Owning Destiny (Forsaken Sinners MC Series Book 4) (5 page)

Letting out a sigh of my own, I look down at my feet. I have so many thoughts going through my head right now, but he’s right. Personal issues aside, my patients mean everything to me. It never mattered if I was sick or if there was a tragedy that struck close to home, I was always there for those that needed me.

But this time is different. I just can’t tell if it’s because this time my situation is worse or if it’s because of Mack.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see him step closer. “Rose?” Dr. Yorkshire questions.

Looking up into his eyes, I try to detach myself even further. If I’m going to do this—see Mack—I need to cut my thoughts and feelings off more than ever. I need to be hard at stone, tough as steel.

“I’ll sign off on his release papers and make sure everything is set for his release. But then I need to talk to Monica and leave for a while. I can’t explain it all right now, but I need some time away,” I say, then turn on my heel, heading down to Mack’s room. I don’t wait for Dr. Yorkshire to comment further or ask questions. I just want to get this over with.

Stopping in front of Mack’s door, I take in a deep breath. Yesterday I was looking forward to continuing his care and seeing him make even more progress. But today…I’m in a fog of numbness. I don’t know what’s going to happen when I walk through this door, but I guess it’s best to just get it over with. The faster I can sign off on his release and treatment, the faster I can talk to Monica and leave this place. And be far away from my brother.

Steeling myself, I hold my breath and open the door.

Catching Mack off guard, he swings his head around and looks at me first with concern, then anger.

“Where the fuck have you been?” he yells.

The breath I was holding whooshes out of me, but it’s not from surprise or even from fear. With that one sentence he was able to break through my numbness and make me just as angry as he seems to be―if not more.

“None of your goddamn business,” I say through gritted teeth as I walk over to the end of his bed where his file is hanging.

Grabbing it with angry movements, I flip to the last page, intending to just sign my name before leaving the room. I don’t even care what it says or suggests for his treatment, I only want to get away from him. This man turns me inside out, makes me feel everything. I’ve never met a person who makes me feel every emotion at once; fear, anger, lust, happiness, compassion, and so much more. It’s dizzying and annoying. I feel like a tornado has come crashing through my life, picking me up and spinning me around and around. And like a tornado, there will be nothing but mayhem and destruction in his wake.

I can’t handle any more destruction in my life. Everything I’ve been through, it’s enough to last two lifetimes.

Signing my name at the bottom of Mack’s chart, I don’t even bother to hang it back up again. Instead, I throw it down at his feet before turning on my heel to leave. I’m grateful for the fact that he can’t walk right now so he can’t stop me. He can yell and demand me to come back all he wants, but he can’t stop me from leaving. Nothing will.

“What the hell happened to you?” I don’t know if it’s a rhetorical question, but it doesn’t matter. I don’t stop or falter in my retreat.

“I never pegged you as the type to run scared. Guess I was wrong,” Mack says quietly, almost like he doesn’t intend for me to hear. But I do, and those words make me stop. They make me question everything that’s happened in the last few weeks and what I’m about to do now.

He’s right. I’ve never been the type of girl to run away from things and I wasn’t scared of much in my life. But my brother has always been the exception and probably always will be. With him around trying to interfere in my life, I’ll never truly be free. I’ll always be waiting for the next time he shows up, the next time he leaves me a cryptic message, or the next time he tries to hurt me.

Turning around to face Mack, I don’t let my face show how much his words affect me. They hurt and make me feel like I’m giving up, but if he only knew what was going on, he’d see that this is me
fighting
. This is me taking control and not letting Anthony win. I’m not running scared…I’m running to take back my life; any way I can.

“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” I seethe, unable to hide the anger I feel. But I can’t hold him completely responsible. The fact that I’m having to run because of my brother pisses me off too, both at myself and at him.

“Maybe not, but let me tell you what I
do
know,” he shoots back. “I know that within the last month you have never once been late for an appointment you’ve set with me for treatment. I know that within the last month you have never once seemed weak or afraid.
Until today
.”

I can literally feel the fuse he lit within me with his words and can only hold my breath and wait till the fuse burns all the way down to the bomb. I’m about to explode in three…two…one.

