Relatively Rainey (15 page)

The image of skeletal remains on an autopsy table replaced the one of the ravaged cottage.

“On November 31, 2014, the skeletal remains of Dr. John Taylor were recovered from a drainage pond near the Raleigh-Durham Airport, which answered the question of what had become of him. None of JW Wilson’s other victims have surfaced, but we are confident there are at least four more bodies somewhere in the Triangle area of North Carolina.”

Rainey’s throat became dry and she stopped to sip from the water bottle on the podium. This was the hard part, admitting the consequences of her errors. Danny did not interrupt this time. He waited quietly at his podium. He knew what she had to say. That late night phone call to Danny was one she would never forget.

She cleared her throat and began. “I had spent years burying the past. The compartmentalization I learned as a member of the BAU, which made me damn good at my job, was also nearly my undoing. When John Taylor’s body was discovered, the mental boxes where I stored the bits and pieces of memory from the night of my attack flew open. Nightmare images flooded my dreams, more vivid than ever before. Lost details surfaced and then I saw what I had refused to remember.”

Here it was, the moment of truth. Rainey looked out at the audience and admitted the proof of the costly error she had made.

“Had I undergone the recommended treatment plan—had I allowed my teammates to question me about my attack and aided in the investigation—had I not silenced my mind with alcohol, distracted it by any means possible in order to forget—I may have saved lives and prevented the suffering of others. Before JW Wilson escaped the night of my abduction, he turned back to look at me and took off the mask. I saw him. He knew I saw him. That is the real reason he came after me again and again. Choosing to compartmentalize the memories and lock them away forever nearly cost me everything. It did cost the lives of two agents and an innocent man. It is also the source of the guilt and self-doubt that plagues me now.”

Danny spoke softly into his microphone. “Rainey came to me for help. I believe that was the first step in her recovery. We came to the conclusion that her journey needed to begin here, among her former colleagues, people who would understand and possibly benefit from her experience.” He smiled over at Rainey. “I think it is a brave thing to stand here, admitting one’s flaws.”

Rainey changed the image on the screen to show two young agents seated proudly in front of the FBI seal and the American flag, just as she had been so many years ago.

“Three families paid for the mishandling of my trauma and the Bureau lost two fine young agents, Reed Hancock and Lee Watson. For the pain my refusal to seek treatment may have caused, I am truly sorry. I can only hope that by coming here today, I will have raised awareness of the importance of relying on each other and the Bureau support system in times of mental stress. The ability to compartmentalize our lives into little mental boxes is a necessary skill, when one is exposed to unconscionable human depravity. It can also be detrimental to mental health when those boxes explode open without warning. Talk to someone. Unpack your boxes.”

She tapped the remote, filling the screen behind her with the FBI seal.

“My time in the Bureau was the culmination of a lifelong dream, one I’m sure many of you shared. I can’t remember not wanting to be an FBI agent. I am extremely proud to have worn those three letters on my chest and to have worked with the men and women who exemplify the motto—Fidelity, Bravery, Integrity. Thank you for taking the time to help me on my journey to recovery. It has been an honor to speak with you today.”

She paused. The room was silent. Rainey was sure she could hear the audience members breathing for what felt like minutes but was only seconds.

Finally a voice from the middle of the room asked, “What happened to Katie Wilson?”

Rainey hit the button on the remote.

“Well, despite my flaws Katie married me. This was the Bell-Meyers family Christmas card this year.” Rainey pointed at the picture of her and Katie laughing while helping the triplets decorate the tree. “These are our three-year-old triplets, Mack, Timothy, and Weather. Sometimes even tragic stories have happy endings.”

The audience began to clap and was soon on its feet. With every second the ovation continued, Rainey felt the guilt she’d carried dissipating. She knew it was only the beginning. It was a sweet release nonetheless.

#

Rainey called home on the way to lunch with some of her old teammates. Wendy answered Katie’s cell phone.

“Hey, Rainey. Katie said answer if you called and to tell you first thing not to freak out because she didn’t.”

Rainey chuckled. “I guess I deserve that.”

Wendy laughed, saying, “Yes, you do.”

“Where is the lovely Ms. Meyers?” Rainey inquired.

