Redemption in Love (Hearts on the Line) (31 page)

“Probably not a great idea to let her do all that housework.”

“It’s not, and she knows it,” Gavin said. “I’m sure this is a ploy to get me to see her.”

“What do you mean?”

“Craig said Amandine wanted to talk face-to-face at the lawyer’s office, but I made it clear that wasn’t going to happen.”

Ethan frowned. “So you’re not going to go?”

“Of course I’m going to go. Can you stick around for an early dinner before you fly out?”

“Sure.”

“I’ll be back soon.” Gavin would man up and see the woman who’d done everything in her power to be free of him.

* * *

Thomas parked in front of the mansion, and Gavin stared out the windows. There had to be someone in the garden. Or how about the pool in the back?

“See anybody?” Gavin asked.

Thomas’s brow wrinkled in the rearview mirror. “No. The key card still works though.”

“It doesn’t matter.” He tapped a knuckle on his mouth. “Tell me something. Would you drive me around if I didn’t pay you?”

Thomas shrugged. “Probably not. My wife would kill me.”

“Exactly.” Gavin hopped out and jogged up a few steps to the main entrance. Maybe he should have a lift installed. Amandine was still slim, but it wouldn’t be easy to climb stairs once the baby in her belly grew bigger.

He opened the door. The foyer was unlit, but natural light from outside poured in through the giant windows. He stood in there, waiting for Luna—or someone—to come and say hello.

After a few minutes, it dawned on him that nobody was coming out to greet him. He rubbed the back of his neck.

He went to the living room, reading room, study and kitchen. The house was eerily quiet.

He’d hand-selected the staff after thorough background checks, including past employment history and criminal records. Amandine had known them for over three years and talked about them like they were family. Could she really have fired everyone? It seemed completely out of character.

She probably was under a lot of stress because of you
.

Hell. He couldn’t do it right even from a distance.

Finally he reached the master bedroom suite.

An old sheet lay crumpled and twisted on the king-size bed they used to share. Amandine must’ve napped in the afternoon; he remembered how tired she was these days.

Gavin sat in an armchair. He tapped a finger on the armrest and gazed at his reflection in the window. Luna would’ve never let a bed remain unmade for more than an hour, if that. She also laid out fresh sheets every morning. Clearly, she and the rest of the staff really were gone.

Where was Amandine?
Somebody needed to talk some sense into her. Since Brooke had no interest in the job, it was up to him.

He dialed her number and almost jumped when something rang from the nightstand.

Tightness formed in his chest, pressing against his lungs and heart. She should’ve taken her phone in case she needed emergency help. What if she started feeling nauseous? Or worse, fainted again?

He shook his head. If she’d fainted, she’d be helpless. Which was precisely why she should have somebody with her at all times!

This was all his fault. The agreement he’d created was ridiculous, and the settlement Craig had tried to convince him to pursue was equally off the mark.
The basic problem
, Gavin thought,
is that I should have never agreed to something I didn’t want
.
I should’ve spent the rest of my life convincing Amandine she should stay with me
.

He should’ve fought for the only woman he ever loved.

His fingers unsteady, he dialed Thomas’s number.

“Is there a problem, sir?” the chauffeur said.

“Can you check if Amandine’s Mercedes is in the garage?”

“Of course. Just a moment.” A few minutes later, he said, “Yes. I see it.”

“Okay. Thanks.”

So Amandine was somewhere in the house. There was no other car for her to use…and no one to drive her now, either.

He went to the studio. That was the only other place she might be. On the way, he composed the speech he wanted to deliver. Something stern—she
was
risking her safety—but also sweet and pleading and full of love and hope and—

His mind blanked as he saw a large canvas.

It was about half-finished, and the colors consisted of mostly warm flesh-toned shades with some chocolate brown mixed in. His eyes couldn’t make sense of it for an instant, and then he saw the broad pattern and his breath caught as realized it was him in repose. In the nude.

He studied the painting. The Gavin in the work was relaxed, his face peaceful, yet something about the lines of his body, the way his right arm was flung over his head looked powerful, strength leashed in sleep.

