Reverie (Hollow Hearts Book 1) (8 page)

Just as she began to doze off with Lottie still tucked in her lap, the door burst open. Elias walked in with Doc Winters hurrying behind him. He looked at Hetty, mouthed a simple
thank you
, and headed upstairs. Hetty shifted and laid Lottie down on the sofa. She lifted an old quilt from the corner and wrapped it around the girl who still slept soundly and made her way upstairs to see how she could help.

Hetty entered the crowded room and immediately noticed that Elizabeth was awake. Isaac and Elias stood off to the side as Doc Winters began his exam. He listened to her heart, checked her reflexes, and asked several questions about how Elizabeth had been feeling recently. Hetty moved to stand beside the brothers, not wanting to be an intrusion on the process. She listened as Elizabeth answered each of the doctor’s questions, surprised to learn that she had been feeling faint for several days leading up to Hetty’s arrival.

“Why didn’t you tell anyone you weren’t feeling well, Elizabeth?” Doc Winters asked.

“Doc, you know my boys. They worry too much over me already. I wasn’t going to ask any more of them than I already do. Plus, I knew Hetty would be coming to help. So I figured I’d be fine until she got here and I could rest,” Elizabeth said, giving the much older man that motherly stare few could resist.

“Well, I have some concerns about your heart, Elizabeth,” Doc said. He went on to explain that he felt her heart was getting weaker and that he wasn’t sure if rest would do much good. There was a new medicine he wanted to try, but it was expensive and he’d have to have it sent from New York. “It might help with some of the weakness and tiredness you’re feeling, but it is terribly costly. I’ve only prescribed it a handful of times.”

Isaac interrupted the doctor. “Send for it.”

“Excuse me?” Elizabeth said firmly. “Isaac, we need to talk about this before we make any decisions.”

“We are done talking, mother. If this medicine can help you then we will find a way to pay for it. We’ll sell off a few acres if we have to. I’ll take on more furniture jobs. You will get what you need.” There was no argument—Isaac’s tone left no room for it.

“I suppose I can send word today,” Doc Winters said. “I have an old colleague in New York that should be able to send it once he receives word. You just pay me when you can.” Doc Winters began packing up his case. “In the meantime, you are to rest. I don’t want you doing any physical work. I want you reading and napping and nothing more. Do you understand, young lady?”

Elizabeth, despite feeling weak, laughed. Doc Winters wasn’t too much older than she was, but his attempts at being authoritative were quite humorous. “I promise, Doc.”

Doc Winters rose from the bed, motioned for the men to join him in the hall, and left Hetty to tend to Elizabeth. Hetty moved to sit on the edge of the bed, the spot the doctor had just vacated.

“Elizabeth, I want you to know that I have no issues picking up the extra work. I want you to take the doctor’s orders seriously and rest as much as possible.”

“Oh, Hetty. You’ve only been here a day and already you’re a true blessing to this family.” Elizabeth reached over and patted her hand. “I think I’ll rest a bit now.”

“That’s fine. I’ll bring your lunch up in a little while.” Hetty adjusted the quilt across Elizabeth’s lap and quietly left the room.

As she made her way back downstairs she heard Isaac and Elias talking in the kitchen. She peeked at Lottie, still sleeping, and headed to the kitchen. Both boys were sitting at the table, their hands resting on their foreheads. The looked more like brothers in this moment than they had since she’d met them. She moved to the stove, checked the temperature of the oven, and slid the loaves of rising bread into the heat. She stirred the stew, still simmering on the back of the stove, and began cleaning the green beans they’d pulled while on their walk through the garden.

“Hetty, can you come sit down for a moment?” Isaac asked.

“Of course.” Hetty took the the bowl with her so she could continue preparing lunch while they talked. She sat in the same seat she’d had at breakfast and sat down.

“Hetty, you heard what the doctor said about Mother needing more rest. We need to know how you feel about taking on more responsibility,” Isaac said, removing his hands from his forehead and looking directly at her.

Is he worried about my answer?
Hetty thought.
I hope he knows by now that I’m more than willing to do my share of the work.
“I understand, Isaac. We haven’t discussed the extent of my duties yet, but I certainly don’t see a problem adding a bit more work. I want to do all I can to help your mother...” she hesitated.  “And both of you.”

“We appreciate that, Hetty. You did an amazing job today with Lottie,” Elias said, smiling. “I think we were all so surprised with what happened, and your first thought was to make sure my daughter was taken care of. She could have been terribly frightened.”

