River Road (River's End Series, #4) (27 page)

Before last May, she didn’t feel alone in Seattle. Of course, she had her mother then, and friends and co-workers. And other things were very important to her. She thought her life was full and satisfying. Now? What? It wasn’t just because she hooked up over the summer with a hot guy? AJ not only satisfied her physically, but even harder to imagine, he stirred up her emotions. No other man could do that.

Kate arrived at the condo and unpacked her suitcase, cleaned the house, paid the bills and ran errands. She emptied her kitchen since most of the perishables had expired. When she returned to work, she tried to keep the sad, heavy feelings at bay. But every evening found her alone. No one else was around. No mother to call for a chat. Complain to. Or gossip with. Grief over the harsh reality of her loss flooded her emotions. Yeah, the summer provided a brilliant escape, mostly from her true feelings. Her grief. Her sadness. Her anger.

How could someone she’d known her entire life keep such a terrible secret from her? No amount of hypothetical circumstances helped. After searching through her mom’s personal things, there were still no answers. She found no secret diary or love letters. There was no answers. She left Kate absolute nothing but money. Except Jack’s birth certificate.

Now Kate had the rest of her life to wonder why? How could she reconcile her former image of her mother into someone who was not so perfect, and actually made mistakes? How could a mother ditch her own child? But she didn’t ditch Kate, and Kate had to live with that dichotomy.

Things settled back down as Kate gradually settled in. There was a certain relief and familiarity, however, as time passed and she resumed her former life. It was all exactly as she left it. She went to work, and spoke to a few friends, although she still didn’t feel like responding to their invitations to dinner or even just drinks. She basically went to work and came home. Life was quiet. Flat. Boring. Forgotten. And lonely. She was so lonely sometimes, she ached at night.

Then one day, she got a call.

“Kate?”

She gripped the phone, AJ’s voice sounded rough and rattled as he said her name. They talked often enough that she recognized the panic-stricken undertone. “What happened?

“Cami’s gone. We’ve looked everywhere for her. She left school and didn’t come home. I have no idea… Fuck!” He shouted into the phone. Bug-eyed, Kate swallowed her own terror. AJ sounded so lost…

Kate quickly gathered her scattered senses. “She ran away, AJ. So she’s not hurt or kidnapped, she voluntarily went to wherever she’s gone. That I know. Down in my heart. So we have to stop, think, and be smart. Where would she go? Do you hear me? She’s okay.” Kate drew in a sharp breath. She insisted that it be true. There was no other option her racing heart and sweaty palms could accept. “We have to remain calm and figure this out. Get ahead of her.”

AJ’s breath whooshed into the receiver as he replied, “Do you think so?”

“Yes.” Kate calmed her tone. “Yes, I know her. She’s punishing us. You. Me. Her mother. Her father. Foster care. A broken system. All the awful things that she had to endure. Just like when she got on top of Joey.”

“We have to find her. Imagine the trouble she could get into. If she doesn’t find it first. She’s so small…”

“We’ll find her, AJ. Pull out her file, the one that Nicola gave you. Sit down and read the fucker out loud to me. Let’s start there.”

She heard his breath slow down and her own heartbeat started to even out. They’d find her. Of course, they would. No other outcome was acceptable. AJ disappeared for a moment, and she heard some shuffling and muffled movement before he returned and started reading. She listened to Cami’s long history with the state, but there was nothing that linked Cami to any particular place or person.

“Did she talk to you about anything recently?” Kate asked AJ.

“I found a new place for us. She didn’t like it. She wants to stay here. I tried to explain that we can’t live in Jack’s family house. It isn’t ours. She didn’t understand why it was fine as long as you were here.”

Kate closed her eyes. The poor girl’s entire duration of stability was not even weeks old, and again, she was about to be moved. She sat up straight in her office chair. She has to be coming here. Kate suddenly knew the result. Cami leaving. Kate returning to Seattle. Cami was coming to her.

“Don’t worry, AJ. She’s coming here. Get in your truck and start driving now. Come to my place. I’ll find her, I’m sure I will.”

“How can you know that?”