His throat closed. He’d never posed for his wife. This was how Amandine saw him, remembered him.

What an idiot he’d been all this time. Why had it taken so long for him to realize how lucky he was to love a woman who loved him back?

But it’s too late
,
isn’t it? You killed her love with your neglect
.

He stepped toward the chair where she would be. She’d gotten rid of her stool for a big armchair with good back support.

“Amandine.” He kept his voice soft to avoid startling her. He steeled himself for the inevitable pain of seeing his wife again.

She didn’t respond.

When he reached the chair, he saw her slumped sideways. Her face was a bloodless white, other than some dark brown paint smudged above her right cheek like a football player’s eye-black.

Panic clutched his heart, and he fought to draw in air as he searched for her pulse. It was there, erratic but weak. Her skin felt cool against his. Paint marred her shirt and shorts; she must’ve fainted while working.

Stay calm
.

He pulled out his phone. It shook in his hands. No… It was his hands that were shaking.

He managed to hit nine-one-one and waited.
Come on
,
come on
.

“Nine-one-one. What’s your emergency?”

“It’s my wife. She’s unconscious. Please help. She’s pregnant.”

The operator asked for the address, and he rattled it out.

“We’re sending an ambulance right now, sir.”

He hung up and called Thomas to direct the ambulance personnel inside. Thomas said something, but Gavin couldn’t comprehend anything through the pounding in his head. His eyes stung. He rubbed them, only to find his hands wet with tears. He almost laughed at the futility of them. How unproductive, how unhelpful. But he couldn’t stop crying or force the panic to subside.

He cradled Amandine, willing her to absorb his body heat. She was so cold!

After what seemed like an eternity, paramedics showed up. They took Amandine away on a stretcher. She looked so small and frail. Gavin hopped into the back of the ambulance to be with her. He wasn’t letting her out of his sight. He was never letting her go.

If he made her miserable…

He wasn’t a complete idiot. He could learn. He could change. He would make it his life’s study to figure out what made Amandine happy. He wasn’t letting her go.

“Is she going to be okay?” Gavin asked.

The paramedic looked at him with gentle compassion. “Let’s have a doctor take a look.”

At the hospital, people in gowns came out to take Amandine away. Gavin stood in the lobby, staring after them.
Please let her be all right
.
Please
.

“Gavin.”

There was a large but gentle hand on his shoulder. Ethan. “Hey. How did you know?” Gavin asked.

“Your chauffeur called Hilary,” Ethan said. “Let’s go to the waiting area.”

Ethan led Gavin to a nondescript room with light blue vinyl upholstery. There was a flat-screen TV mounted on the wall that showed some kind of financial news, something Gavin would’ve paid attention to in any other situation, but he looked away. All the things he’d found important before seemed shallow and meaningless now.

He took a seat and stared at nothing.

“Did the doctors say anything?” Ethan asked.

Gavin shook his head.

“You all right? You look like shit,” Ethan said.

“Feel worse.” Gavin rubbed his face. It was sticky with dried tears. “I don’t know how I could’ve screwed up so bad. I love her so much, but I never even told her. Now I might not get the chance. She looked awful, Ethan. All white and cold. For a minute I thought she was dead.”

Ethan put an arm around Gavin’s shoulder. “She’s not dead. She’s at one of the best hospitals in the city, and she will be okay.”

Gavin nodded. He was desperate to believe Ethan was right. That Amandine would pull through, and he would get another chance.

Finally a doctor came to the room. He had a head of black hair that shot up in the air like he’d been shocked and looked as though he’d been awake for two or three days straight. “Mr. Lloyd?” he said.

“Yes?” Gavin rose. His knees trembled.

“Your wife’s fine. It was—”

“The baby?”

“No problem either. It was hypoglycemia and a migraine. She shouldn’t eat chocolate or other sweets until after she delivers. We want to keep her for observation for twenty-four hours, but after that she should be able to go home.”

Gavin swayed, all the tension draining away. “Thank god.”

“If you want, you can see her now. She’s in Room 236.”