Hetty lowered her voice almost to a whisper, “I remember what it’s like to feel alone.”

Both Isaac and Elias looked at her, unable to ignore the sudden meekness her character took on.
It must have been so difficult growing up without a family
, Isaac thought.
How has she managed? Always being just on the outside of having a family of her own?
In that moment Isaac vowed to do what he could to see that Hetty was comfortable here with his family. He may not be able to give her a family of her own, but he could at least show her what it was like to be part of one.

“I’m sure we’ll get all the details worked out. In the meantime, let’s have our meal and tonight we’ll figure out how to proceed,” Elias stated, hoping to break the silence that had settled around the table.

As Hetty finished preparing the noon meal, Elias woke Lottie from her nap and Isaac took a small tray of tea and biscuits to his mother. When they finally gathered around the table to enjoy the stew and fresh bread, everyone took notice of Elizabeth’s absence. Though she was just upstairs, her absence left the table without its wonderful matriarchal presence. The four of them ate in silence, and the worry over Elizabeth’s health was palpable. Hetty took notice. The brothers exuded worry and even Lottie seemed to know the seriousness of the situation. The woman they all loved, the woman whose job it was to care for them now needed their care. And they feared she might not recover.

When the meal was finished Isaac and Elias excused themselves to finish their work for the day. Hetty knew Lottie wouldn’t sleep this afternoon, so she offered to let the child help her clean up the dishes. Hetty didn’t mind that Lottie seemed to get as much water on the floor as she did on the dishes—the young girl was smiling and that’s all that mattered. When the kitchen was tidied Hetty decided it would be best to figure out the tasks she’d need to complete. She needed to get the house in order and keep up with the daily chores. She could see that Elizabeth had tried her best, but she knew certain tasks would require her immediate attention.

Hetty retrieved a couple pieces of paper from her room as well as the coloring sticks she’d purchased as a surprise for Lottie. The child’s eyes lit up when Hetty showed her how they’d make the most beautiful marks on the paper. Lottie asked if she could make a picture for her grandmother, and Hetty agreed that it was a wonderful idea. While Lottie busied herself trying each color in a mishmash pattern, Hetty began making her list.

The orphanage where she’d grown up ran a rather tight schedule. It was a necessity with so many children to look after. Catherine wasn’t one to let any task or chore slip by anyone at the orphanage. Each person was responsible for specific things—that was her motto—and Hetty was no different. She’d done her share of work when she lived at the orphanage not only because it was expected, but also because it was easier to work silently than face Catherine’s wrath. So Hetty decided to adopt a similar schedule for the Wheeler house, since she already knew which days worked best for which tasks. She knew each day needed to run with efficiency, but she was determined to leave some time for her and Lottie to play and explore. It wouldn’t be good for Lottie to stay cooped up all day while Hetty cooked and cleaned, so she decided right then to make sure there was always something Lottie could “help” with.

Monday would be Hetty’s laundry day. Taking on this chore meant that Tuesday needed to be reserved for ironing and mending. Baking would need to be done twice a week at least, so Hetty reserved Wednesday and Saturday for the task. It would be wonderful to get Lottie involved in the kitchen—the smells, the mixing, the fun of seeing something come together. That left Thursday as Hetty’s cleaning day and Friday for gardening, canning, and other miscellaneous chores. She planned to use her Sunday afternoons for devotions and any necessary sewing. Isaac mentioned it would be her day off, but she couldn’t imagine using it while Elizabeth was ill.

Hetty looked over her schedule, pleased with the result. She felt like she could handle the workload now that she was a bit more organized and she’d share this with the brothers this evening. For now, Hetty decided she and Lottie would spend the afternoon baking. There was already a fresh loaf of bread for dinner, but Hetty decided to make another batch to last them a couple more days. She also planned to make some of Sol’s wonderful oatmeal cookies and a pie for tonight’s dessert with the last jar of canned apples she’d found in the pantry. Hetty was determined to show Isaac, Elias, and Elizabeth that she was fully capable of handling the work and taking care of Lottie. It might not be her family, but Hetty’s desire to make this family run smoothly overshadowed that fact.

Isaac threw himself on the bed, sore and exhausted. The past two weeks had taken their toll on his body both physically and mentally. With Hetty tending to his mother and the house nearly full time, he’d finally had the chance to catch up on the work he’d let slide. His current furniture orders were finished and ready for delivery. The barn had been cleaned and prepped for winter. He’d even managed to find time to help Elias repair several fences around the pastures. Together they’d worked to get the ranch where it needed to be. He didn’t realize how much work had gone unfinished before Hetty had come to help until he was given the chance to play catch-up.

