Pink & Patent Leather (3 page)

It still took me a couple of moments for me to get what he was saying. I was slow to answer because I wanted to come corre
ct. And especially since he was my best friend, I wanted to tell him the truth.

“
I can’t do that, Xavier.”

The way his eyebrows rose, I could tell he was surprised by my answer. “
Why not? Are you seeing someone that I don’t know about?” He laughed and I knew why he did. It would’ve been impossible for me to be seeing someone else with the amount of time that I spent with him.

“
No, it’s not that, but you’re close.” When he frowned, I added, “It’s not that I’m seeing someone else because I don’t have to. God has already shown me the man who’s going to be my husband.”

A couple of seconds went by before Xavier said, “
Wow.” Then, after a pause, he said, “Well, first of all, I didn’t ask you to marry me.”

“
I know that, but it doesn’t make sense to start something that we can’t finish.”

“
Okay, I get that, but where’s this man that God has shown you? Why don’t you spend time with him?”

“
It’s complicated,” I said, knowing that there was no way I could say anymore. When it was time for Pastor Malik and I to come out to the world, we would do that together. “You have to trust me, and believe me,” I added. “I love you as a friend, but it can never be anything more.”

Xavier had said, “
All right,” that night. But he never gave up.

The thing was, though, even
if God hadn’t chosen my husband for me already, it could never be X. He didn’t have the same up-bringing and for me, that would never do. He was nothing more than a common man with a stereotypical tag. Yes, he was an aspiring minister, yes, he was in his last year of law school and was studying to pass the bar, yes, one day he’d be an amazing attorney. But even with all of that, he was no Pastor Malik.

My parents knew that, too. From the day my father first laid his eyes on Xavier my dad felt “
that boy” was no good. My mother and father had actually met Xavier before I did.

“
Pastor stood at the altar,” my father began to tell me the story, “and gave the invitation for anyone who wanted to join the church to come forward. That boy strutted down the aisle like he was at some rap concert rather than in the Lord’s Holy place. Every woman in that sanctuary from five to ninety-five sat up and paid attention.” My father had shaken his head like the whole thing still disgusted him. “But he didn’t fool me, baby girl. I know his kind and his kind is not good enough for you.”

That was my father
’s warning to me when I’d told him and my mother about the young minister I’d been introduced to by Pastor Malik. Once my father realized that I was talking about Xavier, he wanted to make sure that I wasn’t interested in anything besides having a cup of coffee with Xavier.

My father continued his case against Xavier like he was in court, “
I can’t even believe that my alma mater accepted him. Morehouse must be lowering their standards.”

My dad didn
’t have anything to worry about. Even though he was about to be a lawyer and pastor, I was never going to get with Xavier, though I did hope that we would always be friends.

I had to blink a couple of times to bring myself back to the p
resent, back to my bedroom. But even though my mind was back on what I was going to do tonight with Pastor Malik, Xavier was still on my mind. My parents were going to be very hurt by what I was going to do, but Xavier would be the one who was hurt most of all.

But that wasn
’t completely my fault. Even though I’d tried to warn X, there were times when we did behave like boyfriend and girlfriend. Especially when our friendship had turned kind of intimate. We’d gone from kissing, to fondling, to other things that most girls only did with their boyfriends. But I’d never done those things for my physical pleasure nor for Xavier’s. Everything I did in my life had one purpose only—Pastor Malik. And the only reason I’d gone that far with Xavier was that it made sense to me to be ready for Pastor Malik in every way. Because once we were together, I had to be sure that I was better in bed with him than his wife had been. 

So with Xavier, I practiced a lot. Of course, while there were things that I did with my mouth,
I was still a virgin. Only Pastor Malik would have me in that way.

When I glanced at my bedside clock, I couldn
’t believe that only fifteen minutes had passed since I’d gotten dressed. So many thoughts had gone through my mind, I felt like I’d relived the last nine months with Xavier.

Now though, it was time for my new beginning. It was time to put the past behind me and step into my future. It was time for Pastor Malik Stroman to see the woman that Sasha Simone Jansen had become.

I slid the chain-strap of my designer bag onto my shoulder, grabbed the gift that I’d bought, then clasped my fingers over the handle of my overnight bag. I was finally ready to go.

Chapter 3

Pulling in front of the
Willard Hotel didn’t stop my nerves. Even though Pastor Malik was my mission, Xavier was still on my mind. How would he react to all of this? Would he figure it out right away? Would he be hurt or would he be angry?

I truly hoped that Xavier
wouldn’t
be hurt, but if he were, all he had to do was look back and remember all that I’d told him. He’d see that I’d always been honest and upfront. X was the one who had settled for whatever bone I’d tossed his way.

Although I was anxious, I was really looking forward to the freedom t
hat tonight would bring. The smoke would clear, and for the first time everyone, including Xavier would have clarity. Everyone would see what I’d seen all along. Everyone would see God’s plan in action.

