Rogue's Passion (26 page)

He twisted a paper towel in his hand. It must be the napkin he was going to give her but had forgotten. She grabbed a tissue from a box next to the computer and wiped a drop of syrup from her chin. She’d never seen him so unsure of himself. What had happened to him while he was away?

“It’s just that…I wasn’t sure I followed the directions right.”

“A little flour, baking soda, eggs, and milk?”
 

He kept twisting that paper towel and refused to look at her. Something else was going on. She thought about his shock when he noticed her watching him. Like he was pissed off she’d found him in the kitchen. Reading a cookbook, mouthing the words.
 

And then something occurred to her. Did she dare mention it?

“Ash?”

He looked up. The bruising behind his eyes was gone, replaced by a childlike innocence she’d never seen before.
 

She said a quick prayer that she was doing the right thing. “Can you…read?”

For an instant, he looked like an abused puppy about to get kicked, but then it disappeared. He dropped his gaze and a muscle in his jaw flexed as he tried to decide how to answer. When he spoke, she could barely hear him. “I can. A little. But sometimes the letters get turned around and I’m not sure what it says.”

Was Ash…dyslexic? Her best friend in school had been, so Olivia knew what some of the signs were. “Do letters seem to move around on the page when you try to read?”

He nodded but said nothing.
 

“Do you have trouble adding up money, or mix up your lefts and your rights?”

He still wouldn’t look at her. “Yeah, but not always. Usually when I’m in a hurry or stressed out.”
 

She exhaled slowly. That would explain why he couldn’t spell out his name for the investigators at the scene of the explosion. If any situation was high stress, that one had been.

Without warning, he tossed his plate onto her desk and stormed to the other side of the room. Dust motes floated in the air around him as he stared into the back parking lot. She was losing him. He was closing himself off to her when she desperately wanted in. One wrong word from her and he’d be out the door again.
 

“Ash,” she said softly. “I think you might be dyslexic.”

“Is that another name for stupid?”
 

Her heart tore from her chest. “No, you’re definitely not stupid.”

“Then what does it mean?” He turned to face her, his cheeks flushed, his eyes as dark as ebony and glistening with emotion. “I can’t think with my head, Liv.” He held a finger to his temple like a gun. “Everything becomes a jumbled mess in here. I’m only good at stuff I do with my hands. Fighting and building engines. That’s it.”
 

She came around the desk and approached him, taking care not to step on Conry’s tail. Ash tried to step away, but she grabbed his hands and jerked him toward her. Then she kissed his palms. “It just means you’re better with images and actions than you are with words and numbers. That’s it. Everyone learns and processes information differently. It definitely does not mean you’re stupid.” She remembered some of the challenges Helena had faced in school. The bullies. The name-calling. The snickers she got when she had to go to the learning center. Olivia gripped his hands tighter. Had Ash gone through something similar when he was growing up?
 

“If I ever hear anyone calling you stupid or even hinting that you’re anything less than amazing, they’ll be sorry. And that goes for you too,” she said, giving another little squeeze to emphasize her point. “And I’m not kidding, either.”
 

It looked as though he were trying not to smile, and the tension in his shoulders disappeared.
 

She told him about her friend, who was now a successful interior designer with her own business. But when Helena was younger, she struggled with some of the same issues. Olivia told him how she’d punched a kid on the playground for calling her friend a retard. “I got sent to the principal’s office for that one, but he never did it again.”
 

Without warning, Ash pulled her close, slamming her against his chest. His mouth crashed down against hers, stealing the breath from her lungs. His lips were everywhere, kissing her neck, her cheeks, the sensitive patch of skin behind her ear.
 

“How do you do this to me, Olivia? You’ve worked your way past all my defenses—defenses that I thought were iron strong. You’ve bared my soul and taken over my heart. How can you possibly think you know me better than I know myself?”
 

“Because I’m falling in love with you,” she said, the confession flying from her mouth.
 

A little sound came from his throat. Gripping her tighter, he held on as though he thought she might slip through his hands.
 

“What do you mean
think I know?
” She pulled away slightly. “You’re wrong if you don’t see yourself as I do, it’s as simple as that. You’re a passionate, fierce man who fights for what’s right, no matter the personal cost or consequence. You’re a champion of those without a voice.” He tried to protest, but she shut him down with a finger to his lips. “What goes on in a man’s head does not define his character, Ash. It’s your actions that make you who you are. Someone can think all they want about doing this or that, but until they do something—take action—their intentions mean nothing.” She poked his chest, right over his heart. Maybe a little too hard, because he winced. “It’s what’s in here that counts. I could give a rat’s ass if a
p
looks like a
d
to you. And anyone with half a brain would agree with me.”
 

“Olivia,” he rasped, as though he’d completely lost his voice. Dark passion flared in his eyes, making the tiny thong she wore suddenly wet. He hadn’t said he felt the same way she did, but then words weren’t his strong point—actions were. And that was all she needed for now. His gaze dropped to her mouth and his full lips parted. He was going to kiss the hell out of her and she was going to let him. She’d never had office sex before, but there was a first time for everything.

“Agree with what?” a deep voice said from behind.

She froze. They turned around to see Rand and one of the mechanics standing in the open doorway. Somehow neither of them had noticed that the noise from the garage had gotten louder.
 

Asher gave her a kiss that was entirely too quick, then let her go. “Olivia thinks she knows everything.”

“Thinks?” She sauntered back to her desk. “I know.”

