Resplendent (4 page)

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

“I’m not with Carmin. She’s just my date…” I stopped talking when I saw her eyebrow rise and she took a step back.

Shit.
I didn’t want to sound like a dick, but Carmin wasn’t my girlfriend. She didn’t mean anything to me.

I knew what that eyebrow meant though. Family, girl code, and all that shit.

I tried to backtrack. “She’s my date, but we’re just friends. She knows that.”

I tried to sound confident in what I was saying but the more I thought about it, the more I realized
I didn’t
know if she did or not. If she’d been talking to Peach about me then I needed to make it very clear to her before the end of the night where we stood.

Her face softened, but she didn’t look all that convinced.

“Well either way, I didn’t mean for it to come across as flirting.” She glanced down and averted her eyes.

“I wouldn’t think anything bad about it if you were. Actually, I wouldn’t think bad about you in general,” I assured her.

Her luscious lips curved upwards in a smile. It was small but still a smile.

“Where’s my drink?” Carmin asked, coming up behind me and wrapping her arms tight around my waist. I turned sideways and gave her the cup in my hand. I had already forgotten the plan was to get us
both
drinks, so I’d just poured one for myself. By the time I looked for Savannah again, she was dancing with Adam.
That fucker.
He already had his Grubby Palms behind her back—a little too low, if you asked me. He was a dickhead for touching her that way. They’d
just
met for crying out loud! And the way he was leaning in to whisper what I bet were some panty dropping lines was a sleazy move, even for him. I’d never do that—to her.

“You look like you need this drink more than I do.” Carmin’s voice distracted me.

I looked down at her and realized she wasn’t dancing. Instead, she was just standing in front of me with one hand on her hip. “Anything you want to share with the class?”

“The class?” I asked. Not the class, I just wanted to warn Adam not to try anything with Peach. Ever.

“Everyone except Adam and Savannah can see the shit face you’re wearing right now.”

I quickly wrapped my arm around her shoulders and turned toward the sofa. I didn’t know I was being that obvious. I normally didn’t have a problem expressing myself, but right now I had to keep it cool and let Carmin loose gently. I knew the school they went to was not far from me—it would be easy to keep in touch. I sat Carmin down and tried to think of the best way to approach this. She was already too clingy. I wouldn’t be able to pretend having any feelings for her if we went on another date.

I had to do this right, so I could get to know Peach better. We just needed time. Just a little bit of time, that was all.

It’d been three months since I met Andres. When I gave Adam my number at the end of the night, I was surprised to see it was Andres who kept calling me. He’d asked me out as friends a few times and I’d finally agreed to see him. Carmin had been quiet about him, and I didn’t know what his game was. I peeked into Lola’s bedroom and saw her lying down, sorting through a magazine. She had her dark black hair pulled up in a bun and had her reading glasses on. Completely absorbed in an article, she hadn’t noticed me at the door. I softly tapped my fingers on her door before swiftly walking in and plopping myself down on her bed. She smiled down at me as I snuggled close and rested my head next to her belly, face up. She lifted strands of my hair and began playing with them.

“Madrina?” I asked and her hand stopped for a second when she heard the hesitation in my voice.

“Mmm?” she asked.

“Do you remember what my parents were like when they were together?” I avoided her gaze as I looked up at the ceiling but I could feel her eyes on me.

“I do. They were something else,” she answered and then began trailing her fingers over my forehead. My eyelids fluttered closed.

“What does that mean? Something else?” I placed my hand on my stomach and relaxed with her touch.

“It means I’d never seen a relationship like theirs before. Your mother was outspoken and stubborn, but brilliant and hard working. Your dad was more quiet and reserved, but always put family first. They worked well together.”

Her words swirled around in my head before settling and I asked another question, because I wanted to know.

“How will I know if I find a love like theirs?”

She sighed and I finally opened my eyes to look at her.

“Well, there are different types of love I think. It’s not so black and white.”

I frowned. “So there’s no way to know?”

She smiled a sad smile. “I think you’ll know, it just takes time. When you realize you’re willing to give yourself completely to that other person. You’ll know when you can’t stop thinking about him during the time that you’re apart, and you still get excited to hear his voice. When you’d rather defend him than defend yourself. Love is acceptance, because we all have flaws, and you won’t mind living with each one of his.”

“Do you still love Carmin’s dad?” I asked hoping I wouldn’t offend her. My hand rested on hers.

“I do still care about him and wish him well, but no. I think we were more comfortable with each other and just going through the motions. When he walked out on us, I was angry. And it took me a long time to realize that I wasn’t angry because I loved him. I was angry because he chose to not help his family. I missed his help.”

I glanced back at the ceiling and saw a blurry image of my parents facing each other. It was on my 11
^th
birthday party before they sang me happy birthday. My dad wiped her bangs back and kissed her on the forehead. I smiled.

“Do you think you’re in love?” Lola asked, and teasingly swiped at the corner of my mouth.

“I was thinking about my parents.”
Well, it’s true
.

“What about that boy you’re always texting back and forth?” She probed.

I blushed. There was only one boy.

“He’s just a friend,” I giggled. I couldn’t contain it.