“She’s looking for stability. That was us. Together. We represented her first glimpse of stability, and then I left. She’s punishing you now for letting me leave, and me for leaving. Just trust me. Come to Seattle.”

“Where will she go? She has no idea where you live. She can’t navigate a city of tens of thousands of people. How will she even get there?”

“The girl’s been on her own all her life. I doubt a bus schedule would exactly stump her. I’m sure in all her thirteen-year-old brilliance, she hasn’t considered that. She just associates Seattle with me, and thinks she’ll be fine. I’ll find her when the bus gets in. I promise, AJ. I’ll find her. In the meantime, keep trying to get a hold of her.”

“I’m on my way. God, Kate if you’re wrong…”

“I’m not wrong.”

“Or if you somehow miss her.”

“I always do what I say I’m going to do.”

Kate hung up, turning her chair to stare out over the city-scape of tall towers and square street blocks. She twisted her chair in half circles. Her jangled nerves began winding up her spine. What if she were wrong? But no. Nothing bad could have happened to Cami. She was simply taking a bus ride… here. Kate worked out a timeline, after some quick research online for the bus schedules. If Cami caught the first bus leaving River’s End, she should be showing up at the bus terminal in another half hour. Kate would be there, waiting with bells on, if necessary. She got up quickly, grabbed her purse, and yelled to her secretary that she was gone for the day and to cancel everything. Nothing could stop her from her mission.

The bus station was huge. Buses kept entering and leaving the terminal constantly. It was gray concrete, dense with people at times, and at others only a trickle. Kate found the proper terminal and waited. She didn’t pull out her phone or dare let her gaze wander. She simply stared at the spot where the bus was due to show up. Soon. So soon…

Finally, Bus #23 swung wide as it pulled into the lane and stopped almost ten feet from Kate. The passengers began to step right onto the curb of the sidewalk, and Kate was on her feet, moving within inches of the door. No one could get past her. Kate saw Cami standing at the top of the stairs inside the Greyhound. Her makeup was as black as ever, and her dreadlocks were every bit as awesome and natty. Her eyes gleamed when she saw Kate, but nothing on her face twitched in recognition. She took a step. And stopped. Then another. And stopped, her eyes never leaving Kate’s. The man behind Cami grumbled and pushed her.

Kate aimed a scowl at him and snarled, “Hey.” Kate stepped towards the man. “Get your hands off her. Back the fuck off! She’s just a little girl. Let her have a moment here, asshole.”

The guy, huge and tatted up, glared harder at her. He was maybe in his mid-twenties. Kate glared back. Cami looked over her shoulder, then back at Kate before she suddenly launched herself at Kate and started to cry.

Kate had to step back. She was wearing high heels and wobbled off balance as Cami pressed against her chest, wrapping her arms around her back. Cami’s backpack held all of her worldly goods and it looked so heavy and bulky on her small, frail back. Kate found her footing and held the girl, eventually tipping her back far enough to look into her tear-streaked, black, running, made-up face. She held Cami’s biceps in her hands and shook her gently. “What’s the matter with you, you little fool? AJ’s out of his mind with worry. If I hadn’t guessed where you’d go, you could have gotten lost. Where the hell were you going?”

Cami didn’t answer, her eyes glistening with tears. Sighing, Kate pulled her closer for a tight hug. Cami rubbed her face on Kate’s white blouse, ruining it with the ridiculous mask of black makeup that was painted on Cami’s face. Kate pulled back. “How can we keep you safe if you won’t let us?”

“Us? There is no
us
. You don’t want there to be.”

“There is an
us
.” Kate’s tone was final. “And just because I went back to my job, and my condo and former address ,doesn’t mean I don’t want you to stay
safe.
You have to know that.”

“He’s trying to move me.”

“He has to,” Kate replied wearily. “He doesn’t own anything at the ranch.”

“Then come back. You do.”

“No, I don’t, honey.”

“You’re Jack’s sister.”

Simple, teenage, selfish logic. Kate let out a breath of air and shook her head. “Let’s go to my house. AJ will be there in a few hours.”

Cami didn’t respond as the people around them drifted off. Kate hiked Cami’s backpack a little higher up before leaning over and gently running her hand through Cami’s dreadlocks. “What made you run away today?”

