Pretense (66 page)

"Cream or sugar?"

"Both," Mackenzie heard herself say, even as Sabrina was introducing her to her older brother, Josh.

"Hi." He smiled and went back to his breakfast. Mackenzie had eaten hours ago and was uncomfortable that she had intruded. Roz, on the other hand, thought nothing of it. She delivered Mackenzie's coffee, made just the way she liked, invited her to take a seat at the table, and settled down to talk to Mackenzie as if she had all day.

"How long did it take to fix your tire?"

"About an hour."

Her look was compassionate. "Did it make you late for anything?"

"No. I was just headed home when it happened."

"Where is home?"

"Across State Line. Zephyr Cove."

"Oh, that's a pretty area. Have you lived there long?"

"Since January."

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Roz nodded but stayed quiet as many more questions crowded her mind. She did not want to appear nosy. There was something very vulnerable about the woman she had seen two days ago. The woman today was composed, confident, and sure of herself, but the woman she'd seen earlier would not leave her mind.

"I wanted to check with you, Mackenzie. You weren't hurt the other day, were you?"

"No." Mackenzie's cheeks heated slightly, thinking of the way she had cried. "It had just been a long, frustrating day."

"I've had those." Roz smiled and took a sip of coffee.

Mackenzie then remembered hers. She glanced at Josh and found his eyes on her. He smiled and ducked his head a little.

"You're going to be late, Josh," his mother told him kindly. "He mows the lawn at the church," Roz informed Mackenzie. "It's nice that he can pick his own hours, but sometimes I think it's easier to have a set schedule."

Mackenzie nodded. "My sister would agree. She's an illustrator, and unless she has a deadline breathing down her neck or is really excited about an idea, she leaves it until the last minute."

"She does the illustrations for the books you write, doesn't she?"

"Yes, and also some freelance work for a few children's magazines."

Roz was paging through the book Mackenzie brought, slightly awed that she knew the author.

"Has your sister sold any of her work on its own?"

"You mean framed prints? No. She's had some of her originals framed, and I have a few of them, but other than the Micah Bear posters that our publisher puts out, all her work is in books or magazines."

"At the risk of sounding rude, Mackenzie, you seem very young to be so established."

"I am young." Mackenzie was not offended. "I was just 23 last month, and Delancey won't be 22 until next week. And of course when we started, we were quite a bit younger."

"What a special gift."

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It was so much like something her mother would say that Mackenzie stiffened to keep her emotions at bay. Roz didn't notice. She was drinking her coffee again.

When Mackenzie later tried to recall exactly what happened next, she couldn't quite do it. But before anyone could say anything else, both Sabrina and Josh went on their way, Josh saying how nice it was to meet her, and Sabrina telling her she would give the book to Jonathan as soon as she saw him. Roz saw her family off. They were no more out the door when the bell rang.

"That'll be the gang for Bible study, Mackenzie," Roz said as she pushed to her feet. "Don't feel that you have to rush off. We're studying the life of Christ, and you're welcome to stay."

Mackenzie nearly bolted for the door. The kindness the woman displayed to her was the only thing that kept her from slipping out the back patio door and running for the Jeep.

"Come on in," she heard Roz say, and moments later Mackenzie was being introduced to Margie, Kathy, Susan, and Gary. They all greeted her as if she were one of the gang, set their things aside, and gathered in the living room with their Bibles. Mackenzie felt she had no choice but to follow.

"We're in the book of Mark," Roz explained to Mackenzie, before Gary, clearly the leader, took over.

"I think I'll pray before we get started," he said, and Mackenzie bowed with the others, her gaze focused wide-eyed on her lap.

"Father in heaven," she heard Gary say, "thank You for this time we can meet around Your Word. Open our hearts and help us to listen. Amen.

"Let's get right into chapter 3 where we left off. Oh, Roz, maybe you could get Mackenzie a Bible."

"You can share with me." Since she was on the sofa next to Mackenzie, Kathy offered and shifted the Bible until it sat between them.

"Thank you," Mackenzie replied automatically, thinking she had to get out of there before she suffocated.

"Okay, I want you to follow along as I read verses 13 through 15," Gary said. '"And He went up to the mountain and summoned those whom He Himself wanted, and they came to Him. And He appointed twelve, that they might be with Him,

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and that He might send them out to preach, and to have authority to cast out the demons.'

"What do we see here that we've been seeing since the beginning of the book?"

"Christ's authority," Margie answered immediately.

"Exactly," Gary said with a smile. "It's amazing. Demons fall on their faces in His presence. A man's hand-withered and useless-is suddenly healed. Christ's authority is unmistakable in every chapter. Some people come for healing and some come out of curiosity, but His authority leaves them all without excuse. This
has
to be God's Son.

"Now in the three verses I just read you, there was a certain order of things that I see as significant. Do you see in verse 14, the first requirement of the disciples is that they be with Christ? Did you catch that? Now what's the second one?"

In spite of herself, Mackenzie read verse 14 in Kathy's Bible and saw the words, "that He might send them out to preach," She had only just finished reading it when Roz gave that very answer.

"That's right," Gary confirmed again. "Before the preaching and before He gives them authority of their own, He wants them to be with Him. Isn't that interesting? Remember back in chapter 1, verse 35, when early in the morning Jesus goes off to a lonely place to pray? Now you know me well enough to know that I'm not saying the only time we can meet with the Lord is in the morning, but don't miss the significance of these verses. This God-Man, this Jesus Christ, He knew where to start. He knew what He needed, so He met with His Father before the day began. He knew what the disciples needed-they needed His example and teaching above all else-so the first thing He required of them was to be with Him.

