Psyche Shield (16 page)

Jason surprised me with his reply. “No. The Mage is Pack. If
you won’t listen to reason, then we’re done here. Get out of my territory and
don’t come back. I may not give you a second chance.”

Graham glared at the Boise Wolves upon hearing he could
leave. He didn’t believe it and expected some kind of trick. He had few choices
left and only one possible way out, so he took it. Without another word, the
Montana Wolves turned on their heels and walked away. Jason watched them go,
following their progress until they turned a corner and disappeared from sight.

Billie turned to Amy, laying a hand on her friend’s arm.
“Are you okay?”

The Medic still trembled but less than before. “Yeah. Holy
moly, that was close!”

“Let’s get you back to my place,” Billie stated.
Will you
make sure they leave town, love?

Gladly. Did Jason really just declare me Pack?
I
asked.

He did
, Billie confirmed.
But don’t think you’re
off the hook for disobeying orders.

I couldn’t let them hurt Amy
, I defended myself.

She hesitated before responding, and I felt her disapproval.
I’m glad she’s safe. We’ll be home soon.

Coming back to full awareness of the living room, two sets
of acute Wolf senses faded rapidly. Smells and sounds from the other side of
town dulled into nothingness, and I looked out of a single set of eyes once
again. The abrupt change made the room spin slightly, and I steadied myself.
Magepower dissipated back into the world around me, its energy retreating from
my body. The void spared me. My hands shook in the aftermath, and my breath
came heavy from my chest.

“It’s so easy to use, but on the best day letting it go
feels like I’ve run a mile,” I commented self-consciously.

Sierra stared at me, wide brown eyes completely fixated, her
muscles tense as if I’d jump at her. “That was enlightening.”

“Is that the first time you’ve sensed magepower?” I asked,
dropping into the couch heavily. She feared me again, and my stomach knotted at
the sensation.

“Yes. It’s kind of unpleasant,” she admitted.

“That seems to be a universal opinion,” I acknowledged and
rubbed my eyes.

Sierra prepared herself for the worst. “Is everyone okay?”

“Everyone is fine. No one’s even injured. Jason eighty-sixed
your packmates and mine are on their way here.” She closed her eyes in silent
gratitude. I shared her sentiment and dropped my head into my hands. I’d used
magepower yet again. “I’ve never smelled like anything other than Mage to you,
have I?” I asked Sierra remorsefully without looking up.

“No. What else would you smell like?” she asked.

“I only smell like a Mage if I’ve used magepower recently.
It fades. Normally I smell like a Sensitive. I’ve been using it too much
lately. I need a vacation.”

Kathryn patted my leg comfortingly, but her voice held a
slight edge that I couldn’t identify. “We are fortunate you are on our side,
dearling. You would be a formidable foe.”

I smiled sideways at her, the statement more true than she
could guess even knowing Isingoma’s vision about me. “Jason called me Pack.”

Kathryn’s eyebrows made a valiant attempt at tapping the
ceiling. “Did he now?”

“Graham said he’d end the conflict if Jason killed me. Jason
said no, the Mage is Pack.”

“I’m very pleased to hear that. You have the status you
deserve.” She’d argued my case many times. By tradition, a Wolf’s mate became
Pack automatically, a custom denied to me because of my heritage.

We didn’t have long to wait before the party returned home.
We didn’t think to call Nathan, but he and Phil arrived just before the others.
Jason entered first, his head low as he glared at me. The door barely closed
behind everyone before my Alpha began roaring. “I told you to stay out of Wolf
minds!” I looked at Billie, who stood beside and a step behind Jason in what
I’d come to view as the Beta’s spot. His reaction didn’t surprise her, and her
expression remained neutral. The others snuck past us silently and retreated to
a less volatile side of the room.

Jason’s explosion astounded me after all my efforts to keep
Amy alive and the Pack War at bay. I grew instantly defensive. “Amy would be
dead if I hadn’t done something.” Fisting my hands on my hips, I argued right
back. “I didn’t hurt her. I just talked to her.”

“That’s not the point, and you know it. You disobeyed my
orders. If you were Wolf, I’d knock you across the room.” He waved his fist as
if he wanted to but stayed far enough away to resist temptation. I wasn’t sure
if his restraint towards me would hold, and stupidly I didn’t care.

