Project Aquarius (The Sensitives Series Book 1) (26 page)

As if reading Drea’s mind, Peace Frog said, “Whether or not you are aware of it, you have a gift. Not being aware doesn’t negate its presence or make it go away. Some people who are aware choose not to use their gifts. That’s okay, too. But you can’t just sit around hating yourself. That’s a waste of your energy. You were made this way for a reason.”

How did she know?

Drea locked eyes with the dread-locked woman. Peace Frog came into sharp focus as everyone else faded into the background.

Drea admitted quietly, “I can’t help it. It’s just how I am. I don’t like myself. I doubt myself all the time. I’m depressed.”

She had never said it out loud before. The admission released a tidal wave of negative thoughts that choked her. She wasn’t good enough. She’d never get into Harvard. She was fat and ugly and would never have a boyfriend. She was alone in the world.

An explosion of tears ran down her face. Depression was her deep secret, something that made her damaged and unlovable. Now her secret was out, polluting the room, poisoning her new friends–– Drea wanted to rewind time, gather up her words and stuff them back in. She started to panic.

Peace Frog leaned toward her. The gesture made Drea feel like everyone could see right through her skin. She was exposed and her ugliness was showing. Drea’s whole body began to tremble. Gently, the oddball woman grabbed Drea’s hand and looked in her eyes.

“Look at me carefully. Just above the top of my head. Can you see it?”

Drea’s mind continued to race. Peace Frog hadn’t said anything about the depression. She had changed the subject. It was a small miracle.

“Look,” Peace Frog repeated gently. “Can you see the light above my head?”

Now that Drea looked carefully, the girl in the dreads was glowing ever so slightly. Her head basked in a violet glow. “What is that? Is that an LED?”

“No, I’m an Indigo.”

Indigo. There was that word again. Laura had mentioned something about it.

“It means I was born in a special spiritual time. I came to Earth to change humanity’s priorities to help people evolve. My healing energy makes me glow a purple color, indigo.”

“So you’re all Indigo people here?” Drea asked.

“No. Beverly is another type of healer. She uses an ancient Japanese technique called Reiki.”

The indigo light radiating from Peace Frog’s hair was brighter now. The glow had the quality of a diffuse sunset, clear and real.

“I told you that you could see auras,” said Peace Frog.

Amazing.

The soft encouragement made Drea feel warm and accepted. It was true, the indigo light was as real as the brick wall behind the wood stove. Drea could see auras. Taylor had said that the group’s abilities were getting stronger since the Event. Seeing Peace Frog’s beautiful purple halo made Drea know it was true.

“So… you’re an Indigo, but what am I?” Drea asked.

She needed a word. A term. Something for her brain to grab onto.

“How you choose to express your gift is up to you. But it’s clear to me that you are a psychic empath.”

Drea let it sink in. “I really am a psychic? I’ve been told that before but…”

She thought of the comments on her blog and her late night conversations with Sierra. It had come up many times, but she hadn’t wanted to believe it. She wasn’t ready then.

“But… I don’t know how to be psychic. I don’t know how to do anything.”

“Sure you do. You have prophetic dreams. You see auras. You use the tarot. Your sensitivity is your gift. You’re already psychic. And you’re naturally empathic–– your emotions run deep. You don’t have to do anything differently,” Peace Frog assured her.

“I… uh…” There were big implications. Drea felt empowered and alone all at the same time. Her head was spinning and she felt dizzy and hot. Her body shook violently. The world went out of focus and Drea felt her head nod.

***

Everything was white. A three-dimensional white.

    It was all encompassing. But not blinding.

    “You’re here,” said a familiar voice. “This is where you’re supposed to be Andrea.”

    “Mom?”

    Drea couldn’t see her mother, but she could sense her.

    “You’re on the right path. Trust it. I’ll see you soon,” Joanna’s voice said distantly.

    “Are you one of my guides?”

    A soft laugh. “No dear. I’m your mother.”

    Drea felt a soft squeeze on her shoulder.

***

When she opened her eyes, she was back on the couch and the spinning had completely subsided. She felt warm and strangely energized sitting next to the wood-burning stove. The Chow House smelled of hot creosote and earthy vegetables, like something straight out of history.

    Beverly Heartsong sat in the Shaker rocker knitting her scarf. It was a few inches longer now. Izzy was shucking vegetables in the kitchen and Peace Frog was doing dishes nearby. Sammy knelt on a stool at the counter. He was mashing up herbs with a mortar and pestle. Seeing all of them made Drea smile. She had woken up in a new mood in the new world.

Drea called out from the couch, “So, Peace Frog, what’s your real name anyway?” If she was going to live here and fit in with these people, she should learn more about them.

“Peace Frog is my real name.” The hippie woman winked.

“Your parents named you Peace Frog at birth?”

“Oh no, not at all. But it’s my
real
name. My spiritual name. You want to know my legal name? I let that identity die when my parents threw me out.”

“Your parents threw you out? How old were you?”

“I was 19. They didn’t respect my lifestyle. Said I was a dreamer and hung out with too many artist types who wouldn’t amount to anything. They called me a loser… Anyway… that part of me is over and done with. I’ve been living with my chosen family for a decade now. And they appreciate me for me.”

Peace Frog had overcome adversity and made her life into what she wanted. Drea had never met anyone so courageous and free.

“You just moved out and hit the reset button?” said Drea. “That’s pretty cool actually.”

“Sounds like someone recently hit the reset button for everybody else. You’re free too, Drea. You can be whoever you want to be now. You can let the negative thoughts go. You don’t have to hide anymore.”