"I think about these passages when I hear myself telling the Lord that I'm tired of being a father to three active teens and that I don't want to make the effort anymore, or when I find myself wondering why I can't seem to say no to a persistent temptation. I ask myself if I've taken care of first things first. Have I been in the Word and prayer like I need to be? Above all else, are they a priority?"

His eyes moved around the room, but Mackenzie didn't feel singled out, only fascinated at what she was hearing. The authority of Christ had never before occurred to her. Gary was

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almost through with the hour-long study before she remembered that she wanted nothing to do with this God-Man, His authority, or anything else.

And in fact, Gary and the women didn't hang around. They thanked Roz and were swiftly on their way, leaving Mackenzie alone with her again. She didn't get comfortable but stood in such a way that Roz knew she wanted to go.

"I'm so glad you could join us, Mackenzie."

"Thank you for your kindness, Roz, but I have to tell you that I really don't want anything to do with Jesus Christ."

"Can you tell me why, Mackenzie?" Roz asked openly.

"I just-" she began but couldn't find the words. She struggled for a moment, but Roz cut back in.

"I shouldn't have asked that, Mackenzie. I'm sorry. You're welcome here even if you don't want to talk about Christ, but I would like to tell you something."

Mackenzie steeled herself for Roz to tell her she was praying for her, but that didn't happen. Roz simply put a hand on Mackenzie's arm and spoke softly.

"You're a different person today than you were yesterday. Yesterday you were crying and upset, and even though you're confident and collected today, I can still see that you're hurting. You hide it very well, but I can see it. You're welcome back to Bible study. We meet every Thursday morning at ten o'clock, and I hope you'll come, but I also hope you'll come back and hear
my
story. Five years ago I was not the person I am today, and I'd like to tell you about it. If you don't leave with anything else today, Mackenzie, I hope you leave knowing that I like you and that you're welcome here anytime you wish."

Mackenzie wanted to cry all over again but managed not to. She thanked her hostess yet again and moved out the door. Almost in a state of shock, she drove home. She was not angry, just alone and confused. It was hours before she realized she desperately needed to talk with her sister.

Chicago

Chet tenderly kissed Delancey goodnight and slipped out the door. They had spent a wonderful evening together, and for the first time ever, he had spoken of the future. He was growing tired

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of being on call at the airline and had gone so far as to ask Delancey what she thought of France. He had heard about a small airline there that favored American pilots. Delancey had loved France when she was there with Mackenzie, and without much encouragement, she saw herself married to Chet and living in a little French villa where she could paint and draw to her heart's content.

If the phone hadn't rung, Delancey might have merrily dreamed all night, but hearing the sound of her sister's voice was worth coming back to earth.

"What have you been up to? Writing like mad?"

"Off and on. I've been lying in the sun like a lazy fool, so I'm tan but dry as a bone. One of these days I'll get writing again. Pax keeps calling, and I never return his calls. I wouldn't be surprised to open my front door one of these days and find him standing there."

"I'm sure you're right," Delancey laughed. "He's not about to let his top novelist stray too far. By the way, Chet just told me he read
Access Denied
and loved it. It was all I could do not to tell him."

"But you didn't."

"No. After all this time, it's become almost a habit to stay quiet about it."

"I'm glad you did, Deej. I'm not ready for anyone to know. By the way, is he taking you out for your birthday next week?"

"Yes." Delancey filled her in, but in truth Mackenzie was only half attending. When there was a slight lull, she finally found the courage to say what she had called about.

"Hey, D.J?"

"Yeah."

"Do you know what I did this morning?"

"What?"

"I went to a Bible study." Mackenzie's voice was lighter than she felt, and her hand gripped the phone so hard that she was getting a cramp.

"You're kidding." Delancey's voice grew rather cool.

"No. It was so weird. I mean, not the people, but I was at this lady's house-I just met her Tuesday-and then her Bible study group showed up and there was no way to leave."

"Was it awful?"

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"No," Mackenzie answered, surprised that she was able to say so. "It really wasn't. I mean, I don't agree with it, not personally, but this man made it very interesting."

"You're not thinking of going back are you?" Delancey sounded so horrified that Mackenzie took a moment to answer.

"Well, I don't know. It was kind of interesting."

Mackenzie was not prepared for her sister's anger.

"You can't be serious!"

"Well, I haven't decided or anything like that," Mackenzie said, trying to defend herself.

"I can't believe what I'm hearing." There was no disguising Delancey's ire. "I have never known you to be a hypocrite, Mackenzie. What's come over you?"

"Why does my going make me a hypocrite?" Mackenzie asked in genuine confusion.

"You've never wanted anything to do with God, Mic, and you know it. Anytime I've ever brought it up, you said that's fine for me but to leave you out."

Mackenzie felt stunned. Why had she thought she could talk to her sister about this? Her heart felt so crushed she thought it might break. She didn't say anything for some time, and Delancey finally heard herself.

"I'm sorry, Mic. I didn't mean that." Her voice was soft and hurt as well. "I don't know why I said it. I'm just so surprised."

"It's all right, Delancey. I understand."

But things were not all right, and neither sister understood. For the first time either woman could remember, there was a barrier between them. Delancey felt threatened that her sister might turn to a God that she had always hated. It was so inconsistent with who Delancey knew her sister to be that she was shaken. Mackenzie felt as though she was all alone on a desert island. They hung up after five more minutes of uncomfortable conversation, but things did not feel good.