Hetty.
He was so grateful for her willingness to do anything he or his brother asked. She’d managed to keep the house running smoothly, despite Elizabeth’s need to rest and recover. And she did so without hurting his mother’s pride. Isaac knew how important caring for the home and the family was to his mother and, unable to tend to her regular duties, she’d been left a bit down in spirit. Still, Hetty had done an incredible job keeping Elizabeth informed and involved as much as possible while still managing to keep the woman resting and recovering. It was a tricky balance and she’d done it gracefully.

In just two short weeks she’d turned the garden into a magnificent supply of fresh fall produce. She’d filled their larder with beans, tomatoes, onions, potatoes, and squash for winter. She’d mended their worn clothing, taught Elizabeth the basics of embroidery, and baked so many delicious things Isaac was sure he’d put on a few pounds.

The woman amazed him. As he lay in bed he couldn’t help but picture her slender frame moving so delicately through the kitchen as she went about her chores. He saw the sweet tendrils of her brown hair escaping her straw hat as she pulled weeds in the garden. He heard the joyous laughter coming from her plump lips as she played games tirelessly with his niece. Yes, she was incredible. And the thought terrified Isaac to his very core.

Why am I letting this woman get to me?
he thought.
She’s here to help Mother, nothing more.
As he tried to convince himself that his growing feelings were born of gratefulness, he couldn’t help picturing what it would be like to kiss those sweet lips. The image took him into a deep sleep...

Hetty knew she needed to turn off her lamp and sleep. The sun would rise soon enough and she’d be up to tend to the day’s chores. But she was determined to finish her letter to Mrs. Calhoun. She hadn’t written her former employer since beginning her job on the Wheeler ranch. A part of her ached, knowing that Mrs. Calhoun was settled and happy in Philadelphia and she was not with her. She wrote of Elizabeth’s illness and how the family was adjusting to a new normal. She explained how a weakened heart might keep Elizabeth from resuming care of the house and the family for quite some time. She shared numerous tales of Lottie’s adorable antics and Elias’s joy in being a father. Yet she refrained from mentioning Isaac.

Hetty wasn’t sure why she failed to mention Isaac in her letter. He was just her employer after all.
An employer who made her knees weak when he entered the kitchen or said grace at the evening meal. An employer she often caught staring at her as she sewed by the fire in the evenings. An employer whose rugged looks and overwhelming kindness made the ache for a family all the more real.

Hetty tried to ignore her ache for a family while she was working on the Wheeler ranch. They’d done so much to make her feel welcome—so much to make her feel that she was more than someone who worked for them. They shared meals with her, offered their company in the evenings, regularly praised her effort—especially when she made peach cobbler—and allowed her nearly free reign of the house and its contents. They went out of their way to make her comfortable in their home.

Their home.
Hetty knew that, despite their best efforts to welcome her in their lives, this was just a job. This wasn’t her family she was cooking for. It wasn’t her daughter she read to before bed. It wasn’t her husband exchanging glances with her across the yard. She wanted so badly to pretend that it all was real, but the truth of the matter was that she was an impostor. Her growing feelings for Isaac didn’t matter. He was just her employer and she was just a girl with a silly dream. She blew out her lamp and headed to bed, alone as always.

Hetty entered the kitchen as quietly as possible, hoping for a few minutes to herself before the Wheelers woke for the day. She moved quickly to prepare the coffee, knowing both brothers liked their first cup to be hot and strong, and she liked to have it ready when they emerged. The door creaked behind. Hetty turned, startled to see Isaac entering the kitchen. This was early for him to be up and already working on chores.

“Isaac, you scared me. I thought you were still sleeping!” Hetty poured him a cup of the freshly brewed coffee and handed it to him.

“Couldn’t sleep.” He sounded tired.

“Oh. Well, give me a few minutes and I’ll have breakfast ready for you,” Hetty said as she busied herself making griddlecakes and bacon. The kitchen was quiet despite both of them moving about. She couldn’t help glancing over her shoulder. Seeing Isaac take a seat so peacefully at the table made her insides move in waves. He was such a beautiful man—so strong, so gentle. She’d wanted a few minutes to herself this morning, but having him so close made Hetty realize that it wasn’t quiet she craved...it was closeness.
To him
. Occasionally he’d rise before the rest of the house and they’d have a few minutes alone. They never spoke of anything of importance, but in this moment Hetty realized exactly how much she loved these few moments of being alone together.

