Authors: Monica Miller
“Um… Not really, I have to finish filing these papers and sign some other things and I’m done.”
“Can I give you a lift? In like a… half an hour?” he asked with a grin and I stared at him for a few moments.
“Oh. Sure, yes, it would be really nice,” I said quickly and he gave me a smile and nodded.
“Okay. See ya,” he said.
I sighed and supported my head in my hands. This was going to be really difficult.
*
“Okay, so I’ve sort of met someone,” I said as I entered Rick’s room the next day.
He was sitting on his bed and looking at some football magazines or creating new schemes for the game. He raised his head and looked at me, rather surprised seeing me all dressed up.
“Who?”
“I met him at the office the other day… And he asked me out, and he’ll come pick me up in about… 10 minutes so could you please be nice?” I asked with a grin and Rick raised an eyebrow.
“You’re going on a date in jeans?” he asked as he checked me out. “And that shirt? Really? You don’t like him at all, right?”
“What’s wrong with my outfit? It’s… normal,” I said as I looked into his mirror. “I don’t look slutty nor…”
“Willing to date him, yeah,” he said and I sighed. “Did Nicholls like him?”
I hated he barely spoke about Matt and when he did he always used his last name with a disgusted expression on his face.
“No… He thinks he’s arrogant. He doesn’t even know him!” I complained and I noticed my brother’s jaw suddenly clenching. “What?”
“He’s just… Why won’t you just let me beat the crap out of him, Emma? He fucking deserves it!”
“I don’t… We shouldn’t talk about that, I wanted to tell you to be nice to Alec. Alex.”
“Alec or Alex? Do you even know his name?” Rick jokes and I rolled my eyes.
“Yeah, but Matt always…” I stopped when I noticed Rick’s serious expression and ran my hand through my hair. “Just be nice, okay?”
“Emma. Stop it, okay? Nicholls is dating Monica now. So stop it. You shouldn’t even see the guy!”
Just before I thought about saying anything, I was literally saved by the bell. I gave Rick a sweet smile and headed towards the door, Rick obviously following me like the protective brother he was.
“Hi, man, I’m Rick!” he said so politely before I had to chance to say something.
“Hi, Rick, I’m Alex,” he said with an elegant smile.
Man, he was indeed hot. And that wasn’t all, he had that attitude Matt used to have, that cockiness I’ve always been attracted to when Matt had that smirk on his face and…
Stop thinking about Matt!,
my mind practically yelled at me as I noticed Alex was wearing a black suit and he looked oh-so-good.
“Hey, Emma,” Alex saluted me with a cute smile as he turned to me.
“Hey. Um… Rick’s my brother,” I said awkwardly as Alex looked at me and Rick.
“Oh. Yeah, sure. Nice to meet you, man,” he said and he suddenly seemed to relax. “So you’re ready?”
“Yes,” I said as I looked at Rick who was standing looking more like my dad.
“I want you to get her back by 11,” Rick started and my eyes widened. “And take care of her, okay? Otherwise I…”
“Richard!” I whispered and Alex started laughing.
“Obviously, Rick, don’t worry,” he said as he shook his hand. “Your brother is nice. I also have a sister and, trust me I’d literally kill the guy who’d dare to hurt her. So I understand him,” he said as we reached to his car and he opened the door for me.
I nodded awkwardly and we didn’t talk much on the way to the restaurant and suddenly I felt I was dressed to casual, considering he was wearing a suit and he looked so elegant and comfortable at the same time. Matt uses to wear suits all the time too.
Starting again, Emma?
Sorry.
“I really love this restaurant,” he told me as he offered me his arm when we got out of the car. “It’s Italian, I hope you don’t mind?”
“Oh, no. It’s awesome.”
I felt rather uncomfortable than relaxed even though he started talking after the waiter came to get us the menus and he was pleasant and cute, but somehow my mind wondered back when I was dating Matt and the way he held my hand while laughing about practically everything and…
“You’re thinking about him, right?”
“Excuse me?”
“Mr. Arrogant,” Alex said with a serious expression.
Really? Could they
be
more alike?
“He’s not arrogant,” I said slightly bothered. Only
I
could say that Matt was an arrogant jerk. Because I knew that he wasn’t. It was part of his charm.
