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Authors: Siân James

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‘I’ll write to her this afternoon,’ Tom promised, ‘though she’ll be very surprised by my letter I’m sure. I don’t suppose she’ll think I’ve ever mentioned her to anyone.’

‘I don’t know about that. When a person realises that something important has happened to them, they usually like to mention it. I’d be surprised if she hasn’t mentioned you to her mother and father.’

‘She has no mother, Nano. Her mother died when she was very young, sixteen I think. And I don’t think you’ll consider her very pretty, either. She’s certainly not beautiful like Catrin. And she’s a bit older than I am too.’

‘Poor motherless child,’ Miss Rees said and shut her eyes so that Tom felt he was dismissed.

‘I feel very embarrassed,’ Tom told Catrin and Lowri later that morning. ‘Miss Rees insists that she’s dying and that her dying wish is to meet May Malcolm who I’d mentioned to her on my embarkation leave years ago – how many years, it seems like a lifetime. What is the poor girl going to think?’

‘She’s going to think that you’d like to see her, and what’s wrong with that? Send her a timetable of trains from London and say your brother-in-law will meet her at any
time. Lowri will make one of her famous raspberry tarts and I’ll cook some ham ready for supper. Good old Nano, I say.’

‘What do you feel for this girl, Tom?’ Josi asked later when he’d heard of Nano’s demand. ‘Is she an ordinary nice girl or is she special?’

‘I’m not too sure, Father. She made a big impression on me and I certainly haven’t forgotten her.’

‘You’ll know when you meet her again,’ Catrin told him. ‘You’re older now and far more mature. I trust your judgement, somehow. Don’t be nervous. You want to see her again and your family is humouring you. That’s all she need think.’

‘She’ll think more than that,’ Josi said. ‘But then, what’s the harm.’

Mari Elen was excited at the prospect of the new lady friend who couldn’t speak Welsh.

‘It’s a good thing I’ve learnt some English,’ she said. ‘She’d be very upset if I couldn’t talk to her. Poor Miss Rees doesn’t have much English but I’ll be able to help her. Isn’t it a good thing that I’m here. How long are we staying, Lowri? I miss my little kitten, Ifor, and my pet duck but I know it’s best I stay here for a while if only to practise my English with Miss May Malcolm.’

It was decided that it was Catrin who should write to Miss Malcolm giving her the news of Tom’s injury – he hadn’t yet told her – and explaining about their old nurse’s stroke and her desire to see Mr Tom’s young lady before she died.

Tom told her about you when he was on embarkation leave because our mother was then dying and he wanted to leave her and Miss Rees with some comforting news before he left. He has impressed upon me that there is nothing between you except that you promised to write to him, that you kept your promise and that he always looked forward to hearing from you. He is going through a very hard time at the moment as his leg had to be amputated at the knee. Knowing my brother as I do, I know it will not be long before he is on horseback again and my husband is also trying to persuade him to buy a motor car. All the same we all feel that it would do him a great deal of good to see a friend who has been so kind to him for the two and a half dreadful years that he was away.

I do hope your father will allow you to travel to the depths of
Wales to see us. We (my husband and I, Father and his second wife Lowri, and their child, Mari Elen, and particularly Miss Nano Rees, a woman in her late seventies who has been our greatest support for as many years as I can remember) do hope they will.

We look forward to meeting you. My husband could meet you at our local railway station, Llanfryn Carmarthenshire, at any time.

We look forward to hearing from you,

Yours faithfully,

Catrin Andrews.

‘I’m Catrin Andrews,’ she thought as she wrote her signature, ‘how extraordinary. And my child will be either Thomas Joshua Andrews or Rachel Mary Andrews. I hope he or she decides to arrive soon. My body is so ungainly. I’m waddling like an old mother goose already. My thighs are huge and rub together whenever I move. Soon I shall be unable to walk at all.’

Miss May Malcolm spent no time in getting back in touch.

Thank you very much for your kind invitation. I’m delighted to hear that Tom is safe. I hadn’t heard from him for several weeks and now, of course, I understand why. Please tell him that I look forward to seeing him and you all very soon. I would like to arrive on Friday evening on the seven fifty train. I trust that this will be convenient.

