Rite of Rejection (Acceptance Book 1) (20 page)

“Do you think we need to be worried about her giving us up?”

Daniel shakes his head. “No, she’d never betray us like that, but she’s definitely not going to help. We should probably not talk about it around her too much.”

“Right. Are you ready?” Daniel hasn’t eaten much more of his breakfast than I have.

“Not really, but we don’t have the time to wait for me to get there.” He holds out his hand. “Let’s go.”

Twenty-Four

A huge rock in my stomach weighs down each step as we get closer to the southern edge of the PIT. If Eric told the other Cardinal guards about the old security building full of computer castoffs, our chances of finding everything we need are slim. Even before the recent cleanup, electronic equipment was a rare find in the cluttered alleys. Now, it’s a near impossibility.

The outside of the security building looks the same as it did the last time we were here, but it’s the inside that counts. Daniel and I both pause outside the door. If the building is cleared out, it’s likely we’ll never find what we need and our plan is ruined.

Daniel looks at me and I nod. I close my eyes when he pushes the door open so I can hold on to an extra few seconds of hope. “Sweet Cardinal.”

I open my eyes and my legs collapse beneath me. Inside the room, every table, shelf and workbench is empty. Completely cleared of the countless pieces of machinery that were essential to my happiness. We have nothing.

“No.” I pound my fists against the hard-packed dirt floor of the building, ignoring the throbbing pain traveling from my bruised hands up my arms. “No, no, no!” Hot, angry tears prickle against my cheek. I use the dusty sleeve of my dress to wipe them away. The PIT doesn’t get any more of my tears.

“Rebecca, I—”

“No.” I stand up and push his hand away. The empty building isn’t his fault, but I’m angry and Eric isn’t here for me to yell at him. “Unless you have another buried burlap treasure, we’re…we’re screwed.”

“Rebecca Jane Collins.”

My hands shoot up to cover my mouth and I’m absolutely mortified. Never in my life have I used such foul language. My mother always said gutter language was for Rejects. A panicked giggle bubbles up from inside and slips between my fingers before I can stop it. What would she say to me now? “I’m sorry, I just… Wait a minute. How do you know my middle name? I never tell anyone.”

“Oh, well…” Little lines form between Daniel’s eyebrows and a light blush creeps up to redden the beautiful brown skin of his cheeks. I want to touch his face to see if it’s warm. “I might have peeked when I was setting up your OneCard profile.”

I hold out my hand palm up and curl my fingers. “Fair’s fair. You have to tell me yours.”

“I don’t have one.”

“Who doesn’t have a middle name?” My hands migrate to my hips, and I squint my eyes in my very best ‘you better not be lying’ look.

“Honestly.” Daniel holds his hands up as if I accused him of stealing. “It’s a tradition in my family that the men don’t have middle names.”

“Then I guess you’ll just have to tell me something else about yourself. Something I don’t know about you.”

Daniel’s eyes flash wide for a second before a resolved calm steadies his face. He wipes his hands on the side of his pants before taking a step closer to me. “I have a secret.” Another step closer. “One I’ve wanted to tell you for a while.” Another step brings him within inches of me.

The small room was already a bit stuffy with the warmer spring air, but it’s suddenly a hot box. My arms tingle from the remembered contact of the hug we shared this morning. I want to close the gap between us, but my feet are bolted to the floor and I’m afraid the slightest movement will collapse the tenuous hold I have on my ability to stand.

Daniel’s hand reaches up and tucks a yellow curl behind my ear. “I think you’re beautiful.”

I open my mouth to say thank you, because that’s what I’m supposed to say when someone gives me a compliment. Daniel slides his hand over and blocks my lips with a raised finger. “And not just because you have the kindest green eyes and a disarming smile that you share with anyone and everyone. You’re stunningly beautiful because you never lose your ability to trust even after you’ve been cheated, and when something bad happens you worry about how it impacts everyone else first, and you did everything we asked you to, even though it made you unhappy.”