For years, Drea had hidden behind ripped band T-shirts and intense makeup. Her former self was naive with pink streaks in her hair and thick layers of eyeliner. Drea had used her image as a freaky weirdo as a shield. It was suddenly so painfully obvious that the freedom Drea had always craved was internal. Somehow physical expression didn’t seem so important in the new world. No amount of pink hair dye would make her feel better. The solution was to accept herself, all parts of herself. And the new world gave her a fresh opportunity.

Drea felt another rush in her head as the epiphany alchemized. If she really was psychic, then she had better use it. She had learned too recently that life could be cut very short. Drea was ready to see the things that she was blind to before. She wanted to learn about being gifted. She wanted to live out in the open.

“I have to admit the Collective has a sweet set up. What you guys do here is really impressive,” Drea complimented. Sharing her positive thought made her feel lighter inside. “Thank you for letting me be a part of it.”

“Oh, no problem. Earthbound welcomes all people. We’ve been self-sufficient for over two decades, all our food and heat and everything. It’s a pretty special place. Everyone has a purpose here. Glad you can be a part of it,” Peace Frog said.

“Thanks. I think Earthbound is helping me discover that I have a purpose too…” Drea said. “But why… why did it have to happen like this? With all the death and destruction?”

“You may find more peace when you stop trying to figure out the whys and hows of what happened. Be in the moment now. The fact is that you survived for some reason and here we are. Besides dinner will be ready soon.”

The smell of hot fresh food hugged Drea’s nose. She was warm and safe and at home in this rustic cabin in the woods. Earthbound was a magical place. Taylor had been right all along.

***

Sleep was scarce that night, but for a different reason. Drea’s brain wouldn’t shut off. There was so much to think about. Her thoughts raced as she found every lump and spring in the couch. And the wood stove burned an unfamiliar smell into the air that made her uneasy.

    Just after 4 a.m., Darnell woke screaming. His mouth formed a giant O that pumped out foghorn strength sound. Drea rushed to his side and tried to embrace him. But he fought her off with full force kicks and punches.

“Darnell, what’s wrong?” she pleaded, as she took a fist to the face.

His eyes were glazed over like he was hypnotized. His screams continued as he clawed at her, drawing blood from her arms.

“Darnell, you’re okay. Relax. I’ve got you,” she soothed.

For once, she believed her own words. Drea felt centered and powerful. She could help him.

The little boy made grunting noises and twisted his body into terrible positions. It seemed no amount of comforting words could stop his night terror. But, Drea held firm. She believed she could help him. She covered him in love–– a protective bubble like Peace Frog had said. She held him firm, so he couldn’t hurt himself.

Then just as suddenly as the fit began, Darnell’s eyes snapped back to normal.

“What you lookin’ at?” were his first words. He was breathless, his T-shirt soaked through with sweat.

“It’s okay. We’re safe here.” Drea could finally say that for real. She was safe. Earthbound was a safe place.

“Where we at?” He was disoriented and his voice was tinged with panic.

“Earthbound, remember?”

At the mention of the commune, Darnell’s eyes stretched wide. “No. No! It ain’t safe here! We gotta go!”

He moved his limbs wildly, clawing at Drea once again, trying to gain his balance.

“It’s okay, we’re okay,” she repeated.

“No. No we ain’t. They comin’. They got guns. We gotta run.”

“You had a bad dream, Darnell. We’re okay.”

“We in danger Drea! It’s bad. They comin’. And they got guns!”

“Shhh, it’s okay.”

Drea pulled him close as her mom had done with her a thousand times. He thrashed for a few seconds and then gave in, collapsing on her chest, sobbing. He continued to mutter that they were in danger and he didn’t like Earthbound anymore. She squeezed him even tighter.

She held him until the sun came up that morning, petting his head and whispering, “It’s okay.” Even in the new world, little boys still needed mothering. She still craved mothering.

As the first fingers of light filtered through the back windows of the Chow House, a familiar figure glided by the window. The woman didn’t seem threatening, rather confident, like she belonged. She was faint at first, like a distant figure blocking out the sun. As the light richened to a deep yellow, the female came into focus. Sierra was unmistakable with her braids and her faded band T-shirt. Her outline glowed and her feet floated slightly above the ground. For once, Drea wasn’t freaked out. It was nice to see her best friend again. Sierra made eye contact with Drea, then tugged on her ear as if to say ‘Listen’. Then she faded into the sun as it came over the horizon.

Immediately, Drea knew Sierra’s appearance must have happened for a reason. A clear sign. The thought gave her a new wave of courage. Taylor and Peace Frog were right, she was powerful and gifted and there were signs everywhere!

Actually, when Drea really thought about it, everyone in the group had a different sensitivity, which had helped the group survive against all odds. Why didn’t she see it before? Their survival was not random. Their gifts had been integral to their journey. Taylor insisted that their gifts were growing stronger the more they used them, like building muscles. Darnell could scan buildings and sense life; Sammy could make food and medicine from the plants he had studied his whole life; Taylor could receive messages from angels and the deceased; and Drea had prophetic dreams and could use the tarot.

“The tarot!” she said out loud.

She slid Darnell’s limp body gently onto the couch cushions and ran across the room to her pack, which was perched on a kitchen stool. In the chaos of losing the wagon, somehow she had managed to hang onto it.

She reached inside and grabbed the velvet bag. Quickly, she pulled the drawstring open and dumped the cards onto the floor face up, revealing symbols from multiple esoteric mythologies including the zodiac. Drea sorted through them, pushing one card aside then another and another. She was looking for a particular image. Drea had just made a connection that she couldn’t afford to let go.

She found it.

“Right there. The symbol on the vans and the helicopters. The two squiggly parallel lines. It’s the zodiac symbol for Aquarius!” she said into the silence of the dawn.