“And does this
friend
have a name?” I looked at Lola and she raised an eyebrow. “Hmm?”

Jeez, so persistent.

“Andres,” I answered without thinking and instantly regretted it. What would Carmin think if Lola slipped and told her? “He’s really just a friend,” I insisted.
A very cute friend
.

“Okay, that’s how good relationships start anyways.” She leaned down and placed a kiss on my forehead. “Go get dressed so we can get going.”

I let out a breath of relief and got up from the bed.

“Carmin, I’m borrowing your shoes!” I called out and slipped my feet into the dark brown wedges. I straightened my shoulders and smoothed the creases of my green striped top.

“Wow, you look hot!” Carmin said from the doorway. I glanced at her through the mirror and smiled.

“You think so? It’s not too much?”

Carmin shook her head and walked to the closet we shared to put on her shoes.

“You know these boys just want us to be dressed up and beautified every second of the day.”

My eyebrows pinched together at the thought and I looked again at myself in the mirror. I was fine with dressing up once in a while, but sometimes, I just wanted my yoga pants and flats.

“Here.” Carmin’s outstretched palm was in front of me and I looked down to see a tube of lip gloss. “Wear this shade tonight. It’ll look great on you with your skin tone.”

I grabbed it and slicked it on while Carmin looked for her purse. “Thanks,” I told her before I puckered my lips.

We stood side by side for a final inspection. I pulled the clasp of my necklace toward the back of my neck and took in Carmin’s features. She was a heart breaker. Her thick, curly hair framed her face nicely and she wore a soft pink shiny lip gloss, and smoky eyes.

Carmin caught my eye and did a little shimmy before she bumped her hip against mine. “Andres is going to go crazy when he sees me in these jeans,” she said smugly.

Andres?
I thought to myself, my fingers twisting at the ends of my hair.

Carmin ran her hand over the denim. “These are the same pair he saw me wear the night I met him. He wouldn’t stop grabbing my ass.”

I wasn’t sure what to say, so I stayed quiet. Carmin wrapped her arms around my shoulder and steered us out of the room. A knot formed in my belly at her words.

Andres and I talked
at least
twice a week—even though we hadn’t seen each other in a little over three months. He was the one that had told me over the weekend to come over tonight. Had he really called to hang out with Carmin? It didn’t make sense to me. Andres didn’t seem like the type to need others to help him with a hook up. Maybe he
was
trying to play us both. I grabbed my purse and replayed our conversation in my head, but I couldn’t for the life of me recall him mentioning Carmin. Still, Carmin was clearly really into him.

“You girls ready?” Lola said behind me and jingled her keys.

“Yep!” Carmin answered. Lola looked over at me and I nodded—my throat dry. I didn’t want to speak and have my voice come out like a croak.

When I’d asked if we could go over to his house on a school night, Lola agreed as long as she could drop us off and pick us up. Carmin had been mortified to hear that her mother had called Andres and asked to speak to his father, but I assured her Andres didn’t think anything of it. It probably had something to do with the fact that his family was Cuban and they were notorious for being just as strict as Colombians.

“You okay, Savannah?” Lola’s eyes peeked at me through the rearview mirror. “You’re frowning.”

Carmin turned back and smiled. “She’s probably nervous about seeing Adam again.”

Not really.
I averted my eyes and started to pick off my nail polish.

Lola spoke up again, “Adam? I thought his name was Andres?” I cringed.

Carmin looked at her mom and rolled her eyes. “No,
Mami
. Andres is my guy. Adam is the one that was dancing with Savannah at the party.”

I stopped my picking and noticed a dull throb had begun in my forehead.

“
Your
guy?” I couldn’t help but ask for clarification. I hadn’t heard Carmin talk to him on the phone once and we shared a room!

Carmin looked back at her. “Well, you know what I mean. The guy I’m interested in. I
did
see him first. I think we have really good chemistry, if you catch my drift.” She winked at me but all I could do was smile meekly. She was right—she
had
seen him first. A jealous bug crawled in my stomach.

Lola saw the wink. “What
do
you mean exactly, Carmin?”

Carmin stared at her blankly. “We’d get along, of course, Mami.”

“Mmm hmm.” My godmother murmured as I looked out the window to see she’d turned onto Andres’ street.

You’d get along with any guy if you promised to spread your legs for him.
The taste of my thought was as bitter as a ripe grapefruit.

“Besides, Savannah would never go after the same guy I was already interested in. Right, sis?” She turned her head and smiled at me, her head lowered so I could see her eyes behind her sunglasses. I immediately chastised myself for my ugly thoughts and smiled back at her. “Of course not,” I answered. A true sister would never do that.

I let out a small breath and turned my head to look at all the passing townhouses. My heartbeat picked up as we came to a stop at the end of the street. Andres’ two-story house looked back at me. The sun shone on pale gray paint and an autumn wreath hung on a single front door the color of cornflower. The house gave off a calming effect, and I immediately fell in love with it.

Carmin and I rushed out and said our goodbyes to Lola.

“Curfew is nine o’clock!” She called out after us, just before closing the car door. We waved and went up the cobblestone walkway.

“Okay, girl check. How do I look?” Carmin asked, wiggling her eyebrows.