Daniel dips his hand down under my chin and pulls it up until I’m staring right into the depths of his coal-dark eyes. I blink away the tears pooling in the bottom of my eyes. I don’t want to miss a second of the way he’s looking at me.

“We never asked what you wanted and I’m sorry about that. It was wrong to assume so much and I promise to never do that again. Which is why I need to ask you a question.” His thumb strokes the side of my chin and I lean my head into his hand. “Would it be alright if I kiss you?”

I nod my head, because ‘yes’ doesn’t feel potent enough for how much I want him to kiss me right now. Daniel fills the remaining distance between us, wraps his free arm around my waist, and bends his head down to match his lips with mine.

I kiss him back, not because I’m supposed to or because I don’t want to hurt his feelings. I kiss him because I want to. Because I’ve wanted to for longer than I ever admitted to myself.

Daniel pulls me tighter until our bodies line up like the final piece of a puzzle sliding into place. My arms wrap around his neck and I let go of the stress from the past twenty-four hours. His lips are warm and soft against mine.

This is nothing like the only other kiss I have to compare it to.

My first kiss on the roof. His mouth was hard against mine, demanding more than I could give him. Daniel’s kiss is tentative, inviting. Kissing Daniel is like coming home, and his arm wrapped around my waist is the most natural thing on earth.

His hand traces the line of my jaw from the bottom of my ear to the tip of my chin. His mouth pulls away from mine and I whimper a protest. His lips trace the same line as his finger and my protest turns to a moan I’ve never made before. A shiver runs across my shoulder blades despite the overwhelming warmth of the room.

Daniel’s mouth moves from my chin down to the side of my neck and I tilt my head to invite him to more of my skin. His fingers move up and down my spine, stoking the fire growing in the pit of my belly.

Warm lips find mine again and this time I’m the one demanding more, pushing my lips into his, pushing to take in more of him. His tongue dips out to slide along my bottom lip and I open my mouth to him. Daniel’s body hardens against mine and he spins me around until my back is pressed up against the cool concrete wall. My body hums like a live wire. He wants me as much as I want him. As much as I need him.

This is what was missing all those months, what I tried to pretend I had with Eric. I can almost laugh at how ridiculous it was. A chaste kiss on the cheek and a hug that lingered just longer than my father would have approved of. We were children playing a game of love.

But now I know it can’t be faked. You can’t light a candle and pretend it’s a furnace. This is what I’m fighting to protect. I won’t let the Cardinal have this.

Daniel pulls back slightly and kisses one eyelid, then the other before leaving the lightest of kisses on my lips. We lean against the wall for a minute, our foreheads pressed together, while we bring our breathing back down to normal speeds. His warm hands on the side of my face have a calming effect.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.” Daniel’s face is still so close to mine that the heat of his words tickles my nose.

I laugh at the absurdity of the situation. “Probably about as long as I’ve been pretending I didn’t want you to.”

Daniel pulls back to match his dark-brown eyes with mine, and then we’re both laughing. Because it’s easier to laugh than cry. Because all this time we wasted not being together and we might only have days left before the Cardinal separates us for good, or worse.

Daniel takes my hand and pulls me outside into the blinding noon sun. “I need to show you something.”

We walk in silence along the edge of the fence. It’s strange how I can experience two completely opposite emotions at the same time. Part of my heart sings with Daniel’s hand around mine, his thumb rubbing soft circles along the top of my skin. But my happiness isn’t complete. We don’t have any of the equipment Daniel needs to hack the Acceptance feed and with the old security room empty I have no idea if we’ll ever find it.

A few rows away from the security building Daniel stops outside of one of the countless rundown shacks that make up the edge of the PIT. It looks the same as any of the others except for a dingy scrap of fabric tied around the frame of a busted window. Inside, the stench of rot is suffocating. It doesn’t take long to see why. The back corner is stacked to the ceiling with moldy mattresses.

I choke back a gag and use my fingers to pinch off my nose. My voice comes out weak and nasally. “What are we doing in here?”

