but they were
a ways.
I
started
to consider my options. I remembered they had left their keys in the ignition before we left. Cops always did stupid things like that. So, I just kept running.
Their footsteps grew louder, and I could hear the brush cracking under their weight.
I could barely see a thing, but in the
heavy
moonlight,
I was able to make out the silhouette of their car. The lights were still on
inside
.
Then an arm reached out and grabbed my shoulder. I yelped in surprise.
“Stop right there, girlie,” he said.
I grabbed the thing nearest to me,
a stick,
and stabbed into his hand as hard as I could. He screamed in
anger,
and I heard him try to draw his gun with his other hand, but it clanked to the ground.
I sprinted the last distance, completely out of breath, running entirely on adrenaline, until I
was nestled
into the driver’s seat. I heard a smash on the passenger side door, the officer I stabbed was frantically trying to get in the car. I reached over and locked the door before he could open it.
I cranked the
key,
and the car started up.
“Get out of the car you bitch! I will find
you,
and I’ll do worse than shoot you,” he shouted.
I floored the pedal and the wheels burned out as I shot off in the darkness. I breathed my first
sight
of relief as I drove down the road. Finally, I gave in to all the emotions I had denied myself until now. Jimmy was dead; murdered by two officers. I couldn’t go to the
police; they
wouldn’t believe me. I couldn’t call any of my friends, the few that I had, they would just be put in harm’s way.
There was only one place I could think to go. The only place I ever really felt safe in my entire life. I had to go back
home; I
had to find Rex and get him to keep me alive.
2.
I ditched the cop car when it finally ran out of gas. It was a liability
anyway
, as I’d heard that their
cars
were easy to track, so it was for the best that I left it.
I had driven more than 200 miles last night, and I was exhausted. It didn’t help that blood was spilled all over my shirt. Some of it Jimmy’s and some of it was probably the officer that I stabbed.
I hitchhiked my way into a small town, didn’t seem to have much more than a gas station and a diner. That
was fine
though, people that live in parts like this are tougher than most. I let my guard down a little bit.
Rex and his boys liked to keep to the open road, and I hoped they’d be somewhere nearby.
At least,
I was 200 miles closer to the place I last saw him.
I pulled out my phone and dialed his number, only to get his voicemail.
“Don’t bother,” it said.
I was about to hang up, but I couldn’t help myself, I left a message.
“Rex, it’s me, Celia. I’m hunkered down in a diner called Jack’s Shake
Shack,
and I was hoping to see you again. I’m in a tight spot,” I started; then
I
realized the money in my bag, “I can pay you!”
The message clicked
off,
and I returned the phone to the receiver. I felt
completely
hopeless. I sat down at the café bar and rested my head in my hand. I laid my phone on the table in front of me and stared at it, hoping it would ring.
“Can I get you some pie?”
I looked up at the waitress holding a pot of coffee and leaning on the bar.
“How about a cup of that coffee to go with it,” I said.
She smiled and poured me a cup.
“
Waitin’
on somebody?” she asked.
“Something like that,” I replied.
She came back with a slice of pie. I pulled a few dollars from the envelope of cash, and as I did
so,
she held up her hand.