Rebel Rockstar (22 page)

My mouth lands on her neck and I suck on her skin, not caring whether she'll have a hickey in the morning. And fuck, does she taste good. So sweet. All mine.

"On my mouth," she manages to get out. "Kiss my mouth, River..."

I don't need to be told twice. I let her come closer, my hands on the small of her back. Faith looks at me expectantly, and I hold her gaze. She looks so vulnerable right now, but so ready. I wish I could bottle this moment up and look at it for years to come.

"Say please," I order her.

"Please." She’s shaking in my arms. "Kiss me, River. Please, I need-"

And then my mouth is on her.

I don't know what ideas she had about her first kiss. Probably something sweet, innocent and PG13.

I don't do PG13, though. I do fucking R-rated.

I claim her mouth, make her whimper against my lips. I don't let her move an inch, because in this moment, she's only mine and I taste the dessert I've been anticipating for years.

"Oh god," she mumbles against my mouth, breathing heavily. "God, River..."

I shut her up by deepening our kiss, tasting her mouth. "So sweet," I growl against her lips. "You're so sweet..."

"RIVER!"

The shout comes out of nowhere.

W
e spring apart right away
. My heart is beating so fast I'm dizzy, and I struggle to stay on two feet. I throw a panicked look into River's direction, but there's a smile on my face. And it looks like he's grinning, too.

He grabs my arm and pulls me after him, running for the door. I'm laughing now, laughing like I haven't done in at least a year. Someone's shouting, coming after us, but we're too fast. We're running down the street until we reach River's bike, put on our helmets and rush out of there.

My hair whips back in the wind, my hands shake as I hold on to River's waist. God, that was intense. That kiss... That kiss was nothing a first kiss should be, and everything I'd always been dreaming of.

I nuzzle against River's shoulders, unable to help myself. We can't really talk since he’s driving, but I feel so close to him right now. Closer than I've felt since the day he held me as I cried when my mother died.

He pulls up in a busy street and we get off the bike. All it takes is one look and we're convulsing in giggles once again. "That," I say, feeling short of breath. "Was absolutely crazy."

Instead of replying, River grabs me by the hips and pulls me in. He kisses me again, and one more time, I let myself get lost in his lips, his hands, and his broad chest.

This time, the kiss is sweeter, gentler. He's caressing my mouth with his lips. The kiss is a promise - to take care of me, to love me, to be there for me. All of that in a simple kiss... I must be losing my mind.

I pull away, feeling myself blushing. Everyday Faith would question this. Everyday Faith would ask questions, panic and beg for an explanation. But I'm not everyday Faith today. Today, I'm going to do what I've always wanted.

"Where are we?" I ask, looking around us.

River puts our helmets away in the storage compartment under the seat of his bike. "I have no idea. I just pulled up here, figured we'd lose coach easier if we blended in."

"That was your coach?" I furrow my brows. "But won't you get in trouble for being at the gym?"

River grins at me. God, he makes my insides melt. That can't be good, can it?

"I'll deal with that tomorrow," he winks at me. "Today, I'm all yours, Faith."

I blush again, but he doesn't let me wallow in my embarrassment. Instead, River grabs my hand and pulls me towards the crowded entrance to the building.

There's a huge line outside and people queuing to get in. Loud music is blaring from the inside and we exchange excited looks.

"Looks like it's a concert," River says. "What do you say, Faith? Want to crash this party?"

"We're not twenty-one," I hiss at him quietly, looking around to make sure no one heard me. The bouncer is already giving us a sideways glance, and I really don't want to get in trouble on top of everything else.

"We'll find a back exit," River murmurs, then winks at me. "We're pretty good at that, aren't we?"

I laugh and shake my head, but he's already pulling me away from the crowd. We end up in a side alley in a few moments, which is completely deserted. And before I know exactly what’s going on, River has pushed me against a brick wall. He's looking deep into my eyes, his hands resting calmly on my hips.

His eyes are so dark that I can barely make out the pupils. He looks like a predator right now, like he's about to bite into my skin and taste my flesh. And I think I wouldn't mind that, not one little bit...

"You're so beautiful," he says softly against my neck. His nose hits my skin, and I realize he's smelling it. It feels weird, but it turns me on so much. I've never felt this way before, and when I feel my panties getting wet, I panic. I try to push him off, but River grabs my hands by the wrists and pins them above my head. A small gasp escapes my lips.

"River..." I manage to get out weakly. I give him a desperate look and he smiles at me, baring his teeth. "Please."

"Please what, baby?" he coos.

