Reshaping It All (5 page)

I was blessed with my share of tears too. An even greater blessing was having a mom whose arms were always open to me and who was ready with a listening ear. I remember running into those arms when I was about thirteen years old. I was suffering from a serious addiction at the time—Kool-Aid. In those days the thing to do was to buy packets of presweetened Kool-Aid, fill up a baggy and lick to your heart's content. Most kids had a stash at home they could dig into, but I had to hide mine in a backpack or keep the canister at school. It was kind of gross actually when you consider that I dipped my finger into the bag and licked it repeatedly throughout the day.

Gross wasn't my concern at the time; the sugar rush was. After several weeks of doing this, the daily sugar crash took its toll on me until finally I broke down, crying in Mom's arms. I was unhappy with how I felt and, at the tender age of thirteen, also with how I looked. I wanted and needed a change.

Mom has struggled with weight her entire life. It's always been a battle for her to fight the draw toward the food she loves. Bridgette and Melissa were older than me, and both of them had a few pounds to lose. Collectively we decided to join a popular weight-loss plan, which involved prepackaged dehydrated meals, much like astronaut food to me. I didn't really like adding water to dehydrated food or watching it come to life in the microwave, but it taught me portion control. Bridgette responded well to the diet and got the most out of it. Like I always say, different methods of weight loss work for different people, but this particular one wasn't working for me.

As I take you through this book, my hope is to encourage you to get off the fence, find healthy but satisfying ways to take off the weight, and build on a firm foundation that you can stand on for life. I'll hang on to the back of your bike for a while, but soon you'll be riding alone. There is a place of freedom, when the trying just becomes living. It becomes smooth sailing from that moment on, when you finally have wings to soar.

Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. (Matt. 7:24–25)

The Pantry

CHOCKED-FULL OF FOOD FOR THOUGHT

The Main Ingredient

Confusion about our bodies and our health only leads to ongoing frustration. We need to stop the cycle of yoyo dieting and settle on a healthy way to live. There is a better alternative than tasteless yet healthy food. And there's also a better alternative to a diet filled with fast food and sugary treats. It's delicious food that works to the benefit of our bodies. With a deeper understanding of what works to our benefit, we increase our chance at success.

A Slice of Advice

Dear Candace,

I've seen photos of your family, and you're all beautiful. Your daughter is looking like a miniature you. So cute! You all look so radiant it's amazing. I read somewhere online (maybe Twitter?) that your children love sushi. I couldn't believe it because I can barely get mine to like tuna.

I want to train my children to eat healthier food. I try to eliminate sugary sweats and oversweetened cereals as much as I can, but my husband and I are at a constant battle on this one. He thinks that if we deprive them of good food they will just want it all the more. Any advice you can give us?

—Janelle

Dear Janelle,

Thanks for your kind words. I think my kids are radiant too! Hopefully it's a bit of the Lord shining through, but I do believe it's also because of what they are eating.

I think your husband is viewing healthy food as the enemy, so maybe you can help him discover tasty choices that are good for us too. I encourage you to try some of the recipes in this book and experiment a little on your own to offer some good alternatives.

Treats aren't the enemy either. It's okay to have them occasionally and in moderation. But keep a close eye so they don't overindulge. Just like us their hearts need to be trained to listen to their heads, but for now they're listening to you for that guidance. So grab the opportunity to guide them well.

There's nothing wrong with rules. In fact many rules are there to save our lives, but telling someone to live according to them and giving them a reason to live that way are two entirely different things. One is preaching; the other is teaching. Set healthy boundaries for them, and let them know why you are doing it.

They might not appreciate having to eat asparagus as a side dish, but encourage them to have a bite. Who knows—they might like it! Get them to try it again the next time you make it because their taste buds are continually changing.

Hope that helps!

—Candace

A Pinch of Practicality

Eating good food is one thing. Dining well is another. On the next page are five practical tips for eating that will help you slow down and improve your dining experience:

1. Eye your food first. Does it look like too much? Decide on a smaller portion and stay with your choice unless you find you're not satisfied. You can always go back for a little bit more if need be.

2.Use smaller plates. Smaller plates give us the illusion of larger portions, and larger portions convince us we're satisfied. Our ancestors ate off dishes that are much smaller than we have become accustomed to.

3.Have a glass of cold water with your meal and take sips often. Drinking water will help you slow down and enjoy your food.

4.Engage in conversation if you are dining with others. The fellowship is equally as important as the food, so sit back and listen between bites. Don't worry, your plate isn't leaving.

5.Chew your food slowly. The longer you take to eat a meal, the less food you will consume. And by eating slower, you will also savor the flavor.

Food for Thought

• A double minded man is unstable in all his ways. (James 1:8 KJV)

• Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. (Matt. 7:24–25)

The Candy Dish

People who soar are those who refuse to sit back, sigh and wish things would change. They neither complain of their lot nor passively dream of some distant ship coming in. Rather, they visualize in their minds that they are not quitters; they will not allow life's circumstances to push them down and hold them under. —Charles R. Swindoll

From My Stove to Yours

Turkey Tacos

Serves 4

Ingredients

1 pound ground turkey (or lean beef)

1 15½ ounce can black beans, drained and rinsed

1 package flour or corn tortillas

Lettuce, shredded

Tomatoes, diced

1 bag of shredded cheddar or Mexican cheese blend

Directions

Brown the ground turkey or beef in a pan over medium heat until cooked through.

Heat beans as directed.

