Read Perilous Pranks (Renaissance Faire Mystery) Online
Authors: Joyce Lavene,Jim Lavene
Tags: #Mystery, #Ghost, #Humorous, #Women Sleuths
A little on the weird side, maybe.
“Jessie isn’t responsible for what happened to Wanda.” Chase stepped in to defend me like the chivalrous knight he was.
“Except that she had a long-term disagreement with Miss Le Fey, which had led to several confrontations that I know of—not the
least
of which was dyeing the dead woman blue. How could I possibly
not
think that Jessie was responsible for this murder?”
That hadn’t gone so well. Chase glanced at me. He hadn’t given up.
Before he could have another go at telling Detective Almond that I was innocent, I stood up for myself. “Yes, it’s true. I put the blue dye in the showerhead to get back at her for gluing my skirt to a chair in the tavern. But she was expecting it. That doesn’t mean I killed her. She was dead when I found her.”
“Another point
not
in your favor.” Detective Almond’s smile was smug. “I’m guessing that was your handprint on the shower glass too.”
“I know.” I produced my mug. “Someone also put Wanda’s bracelet at the museum to set me up. I locked the door before I left, so you can go over the scene in case the
real
killer left some clues.”
I explained about the white spot on Wanda’s arm where the bracelet had been—in case he hadn’t noticed.
He took the mug from me, glanced in it, and then handed it off to an officer. “I really appreciate your help, Jessie. Maybe we should start with where you were at around six a.m. this morning.”
“She was with me,” Chase volunteered. “We were together all night.”
“Since you’re the constable of this place, it might be better if you don’t get involved personally in the investigation,” Detective Almond told him.
“Okay—I quit. If being Bailiff for the village means I can’t defend Jessie then I quit.”
I knew Detective Almond didn’t want that to happen. He wanted Chase to stay where he was. If he left, that would mean Myrtle Beach would have to assign another trained officer to take his place.
“Let’s not be hasty. I know you love your job here. We just need to be unbiased.”
“Maybe you should take that to heart,” Chase shot back. “I don’t think immediately pegging her as the killer is unbiased either.”
Detective Almond gave in. “Fair enough. I’m going to question other possible suspects. You have to admit, your girlfriend looks to be on top of the list. She had motive. She may have had opportunity. And if I remember correctly, she’s pretty good with a sword, which my assistant medical examiner tells me is probably the weapon used by the killer.”
“First of all, she’s my fiancée. You know that. We’re getting married in a month. And second, I told you she was with me all night. You can take opportunity
off
that list.”
They were talking about me like I wasn’t even there.
“Excuse me,” I interrupted their debate. “I don’t think we got up until seven a.m. and the showerhead prank was set up yesterday afternoon while she was working. Someone told me she took showers in the morning before work.”
“How did you get into her home?” Detective Almond demanded.
“Everyone knows she leaves her door open while she’s at the First Aid Station. It only took me a few minutes to get the dye ready.”
He was writing down what I’d said in a small notebook and glanced up as I finished. “And you set this up by yourself? No help from anyone else?”
I thought about Shakespeare, who was a big help in relaying Wanda’s habits to me so I could make the prank happen. He wasn’t actually at the cottage while I was putting in the dye pack, but he was there right after me that morning.
I wasn’t giving him up, at least not yet, not until I had a chance to talk to him.
“I was alone. It wasn’t hard to do,” I responded. “Are you going to arrest me?”
“No.” He put away his notebook. “Not right now anyway. Show me where you found the bracelet.”
We walked down the path that took us past the castle and Mirror Lake where the pirate ship was in the process of sailing toward the Lady of the Lake Tavern.
The Hanging Tree was beside it
.
Public hangings of unfortunates happened at least once a day here. It was always surprising to me how many visitors
wanted
to be publically hanged. They signed up for it as they entered the gate, and even paid extra for the privilege.
Of course it was all staged, like the stocks where visitors threw squishy vegetables and fruit at each other for supposed wrongs—and almost everything else in the Village.
We walked past Eve’s Garden where they sold live plants and herbs used for food and medicine during the Renaissance. There was a tour and a tasting. It was never as popular as I thought it should be. There were some interesting plant poisons used during that time.
