Rocky Mountain Mayhem (11 page)

“Seriously. I heard a noise over by the trash
can and got to thinking about bears eating at night and that I
probably smelled yummy to them. After-sex smell, ya know?”

“Viv, bear sex probably smells a lot
different from human sex, so bears wouldn’t have been after you
because of that,” Lucy said. “They’d just eat you because you were
readily available, walking down the street in the middle of the
night.”

“That makes me feel so much better!”

“Speaking of death, to stall Eric, we asked
him about the accident at the hotel yesterday,” Wendy said. “Turns
out, they think that guy might have been murdered. Eric said the
room had been trashed and looked like there had been a
struggle.”

“How creepy. And it was on our floor,” Kate
said.

They went through the front entrance of the
hotel and Vivian couldn’t help but look toward where the guy had
fallen.

Getting on the elevator, Lucy asked, “Did you
find your bra at least?”

Vivian whipped it out of her purse and waved
it in the air. “Ta-da!”

This brought a barrage of laughter.

Back in the room, Vivian said, “I don’t know
about y’all, but I’m ready to get out of Aspen. I’ve had my fill of
this town for now.”

“I’m ready to get to Vail!” Kate said.

“Me, too!” Wendy said. “Let’s pack it up and
move it out.”

The girls packed, then called the bellman to
get their luggage. Vivian checked them out of the hotel while the
girls waited out front.

The reception clerk handed her an envelope
with a Yellow Aspen Hotel emblem on it. “This was left for Vivian
Taylor.”

Vivian glanced at it.
Great, probably Eric
leaving me a sweet note and his number. Blah
. She shoved it
into her purse.

She met the girls out front with the car,
which was already loaded up with the bellman’s help, and they
zoomed out of Aspen.

ON the drive to Vail, Lucy noticed a big
section of dead trees and explained the cause. “Pine beetle. It’s
devastating groves and groves of pine trees. It’s horrible.
Researchers are working to figure out how to get it under control,
but right now there’s not a lot that can be done.”

They rounded a bend on the downhill stretch.
The brake pedal didn’t feel quite right under Lucy’s foot. The road
flattened out and she dismissed it.

“I hope they figure out how to save the
trees,” Kate said.

“Yeah, apparently it takes something like six
straight days of below-freezing temperatures to kill the beetles.
We get cold weather, but we don’t stay below freezing for that
long.”

The road started descending again, and Lucy
tapped the brakes going around a bend. “My brakes feel funny,” she
said. The road straightened out, and she kept her foot off the
gas.

“What do you mean, funny?” Wendy asked.

“There’s less resistance on the pedal.” Lucy
tried again. “My foot is practically to the floor.”

“That’s not good,” Wendy said.

“They felt fine on the way here.”

“Pull over!” Kate said.

“Can’t until we get down the pass.” The
speedometer crept over 60, even though Lucy kept her foot on the
brake pedal.

“Try pumping them,” Wendy said, leaning over
the seat. “Build up pressure.”

They passed a 6 percent downhill grade sign.
Lucy rapidly pumped the brakes, but no response.

“Oh my god, we have no brakes!”

As the road quickly descended, the
speedometer zoomed past 80. Lucy swerved into the left lane to
avoid an RV that crept along in the right. The old man gave them a
dirty look as they flew past.

“I’m too young to die!” Kate wailed. “And I
might be pregnant!”

“Let’s not panic,” Wendy said, sounding a
little panicked. “Pump them again.”

Pump, pump pumppumppumppump.

“Nothing,” Lucy said but kept the pedal to
the floor anyway.

“We’re going way too fast!” Vivian said.

They soared past a couple of cars and an
18-wheeler and were rapidly approaching a blue and silver pickup
ahead.

“He’s gotta move,” Wendy said. “Honk!”

Lucy laid on the horn and flashed her lights.
The truck swerved out of the way with inches to spare.

“Ahhh! That was too close!” Vivian said,
gripping the oh-shit handle.

Reading the sign in front of her, Lucy
swerved into the right lane and clicked on the hazard lights.
“Buckle up!”

“Oh god, are we…?” Kate said, as Lucy drove
straight ahead rather than taking the bend in the road.

Lucy gripped the steering wheel, gaze
intense, barreling toward a runaway truck ramp. “Hang on,
ladies!”