As I waited for the valet attendant to come over to m
y car, I rested my head against the headrest embossed with a capital “P.” I was already feeling exhausted and this night hadn’t even started yet. What had me most nervous was that I didn’t have any idea how this night was going to end.

When the attendant c
ame over to my car and opened the door, I reached over the passenger seat and picked up the gift that I had for Pastor Malik. Then, I slid my legs out and noticed the way the young guy’s eyes dropped. His eyes moved from my legs, all the way up when I stepped completely out of my BMW.

“
Welcome...to the...Willard,” he stuttered.

“
Thank you. I’m here for Pastor Malik Stroman’s Anniversary Celebration.”

“
Yes. That’s in the Crystal ballroom.”

“
Thank you,” I said as I tucked my ticket into my purse. “I need you to do me a favor and keep my car right here in the front. I won’t be long,” I told the man.

I waited until he nodded before I turned away. Having my car right here was an important part of my plan. There were two ways that this could go and one of the outc
omes would cause me to make a quick getaway.

As I sauntered into the hotel, I felt the valet attendant
’s eyes on me. Once I stepped into the lobby, I felt even more people turning to take a look as I strolled through the hotel. I was used to the attention, but none of it ever mattered to me. I lived for only one man’s reaction.

The Willard had always been one of my daddy
’s favorite places to dine, and tonight, as I made my way to the ballroom I did what I had done so many times as a child. I marveled at the striking green columns and the dazzling crystal chandeliers that hung perfectly over my head. The turn of the century opulence of the hotel helped me to understand clearly that my parents had raised me in the fashion of royalty.

Stepping off of the elev
ator, I took one final, long cleansing breath before I entered the ballroom. The space was packed with at least five hundred members of Grace Tabernacle, though I wasn’t surprised. This was a celebration to honor Pastor Malik for his ten years in the ministry. He had come to Grace Tabernacle a young man in his twenties and now he’d matured spiritually and physically into his thirties.

Chatter and light music filled the bright room as I made my way through the crowd. I
’d been going to Grace Tabernacle since I was a child, so there were many familiar faces. But I was careful not to make eye contact with anyone. And no one stopped me because they weren’t quite sure if this was me. I hadn’t been home in four years, and though my face had stayed the same, the rest of me was a complete transformation.

I pushed my way through the maze of tables as people stood around talking. It looked like dinner had already been served. That meant that the program was about to begin.

Like everything else in my life, this was perfect. Perfect timing.

My view to the front of the ballroom was blocked with all of the people milling around. But then after just a couple of turns, I saw him. Pastor Malik sat at the dais, gracing everyone with a smile that was bright and filled with love.

That made me smile, too, although for a second, my joy faded when I saw his wife, sitting next to him. Of course, she would be there; she was always there. But I was happy again when I turned my attention back to him.

Malik was more handsome than I rememb
ered, more regal because now he sported a very low trimmed beard. His brown complexion glowed and his smile was “rock star” perfect. The tux he wore finished his look of pure sophistication.

It made me want him all the more.

“Pink, is that you?”

I turned
around to face Mother Pearl, who looked exactly the same as she did six years ago, on the day she prepared me and the rest of the girls for the Purity Ceremony. She looked about ninety-years-old then, and she looked about ninety-nine-years-old now.

“
That is you,” she exclaimed. Even though I towered over her, she pulled me to her ample breasts. She squeezed me so tight, I wondered if she was purposely trying to smother me.

“
It’s good to see you,” I said, even though right now, that wasn’t true. I didn’t want to see anyone except for Pastor Malik.

“
It’s good to see you, chile. We’re so glad to have you home. And so proud of you.”

Once Mother Pearl called me out, there were others who took notice, and took my attention away from where I wanted it to be.

But then, when Ms. Odom, the church secretary stood at the mic and announced, “Would all the heads of the ministry please come forward,” that was my cue.

“
Excuse me,” I said to Mother Pearl and the others who stood around me.

This was the part of the program where each of the ministries presented the pastor with a gift. And my gift was going to be as important as anyone
’s.

My strut was filled with purpose. As I moved toward Pastor Malik, I pretended that I was on the runway dur
ing fashion week, and he was the top-of-the-line designer looking for his next million-dollar girl.

He hadn
’t seen me yet, but his wife did. I could tell from her frown and then the way her eyes widened that it took a moment for complete recognition to set in. Slowly, she rose as if somehow, that was supposed to intimidate me. Her eyes scanned my body, but I kept moving like I didn’t care (which I didn’t) and that seemed to intimidate her. For just a moment, she looked away from me, and glanced down at herself. What a bad move. She had just put her insecurities on full display and with good reason.

Mrs. Stroman was probably one of the tackiest women at our church. I often wondered about her age because if she was in her thirties like Pastor Malik, I couldn
’t tell. Especially not from the 1980’s-style clothes that she wore.