Tom became pale and agitated when Catrin read him the letter. ‘What an ordeal for the poor girl,’ he said. ‘I wonder if she realises what a ruin of a man she’s coming to meet.’

‘Stop putting yourself down,’ Catrin said. ‘You’re a handsome man in your prime and if she doesn’t snap you up, there are plenty of young girls around here who will.’

‘Certainly,’ his father said. ‘I’m sure a wounded soldier is high on the list of every young female of marriageable age. Our maids now, Lottie and Maudie, can’t take their eyes off you and they’re both handsome girls. You could do worse.’

‘Well, Miss Rees,’ Josi told Nano later that morning, ‘May Malcolm is travelling all the way from London especially to see you on Friday evening. If you approve of her then I’m prepared to give her my blessing and Lowri’s. Perhaps Hendre Ddu will have its first English mistress in its long history.’

‘You won’t hear me say a word against the English. There are plenty of Welshmen, and women too, who are far from perfect.’

‘I agree with you there. I myself am one of them, but after a long period of remorse I am striving towards some form of inner peace.’

‘You’re a decent man, Mr Ifans, though I never thought you were good enough for my dearest Rachel.’

‘I haven’t slept a wink,’ Tom confessed the next morning. ‘I’m just not good enough for her. I’m sorry to be putting her through the ordeal of coming here and meeting us all.’

‘What’s wrong with us? We’re a fairly civilised family and we have a lovely home. And I made it clear that you merely want to see her to resume your friendship. What sort of ordeal is that?’

‘Oh, Catrin,’ Lowri said, ‘I think she’s very brave to travel down here. I don’t think I could do it even if I was in love with Mr Tom.’ Lowri blushed as she realised what she’d said.

‘I think you were a little in love with me once, Lowri,’ Tom said, ‘but then in my absence, my father stepped in and captured you for himself.’

On Friday morning, Graham Andrews joined them after his visit to Miss Rees. ‘She’s a different woman, this morning,’ he said. ‘She tells me that she means to get up in the afternoon to make some Welsh cakes and a few loaves of bara brith.’

‘And will she?’ Josi asked him.

‘No,’ he said, ‘but it shows that she’s rallying. She may last the summer yet. Of course you can depend on me to meet the seven-fifty train. Catrin, try not to over-do things today. With all the work I have in the hospital, I simply won’t have time to deliver a baby this week. Take it easy, don’t walk too far, don’t eat too much and remember, nothing spiced.’

He kissed his wife and left them.

‘I can handle the supper without any help from you,’ Lowri said. ‘We’ve got new potatoes and new beans and I’ll start baking the ham – in brown sugar and honey – Nano’s old recipe, later on this morning. Would you like to order a pudding, Tom? Maudie assures me she can manage the pudding.’

‘Strawberry cheesecake and cream, I think,’ Tom said after some serious deliberation.

Josi broke in. ‘Tom, Graham’s been having a word with me. He is adamant that the only way for you to stop having such dreadful nightmares is to share some of the horrors with us. I beg you to try, Tom. Not one of us is strong enough to put up with those terrible screams. It mustn’t happen while May Malcolm is here. Why don’t we go to sit in the orchard and you can try to talk things over with me. I’d like to help you, son, if I can.’

‘Thank you, Father, but I think it’s too soon,’ Tom said. ‘I’m going to try to fill my head with lovely country scenes today; the men haymaking, the women carrying out the tea trays and the larks singing. I don’t believe in war today. When the bad times come again, as they will, I may well be glad to take up your offer.’

Mari Elen piped up. ‘When you had that bad dream, Tom, I heard you and wet the bed. Father wasn’t too pleased but Lowri said he was to go downstairs to fetch me a cup of milk and two biscuits. But he didn’t bring the ones I like, the ones with pink icing on the top. It’s not so good for me now that you are here and Miss Rees is ill.’

‘Hadn’t you better visit Miss Rees?’ Lowri suggested, ‘but remember you mustn’t wake her if she’s asleep.’

‘I wonder if she would like some of those biscuits with pink icing on the top. Shall I look for some for her?’

‘By all means,’ Catrin said, ‘Two for you and two for her, but no more.’