Gavin started for the room, leaving Ethan sprawled on one of the vinyl couches. “I’ll just wait here,” Ethan called after him.

* * *

Gavin pushed the door open and walked inside. The room was spacious, with a single bed. Amandine lay on it, her face still too pale. A needle was taped to the inside of her elbow, a clear solution dripping into the tube it was connected to.

“Amandine,” he said, his voice hoarse.

Her eyes opened, then widened. “Oh my god, Gavin. What happened to you?”

Her reaction cracked something inside him, and he burst out laughing. “Me? You’re the one who fainted.”

“But you look…” Her voice softened, and she raised a hand. “Were you crying?”

That hand was a lifeline, and he went forward and folded it into both of his. It was still too cool for his peace of mind. “Don’t ever scare me like that again.”

“Who found me?”

“I did. I went to the house.”
For you
. “Brooke said you’d fired everyone.”

“Oh.” She frowned. “I didn’t really fire them. Just gave everyone a two week-long paid vacation.”

“Why?”

“You wouldn’t talk to me.”

“I’m here now.”
Tell me you changed your mind
.
Tell me you want the whole package
—
me included
.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were closing your funds?” she asked.

That’s it?
His limbs seemed impossibly weak now, and it was all he could do to remain propped up against her bed. “I’m not really closing them. I’m cutting back.”

“Whatever you call it. Why didn’t you tell me?”

He sighed. “It never came up. You decided you wanted to divorce me, no matter what, the day I made the decision.”

“Why…?”

“I don’t need a twenty-first billion.”

Her upper teeth bit into her soft lower lip. What was she thinking? Did she feel like she’d made a mistake by asking for a divorce after all? He recalled the painting she’d been working on when she fainted. If she saw him like this even now, he might still have a chance. “Amandine—”

“Gavin—”

They both stopped short and stared at each other. Her eyes flickered with so many emotions, but at the end, she simply said, “I missed you.”

Then she sat up and hugged him. His arms went around her in hot relief and gratitude. She felt so good, so perfect. Had he really taken her for granted? Not come home early enough to hold her before going to bed? He’d been the biggest idiot ever. “Not as much as I missed you.”

“Mark said you bought a penthouse,” she said, her voice muffled against his chest.

“I thought that’s what you wanted. You told me you’d do whatever it took to be free of me.”

She sniffled. “I didn’t mean it. In the end I just couldn’t give you up.”

“I know that now, but when you told me you’d rather be divorced than have a family with me, I thought…” He swallowed. “It took me a long time to figure it out, but what I really wanted was to provide for you, make sure you had the world at your feet, and pamper you so you’d never have anything to worry about and know that you’re loved.”

Her eyes shone with something that looked suspiciously like tears. He kissed them and tasted salt and love.

He continued: “The money was supposed to be a means to an end, but I don’t need another billion to do that. My work was competing with my time with you, and I let it win. I gave you things, but I wasn’t there for you.”

Pulling back, she tilted her head so she could look at him better. “Then why did you agree to divorce?”

“Because of what Catherine and Mom said.”

“
What?
”

He told her then about what both women had said. “If it had been one or the other, I might not have given up so easily, but Catherine and Mom have very different motivations and points of view. When they both said similar things, I figured maybe they were right.” He took a stool and pulled her on his lap. “I’ve been a selfish bastard and didn’t make you happy. I knew instinctively that you needed
me
, but I couldn’t let myself believe it.”

“Why not?”

“It sounds like a bad excuse, but I never believed anybody could want me the way I am. I always needed to be more—more successful, more interesting, more everything.”

She ran a finger along his cheek, and he closed his eyes at the unbearable sweetness of her touch.

“Oh, Gavin,” she whispered.

He caught her eye and held it. “My experience tends to confirm it, but I let my past color my present to the point that I couldn’t relax around you and enjoy our marriage.”

“You aren’t the only one. I was always worried.”

His head jerked back. “What? Why?”

“I thought I could never measure up to Catherine. She’s just so perfect. She seemed like a more suitable wife for somebody like you.”