"Please..." My eyes are darting across his face. Even I don't know what I'm asking him for. "Please kiss me again."

His lips trace a pattern along my collarbone and I gasp, louder this time around. "And what else?" he taunts me.

I'm wriggling under his touch, unsure whether I want to break free or get closer to him. "God, River," I moan. He's pushing me. I don't recognize my own voice anymore, the words leaving my lips as alien as my throaty tone. "Please, touch me. Touch me everywhere."

He lets go of my wrists and gives me a warning. "Keep your hands up. Don't you dare fucking move them."

I nod, feeling dizzier than ever.

He grabs the small of my back with one hand and presses me against the wall gently. His other hand lingers at my throat, gently stroking my skin. "Arch," he orders me, and I give him a lusty look. "Arch your back, baby."

I don't mean to, but my body is acting of its own accord. My back arches, pushing my body into his hands. His hand roams down, across my décolletage and finally down the middle of my breasts. He's not touching them, but god, it feels good. He stops when he reaches the waist of my skirt. I'm fully clothed, yet I've never felt more naked in my entire life.

River looks into my eyes for permission. I don't know what he wants to do with my approval, but I'm already nodding. And then his hand reaches my thigh and I'm burning, burning, burning.

"Fuck," I mewl.

"Nice skirt," he smirks at me.

I'm wearing a pleated skirt that I might've outgrown last summer. I thought it looked fine at home, but now it feels scandalously short.

"I remember when it was knee-length," River murmurs into my ear, sending shivers down my spine. Then his hand is on the inside of my thigh, and he's slapping my legs apart. "Can you spread your legs for me, baby?"

I moan his name, my eyes glazing over as I obey. Oh my god, this can't be happening. He's going to touch me in places even I haven't explored, right here on the street. And if he doesn't touch me soon, I'm going to beg him to do it. I don’t know how far I can go, or if I’ll even be able to voice my inhibitions to him.

I moan again. His hand reaches up higher on my thigh, his other hand joining it. I open my legs for him, needing his touch, wanting him, not knowing what he’s going to do. Am I going to lose my virginity in an alley like this?

“More, baby. Open more,” River’s lips brush against my earlobe as he bites down. I hurry to obey. It’s not enough for him. His hands slide up the inside of my thighs to my hips, pulling my skirt up over my waist. My panties are completely exposed, and I blush furiously, wondering if he can see the wet spot. His eyes aren’t on mine anymore…

He probably can. Oh god. His hands slide back down to my thighs, pushing them as far apart as they can go. I close my eyes in embarrassment. I was so mean to River earlier, and now we are here, doing what I’d thought about before, and I couldn’t open up like he’d asked me to…

He brushes a hand into my hair, and I open my eyes to see him staring at me with fire in his eyes. His hand runs down my cheek, pushing my hair behind my ear before continuing down my neck.

“River,” I gasp.

“Shh,” he quiets me, lightly squeezing my neck. I shut up immediately. His hand slips from my neck down my chest, tracing my stomach, as he gets closer to my burning core.

A crashing sound pulls us apart. My hands go to his chest immediately, feeling the hard muscles there. I bite my lip, wanting to feel my hands against him a different way. I need to push him away. Someone’s coming. But River doesn’t move an inch.

It’s like the risk of someone coming and seeing us only excites him more, and as he pulls me to his chest, I feel something hard against my thigh, something I’ve never felt before.

He doesn’t try anything, to my dismay. I bury my head in the crook of his shoulder, breathing heavily.

Wanting to talk.

Not knowing what to say.

We wait.

Can he feel me trembling in his arms?

“No one here,” he says, kissing the top of my head again. Our eyes turn to look for the source of the sound. The light is dim back here. I can only see the smoldering look in his eyes against the black drop of the alley, and that’s just because a streetlight lets me see him.

His hand is on my cheek again. “Looks like a shipment crate fell,” he grins wickedly. I look around. Whatever band is in there must be storing some extra equipment out in the alley. The crates explain enough. He pulls my face to his and gives me a short kiss before pulling away. My mouth is tingling.

“Let’s crash this place.” River winks at me.

There’s a dark door almost disguised by the color of the wall surrounding it. Eventually, we find it with River leading the way. He always leads the way, ever since we were children. I would get hurt following him around, but to be honest, I could follow him forever.

He turns to me with a smirk, his hand on the knob as our eyes lock. My legs go weak again, shaking from remembering his touch on me and from imagining his fingers on me again. His eyes are full of lust and mischief.