As we reached the mermaid lagoon at the far end of the lake, Detective Almond’s eyebrows shot up. “Where are the mermaids?”
Usually, the mermaids would have been sunning themselves on large rocks in the water. They’d flick their tails and giggle as they waved. They each wore long blond wigs that covered their shoulders, and left plenty of cleavage showing from their bikini tops.
But it was November and the hot days of summer were behind us. The mermaids would be back again in May.
“It’s too cold,” Chase explained. “Everyone asks about them.”
I watched dozens of people make a sharp turn to the left to visit the mermaids after entering the Main Gate. Their looks of disappointment mimicked Detective Almonds’.
“I’ve always liked the jousting,” he finally said, turning away from the empty lagoon. “I caught part of one of the Templar Knight horse shows earlier this year. They’re amazing horsemen.”
I knew deep down inside, Detective Almond liked the Ren Faire. He had a hard time admitting it. He’d been the first bailiff when the park had opened. It was probably still in his blood.
“I thought I caught a vibe this morning.” Former police officer Tom Grigg shook hands with his ex-boss. “I heard Wanda Le Fey was murdered.”
Grigg had been assigned as an undercover officer at the Village. He’d gone native and stayed on as Tom, Tom the Piper’s son, but now he sailed on the Queen’s Revenge and had a tattoo and gold tooth to prove it.
“Yeah.” Detective Almond tried not to look at his former contemporary—now in torn, black pants with a dirty white shirt tied around his waist. “She was dyed blue,” he glanced at me, “and
someone
shoved a sword through her heart.”
“Have you heard anything that could help?” Chase asked Grigg.
Grigg shook his head, his once super-short hair now down to his shoulders. “Nope. Sorry. She was at the Lady of the Lake a couple of days ago with a sweet young knight. We left them alone during the raid. Last time Captain Rafe went to her for a bad sprain, she wrapped it so tight—it almost cut off the circulation to his leg. We don’t mess with her if we can help it.”
This was the second time I’d heard about Wanda’s young lover. “Did you recognize the young man she was with?”
“Nope. Might not live in the Village.” There was a loud rumble as the pirate ship prepared to fire off one of her cannons. “Gotta go. Plunder calls!”
“Arrgh!”
Chase did the expected pirate fist pump. Grigg saluted him, and was gone.
‘Are they still pretending to kidnap visitors at the tavern?” Detective Almond gazed toward the ship in disgust. “They should’ve stopped that years ago.”
“We tried.” Chase shrugged his broad shoulders. “We got a lot of complaints. People love the pirate raid.”
Robin Hood, Maid Marion, and Little John were dressed in forest green with little green hats perched on their heads. They were battling the evil Sheriff of Nottingham for the attention of hundreds of visitors on the cobblestones. They repeated this, with some variations, every hour or so. Robin Hood always won, and led his men back into Sherwood Forest.
We walked past the spectacle quickly, and were almost to the manor house where the museum was being set up, when I heard a call from behind us. My twin brother, who was officially the promoter and web designer for the Merry Men, ran to catch up with us.
Tony looked a lot like like me, except with brown eyes—and male parts. He favored our father in appearance and disposition. I was more like our mother.
I had to admit he’d been more reliable in the last year since Robin Hood had put him to work. I hadn’t loaned him money in months.
“Hey! What’s going on, Lady Sis?” He grinned at Detective Almond and Chase.
“We’re on our way to the museum,” I told him. “Detective Almond thinks I murdered Wanda.”
Tony didn’t look surprised. “Was it the blue dye?”
“How many people in the Village knew about this prank?” Detective Almond asked with a snarl.
“Probably fifty or more.” Tony shrugged. “Someone even put it on the Internet. It was a super
awesome
prank.”
“Not so super
awesome
for the dead woman,” Detective Almond reminded him.
“I suppose not. But she had it coming. She knew it.” Tony stared at me. “What happened to her, if it wasn’t the dye?”
“Someone killed her with a sword.” I filled in the blanks.
“But not you?” he asked. “You wouldn’t do something that crazy, right? Unless she attacked you
because
you turned her blue. I’ll bet a lawyer could argue that issue.”