What else was I supposed to do?
I asked Billie.

He sensed the mental contact and shook his fist at me. “No!
This is between you and me. Save your mindspeech crap for later.”

“What else was I supposed to do?” I repeated the question,
offended that I couldn’t speak to my mate about it. The other Wolves watched us
in shock. No one talked back to Jason, and this went beyond our normal
bickering. I challenged the Alpha who’d just named me Pack. He would have
grabbed any of the spectators by the throat for speaking to him the way I did.
It shocked me too. No one brought out my belligerent side as explosively as
Jason.

“You were supposed to follow orders,” he snarled menacingly.
“I’m a controlling son of a bitch for a reason.”

Sarcasm ripped through me, and I spoke without thinking. “So
you’ve been honing this skill? No wonder you’re so good at it.”

He glared at me, a low growl rumbling through the room, and I
met his gaze squarely. I wasn’t Wolf, and my instincts didn’t tell me to back
down. His lip curled, and the muscles on his neck popped. “I’m very good at
keeping my Pack safe. An out-of-control packmate is dangerous to everyone.
You’ve been around long enough to know that. Follow my orders.” He repeated
himself, something he didn’t like to do.

I intended to and smiled cheekily. “You already regret
calling me Pack, don’t you?” He grunted. “Amy’s alive, so I’m not sorry. But I
won’t do it again,” I conceded.

“Make sure you don’t,” he retorted, accepting that I’d
backed down in my own way. “Did they leave town?”

I nodded. “Immediately. They’re out of range, but I don’t
think they’re gone entirely.”

“What do you mean?”

I furrowed my eyebrows, trying unsuccessfully to clarify the
impression. “It’s just a feeling. I’d have to get rude to know for sure.”

“Don’t.” A thought occurred to him and his eyes narrowed.
“Did you trespass on their minds today too?”

“No,” I assured him honestly. “Only Amy’s.” Nathan hadn’t heard
what happened yet. I couldn’t see him where he stood behind me, but I sensed
his horror.

“You did something right at least. Stay out of their minds,
no matter what. That’s a mess I won’t be able to clean up short of killing
you.” His lip curled so high I could see his teeth.

I cocked my head at him and sighed loudly. “I’m Pack, and
you’re still threatening to kill me. Are you ever going to stop?”

“I doubt it. You are the most annoying, disrespectful pain
in the ass I’ve ever met. You don’t shut up, and you’ve been at the center of
every mess since you arrived. Since you don’t have Wolf strength and take too
long to heal, I’m reluctant to hit you. But don’t push me.” He turned abruptly
to Billie, dismissing me entirely. The argument ended on a very dissatisfying
note in my opinion.

I glared silently as he addressed Amy. “Why didn’t you
answer your phone? Why were you out there at all?”

“I was getting supplies. I stayed in public like you told
us,” she replied softly. “With all the injuries lately, my jump bag was getting
light. But then my purse disappeared, and I couldn’t even buy what I went out
for. My phone was in my purse.”

“Graham,” Kathryn interjected unexpectedly and looked to
Sierra for verification.

She nodded. “That’s his style.”

“What are you saying?” Jason seemed to have worked it out
for himself, but waited for their verification.

Sierra answered. “He brought a Human packmate to scout ahead
for him. That’s how he knew where to find Amy and how he cut her off from
communicating with us. It must be Linda. She’s cleaned up her act for the most
part, but she’s a talented thief. I don’t know anyone else who could steal a
purse out from under a Wolf’s nose.”

“He deliberately targeted our Medic,” Billie’s fury began to
rise. “That’s low.”

“That’s smart,” Jason corrected her, his eyes narrow in
thought.

“This Linda character is probably still here. We have to
find her,” Billie declared and asked me. “Do you know where she is?”

“No. I can’t tell one Human from another unless I know them.
The only way it’s possible is to piggyback through Sierra, and that’s not going
to happen,” I reminded her. Sierra’s expression affirmed she would never give
me permission into her mind.

“Glenn can find her,” Jason declared. The Alpha gave new
orders for the pack’s safety. “Tell everyone to stay in threes, even in public.
Billie and Matthew’s team are the only exceptions. You stay in pairs. Graham’s
fox enough to hunt in public without Humans noticing. We underestimated him and
almost lost Amy because of it. No one goes anywhere alone, not even you.” He
pointed at Billie.