“But you’re thinking about him,” Alex insisted and I rolled my eyes.
“No, I’m not.”
“Look, if you don’t…” he paused and looked around the room and didn’t say anything for a few minutes. “It’s okay if you like him and… I just… need to know.”
“I don’t, okay? And I think it’s rather uncomfortable to ask me that about my boss.”
“The boss you were kissing in his office a few days ago?”
Matt was right. I didn’t know him and it was such a big mistake to date someone just to make Matt jealous. Because that’s what I was doing, right? That’s why I accepted, because Alex resembled Matt and it was like I got a second chance with someone like him. Just like Adele says in her song.
“I’m sorry. This is wrong!” Alex said and I nodded. “I’m so sorry, Emma. We started so wrong.”
“Yes, I’m sorry I know I’m…”
“Beautiful? Yes, that’s true,” he said and I felt my cheeks burning. “You know you’re so cute when you blush?” he said and I hated myself for blushing, and he started laughing.
The rest of the night went by pretty uneventful, we talked about a lot of different things and I noticed I had a lot in common with him, despite the fact that at some point he mentioned he’s addicted to soccer, and then he said Barcelona and I pictured Matt’s reaction if he ever found out that the guy I’m seeing likes Barcelona. I didn’t like Barcelona myself, since Rick and Matt convinced me along the years that Real Madrid is the best team.
We talked about his childhood, and I loved the way he talked about his sister and how protective he was about her and somehow it reminded me of Rick who stood beside me the last few months and tried to make everything better for me.
I found out he was from Florida and that he had studied there, and recently been offered the job at our company and since he recently lost his parents, he decided it would be good to have a new start.
Even though I was unsure about Alex at the beginning, now it felt like an amazing opportunity to move on. He was funny, really, really attractive and super smart and we also had things in common. And he wasn’t a fictional character, which made him even greater.
After spending almost three hours on dinner, we went to take a walk on the beach and we ate vanilla flavored ice cream and laughed about everything and nothing in particular and he held my hand in his and it felt good. It felt really good.
*
I left my pen down and remembered the time Matt and I used to get along so well, the way we laughed all the time and how he kissed me. I ran my hand through my hair and took a look at Matt, who was still concentrated at the paperwork in front of him, looking so hot and focused. Why would someone be allowed to be so good looking and such a jerk at the same time?
“Okay, what’s up?” he asked lifting up his head and looking right into my eyes.
“Nothing,” I said taking my pen back and trying to act like I’m focused too.
“You’re thinking about Alex?”
“No!” I replied fiercely. Is he stupid?
“So then you’re thinking, obviously, about me,” he joked and I opened my mouth to say something and I felt my cheeks burning. God, body language sucks! “Are you?”
“Um… No, I-“
“Emma…”
“I’m sorry, I was just…” I sighed and tried to get over this awkward tension created between us just in a few seconds.
My phone buzzed in my pocket and looked at it and noticed a text from Alex.
Lunch in 5?
I sighed and replied ‘yes’ and looked at Matt again, who was now looking at me.
“Emma, I’m sorry…” he started and I nodded.
“I know,” I assured him and he tried to smile.
“The fact is that… I knew you would’ve never forgiven me. And to be honest, I would never forgive myself either. So…”
“I would’ve. I would,” I whispered and he ran his hand through his black hair.
“Monica needed me back then, you know? It was really hard for her and I…”
“I needed you too,” I continued and he shook his head. “I need you. And you’re stupid, okay?”
“Look, Ems… I hate Mr. Arrogant, but somehow I’m sure he’s a better man than I am. Because… I love you, but yet again I’m dating Monica and I wouldn’t… I couldn’t even tell Monica I love her back, you know? And what did I do? I stupidly asked her to marry me without even thinking. I’m not good for you. Even if this fucking kills me. I can’t hurt you anymore, Emma, I’m sorry. I do think it’s best for me to be with Monica right now.”
“Yes, but I-“
Just when I opened my mouth to continue to humiliate myself and let him know everything I feel about him, we heard a knock on his door and seconds after, the door opened and there was Alex.
“Sorry to bother. I was looking for Emma and it seems I was right,” he said with a smirk and I forced myself to smile after I looked at Matt who seemed rather relieved than annoyed because Alex interrupted us.