“We’re not actually breaking in here, right?” It sounds lame the minute I say it. I can’t help it. I wanted – want – to do this, but now that we’re actually going through with it, it seems so… Bad. So deliciously
River
.

He raises an eyebrow at me and pulls his hand away from the knob, pretending to care about what he’s doing. I cock my head at him questioningly, knowing he’s only trying to humor me. He cocks his head back, and it’s so…

“Enjoying the view, Faith?” He breaks out into a grin again, and then nods at the door. “Now, are you doing the honors, or am I?”

I mumble a response, trying not to stutter. River merely laughs at me and gets to work on the door lock. I watch him nervously, stepping from one foot to the other with my heart pounding louder than ever. I’m sure someone could find us just by following my rapid heartbeat.

Moments later, we are in. I don’t know how River knows how to pick locks. I don’t know why I’m surprised, but I guess when I see River, there’s two people standing in one place. The devilish young man before me, and the scruffy little boy scraping his knees while we ride our bikes together.

He’s upgraded to motorcycles, I remind myself.

“What was that?”

Oh my god. Did I say that out loud?

“Nothing,” I say innocently. We’re so close now, but compared to that moment outside… There’s so much tension, so many unanswered questions. I move closer to him, unable to keep eye contact. He’ll just smirk at me again… And I want to get lost in his touch one more time.

River grabs me by the arm and marches me inside. I feel like a petulant kid being punished, but at the same time, it’s giving me tingles all over, just being this close to him, and having our skin touch.

In the club, some kind of rock band is playing, mixed with club music. Nothing I listen to, but, looking at River, it seems like he’s in his element. I huddle closer to myself but he pulls me back to him again. His hand goes to the small of my back.

He’ll keep me safe.

I know he will.

I don’t know why I behaved like such a bitch today. Looking back, I remember all the horrible things I’ve done – forgetting his birthday was merely the cherry on top. I ditched him for Jason, yelled at him when he tried to defend me and then stormed off, making him come after me.

I guess it’s my insecurity talking. Ever since River became River 2.0, I’ve been so desperately afraid he would realize I’m not good enough for him. I’m scared one day I’ll wake up and he won’t be trying to be my friend anymore. He’ll just give up.

I guess I wanted to push him away myself, before he had the chance to hurt me.

“Something on your mind?” River turns to me. We’re still walking deeper into… Whatever this place is. I think it doubles as a club and a music venue. Some places do that, I think. I wouldn’t know – I don’t even have a fake ID yet.

But even as we move, he’s only focused on me. And on making sure no bouncer sees us. River might be able to pass for older, but I… I am definitely an eighteen-year-old girl.

“I’ve been a bitch,” I whimper. “I’m worried… about us.” I hope he doesn’t think that sounds as pathetic, even though the whiny tone of my voice lets me know it does. We aren’t even anything yet, even though he touched me in that way. But at the same time, this is River. I’ve been half in love with him for years, and I don’t think I’ll be able to go back to just being friends.

I don’t even notice it when we come to a halt. His hand is rough on my arm, but not in a way that hurts me. River would never hurt me. I trust him.

“Don’t be,” his voice is softer than I’ve ever heard it. “You and me, Faith… We’re forever. We’ve both always known that.” He tucks a stray strand of hair behind my ear.

Then his arm drops from mine and he’s back to his old self. He nods to our far left, and I notice a stand full of food and… Liquor? “I’m getting us drinks. Do you want something?”

I’ve never drunk.

“A Coke?” I offer lamely, and River grins at me.

“I wasn’t gonna get you drunk, Faith,” he says in a calming tone. “A Coke it is.” He winks at me and heads for the bar.

I’m alone. I watch his retreating back, wishing his arms were around me instead of swinging at his sides as he goes on a quest for liquids. I’ve never noticed his saunter before. He walks with such swagger, it almost makes me giggle out loud.

A light touch on my arm, the other one, the one not still burning from where River touched me, catches my attention. I look up to a tall man smiling down at me. I think he might’ve said hey or something, but it’s so loud and my thoughts are elsewhere.

“Excuse me?” I manage to shout over the music. He’s grinning at me like the cat that just caught the mouse.

I don’t know what he said. A closer look reveals he’s not bad looking. But he’s not River. I nod at him, hoping he’ll go away while my River – not my River; I correct myself – gets back.

He doesn’t.

Instead, he takes me into his arms and carries me on stage.

The singer! My ears rumble with the sound of the band behind me.

The front row is full of smiling teeth that remind me of sharks and eyes full of malice, and suddenly I’m scared. I’m back on my feet, my arm raised in the air. Entwined with this guy’s.