They all screamed as the tires spewed gravel
as the SUV ran up the incline. Snow and slush flew everywhere,
covering the windshield as they careened halfway up the ramp. Lucy
mashed the emergency brake pedal and they jerked to a stop. “
Aye
carumba
!”

Vivian slapped her hands on the dashboard as
the momentum carried her forward, then slammed her back into her
seat. She blinked and stared through the windshield covered in
dirty snow, and up at the mountain looming before her.

“Holy fuckbuckets, Lucy. Good thinking.”

“Thank god. We’re alive!” Kate yelled.

“Jesus,” Wendy said and let out a sigh. “Way
to go, Danica Patrick.”

“I can’t believe it,” Lucy said, releasing
the wheel. “I finally got to experience a runaway truck ramp, not
just see it. They really work!”

“Amen to that!” Wendy said.

The snow surrounded the vehicle so the girls
had to shove on the doors to get them open. Vivian slipped on the
ice a little, before catching herself on Kate’s passenger door.
“Whoa! Looks like we’re going to need some help getting out of
here.”

“Do
you
need some help getting out of
here?” Kate asked.

Though Vivian’s knees were a little weak, she
wasn’t about to admit it. “Nope, I’m fine, but Big Bertha here
isn’t.” She slapped the roof. “And good grief this thing is filthy
now.”

Big Bertha was now covered in muddy
grime.

“Let’s just hope some 18-wheeler doesn’t fly
down the mountain and need this ramp right now.” Lucy blew out a
sigh and kicked at the bank of snow. “I guess we need a tow
truck.”

They walked down the ramp while Lucy called a
wrecker service. She gave their location and was told it’d be at
least 45 minutes.

“I need a drink,” Vivian said. “I’m gonna hit
the back seat bar. Anybody want anything?”

Everyone nodded, even Kate.

“I’ll come help you,” Wendy said.

A few minutes later, Vivian and Wendy walked
back down the ramp with four margaritas. “I mixed ’em up good,
ladies,” Wendy said. “Enjoy.”

They found a few boulders and sat down,
drinking their margaritas while they waited. It ended up being a
two-margarita wait. Kate took pictures to document the moment and
her near-death experience. She also called Shaun and told him how
much she loved him and the dogs.

Lucy posted a picture to Facebook with the
caption, “It’s not just for trucks anymore!” which received
numerous comments and “likes.” She also received a very worried
call from her mother.

“That’s why I ignored my mother’s Facebook
request,” Wendy said.

“I can relate,” Vivian said. “I tried, but
she called and said I was the only one who had not accepted her
friend request. I claimed ignorance, but that only got me so
far.”

“Y’all are awful,” Lucy said. “Your mothers
are so sweet.”

“I didn’t let my mom know what crazy things I
was up to in high school or college, Lucy; I’m not sure I want her
to know what craziness I’m up to now,” Wendy said. “I’m not ready
to admit ‘The Boat.’ ”

“The Jack Daniel’s incident?” Vivian
asked.

“Yep.”

A toothless tow truck driver arrived and
hooked up the SUV. All four girls piled into his wrecker and he
towed them down the mountain. He dropped them off in El Jebel at
the closest garage.

The girls waited in a coffee shop across the
street while the mechanic worked on Lucy’s SUV.

Vivian went to pay for her snack and saw that
Yellow Aspen Hotel envelope in her purse. “I forgot all about
this.”

“About what?” Kate asked.

“The front-desk guy said this was left for
me. I’m sure it’s from Eric, his phone number or something.”

“Ooooh, let’s read it,” Kate said. “See what
your sweetie-pie said.”

The bell above the door chimed, and the
mechanic walked in and approached their table.

“Yer all set. The brake valves over both
front tires was loose, fluid sprayed damn near everywhere. The
reservoir didn’t have no fluid left, which is why yer brakes didn’t
work.”

“That’s weird,” Lucy said. “Why would the
valves be loose?”

“Did ya have ’em serviced lately? Cuz a bad
mechanic coulda forgotten to tighten ’em.”

“No. I just had the oil changed, but they
didn’t mess with the brakes, only checked the fluid.”

He scratched his chin. “It’s kinda squirrely
that both of ’em was loose.”