“You don’t fucking know me. You don’t know anything about what’s going on or what I’m feeling! You think I’m scared? Maybe I am, but that’s none of your fucking business,” I yell, not even caring if the other patients, doctors, or nurses hear me. I’ve never been this mad before at anyone in my whole life.

“Then fucking tell me!” Mack yells back.

Just then, the door to the room opens and in walks Dr. Yorkshire. “Everything all right in here?” he questions, looking back and forth between Mack and I with a confused, yet demanding expression.

Taking a deep breath, I lie. “Yes. I was just explaining to Mr. DeVin that if he continues to work hard, he’ll be walking in no time.”

There’s no need to get into what is really going on. Not with Dr. Yorkshire, anyway. It’s none of his business and he wouldn’t understand. Mack and I have grown into more than a nurse/patient role, though I’m not sure exactly what it is. We’re not friends, that’s for sure. But maybe in-between? I don’t know how to explain it. But that doesn’t mean he knows what he’s talking about where I’m concerned, or even has a say in what I do.

“Good. That’s good,” Dr. Yorkshire says, moving closer to Mack’s bed. “Now that Nurse Rose has signed off on your release and treatment plan, here is a list of home care nurses and physical therapists. Take a look and let me know if you need help contacting one to hire for the rest of your recovery.”

I move backwards toward the door, intending to leave while Mack is distracted.

“That won’t be necessary, Doc. I’ve already hired someone. She’s perfect for both jobs,” Mack answers, and even though I’m a little curious who it is, I don’t stop. I
need
to get out of here.

“Oh, that’s great news, Mr. DeVin. Who is it you chose to manage your care?”

“Nurse Rose.”

Chapter Five

Mack

I caught her off guard.
Shit
, I caught myself off guard with that statement. What the hell was I thinking saying she was going to be my live-in nurse? I don’t even know if she does that shit or if it’s even a good idea. But fuck me, I need her to say yes. I need her to be the one to finish my care and treatment.

Dr. Yorkshire looks dumbfounded and then doubtful. I guess I’m not the only one who isn’t sure if Rose will agree.

“I’ll leave you two to hash out the details then,” he says as he turns around to face Rose, who is frozen in front of the door, facing away from us. “Nurse Rose, please stop by my office before you speak with Monica.”

Rose doesn’t reply, but she nods like she’s on auto-pilot. Dr. Yorkshire sidesteps her and walks out the door after a brief look at Rose. From where I’m at, I can only see half his face, but I can tell I don’t like the look he gives her, no matter how short it is. It speaks volumes. It says, “Don’t do it,” and “He’s not worth it.”

I want to reach into my side table, pull Betty out, and point it at his fucking head. Tell him that he don’t know me or what my intentions are. That he has no goddamn right to exert his opinion on Rose and what he thinks she should do. But I won’t. Not because it’s a bad idea that would most likely get me arrested, but because I don’t think Rose would like it much.

Goddamn it!
When did I start worrying about what bitches think?

The door closes and I wait for the storm to hit. If being around Rose every day for the past month has taught me anything, it’s that she’s going to come at me with guns blazin’. She’ll yell and puff about me assuming she’d take the job or some shit like that. It’s just a matter of time before it happens.

“I’m not going with you,” Rose says calmly, with her back still turned to me. I’m surprised I didn’t get more out of her than that, but it’s not going to stop me.

“Yes, you are,” I counter, trying to sound confident. “Look, I don’t know what’s going on with you, but at least hear me out.” I need to be able to talk her into this. Not only because I don’t think anyone else could treat me the way she can and I don’t want to bring anyone else into the clubhouse, but because I need
her
. I barely understand it myself, but it’s the truth. Maybe it’s because she’s hot as fuck and I’m not done with her yet, or maybe it’s the fact that she stands her ground with me. She doesn’t back down and I like that—respect it even. I just hope that once she hears what I have to offer she’ll agree.

“I don’t have time for this shit. I need to talk to Monica so I can get the hell out of here,” Rose says but she doesn’t make a move to leave. Her words say one thing but her body language says something completely different.

“Just give me five minutes. Please. I promise if you don’t like what I have to offer, I won’t stop you from leaving,” I say. There’s not much I could really do about her leaving. But you can bet your ass I’d raise some hell.

Letting out a long sigh, she finally turns around and gives me her eyes. It’s then I notice how tired she looks. When she came in before, I knew something was wrong, but now looking at her, she almost looks sick.