“She’s upstairs with Grandpa John. He came over to check on her. She’s been puking like a freshman after homecoming.”

“Oooh, that doesn’t sound good. How are the kids doing?”

“You would never know they had been sick. I played with them in the backyard for two hours until it started raining. Your mom and Nana are feeding them now.”

“I really appreciate you spending your days off there. I will be home early in the morning if the weather doesn’t get too bad. They are calling for a big ice storm up here later.”

“No worries,” Wendy said, and then asked, “Hey, you wouldn’t happen to have a file or two on fetish burglars that escalate to murder? Teague is having my class do a case study on the Triangle Terror.”

“There are perks to being my sister. A copy of the case file is locked in my desk. The key is in the cup with the paperclips.”

Wendy chuckled. “That’s some high tech security system there.”

“I just lock it so no one accidently sees something that will scar them for life.”

Wendy laughed louder. “Oh, Katie makes you do it.”

“Yes, and if you keep laughing, I’ll tell her you have a crush on a married man. She’ll ride that one to the ground.”

Danny, who was driving, started chuckling.

Wendy immediately stopped laughing. “Is that Danny? “

“Yes,” Rainey answered, suppressing her own laughter.

Wendy insisted, “You tell him that’s not true.”

“There is nothing wrong with a little hero worship,” Rainey said instead.

“Whatever,” Wendy responded dismissively and changed the subject. “Hey, did you run that story those kids told us by Danny?”

“I haven’t had a chance, but I will. Until then, you need to stay out of that investigation. Powerful people have powerful friends. You don’t want to be in the middle if things get dicey for them. You could lose your badge or worse.”

“Oh, just so you know, Aaron Engel followed me to your neighborhood security gate this morning. I called it in, but he didn’t do anything but stare.” Wendy said, bouncing from subject to subject like she usually did. “I let the guards know what’s up.”

“Tell your supervisor, Wendy. Now that his wife has gone into hiding and he’s facing jail time, Aaron Engel is a desperate man. Do not confront him.”

“Okay, but I have to protect myself, lethally if provoked.”

Rainey heard herself say something that Ernie, Mackie, and Billy Bell had repeated to her ad nauseam.

“Don’t get cocky.”

“Yeah, yeah,” came the reply.

“We’re here at the restaurant. Tell Katie I called and I’ll check back later.”

“Okay. I’ll tell her, but I’ll probably send a note with her mother. Let’s just say, it isn’t pretty, not pretty at all.”

“All right. Talk to you soon. Bye.”

Rainey hung up before Wendy could go into detail about Katie’s viral emissions. On the one hand, she felt a pang of guilt for not being there. On the other, she couldn’t be happier to be hundreds of miles away.

#

Roger pulled out a chair for Rainey, after giving her a hug.

“It’s good to see you,” he said in his soft baritone.

He was a little grayer around the temples and resembled Harry Belafonte even more as he had aged. She’d known him the longest of her former teammates.

“It’s good to see you, too,” Rainey said, returning his smile. “How’s life treating you?”

“I’m retiring to Florida next month,” he said, wearing a broad grin. “Monique is already down there. Got a house right on the beach.”

“I can tell you’re shaken up about that,” Rainey said with a chuckle.

She didn’t sit because Paula was making her way around the private dining room table, swooping in for a hug.

She whispered in Rainey’s ear. “I’m proud of you. That took guts.” She pulled back and looked into Rainey’s eyes. “But don’t let me hear you take sole responsibility for what happened to those agents ever again. There were other people involved, including myself, who should have put a few things together without your input. We all missed things.”

Rainey hugged her again. “Thank you, Paula. How’s Julian? He’s almost four, isn’t he?”

“Yes,” Paula answered, whipping out her phone to show Rainey a picture. “He’s growing like a weed. His daddy is convinced he’s going to be the next LeBron. Look at him dunking that nerf ball.”

“He’s precious,” Rainey commented before being bear-hugged from behind.

“Rainey Bell, I’ve missed you.”

She turned around and hugged the man standing behind her. “Curtis, you are still cherub cheeked and happy. How the hell do you do it?”