Before the rest of the family joined them for breakfast, Hetty decided to approach Isaac with a proposition. It was something she’d considered thoroughly for the last two weeks, and she wanted his approval before moving forward with her plan. “Isaac, do you mind if I talk to you about something?”

Isaac could tell she was nervous. He didn’t like when she felt the need to be meek—especially around him. He knew that when she was in her element—taking care of all of them—she was anything but docile. She was kind and full of strength, radiating confidence and beauty. He pushed the thought away and invited her to sit with him.

Hetty poured her own cup of coffee, added a little milk, and sat with Isaac at the table. She took a deep breath, working up her nerve.

“Hetty, relax. You can tell me anything.” Isaac reached for her hand, feeling a fire run straight through him.

Hetty looked in his eyes. “I want to help your mother,” she blurted out.

“You are helping her. Every day.”

“No, I am. But I want to do more.” She pulled her hand away knowing she wouldn’t be able to concentrate if she could still feel his touch on her skin. “I want to help you and Elias pay for her medicine.”

Isaac furrowed his brow. “Hetty, you don’t need to do that.”
How did she know they were struggling to find the money to cover the medicine?

“
Please. Hear me out. Mrs. Calhoun was a tough employer, but she was generous. She paid me well, and considering I have no real expenses, I’ve managed to save a bit. It’s not much in the scheme of things, but I think it’s enough to get Elizabeth’s medicine.  I’d like to offer it to you and your brother.” She sat back in her chair, relief flooding through her that she’d managed to get the words out.

Isaac momentarily felt like he couldn’t breathe. This woman was offering her savings to help his mother. She was not only willing to work herself ragged each and every day, but now she was willing to part with what little money she had to make his mother’s health better. Incredible didn’t begin to describe the woman sitting in front of him.

“I...I don’t know what to say,” Isaac mumbled.

“Please say you’ll accept. Your family has been so kind to me. I want to do something to make things better for...you.”

In a split second Isaac rose from his chair, pulled Hetty from hers and wrapped her in an embrace. He surprised himself with the gesture, but in that moment he needed to touch her. He ached to touch her, to feel her softness within his arms. She was so selfless. Her willingness to help his family pushed his heart over the edge. He was falling. Hard. Isaac breathed in the soft rose scent that clung to her hair. He could feel her trepidation to give in to the embrace, but as he began to nuzzle her neck he felt her relax into him. She fit so well against his chest. He knew he shouldn’t give in to the feelings pulsing through him, but all logic flew from his head and he grasped onto his moment of weakness.

Hetty wanted so badly to resist the  strength of his arms, but she couldn’t. When she let herself become swept up in his embrace she finally acknowledged how palpable her loneliness really was. She craved contact...his contact. It had been so long since someone had shown her genuine affection, and she couldn’t resist savoring it for even a fleeting moment. Isaac’s body was so hard pressed against her, his earthy scent overtaking her senses and causing her to feel nearly dizzy in his arms. When he began to nuzzle against her neck she thought she’d lose all feeling in her legs, barely holding her up as it was. Nonetheless, she allowed herself to enjoy it for the moment, knowing full well this was just his way of showing his gratefulness...nothing more. It couldn’t be.

Isaac ran his hands through her hair and leaned close to her ear. “Hetty...” he said, his voice sounding breathy, “Thank you.”

Hetty chose that moment to pull away, knowing if she held on for even a moment more she might just give in to whatever this was. “You’re welcome, Isaac.”

Isaac smiled at her. “I cannot accept the money. It’s incredibly generous of you to offer, but I wouldn’t feel right about using it. You earned it and you should save it.”

Hetty nodded her head. A part of her knew his pride wouldn’t allow him to take the money, but she needed to make the offer.

“I do have one question for you,” Isaac whispered.

She looked in his deep, kind eyes, suddenly nervous of what he might ask of her. “Yes?”

“What are you saving the money for?”

This wasn’t the question Hetty expected. In fact, it was possibly the last thing she’d expected him to ask her. “It doesn’t matter.”

“No, please. It does matter...to me.”

Hetty hesitated. She’d already told him so much of her past. Could she really let him into her dreams for the future? “It was supposed to be for a house.”

“A house?” The answer surprised Isaac.

“Yes, I was saving to someday purchase a small house of my own.” Hetty averted her eyes.
Why is it so hard to tell him?