Rose walks over to the chair that sits beside my bed and practically falls into it, like she could no longer hold herself up. “You have five minutes and then I’m leaving.”

A slow grin starts taking over my face, which makes Rose scowl. “Just because I’m hearing you out doesn’t mean I’m going to agree to whatever bullshit offer you have for me.”

There’s that sass and mouth I’ve been looking forward to all day. If she thought her words and attitude would have the smile slipping off my face in defeat, she was wrong.

Laughing to lighten the mood a little, I hold my hands up like I’m surrendering to her, but it’s the exact opposite. I’m just going to fight that much harder to get what I want. And what I want is her.

“All right, babe. I hear ya loud and clear. I got five minutes to plead my case and then I’ll be helpless and at your mercy,” I say with a wink, which gets me a small smile in return, though she tries to hide it.

“You’re now down to four minutes,” she says, leaving the sentence sounding hard, but I would bet all my chips that she’s not going anywhere. At least not until I’m done putting it all on the table.

Turning my body as best I can so I’m facing her head on, I jump right in. “When I was shot, I thought my life had ended. And then when I woke up here in the hospital, I had hope for about three seconds before the doctor told me that I may never walk again. I was angry, depressed, and at times I just wanted to let go of everything and be done with it. I hated what my life had turned into.”

I didn’t really know how I was going to start this conversation or get her to understand where I was coming from, but I never thought it’d be this. I can’t believe I even spoke those words out loud. Yes, it’s all the truth, but to admit that to
anyone
…let’s just say I’m probably more surprised by what I just said than she might be.

“The doctors came and went, they shoved pills down my throat and medicine in my IV, and gave me looks of pity. They encouraged me, but I could tell they never thought in a million years that I’d get feeling back in my legs, let alone walk again. No one thought I’d get better…no one but
you
.”

I can tell she wants to protest, but I hold my hands up, stopping her before she can say anything. “You lit a fire under my ass, Rose.
You
are the one who started this, and I need
you
to be the one to finish it.” It may not be worded that way, but I’m not going to give her a choice. She
will
be the one to finish my therapy and get me strong again.
She
will be the reason I walk again. Yeah, I’ll have a huge part in it too, but I wouldn’t even be here, having some feeling back in my limbs, without her.

“You can’t just expect me to drop everything to cater to your every demand. Plus, I can’t afford to not work for a few weeks. Shit, it could take months before you’re back on your feet,” Rose says, but it’s with little venom. She’s close to caving. We both know it. I just have to close the deal.

“I’m not expecting you to drop everything, Rose. Or to do this for free. I will make it worth your while. You’ll be highly compensated. I’ll pay you double what you make here,” I tell her, setting the bait. “And you won’t be catering to my every demand. I’ll be the one catering to yours.”

She’s thoughtful for a few moments before she starts laughing. Even though I’m confused as to where her sense of humor is coming from, I love seeing her like this, even if it’s at my expense.

It takes her a little while, but she finally settles down enough to talk. “I don’t think you could afford my current salary, let alone double it.” Again, she laughs. This time though, it’s a cruel laugh, and I know exactly what she finds so hilarious. Me.

It pisses me off that she doesn’t think I can afford to employ her and the fact that she’s laughing makes me want to breathe fire, but I take a few deep breaths, trying to calm down. I don’t want to say anything in the heat of the moment that will break this deal for me.

I wait until she’s done laughing and my anger is down to a manageable level. I’m still raging on this inside, feeling like she unmanned me, but I think I’ll be able to get what I need to say across without sounding like an insane asshole. Mostly.

“Since you don’t think I can afford your salary, how about I show you just what I can afford by
tripling
it? I’ll pay you three times what you make here, plus pay for everything else you need while working with me: housing, food, basic essentials, and anything else your heart desires,” I say, ending with a smirk when I see her mouth drop open with the amount of money we’re talking about here. I have no idea what she makes, but I know I can afford her, even if I have to quadruple her pay.

All the years being president of my club, and all the business we’ve had, I never had much to spend my money on until recently. I’m not hurting in the cash department one bit, and still won’t be even after this transaction.

Minutes later, she’s still speechless. “So what do you say, Rose? Will you be my live-in nurse for the duration of my recovery?”