“Why don’t you wait outside? This will only take a minute.”

I step back out and watch Daniel from the safety of the broken window. Using the neck of his shirt as a defense against the odor, he goes to work pulling mattresses off the pile. When the right side of the mound is moved away, he reaches back into the corner and pulls out a huge box.

“What is that?”

Daniel doesn’t stop to show me. He runs to the empty building next door and calls over his shoulder, “Not out in the open.”

I catch up to him just as he pulls a huge cable out of the box and sets it on the ground next to where he’s crouched over the mystery box. “Did you just pull another burlap bag trick?”

Daniel pats the floor next to him and continues to pull out random items, spreading them out around him. “The day we left, you went for a walk with Eric.” He pauses to inspect a small switch, but I keep my mouth shut. This is a story I want to hear.

“I was so mad, at both of you.”

“What? Why?”

Daniel sets the switch down on a growing pile next to him and stops to look at me. “I guess that’s not fair. Maybe I was just mad at the situation. Mad that you were going to marry Eric, even though I could tell you didn’t want to, despite what you said. And furious that Eric would get to marry you, even though it was clear he didn’t see you for the amazing woman you are.”

I grab Daniel’s hand and wish I could go back in time and erase so many things. All that time I spent trying not to think about him, pretending it didn’t hurt to see him with Elizabeth. To know he felt the same way, hid the same pain. Such a waste.

“I needed to get away and I knew no one would bother me out in the security building. I wasn’t planning on anything, but once I got inside, I realized it wouldn’t hurt to shore up my back-up plan. The Noteboard was already buried out at the fence, but having some spare equipment would be handy as well.”

“So do you have the equipment we need?”

Daniel goes back to sorting through the box, laying everything into one of two piles. “I have no idea. There wasn’t time to be picky so I grabbed a box and loaded it up with anything that didn’t look broken. The stinkhouse was a bit of good luck. Unlikely anyone would bother combing through there for loot.”

I reach into the box and pull out a bulky rectangle with a cracked digital display on one side. All the wires and gizmos are a mystery to me, but this was my idea and I feel like I should help. “So what exactly are we looking for?”

Daniel pauses in his search, but before he can give me a description of what we need, he snatches the object out of my hand and kisses me hard on the mouth. “This is what we’re looking for.”

My head is a little woozy from his unexpected kiss, but I gather my thoughts enough to form words. “What is it?”

“This is a transmitter. We’ll use it to broadcast our own signal over the one being used by the ceremony.” Daniel stands up and brushes off the back of his pants before offering me a hand up.

“What about a camera?”

“I’ll get the camera tonight.” Daniel stuffs the transmitter into his full pockets and takes my hand to head back home.

“But where are you going to get one?”

“I have my choice, seeing as how there are two right outside the Admin building.”

I stop walking and his hand tugs against my arm. “No, no way. It’s too dangerous. There are guards all over the PIT right now. We can’t risk it.”

Daniel turns around and brings both my hands up to his lips. “I have to. We need a camera.”

“I just got you. I can’t lose you now.”

“And that’s why I have to get the camera. We have to do this, Rebecca. You were right. Getting the truth out is our only chance at stopping the Cardinal in his tracks.”

“Then I’ll help you.”

“No,” he says pulling my hands down and lowering his face till it’s even with mine. “It’s enough to put me at risk. We don’t need both of us in danger.”

“Going alone is asking for trouble. I can help keep a lookout. Make sure no one catches you off guard.”

“Rebecca—”

“I’m going, it’s final. This was my idea and I’m making an executive decision. Let’s go get Elizabeth for lunch and then get back to the bunkhouse. We need to make a plan if we’re going out tonight.”

Daniel crosses his arms and gives me his dimple smile. “Just out of curiosity, when did you decide to become Miss Take Charge?”

“When the Cardinal decided to mess with my family.” I cross my arms to match his pose. “Is that a problem?”

Daniel throws his hands up, palms out. “Nope, no problem here.” I catch the smallest of smirks on his face as he turns around.