“Hi, Alec,” Matt said with a wide smile, like we didn’t even talk about us loving each other just seconds ago.
“I won’t bother,” Alex said with a smirk as his jaw clenched.
“At least I’m funny,” I heard Matt whisper and I couldn’t stop myself from laughing.
“So, lunch Emma? I waited for you for like 10 minutes, but…”
“Sorry, I have no idea what time is,” Matt said. “Sure you can go, Ems.”
I nodded and grabbed my stuff and Alex took my hand in his and in that moment it felt just so wrong. To be leaving with another guy, and leaving Matt.
“Hey, Matthew, wanna join us to lunch?” Alex said just before we got to the door and my heart stopped as I looked at Matt’s surprised expression.
Oh, Alex was playing dirty! I couldn’t believe he still thought I had something with Matt after I specifically told him I had not. Every single part of me wished Matt would say no. But then again, we’re talking about Matt Nicholls.
“That is such a good idea!” he said with a big smile. “I’d love to.”
Oh, no. This is not happening. I frowned at Matt and he ignored me as he walked out first. Alex was still holding my hand as Matt walked beside me and that was just wrong. I couldn’t even pay attention to what Alex was saying because it felt wrong to be with someone else than Matt.
Yeah, but he is already dating someone else than you. And he doesn’t seem that bothered, right?
We went to the little restaurant down the corner where Matt and I used to go to lunch when we wouldn’t bother to order something or when we didn’t go and eat on the beach in the days when things weren’t too busy at the office.
Since I went out with Alex a few times before and I knew the way he acted around me, so it was weird to see he was all into PDA right now and it was really confusing. We did hold hands when we walked together or that kind of things, but now all his actions were annoying, and I was quite sure he was doing it because Matt was there. I have no idea why he keeps doing that, it’s like he intends to annoy Matt somehow and I don’t like that at all.
I loved going out with Alex, because he was a really great company and he was great, caring, funny and sweet, but when he started talking about Matt… It’s amazing how competitive the two of them could get and at some point they are so much alike.
But I can’t convince myself to start focusing on my relationship with Alex. It’s not quite a relationship, we’re just… casually dating I guess, nothing too serious, because I keep thinking about Matt. I always heard that you can definitely get over someone with or under someone
else
, but in this case… It’s so not working. Not that I’ve been or plan to be under Alex.
“So, Ems, whatcha think?” Matt asked with a smirk and I lost myself in his deep blue eyes. He raised an eyebrow and I shook my head to stop staring at him, because as he often said, that was rude. Plus my possibly current boyfriend was right next to me, annoyingly holding my hand.
“Um… Sorry, I wasn’t…”
“Paying attention, yeah, I noticed,” Alex said with a childish smile and he looked so innocent with an allure of maturity. “We were talking about the fact that you haven’t told me yet that you’re a Real Madrid fan, and Matt here said you’re disappointed of the fact that I’m a Barcelona fan, cause you think Madrid are better. So Matt was asking for your opinion.”
“Football? Really, Matthew?” I asked and he shrugged and started laughing as I ran a hand through my hair.
“You didn’t tell me you are into soccer,” Alex said with a smile as he caressed my cheek once more.
“Because I’m not. Not particularly. When Matt and I lived together it was almost impossible to do something else than watch their matches, especially when Rick was there and they yelled so loud at the screen it was impossible not to get… in the mood I guess.”
“So now it’s my fault!” Matt complained rolling his eyes. “You should just admit you have this huge crush on Xabi Alonso and Iker Casillas and that’s why you watched football with us.”
“That’s irrelevant,” I said and Matt laughed.
“Wait. You lived… together?” Alex asked looking at me then at Matt then at me again.
“Oh, yeah. For… about a year and a half… Or more,” Matt said with a smirk.
He really enjoyed that! I noticed Alex’s jaw clenching, but he tried to look all casual and okay with it, even though it was clear he was going to ask more about it later.
The rest of the meal went pretty much like that, Matt saying something and Alex disapproving of what he had said or the other way around, me in the middle trying to make everyone happy or just keeping myself busy with my salad, Alex acting so much like Matt and Matt acting so much like himself and it was so clearly why they couldn’t stand each other. It was like they were twins or… clones. Only that they didn’t look alike.