‘Two is good but three is better,’ Mari Elen said. ‘All the same, two each. Thank you. And may I have some ginger beer from the pantry?’

Catrin sighed. ‘I’ll come with you to pour some. You’ve only just finished your breakfast Mari Elen. How can you be hungry again so soon?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘Are you happy here?’ Catrin asked her, ‘or would you prefer to be home in Cefn Hebog?’

‘I miss my pet duck and my dear little kitten. Dogs are all very well but they don’t climb on your lap, do they, or sit on your head.’

‘I’m sure we could fetch your kitten. I’ll ask Graham to go up there tomorrow morning.’

Poor Graham had a hard time as he drove May from the station that evening; she seemed too shy to speak a word. Was she apprehensive or merely exhausted after the journey? He felt the ordeal of meeting the family would really finish her off. How had Tom managed to elicit the promise of writing from such a very shy girl? His admiration for his brother-in-law increased. He was determined that he and Catrin would return to their home that evening after supper, so that there should only be Josi, Lowri and Tom himself left there. He hoped Mari Elen would already have been put to bed, but knew that there was little chance of that; not one of them would have managed to send her upstairs. He was fond enough of Mari Elen but he seemed to be the only one – with the possible exception of Miss Rees – who was aware of how strong minded and spoilt she was. He hoped Catrin would not be as indulgent towards their own child. He had been brought up in a very strict Scottish manse where children were never asked what they wanted to do, but very firmly told what was expected of them.

He pulled up in front of the house so that May could appreciate what a beautiful place it was. She looked up at the old bricks, a rosy pink in the sun-drenched evening and gasped. ‘I never expected this,’ she said. ‘From his letters, I thought Tom lived in quite a modest farmhouse. This is really beautiful.’

He took her in by the front door and into the parlwr. There was no sign of anyone. He pushed open the door into the dining room, the table was not even laid.

At that moment Lowri flew downstairs. She greeted May with great warmth as though they were already firm friends. ‘Catrin is having her baby,’ she told them. ‘Yes, it’s all started and we’re all so excited. Tom has been sitting with her while Josi was out finishing the milking but now that you’re back, Tom can come down. I’ll fetch him,’ she told May. ‘Can I take your coat? I’m so sorry I don’t seem to have anything done so far. We’ve all been up with Catrin. She’s in one of her funny moods. She’s not really so far on in labour as she thinks, apparently it’s only just beginning. But at the moment she wants all of us with her, she says. Mrs Ifans, Mrs Evans I mean, her mother, used to say she was as highly strung as a prize-winning filly. Whenever she was going out to a party or a ball I was sent to sit with her all the afternoon and we used to have a lovely time dressing up and trying out different hairstyles. Oh, I’m talking too much, I’m excited as well. I’ll send Tom now. He can’t manage the stairs very well,’ she told May, ‘but you’ll understand that, I know. Shall I take you to the bathroom? Or to your bedroom?’

‘No, I’ll wait here for Tom,’ she said. ‘And please give Catrin my best wishes.’

Before Tom had got down, Josi arrived from the kitchen and introduced himself. ‘Would you like to come up to see Catrin?’ he asked her. ‘I know she’s longing to see you. And don’t worry, I don’t think the baby will be born today or even tomorrow morning. Catrin is just enjoying all the attention. I don’t think she’s had one proper pain yet, but I don’t like to tell her that.’

Tom arrived downstairs and Lowri and Josi excused themselves and returned to Catrin. ‘What a lovely girl,’ Lowri said. ‘What are we going to give her for supper? I think it will have to be ham sandwiches and I haven’t had time to bake any bread today so it’ll have to be ham sandwiches with yesterday’s bread. But she’ll understand won’t she? She seems like family already.’

‘She looks so like Rachel when I first met her. Tom is marrying his mother, I’m afraid. He always doted on her.’

‘No, he told me that you were the one who meant most to him but that Catrin was always your favourite.’

‘Nonsense, nonsense,’ Josi said, ‘I was nothing to him. He was a Morgan, through and through. Catrin, I really think you ought to get up. Lying in bed will only slow down your delivery. I know about these things. Take cows now, they’re
always better off if they stand up and try to munch a little hay.’

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