PeakExperience (20 page)

She was almost forty-one years old and living with so much
fear of failure, it colored almost everything she did. She laughed mirthlessly
at herself. And she accused Daniel of being the immature one. Another place
where she was wrong. If he asked her to show her work publicly she would have refused
and crawled back to the safety of her studio, perhaps choosing to be mad at him
for suggesting it. It was a no-win situation for him, and for her. He’d given
her a chance to change that, and so did Alice by offering Lena the opportunity
to close the show immediately.

Sitting in her apartment, Lena thought about gallery
visitors seeing her pictures and let those feelings pass through her. Then she
thought about the show closing and her work going back to the room in
Stockbridge. An unexpected wave of sadness hit her, and she knew her answer.

Possibility was better than fear.

She also needed to see Daniel. Immediately. Grabbing her
bag, she headed to the door, but stopped when she opened it to find him
standing there poised to knock.

“I need to talk to you,” he said and walked past her without
waiting for an invitation. He stopped in the middle of the living room. “I want
to tell you I’m sorry, but it wouldn’t be the complete truth. I’m not sorry for
what I did because I still believe you wouldn’t have made the leap on your
own.”

“Daniel, I—”

“Let me finish,” he said, running his hands through his
hair. She knew from living with him he did that when he was thinking and trying
to fix something. “I am sorry it hurt you as much as it did. You have to know
it wasn’t my intention. You mean so much to me, and your art means a lot to
you. I didn’t want the passion of the woman I love locked away—figuratively and
literally.”

By this point Lena was standing in front of him. “Daniel,
stop.”

“I can’t. Not if it means I’m going to lose you.”

“You’re not going to lose me. I love you.”

“Oh God, say that again.” He pulled her into his arms.

“I love you,” she said against his chest, then looked up and
brought his head to hers for a deep kiss. Earlier today she wondered if they
would ever share another. Knowing this was far from the end made the kiss much
sweeter.

“I need to be closer to you,” he said.

“How about in me?’’

“That works.”

Wrapped in each other, they stumbled to her room, shedding
clothes and tripping over each other along the way. By the time they got to her
bed they were naked. He covered her with his body and she ran her hands over
him, wanting to touch every inch as he touched her.

“Lena, you are so precious to me.”

“And with you I can live as I’ve ached to, be the woman I
want to be.” She needed to be connected to him and couldn’t bear to wait. She
reached over to her nightstand drawer and removed a condom and a familiar
bottle of lubrication. He smiled at her hungrily. “I bought this a few days
after we came back. Take me, Daniel. Take me the way only you ever have.”

He crushed her mouth in a bruising, passionate kiss, telling
her he was as hungry for her as she was for him. The knowledge sent a rush
through her. Her body was as ready as her heart.

As he rolled the condom on, she opened the lubricant and
poured some onto her hand then wrapped her fingers around his cock. He took the
bottle from her and dripped more of the slick liquid onto the bottom of her
pussy. She shivered as it slipped down to her ass. Grabbing a pillow his said,
“Lift up, my love,” and as she did he placed it under her hips. “I love seeing
you open for me. You’re beautiful.”

And she believed it, felt it deep in her heart.

He poured more lube on his fingers and slid them into her,
making certain her body would accept him. When he eased them out she bent her
knees to her chest to allow him to enter her. She gasped as her body adjusted
to the intrusion, but as she relaxed the pleasure grew.

“I never imagined how wonderful this could be,” she said.

“It only works with a great deal of trust.”

“And a great lover,” she said.

“Two great lovers.”

Nothing more than moans and cries of “oh yes” were possible
as he reached between them and teased her clitoris until they both came. The
intensity of her pleasure would have alarmed Lena a few weeks ago. Instead she
welcomed it. She found all that was missing from her life—and so very much
more.

She lay in his arms after, loving the size and strength of
him. “Well, this is not how I thought today would end. Does this mean you
forgive me for not telling you about the exhibit?”

“I understand why you did it. I’m not saying I wasn’t hurt
when it happened, because I was.”

“I know. Hell, I saw it, and I’m sorry.”

“Thank you. As hard as it was, I also know the truth is
without your push, I would have stayed in my nest for a long time. Possibly
forever. After Alice told me there were no critics, I started to relax and when
I think back on the day, I know it was more wonderful than not. I don’t want to
hide anymore.”

“Are you going to let the exhibit continue?”

“I am. I’ll call Alice later and let her know.”

He kissed her. “I’m glad. You deserve it.” Unexpectedly her
eyes started to tear. “Are you okay? Did I say something wrong?”

“No, just the opposite. I do deserve this. I’ve been living
a very restricted, controlled life and it hasn’t been working well for my
creativity. Or my heart,” she added giving him a kiss. “I don’t think I’m going
to jump into doing artistic work full time, but I think I can find a balance
like you have.”

“We can head out to Stockbridge for an occasional weekend
retreat to shoot pictures and create.”

“I’d like that, and I know my work at Crane and Fulton will
benefit from being more active as an artist. I don’t want to leave there,
though. It’s special to me.”

“I think you’ll be great at both,” he said and gave her a
quick kiss. “Besides, without it, we wouldn’t have had these few weeks. Just no
forgetting to take some time for fun.”

“That sounds wonderful. And so does being with you. I am
glad you came into my life, Daniel. You have brought me joy and love and,” she
caressed his chest, going down farther to stroke his semi-hard cock, “the best
sex of my life. I never knew I could enjoy myself in bed the way I have until
you came along.”

He moaned and kissed her. “It’s not unlike your art, you
know. I simply uncovered what was already there. You are the most passionate
woman I’ve known, in or out of bed. I love that you let me show you this side
of yourself.”

“Me too.”

“There’s one thing I have to set straight.”

He sounded very serious. “Okay. What’s that?”

“You cannot throw my age at me like a character flaw every
time we have a disagreement. I can’t change that. Yes, I have been around
twelve years less than you, but it doesn’t automatically discount everything I
say. I need you to accept me, all of me, age included.”

“You’re right.”

“Ooh, words every man longs to hear from a woman,” he said
with a teasing smile.

“I have used your age against you, but it’s not because I’m
discounting what you’re offering. It’s usually because I know you’re right, and
I need distance from the truth you’re forcing me to see.”

“I understand, but I still don’t want it used against me.”

“I won’t.”

“Thank you. Anything else I should know that we haven’t
discussed that’s important to you?”

“Yes,” she said.

“And what would that be?”

“I want you to make love to me again and kiss me breathless
the way you’ve done from the beginning.”

“It would be my pleasure,” he said.

“Mine too.” He lifted her in his arms and curled her to him for
a kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you too. I feel like I’ve loved you forever,” he
said.

“Then there is one more thing I want you to do for me.”

Daniel smiled. “What’s that?”

“Don’t ever stop.”

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