“We don’t have time for this,” Detective Almond said. “I want to see where you found the bracelet.”
Tony grinned. “Are you talking about that bracelet Jessie always loved? I remember her saying how she’d like to take it from Wanda.”
I sighed. “Thanks, Tony.”
Chapter Five
I pushed on for the manor house before my brother totally incriminated me. He’d managed to score another point against me in Detective Almond’s notebook.
I opened the front door to the museum, and a cold breeze swept past me, pushing around in little whirlwinds up and down the stairs.
I shivered. It was eighty degrees outside, and hotter in the building. Our ceiling fans weren’t on yet.
Where had that come from?
We went inside, and I showed everyone where I’d found the bracelet. Detective Almond called the crime scene team to go over the museum. I asked him to be careful— some of the older tapestries, the loom, and woodwork items were irreplaceable.
“Of course.” He held out his hand. “I’ll take the key to make sure this stays closed until the investigation is over.”
“Sure.” My hand shook as I gave him the key that represented my future in the Village.
“You’ve landed on your feet here.” He walked around and studied the vertical loom and Roger Trent’s glass-making equipment. “I hope you didn’t mess it all up for some stupid prank.”
If I’d thought it would help, I would’ve crossed my heart and sworn that I didn’t kill Wanda. That might’ve worked with some of my friends, but only time—and the end of this investigation—would remedy the situation. I needed to find Shakespeare. Maybe between us, we could prove that neither of us killed Wanda.
Chase put his arm around me, and I leaned into him as we walked back down the stairs to the cobblestones.
Around us, life in the Village played out. Fred the Red Dragon was growling at kids and making them shriek. The Green Man wobbled on his stilts, clothed by his tree costume, as visitors vied to have their pictures taken with him. Sam Da Vinci coaxed pretty women of all ages to allow him to draw their portraits. A young apprentice knight called out the time between jousts at the Field of Honor.
“It’s going to be okay,” Chase promised with a hug and a kiss on the forehead. “You have plenty to do getting ready for the wedding, right? Just concentrate on that right now. Wanda’s death will sort itself out.”
“At least Detective Almond didn’t arrest me.”
“That’s the spirit!” He hugged me again. “Let’s grab some lunch.”
We stopped for lunch at Peter’s Pub. Peter Greenwalt, the owner, waited on us, even though the pub was busy. His thick mutton chops, long hair, and heavy beard distinguished him. He was a nice man and a good shopkeeper.
“I’ve heard about your morning, Lady Jessie.” He smiled and bowed his head a little to show respect. “What would you like for lunch? On the house.”
“Thank you so much, kind sir.” There were dozens of visitors around us, snapping pictures and listening to our words. “Doth thou have a cheeseburger, and perhaps fries?”
He nodded. “Also a large Coke. And for you, Sir Bailiff?”
“I require the same fare, shopkeeper.” Chase regally inclined his head. It was expected of him to be a little aloof since he was only below the king and queen in Village status.
“Very good, sir. Your food will be out shortly.”
Sometimes it’s difficult living your life on a stage where hundreds of people are hanging on your every word, watching you, and taking pictures that are immediately posted to the Internet.
This was one of those times. I wished I could be alone to feel ragged by myself.
“You could hole up in the Dungeon today,” Chase suggested as though he was reading my mind.
That’s only one of the many reasons I love him. “I probably will after I go for the dress fitting.”
He raised one brow. “I thought you were going there this morning? I can’t believe you lied to me.” He sighed and shook his head.
“I wasn’t lying.” I tried to repair the damage.” I thought it might be more important to find Shakespeare. He knew about the prank, and came to Wanda’s cottage right after I found her dead. I went to look for him, but he wasn’t at his podium when the Main Gate opened.”
“I’ll have people keep an eye out for him. You think he was involved with Wanda’s murder?”
“I don’t know. I didn’t to begin with, but now with him disappearing . . . I guess it’s possible.”
“Okay. Just don’t worry about it. Pat has been playing Shakespeare here since the Village opened. He isn’t going to walk off the job. We’ll find him.”
“Thanks.” I managed a smile, but I didn’t have the same confidence he had. If Shakespeare had killed Wanda, he could be long gone by now.