Closing her mouth, she seems to actually ponder what I’ve offered, like it still might not be enough. But then she shakes her head, crosses her arms, and levels me with a look that is all business. “I’ll agree to be your nurse. I’ll continue your therapy and make sure you are well on your road to recovery, but, I have a few stipulations. If you can’t accept those, then no deal.”

Of course she does. But what she doesn’t know is that I’d agree to pretty much anything if it means she’ll take me on as her patient full-time. I’ll have her full attention, her hands on me every day, and I won’t have to share her with anyone else. Fuck yeah I’ll agree to whatever she says.

I nod, letting her know to go on with her demands.

“First and foremost, I want my own living quarters. I don’t know where you live exactly, whether it be at your clubhouse or home, but I want my own place. I want it stocked with everything I would need; fridge, microwave, TV, bed, and a couch. That way if I don’t want to, I don’t have to leave my room for anything,” she says, then waits for me to answer.

“Done. What else?”

“I want to be able to come and go as I please. When I’m not doing something that isn’t a part of your therapy, I want to be able to leave.”

“I’ll agree to that, but you’ll have to take one of the brothers with. I don’t know who will be watching, but if someone thinks they can hurt the club by hurting you, I need to make sure you’re protected. I won’t budge on this,” I say without mercy, hoping she doesn’t argue on this and that it won’t break the deal for her. But I can’t have her going off and getting kidnapped on my watch. I’d never forgive myself if she was hurt because of her affiliation with me or my club.

I thought it’d take a few minutes for her to decide on that one, or that she’d argue, but she doesn’t. Instead, she answers right away. “Fine. But they will keep their distance, only interfering if they have to.”

As shocked as I am, I don’t waste a minute nodding my head, afraid she’ll change her mind. “Done. Anything else you want?” I ask, wondering how many more demands she’ll have, but so far, she hasn’t thrown anything at me that I can’t or won’t do.

“Just a few more things, Mr. DeVin,” she says with a genuine smile. “You may be my employer, but you will do what I say. If it has something to do with your treatment or even something that could affect your prognosis in anyway, you have listen to me. I won’t have you jeopardizing all the hard work we both put into your recovery by doing something that will hinder your healing. This is a deal breaker for me, Mack.”

I can tell she’s serious, and even though it might be hard for me, I’ll agree. “Fine. I’ll be your little lapdog. If it’s something to do with my treatment, I’ll do whatever you say. You’re the boss on that front. But outside of all of that, you need to understand that this is my club, and you will do as I say. Do you understand?” I ask with a demanding tone. My controlling nature has taken over.

“Fine.”

And when I think she’s not going to make any more demands, she adds, “And lastly, you aren’t paying me triple my salary. I’ll do it for a weekly base rate of what I’m currently making, plus all the extras you mentioned before.”

Smiling, I say, “We’ll see.” No way in hell am I going to pay her less than what I offered. Even if she doesn’t want that much, I’ll keep my word. So wanted or not, she’s about to get a huge pay increase and there’s no way she can stop me or give it back.

Shaking her head like she thinks I’m joking, I just let her believe that. Standing, she heads for the door. “We have a deal, Mr. DeVin, and you have a new nurse.”

I’m so fucking happy I want to jump out of this bed and do a happy dance, but I don’t. Half because I can’t, but mostly because I don’t want to make a fool of myself in front of Rose.

“Glad we could come to an understanding,
Nurse Rose
. I’m getting released within the hour. Leave me your contact details and I’ll have one of my brothers meet you at your place to escort you to the clubhouse. You can stop and pick anything up that you need on the way. I’ll make sure he has the money to pay for whatever you want,” I say, finalizing the deal. I can’t wait to get out of here and back to my own room…sleep in my own bed. But now, I’ll know my sexy little nurse is just down the hall from me.

“I have a meeting to get to, but I’ll be sure to stop by with my cell phone number and address before you leave,” she says, then opens the door to leave, but I stop her.

“Oh, and one more thing. I’ll need your bank account info so I can set everything up to send your payments to you. Unless you’d rather have cash?” I ask, but hope she’ll want it to go into her account. That way I can deposit the full amount I want without her knowing right away.

“I’ll get you my account information,” she says right before she walks out the door.