Chapter Twenty-Three

The next few weeks flew by quickly. Olivia organized the opening weekend festivities at Reckless Motocross Park, and Asher went to Cascadia again. Not only did he need to appear before the
taghta
magistrates at Red Mountain, but he wanted to make sure his trail had gone cold for the Fixer. Then, when he least expected it, Asher and his team would track
him
down and kill him.
   

Since he didn’t want to be gone any longer than absolutely necessary, he came back through the portal as soon as the ceremony was over. He missed Olivia more than he thought possible, so having portal sickness was a small price to pay.

For hours, he lay on the cold stone floor of the antechamber, stomach churning, head throbbing. He vomited a few times. The next Iron Guild warrior to come through and see that would not be happy, but there was nothing he could do about it. Somehow, he made it back to Reckless, stopping the bike a few times along the way to be sick. Conry was excited to see him, turning around in circles as if he were a puppy. Olivia took one look at him and marched him straight to bed. When she laid her hands on him, healing energy swept through him and he fell asleep.
 

He awoke the next morning to see Olivia standing over him, a tray of food in her hands.
 

“Feeling better?” she asked, setting it down beside him on the bed.

He sat up on one elbow and did an inventory. Stomach ache gone. Headache gone. Muscle aches gone. “You…can heal iron sickness?”

She shrugged. “You tell me.”

“I feel great.” He grabbed a banana off the tray, peeled it, and stuffed it in his mouth. By all accounts, he should be as sick as Rickert had been in the hunting cabin. No one crossed back through the portal as soon as he had, because when you did, that was what happened. “And I’m starving.”

“Good thing I brought food then.” She brushed the hair out of his eyes. “So what plans do you have today?”

He yawned. “Nothing. I wasn’t expecting to feel well enough to do anything for the next few days.”

“Good. Because it’s Saturday, I don’t have to work, and my mom invited us to dinner tonight.”
 

* * *

The driver’s window on the Charger was stuck in the open position, sucking out any warm air inside. They hadn’t realized it wasn’t working until Olivia lowered it to adjust her mirror and it wouldn’t roll all the way back up. Asher was irritated with himself that he hadn’t thought to check it.

James had done a great job with the car in the body shop, and it was now sporting a new coat of metallic purple paint. Not a stock color by any stretch of the imagination, but Olivia said it was her favorite color, so that was good enough for Asher. Everything under the hood ran great, but damn it, he’d forgotten to check some of the little things.

Asher blew on his hands. Even though the heat was cranked, it was still damn cold inside. He’d take a look at it when they got to Granite Falls. See if he could get the damn thing up before they left to go back.
 

“My mom is going to be shocked when we show up early,” Olivia said, brushing the hair from her face.

“Why?”
 

“Because I’m usually late.”
 

“Then I must be a good influence.”

She gave a little smile. “Let’s just hope she sees it that way.”

Neither of them spoke for a few moments, both lost in their thoughts.
 

They’d made love in the shower this morning, then again on the bed. When he jokingly told her their sex slave arrangement had long ago expired, she replied that it was too late. She was hopelessly addicted to him and would require sex on a daily basis, if not more. She’d said this as she was straddling him, her expression serious and focused. He wasn’t about to argue because (1) he felt the same about her, and (2) she was a pain in the ass if she didn’t get her way. Gripping his cock like she owned it, she’d guided him to her center and slid gloriously down his length.
 

Asher shifted in the passenger seat and took a deep breath. It was time to tell her about Jenny.

“Olivia, there’s something you need to know.”

She glanced over at him. “Okay, I’m listening.”

“I…met this girl,” he began slowly, “on my first trip through the portal. She was dancing at a small club up north where I’d stopped for something to eat and drink after the mission was complete. I’d never seen anyone dance like that. Or heard that kind of music before. As I watched her, the sound seemed to be coming straight through the walls and into my skin. I kept looking for the musicians, thinking they were in another room, but of course, I never found them.”

Olivia laughed. “That must’ve been strange.”

“We got together that night and every time I came back through the portal. She wanted me to move to Las Vegas with her. She’d had a dance audition and got a callback. If that didn’t work out, she said there would be other opportunities. I had no choice but to tell her who I was and why I couldn’t go.”

“And how did she react to that news?”

“She knew all along that I wasn’t from the area, but she had no idea I was from Cascadia. It was shortly afterward that she found out she was pregnant.”

Olivia inhaled sharply. “Oh, Ash,” she said softly.
 

“The thought of being a father both terrified and thrilled me, as I’m sure it does all men when they learn that their seed has helped to create a new life.” A dull throbbing began to hammer at the back of his eyeballs, but he continued. “She wasn’t sure how she was going to be able to keep working. I told her I’d take care of her. One of my suggestions was for us to move to the other side of the portal. At least temporarily.”
 

“And what did she say?”
 

“Though she was scared, she was willing to consider it, but we never got that chance. The wind had been blowing in from Elliott Bay that night, cold and wet. The Montlake Bridge was up and everyone was waiting in their vehicles for it to close. What we’d thought was a routine bridge closure to allow a sailboat to pass turned out to be an army roadblock. Using spotlights and a megaphone, we were ordered out of our cars and told that a Cascadian assassin was among us. People panicked and started running. Jenny screamed at me and gave me a hard shove, saying either “go turn yourself in” or “don’t turn yourself in.” But before I could do anything or ask what she said, another shot rang out and…she was dead.”