“I love my job. I love my wife. Life is good.” The young man, who once was an Intern assigned to shadow Rainey, beamed at her with his answer. He worked with the team now but had never lost his youthful exuberance. The team needed happy people mixed among the more solemn personalities.

James, the technology specialist who traveled with the team, followed Curtis to the table. He slapped him on the shoulder, saying, “Mr. Happy is in the house, ladies and gentlemen,” indicating how the rest of the team dealt with Curtis’s incessant cheerfulness. He extended his hand to Rainey and gave her a backslapping bro-hug. “Good to see you, Rainey.”

“You too, James.”

Danny suggested, “Let’s have a seat.” And to the waiter standing by, he said, “We have one more. She should be here—”

They heard her coming before she appeared in the door.

“I am at lunch. I will get back to you when I get back to you. You’re new. So let me give you some advice. Don’t be bitchy. Bitchy will get you nowhere. Ask around. I’m the biggest bitch in town.”

Melatiah Brooks, as round as she was tall, which wasn’t tall at all, walked into the room like she owned it. Brooks, as she was known, told Rainey once that if she demanded respect, it was more forthcoming. “Short, fat, African American, and a female computer nerd—I’d have a lot of prejudices to overcome if I gave a shit what people thought,” she had explained to Rainey. She got away with her sharp tongue and occasional hostile attitude because Brooks was one of the best technical analysts in the Communication and Information Technology Unit at Quantico.

“Rainey Bell, how are my babies?” Brooks wrapped Rainey in her arms and squeezed hard.

Rainey grunted at the sudden thrust of her diaphragm, answering only after she had been released. “They are recovered from the intestinal hell they put us through and on the loose again. Thank you for sending the stuffed animals last week. They loved them.”

“You kiss those cheeks for me and tell them Auntie Brooks will be down to see them soon.”

“Well, now that we’re all here,” Danny said. “Shall we have a seat?”

The waiter busied himself with water pouring while reviewing the special of the day menu with his guests. He took everyone’s order over the small talk at the table, during which Rainey found out Curtis and his wife were expecting a second child. They had a two-year-old girl they named Beatrice since Rainey had seen him last. Paula spoke of having another child. Rainey passed around phones, including her own, participating in the proud parent picture parade. James and Brooks talked shop about a new program algorithm. Roger wanted to buy a fishing boat and planned to take up underwater photography. Danny was the only one not involved in a conversation. He watched Rainey interact with her friends. She saw him smile a few times and he commented once or twice, but she could feel him analyzing her behavior. She expected no less.

The food was served and Danny asked the waiter to leave the tea and water. They would serve themselves.

“We’ll open this if we need you,” he said and closed the door as the confused young man exited. After returning to his seat, while the others, including Rainey, dug into their plates, he began to speak.

“I asked you here because I think Rainey could benefit from your unique perspectives.”

Rainey swallowed the bite of salad in her mouth and started to speak, but Danny raised his hand to stop her.

“Hear me out,” he said to her.

Rainey acquiesced and waited to hear what Danny had to say.

“Rainey seems to be suffering from self-doubt concerning her behavioral analysis skills. After all, in the last six years, she’s been abducted and raped by a man she knew and did not recognize as a psychopath until he almost killed her again. She found herself staring down the barrel of a gun when she missed identifying the partner of another. Then she let a dangerous woman into her home to guard her precious family. Last spring, she willingly got into a vehicle with a woman who was intent on killing her and never saw it coming.”

“Well, when you put it like that, it does appear I’m not a very good analyst,” Rainey commented.

“In the interest of fairness,” Paula said, “while that woman was in her home, Rainey was saving Bladen Asher’s life. And we were all in the room with JW Wilson and not one of us suggested he was the UNSUB. We also missed the partner’s ID in that other case…Jared…Jared…,”

Rainey remembered. “Howard. Jared Howard.”

“Thank you, Rainey,” Paula said, not missing a beat. “The Jared Howard case. We interviewed Chelsea Thomas and she wasn’t a suspect.”

Curtis spoke up. His sweet demeanor hid an encyclopedic knowledge of human behavior. Rainey had learned early on that this young man was exceptionally bright, if charmingly naïve.