“Could they have worked themselves loose from
general wear and tear?” Wendy asked.

“You do go off-roading a lot,” Vivian
said.

The mechanic shrugged and handed her a bill.
“It’d take some doing.” He left them to their thoughts.

Vivian still held the hotel envelope. She
opened it. “What the hell is this?” She threw a picture of herself
down on the table for the girls to see.

“That’s what you wore last night,” Lucy
said.

“Yeah, but I’m by myself and, if you notice,
I’m not wearing a bra,” Vivian said. “That means it was taken after
I left Eric’s.”

“Holy shit, Viv,” Wendy said. “That’s messed
up. Do you think he followed you?”

“He offered to walk me back but I said I’d be
fine. He was snoring by the time I walked out the door.”

Kate pointed to the picture. “Then who could
have taken this?”

Vivian put it down. “The same person that
messed with the brakes.”

Only one name came to mind.

IT has to be Craig,” Vivian said, looking at
the picture of herself on her walk/run of shame. “I was so excited
when we booked this trip, and it was before he freaked out on me,
so I told him where we were staying. Even showed him the
website.”

Kate pointed to the picture. “So you think he
was there in Aspen and followed you back from Eric’s?”

Wendy stirred her coffee. “It takes some
skills to tamper with the brakes enough that they don’t go out
until we’re out of town and going down the mountain. Is he capable
of that?”

“I’m beginning to realize that I have no idea
what he is capable of, but who else could it have been?”

“Have you seen him in the last two days?”
Kate asked.

Vivian started to answer “no,” but then
thought about it. “Yesterday morning, playing racquetball. As I
opened the door to leave the court, I thought I saw him. But it was
just the back of him, and the guy disappeared through a door, so I
dismissed it. Figured surely, no way it was him.”

“He’s spying on you,” Lucy said.

“Fuck,” was all Vivian could say to that.
Then something else clicked in her brain. “The cologne.”

“We didn’t smell it, though,” Kate said.

Vivian shook her head. “I could have sworn I
did, but only for a second.”

“Why would he try to kill you, though, Viv?”
Kate asked. “For breaking-up with him?”

“He must be super pissed-off you slept with
Eric,” Wendy said.

“Is his ego that sensitive or is he a control
freak?” Lucy asked.

“He’s obviously not the person I thought he
was. Stealing people’s credit card info and spying. I found out the
hard way that he has a temper when he tore up my house. The FBI
agent told me that he has something like 20 aliases.”

“Is Craig even his real name?” Wendy
asked.

“I don’t know.”

Kate shivered. “This feels like my
grasshopper dream.”

“What?” Vivian asked.

“Last night, I dreamt I was walking on a
familiar path in the middle of a field. A few giant grasshoppers
started springing up out of the tall grass on either side of me so
I walked a little faster. More grasshoppers sprang out of the
grass, some jumping across the path in front of me. I ran, trying
to get away from them, but the faster I ran, the more there were
and the less control I had over my legs. I finally had no control
at all and they crowded me, their creepy little legs crawling all
over me.”

“That is so weird,” Wendy said as she brushed
away imaginary grasshoppers from her arms.

“Did you get away from them?” Lucy asked.

“One minute they surrounded me, and the next
I was at a serene, beautiful lake holding a fishing rod. I reached
onto my shoulder and grabbed a big grasshopper. I looked into his
eyes before I stabbed the fishing hook through his exoskeleton. I
can still hear the crunch.”

“Ewww,” Vivian said.

“Was that the end?” Wendy asked.

“I cast out the line and there was a sharp
tug. That’s when I woke up.”

“What do you think it means?” Vivian
asked.

“It means stay the hell away from
grasshoppers!” Lucy said.

Kate thought for a moment. “I don’t know. I
usually have family visit me in my dreams, not insects. I think
Craig’s not done with you.”

“That being said, I think we should
not
stay at the hotel in Vail,” Vivian said. “Craig knew
what hotel I was going to. I think we cancel and find something off
the beaten path.”

“Done,” Wendy said, pulling out her phone.
“I’ll call them and cancel the reservation.”

“Where should we go?” Kate asked. “I think
somewhere
not
near a lake.”

“I’ll call my friend Blair,” Vivian said.
“She just took her second honeymoon near Vail.”