“Shit at school.”

“What shit, Cami?”

“Some bitch-ass girls talking smack about me. Whatevs.”

Right. Whatevs as the girl took off across half a state she wasn’t familiar with to a city she didn’t know. Kate was sure there was talk. Nobody else looked like Cami at the small public school that Cami now attended. It included middle through high school and the total population of kids numbered less than five hundred. Everyone knew each other. Kate had dropped Cami off there one time and she scoured the crowds for anyone dressed similarly to the way Cami dressed, but found none. 

Cami stared down at her combat boots. “If I went to school here, I bet I would fit in somewhere,” she added softly.

But Cami, I’m not your damn parent
, Kate thought. Of course, she didn’t want to say it. Not at all. Even if it were obvious. Even if it were the right thing to say.

“Let’s stop and get some food; come on, kid.”

Cami obediently followed Kate without complaint or rebellion.

When Kate unlocked her front door, Cami put her backpack down. She spun all around, taking in Kate’s condo. “Wow,” she whispered as she stared in visible awe, running her hands over the sofa.

It was rather small with a big master bedroom and a small second room that Kate used as a home office and extra closet for all her clothes. Cami walked around, only stopping before Kate’s closet to run her hand over her shoes and boots, as well as the silk blouses, jackets, dress slacks, skirts, and dresses. Much of Kate’s budget was spent on her wardrobe.

Kate wanted to reassure Cami, but she kept quiet, letting Cami decompress. Wandering around aimlessly, Cami finally sat down at the small, glass table and dug into the bag of fast food Kate bought her on the way home. Kate slipped her heels off and went into the kitchen in her stockings. She poured some wine to take the edge off, untucking her blouse from her skirt, and happened to glance up and catch Cami glaring at her. Her dark, smoky eyes made her glare all the fiercer
. What did I do now?
Kate wondered as she straightened up from closing the fridge.

“Why the scowl?” Kate asked as she took the chair opposite Cami and sat down, slipping her feet up onto another chair and cradling her glass of wine.

“What’s the point of drinking that stuff?” Cami asked as she waved toward the wine. Kate sighed and set the glass on the table with a soft ping. Apparently, alcohol was also an issue. Along with everything else affecting this kid.

“Well, for me it is, I’m an adult who doesn’t abuse it. Not you. Not some people, either.”

“So just drink water, if you don’t need it.”

“Well, it’s good to have an opinion on things. Maybe it will keep you from indulging in it before you should. But I can do it responsibly. I enjoy it. I take it you know someone who abused it?”

She shrugged, dropping her eyes again. The snippets were all she gave away, like little crumbs she sprinkled around her, before clamming up, and keeping her real thoughts or opinions to herself.

“Cami?”

Her mouth was full of hamburger, but finally, she mumbled, “Anyone I ever saw using it.”

Wonderful
. Were there any positive influences in her young life? What the fuck was wrong with people? Kate studied the down-turned expression of Cami Reed. She was so young and small, like a naïve, elementary school girl sitting there. Except she wasn’t. There were parts of her behavior, her vocabulary, her soul, and her experiences that far exceeded even Kate’s. Kate chose to never have kids because she wasn’t ready and never met anyone she wanted to raise them with. Kids giving birth to more kids. Like AJ and Parker. Don’t teenagers have the slightest clue of how to give a young, helpless baby, toddler, or child even the minimum of care? Parker might not have been the best mother at age sixteen, but she must have understood some obvious things.

Kate let the matter drop as she finished the wine, and didn’t pour more. Seemed a fair compromise. Perhaps if she respected Cami’s fears, she could show her a different way of handling intoxicants like alcohol.

Kate stretched out on the couch with her feet up on the coffee table as Cami sat on the recliner and watched MTV. Kate didn’t know any of the bands or singers, and Cami started to explain why some artists were
soo
great and others weren’t. Kate was pleased to see Cami so eager to talk about the subject. So the girl liked music. To the extreme. She never went without her headphones, listening to an ancient iPod she acquired from a family who no longer wanted it. It was the only luxury the poor girl had.