Jason slammed the door behind him as he left, alone I
noticed. His sudden departure after the eruption left a vacuum. When angry,
Jason filled a room and the sudden void left some of us dazed. Only Billie seemed
unaffected. She crossed the room and took my hands in hers. “I’m glad Amy’s
alive. But Jason’s right.”

Half the time I couldn’t stop myself from arguing with
Jason, but with Billie I backed down immediately. “God, I know he’s right that
following orders keeps everyone safe. But she was walking right into their
hands. I don’t know how to stand by and do nothing if someone I care about is
in trouble.”

Kathryn answered for Billie. “You remember that you are
Pack, and Pack works together.”

Billie nodded and held my gaze, her green eyes showing the
seriousness of her statement. “Trust me and trust Jason. We’re both very good
at keeping our pack safe. You could have asked. You made a solitary decision,
and that’s not our way.”

“I’m sorry.” I kissed Billie’s hands and gave her the
apology I should have given my Alpha.

I turned to Amy and smiled merrily. “I’m glad you’re safe.”

She smiled weakly, but it didn’t reach her eyes. I could
barely hear her she spoke so softly. “You saved my life, and I’m glad I’m alive.
But I gotta admit, I didn’t like it, and I don’t want to do it again. There’s
something not right about having someone in my head. I don’t know how you do
it, Billie.” Nathan held her closer as if his arms could protect her from
anything. He studied the floor.

Billie replied. “Sadie’s voice in my mind feels more than
right. It feels like she belongs there. It would probably be different with
anyone else.”

Nathan raised his gaze to meet mine, and I saw
disappointment in it. Haunted memories shadowed his eyes. He’d been through
more than anyone else at the hands of a Mage. He’d lived in hell, with
Cassandra’s incessant voice in his mind for months. He loved Amy, and I’d
entered her mind without permission.

“Nathan ... it wasn’t like what she did to you,” I tried to
explain.

His head bobbed thoughtfully. “I know ya’ Sadie, and I know
ya do what ya think is right and ya just wanna protect us. But people do lousy
things all the time and make themselves feel good by saying it’s for the right
reason. Ya said yerself the magepower makes ya feel like a god, and God’s a big
reason why people do the wrong thing for the right reason.” He sighed. “I’m not
tryin’ to make ya feel bad. I’m just tryin’ to make ya think. I know ya’d never
hurt my mate on purpose.”

The word ’mate’ jumped out and bit us unexpectedly, changing
the mood of the room instantly. I looked at the couple happily while Billie
whistled beside me. Amy nestled her head comfortably in Nathan’s neck. “It took
long enough, but I found my mate.” She brightened at the new topic and pulled
the collar of her shirt down to show a brilliantly bruised matebite above one
breast.

“Congratulations, my dear,” Kathryn beamed. “This calls for
wine and a toast.” She left to raid Billie’s wine cupboard, and I headed for
the wine glasses. I wanted to disappear entirely.

Amy and Nathan followed me into the kitchen, recognizing a
retreat when they saw it. I spoke without turning. “I’m sorry, Amy. I didn’t
mean to hurt you.”

“Apology accepted. I’m not mad at you, Sadie. Neither of us
are mad at you,” she assured me.

“Let’s put it behind us,” Nathan added.

I didn’t know what to say. Nathan had given me a lot to
think about, and I wanted to discuss it with Kato. “I don’t think I can put it
behind me yet. It didn’t even occur to me that I could be hurting you,” I
admitted, turning slowly to face them.

“Nuh uh, Sadie.” Nathan shook his head. “No more guilt. You
do that too much already.”

“Guilt keeps me from hurting people,” I admitted darkly. I’d
explained to them how the magepower made me feel. I didn’t want to tell them
that it never completely wore off. Every time I drew on the power it felt like
a little remained in me, calling me to use it again. I remembered how that had
escalated as a teenager until one day I got lost in the void. Guilt sent me
spiraling into the void then just as it did more recently. But it kept me from
using magepower casually, too. It would save me from spiraling out of control
just as it had my entire adult life.

Filling Nathan’s hands with wine glasses, I deliberately
changed the subject. “Congratulations. I’m happy for both of you.” They looked
at me with blatant concern but accepted that I didn’t want to discuss it.