Add a scoop of meat to a warmed tortilla. Add beans or place them on the side. Serve with shredded lettuce, tomatoes, cheese, and fresh salsa.

Top with fresh salsa:

1 diced tomato

Chopped purple onion, to taste

Chopped cilantro, to taste

Salt and pepper

FOUR

Dad's Infinity and Beyond

One of the perks of acting at such a young age is that I earned a tremendous amount of money for such a young person growing up. You'd have thought that a girl in my position would have been living in the lap of luxury, wearing the best fashion money could buy and driving the finest of cars, but Dad had other plans for my life.

My father earned his living teaching public middle school, math and physical education, while raising a family of six. He believed people should work hard for the things they have, and so he instilled that idea in us. He could see that hard work was not only a prerequisite for success but that it was also a prerequisite for strong character. Struggling for the things we get teaches us the all-important lesson of self-discipline while it strengthens our body and spirit. It wasn't enough for us to achieve a level of success in this world; our parents wanted us to reach our full potential as people who are strong in spirit and mind.

Although my brother Kirk and I were in a position to do it, Dad wasn't comfortable with the idea of any sixteen-year-old blowing truckloads of cash. The success of
Full House
and
Growing Pains
was phenomenal, but that wasn't about to change the dynamics of our all-American family. Maintaining a level of normalcy at home was also important. Whether I appeared on the cover of
Brio
magazine, or walked the red carpet that day, behind closed doors we were a family living much like everyone else. I still squabbled with my sisters when washing the dishes and waited in line for the bathroom in a house with three siblings. My rise to success didn't change the atmosphere of our family or offer me a free pass from hard work.

Buying my first car was a bit of a battle. Knowing how much I enjoyed acting, Dad didn't think of it as "earning" in the sense of hard work. I enjoyed being on the set every day and loved acting, so it wasn't as though I was working in a busy supermarket dealing with angry customers, crying babies, and cleanups on aisle four. He knew it was income, but he still wanted me to learn the value of setting a goal, counting the cost, weighing the gain, and doing the legwork it takes in reaching that goal. It was time to sit down and formulate a plan.

Taking a part-time job at a restaurant wasn't an option for me, so we got a little creative. During the height of the success of
Full House,
I was asked to attend massive events nationwide where I did autograph signings and public appearances mainly at shopping malls or civic arenas. These events weren't nearly as glamorous for me as you'd think and were particularly exhausting. Although it was great to meet my fans, trying to sign posters and take photos with up to twenty-five thousand people at an event could get seriously overwhelming. But income from those events and sales from merchandise allowed me that additional hard-earned money. My dad agreed that once I had enough money earned from those weekends, I could purchase the car, so I got to work. After several months a black Nissan Pathfinder rolled off the lot and into my life. I loved that SUV!

About a year or two later the same dealership had a great price on an Infiniti Q45, a luxury sedan that my dad had his eye on but couldn't afford. I knew without a doubt that I wanted to buy it for him, and after talking it over with Mom, she agreed to let me.

I never considered it a gift from me. Since I was part of a family, it was from all of us kids, the way I knew it should be. Together we wrapped the car in a large red ribbon, tucked it into the garage, and waited for Dad to get back from school.

It was an emotional moment for all of us when the door finally opened and we looked at his face. Humble and grateful, the tears stung his eyes. My parents chose to live a life as normal as they possibly could so that we might learn the value of setting and reaching a goal. We learned that a goal itself is not to be desired but rather that value is found in the effort.

By learning the hard way, Dad taught me five important steps in reaching my goals:

1. Envision your goal.

2. Formulate a plan.

3. Consider the gain.

4. Count the cost.

5. Do the necessary work to achieve it.

Both planning our goals and the means of getting there gives us a greater chance at success than living impulsively would. When things are organized and on schedule, the likelihood of success is increased. Unexpected obstacles often stand in our way, but if we invest in foresight and consider the ways we will deal with each hurdle, we are leaning on wisdom rather than chance.

In
The Ultimate Weight Solution: The 7 Keys to Weight Loss Freedom,
Dr. Phil McGraw writes,

Because I have counseled so many overweight patients, I can tell you with absolute certainty why some people stay fit and others do not. If someone is successful in keeping weight off for five, ten, twenty, or more years, they have carefully planned thoughtful goals that they hold to and live by.
¹

The Bible also reminds us to consider carefully our plans before we set out to build: "Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Will he not first sit down and estimate the cost to see if he has enough money to complete it? For if he lays the foundation and is not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule him, saying, 'This fellow began to build and was not able to finish'" (Luke 14:28–30).

In that passage Jesus was pointing out the cost of being a disciple. Life will offer us a thousand and one reasons we shouldn't follow Christ, but those who have built their faith on conviction won't give up because they have counted the cost beforehand and their eyes are fixed on the goal ahead. The same principle should apply to the important life goals we set. We consider the pros and cons
before
we start; then we map out a reasonable plan and stick to it.

The empowering words "first sit down and estimate the cost" can revitalize any life when we put them in action. If we've mapped out a solid plan, we have a healthy chance of reaching the goal, and of course success will also depend on whether you're doing all that you humanly can to adhere to the rules. Human effort is all that's ever expected of us, and it's all we should ever expect from ourselves.

Do you have a recipe for success? Have you carefully considered your weight-loss goal and detailed the means you'll take in getting there? If you haven't taken that important step, I urge you to grab a pen and paper—a pretty little journal if you have one—and answer the three following questions in detail: