Playing With Seduction (17 page)

She got the impression he wasn’t expressing his gratitude for her offer of coffee. His eyes were dark and serious, and something deep in her chest fluttered nervously. “For?” she prompted.

“Just being you,” he said, his words simple, yet his tone was low and intimate. “Sweet. Kind. Generous. Those qualities are hard to find in a woman. Or at least they have been for me.”

His comment was so unexpected a lump rose in her throat. She didn’t know what to say to that, and he spoke again before she could come up with a response.

A small smile kicked up the sides of his mouth. “And thank you for giving me, and us, a chance.”

She set her coffee cup on the counter, the panic she hadn’t experienced earlier now rushing to the surface. “Jase, this…
affair
doesn’t change anything between us.” They both
knew
that.

He squeezed his eyes shut as if he were in some kind of pain, then opened them again. “Jesus, I want it to. So bad.”

His words caused something deep in her chest to hurt and made her want things that weren’t possible between them. But she couldn’t lie to him, or herself right now, either. “I feel the same way,” she admitted, and swallowed hard. “But we both know we can’t treat this like anything more than it is. An affair.”

He stared at her for a long moment before he exhaled a deep breath. “You’re right. I’m sorry. It’s just…I’ve never felt a connection with a woman like this before.”

She related to that one hundred percent, but instead of confirming anything emotional on her end—because yeah, those feelings for him were there and could spiral out of control if she let them—she opted to keep things focused on
him
. “I’m sure you’ve had a few solid relationships over the years.”

He picked up her hand and just held it, the gesture so sweet it made her heart ache. “I had a girlfriend in high school for two years. It wasn’t a mature connection as much as it was infatuation and young love. She broke up with me when I went into the Air Force.” He shrugged his shoulder, clearly not affected by the end of that relationship. “And dating women while I was stationed all over the place in the military was difficult, though I did have a thing with another female officer for a while.”

“A thing?” she asked curiously.

“A friendship with side benefits,” he said as he absently stroked his fingers along her knuckles. “It was pretty mutual. We were together for a year and a half, then she met another guy, and that was the end of that.”

He was so matter-of-fact about it all. “You weren’t…hurt?”

“No, because I wasn’t invested in the relationship. I mean, I cared for her, but I wasn’t devastated when she moved on.”

She realized that Jase had never been in a long-term, committed kind of relationship as an adult. She understood how being in the military could make it difficult to build a connection with a woman, but that knowledge made Jase seem even younger and the age difference between them seem even wider. Or maybe it just made her feel older than her thirty-five years, which wasn’t a great feeling, either.

When she remained quiet, he went on. “This. Us. It just feels different in so many ways, and I wanted you to know that.”

No, damn him.
She didn’t want to know that at all! Because that knowledge had the potential to mess with her head and her heart.

His gaze shifted to the clock on the wall, then back to her, and he smiled again. “Now I
really
have to go or I’m going to be late.”

She could tell he was hesitant to leave after that huge reveal, but he leaned in and kissed her on the cheek, a sweet, chaste kiss that was so at odds with all the passion that had burned so hot and bright between them less than a half hour ago.

“I’ll pick you up at seven for dinner tonight,” he said as she walked with him to the door.

“Okay,” she said before she could think better of her decision, because despite knowing how emotionally dangerous their relationship could become, she wasn’t ready to walk away or let him go.

“I
have to
say, for an older woman, she’s fucking hot.”

Jase had been just about ready to toss his metal ring across the yard to the fifty-point wooden peg in the grass thirty feet away when that crass comment abruptly stopped him.

He slowly straightened and glanced at Adam, a co-worker and the newest employee at Noble and Associates. The guy was thirty-two years old, had been in the Marines, and was trained in Intelligence Operations. On paper, he had all the qualifications of a competent and skilled operative, which was why Dean had hired him, but over the past month of getting to know Adam, Jase found there was just something about the guy that rubbed him the wrong way—like this immaturity that he’d seen glimpses of before.

And now, today, at a casual Saturday barbecue at Jillian and Dean’s home that Jase had attended with Kendall, Adam was running his mouth and saying rude shit that Jase didn’t appreciate one bit.

Wanting to give the other man the chance to rethink his stupid-ass remark, Jase tipped his head and spoke more calmly than he felt. “Excuse me?”

“Your girlfriend.” Adam waved his fifth bottle of beer toward the back patio, where Kendall was sitting with the girls, drinking some kind of fruity concoction while laughing at something Raina said. “Isn’t she, like, almost forty? At least, that’s what I think one of the guys told me, though she doesn’t look like it.”

Jase clenched his jaw, his initial irritation turning into full-blown anger. “Are you fucking kidding me right now, Adam?”

Eyes wide, the other man put his hands up in a gesture meant to calm Jase down. “Hey, it was a compliment. I mean, I hear older women are freaks between the sheets because they’re at their sexual prime and want it all the time, so that makes you one lucky bastard.”

Jase’s hands curled into fists, and it took supreme effort for him not to punch Adam in the face for being such an asshole. “Shut. The. Fuck. Up,” he said succinctly, then dropped his metal ring on the grass and turned and walked away before he made a scene.

He exhaled a deep breath to ease the tension building in his chest and headed toward where the guys were standing around talking. Everyone had already eaten the barbecue ribs and sides that Dean and Jillian had served, and now it was just all about relaxing and enjoying the rest of the evening. Except Jase was far from feeling laid-back in any way whatsoever.

When Sawyer saw him approaching, he stepped away from the circle and met Jase a few feet away from everyone else, a concerned frown etching his features.

“Everything okay out there?” Sawyer asked as he glanced from Jase and back to Adam, who was now playing the ring toss game by himself. “Things were starting to look a little tense, and I get the feeling it had nothing to do with the lawn game you two were playing.”

“I’ll be fine,” Jase said, trying to shake off his annoyance but failing. “Adam has no fucking filter, and I just need a couple of minutes to cool off after a few rude comments he made.”

Sawyer raised a brow curiously. “About?”

“Kendall. And her age, along with some other insults.” Jase jammed his fingers through his hair in agitation. “It was like we were back in high school and he was angling to get the dirty details of my relationship with her.”

Sawyer shook his head. “Yeah, I’ve noticed that the guy is blunt, even juvenile at times despite
his
age, and it doesn’t help that he’s a drinker, which makes him even more obnoxious.”

Jase glared back at Adam. “Having a few beers isn’t an excuse to mouth off.”

“I think it’s worse than that,” Sawyer said quietly. “A complaint came in on Friday from a client that Adam came to the job smelling like he’d had an alcoholic drink after his lunch break. Adam denied it, so Dean gave him a warning and put him on probation. The firm can’t have that kind of liability.”

“Well, he’s definitely on his way to getting shit-faced here,” Jase said, his tone disgusted.

They moved back to the group to join the conversation about a company’s recent security breach that Mac had managed to avert. Eventually, Adam strolled up to the house, grabbed himself another beer, then joined the discussion. Jase deliberately kept a wide berth of the guy to avoid an altercation, though he was growing increasingly irked at the way Adam was watching Kendall from across the patio.

Jase’s gut churned, and that possessive feeling he harbored toward Kendall rose to the surface, the one that made him want to stake his claim on her right here and now. It was such a barbaric emotion, but over the past few weeks of dating her and sleeping with her and learning everything about her, that
need
for Kendall had only grown in depth. Not just his unquenchable desire for her but that elemental connection that was starting to make him feel anxious, like something profound was slipping through his fingers, even before it happened.

He didn’t want to fucking lose her.
That knowledge grew each day and night they spent together, morphing into an emotion that made him panic at times, because he knew he wasn’t at a place in his life to give her all the things she wanted and deserved. Unfortunately, he couldn’t change that fundamental gap between them that had
nothing
to do with their age difference, and neither could she.

She scooted away from the table she was sitting at, and while her girlfriends continued talking, she headed into the house by herself. That unsettling feeling in his stomach compelled him to follow her, to find a way to reassure himself that maybe, possibly, they could find a way to make a relationship between them work, even though he knew there was no easy solution, that they each had their own solid reasons for holding back.

At the moment, none of that mattered. Only Kendall did.

He expected her to go into the kitchen, but instead she veered down the hall to the bathroom. As he waited for her to exit, that unfamiliar restlessness inside him increased, and by the time she opened the door, he was desperate to slake the need billowing inside of him. And satisfy that soul-deep hunger that all started, and ended, with her.

She let out a gasp of surprise when she saw him standing there, and he crowded her right back into the bathroom, beyond caring that they were in his boss’s house, and anyone could figure out what he was about to do to her. He couldn’t wait, the urgency within him coiling so tight it threatened to break him.

“Jase, what are you doing?” she whispered as he shut and locked the door, then guided her back toward the vanity.

Grasping her waist, he lifted her so she was sitting on the smooth, flat surface, her legs dangling over the side, and ignored the
you can’t be serious about having sex here
look on her face.

“I need you. Right here. Right now.” As hard as his cock was, he realized that this moment, for him, wasn’t all about sex and getting off. It was about knowing she was his, and chasing away all those uncertainties lingering between them. Even if was just for a few minutes.

He pushed her legs wide apart, grateful that she’d worn a lightweight dress, and stood between her spread thighs. Her lips parted to speak, and he plowed his hands into her hair, gripping the strands tight in his fist as he crushed his mouth to hers. Any protest she’d been about to make was lost in his all-consuming kiss, and instead she moaned and softened against him, and the hands she’d curled into his T-shirt released the material so she could slide her arms around his neck and return the embrace.

He dropped his eager hands to her thighs and quickly pushed the hem of her dress up around her hips, already knowing, and accepting, that this coupling was going to be fast and hot and hard—just how he needed it,
needed her
.

No thinking. Just feeling.

Tearing open the fly of his jeans, he shoved the denim and his briefs down over his ass until his cock sprang free. He managed to retrieve the one condom he had in his wallet, and even while she was kissing him, he managed to roll it down his erection. Reckless urgency drove him, and he slid his arms under her legs and lifted her knees, which tipped her body backwards. Her shoulders pressed against the mirror behind her, and his shaft was positioned between her thighs. The only thing separating them was her silky panties.

He met her gaze, the unconditional desire blazing in her eyes humbling him, arousing him, making him so delirious to be inside of her that his body shook. “Give me what I want, Kendall,” he demanded in a low, rough voice. “Give me what I need.”

She didn’t hesitate to reach down and pull the front panel of her panties to the side, exposing her soft, gleaming pussy to him. Her other hand guided his cock forward, until the head was pressed a few inches inside her slick channel. With a brutal thrust of his hips, he was buried to the hilt, and he didn’t stop there.

He continued pumping into her, hard and deep and fierce, and since her legs were draped over his forearms and spread wide apart, he was able to look down to where their bodies joined and watch as his cock drove in and out of her gorgeous cunt. She was so sweet and hot and lush and so damn addicting he didn’t know if he’d ever get enough of her.