I
’d never seen her hair in any other style than what she was wearing tonight—the greasy curl. It was as if her hair had been set on rollers, then, the curlers were taken out. After that, her hair had been greased, but someone forgot the final step—of styling her hair.

It wasn
’t just her hairstyle that was a hot mess. That floral printed shift that she wore almost made me laugh out loud.  Who wore floral to an evening event? And to top things off, she had on kitten heels. She was so below-average, it hurt my eyes to look at her. 

I was still a few feet away from the dais, when she looked away from me and said to her husband, “
Here, sweetheart, open this one first.”

She handed Pastor Malik th
e package as if that would keep his attention away from me. Please! He would have to be blind to miss what I was offering.

When I was just a few steps from front and center, I felt a hand on my bare arm. I knew who it was before I even turned and faced him
. Xavier. In the moment when our eyes met, I saw his questions, then his understanding, then his indignation.

“
I thought you said you weren’t feeling well,” Xavier whispered. “I thought that’s why you said you weren’t coming. Why you didn’t want to come here with me.”

That was the story that I had given him, but Xavier was smart. I could tell by the way he peered through me that his thoughts were going through all kinds of machinations and calculations. And in only a few seconds, he had the answer to the eq
uation that had been in his mind. He said, “Him? Pink, really? Him?”

I didn
’t part my lips.

“
He’s the man that you think God....”

He didn
’t finish his sentence and I still said nothing.

At first, I thought he was going to laugh at me, but his face stayed s
tern. “You’re making a mistake.”

As gently as I could, I snatched my arm away and without a word to Xavier, I kept on moving. In just a couple of steps, I was there. Right in front of Pastor Malik.

It was as if my presence stopped everything. No one spoke, no one moved. Everyone just kept their eyes on me.

“
Hello Malik.” For the first time ever, I left the ‘Pastor’ from in front of his name. Because it was time.

His eyes squinted just slightly, as if he was trying to hide the way his glance roamed over al
l of my new womanly curves.

With my eyes on him, I offered my gift to him.

“Thank you, Pink,” he said softly. Then, he stood, leaned over and kissed my cheek.

That two second touch sent a spark straight through my body. A spark that settled in the center
of my womanhood. A spark that I wasn’t expecting.

He sat back down, but his beautiful brown eyes that were dark and soulful and covered with curly, dark lashes, never left me. He watched me, standing there poised and perfect. Even when his wife said, “
Sweetheart, you have other gifts you have to open first,” he stayed still with his eyes on me.

He ignored his wife
’s words and lifted the top of the oblong box that I’d given him. His fingers caressed the silk Brooks Brother’s tie and then, when he raised the pink tie to his chest, the small platinum ring that I had finally taken off this morning fell into his lap.

At first, his handsome face was carved with lines of confusion. But then, he raised his eyebrows and I knew that he remembered. And he understood.

I stood frozen, excited, and scared. He had to say something, and in a moment, I would know whether those words I’d spoken six years ago had haunted him or inspired him.

He said, “
Thank you, Sister Pink.”

It wasn
’t his words that got to me. It was what happened next. It was his smile. His bright, wide smile that was meant just for me.

It was on!

I waited just another moment, just in case he was willing to give up everything and come with me right then. But when he didn’t move and stayed behind the dais, I understood. He couldn’t just walk away from his wife like this. This was going to take planning and time.

That was fine with me. I believed God
’s word when He said everything decently and in order. I had waited this long. Another night or two wouldn’t matter.

I winked, then pivoted, and sauntered away with a whole lot of promise in my strut.

I was about halfway to the door when it dawned on me that just maybe he could have missed the message. So, I stopped, turned back around, and even though half of the ballroom would be able to hear me, I said, “You’re welcome, Malik. Anything for you.”

Then, I kept walking, making eye contact with no one. I didn
’t stop when I got to the ballroom door. I didn’t even stop to wait for the elevator, instead, taking the stairs. I didn’t stop until I got to the front of the hotel and handed the valet my ticket for my car.

The same attendant who
’d helped me out of my car, helped me back in and I gave him a twenty-dollar tip before I glanced in my rearview mirror and then sped away.

It was only then that I breathed. I had expected Xavier to be right behind me, but I made a clean getaway. Wasn
’t sure if Xavier had followed me, but I was sure that I got away.

When I turned onto Pennsylvani
a Avenue, I let myself smile. That had gone better than I expected, actually. Even though I hoped, I had never expected tonight to be the actual night. It had been nothing but wishful thinking to believe that Malik could just walk out of his celebration and come with me, although I was absolutely sure that’s what he wanted to do. But good things came to those who waited. Malik and I would have our night. Very soon. With the way he had looked at me, I knew that.

Nothing and no one could now stop the inevitab
le.

It was going to happen.

Men were so predictable.

Xavier was right in the lobby of the church waiting for me, just the way I knew he would be. Just like I knew that not ten minutes after I got into my car last night, my phone would star
t blowing up.