Out Of The Friend Zone (18 page)

"Um, how about you be here, but in the other room, just in case I need some reinforcement or something. Does that sound too wimpy?"

"If it's going to get you to talk to him again, I see nothing wrong with it." Nyla told her. "So, pick up the phone and get him over here."

"Right now?" Brynn asked, startled.

"There's no time like the present. When were you thinking of doing it?"

"I don't know, like next month or something, when the wounds aren't so fresh?"

"Nice try, but you've had two weeks to deal with this already," Nyla pointed out." Get over to the phone and call him right now!"

"You sound like a schoolmarm."

Nyla pointed to the phone with a steady glare.

Brynn rolled her eyes but did as ordered. She punched in the first 6 numbers before hanging up the phone. She looked over to Nyla, who was giving her the look of death, then reached for the phone again.

As she entered the last number, Brynn could feel her heart beating as if it was going to thump out of her chest. Her mouth got dry as she listened to the phone ringing through to the other end.

"Brynn?" A deep voice asked through the phone when the ringing stopped.

"Yeah, it's me. Got to love caller ID," she tried to joke, but it came out flat.

"How are you?" Chandler asked quietly.

"Well, that depends on how you look at everything that's happened over the past two weeks." Brynn said, and squinted her eyes closed. She rubbed her hand over her forehead before going on. "Listen, the reason I'm calling is that Nyla thinks you and I need to talk some things out, and she won't leave me alone until we talk, so I was wondering if you had some free time-"

"I'll be right over!" Chandler said, cutting Brynn off before she had a chance to finish, so thankful for this opportunity. He wanted to get there before she changed her mind. Within seconds there was a knock at the back door.

As she opened the door and saw Chandler for the first time in two weeks, Brynn's stomach fluttered. Although he was still as gorgeous as ever, Brynn could tell the past couple of weeks had been rough on him. His eyes looked darker, like he hadn't been sleeping well, and he hadn't shaved in a few days either. His dark, wavy hair looked like it was growing a little out of control.

"Hi," Brynn said.

"Hi," Chandler replied, feeling as if his breath had been stolen from him. "I am so glad you called."

"Well, don't get too excited yet. I'm not exactly thrilled about this, but Nyla thinks it's only fair for me to hear your side of the story," Brynn told him, trying to push her emotions deep inside her so that he couldn't see the effect he was having on her just by standing in front of her. "Let's sit on the deck and talk."

Chandler backed up, so that Brynn could walk out the door. He felt that he needed to give her plenty of space, so that she didn't build her guard up even more than it already was. Brynn sat at the table and folded her hands in her lap, looking down as if she was afraid to look Chandler in the eyes.

Chandler took the seat directly across the table from her, again choosing to give her the space she needed. He did this, even though he wanted the seat closest to her, so that he could take her in his arms, and tell her everything was going to be alright.

"So..." Brynn said.

"Brynn, I don't even know where to start. That night we spent together was the most perfect night. I was so happy to have you in my arms, to hold you and to love you. I have been so lost without you."

"Then what happened? If you were so happy, why did you hurt me? I poured my heart out to you, told you I loved you, and all you could say was 'I love you too, Brooklyn'? What kind of shit is that? Do you know how that made me feel?"

Despite her determination not to, Brynn started to cry.

Chandler wanted to cry too. "I'm so sorry. I fell asleep right after we made love that morning. You wore me out, and you were putting me to sleep when you ran your hands over my chest. I was out. I didn't hear anything you said to me. I was lost in a dream so deep that it seemed real," Chandler tried to explain.

"You know, you're making things worse here. You were lost in a dream that seemed so real that it had you saying 'I love you too Brooklyn'? Yeah, not exactly what I want to hear about after we had just had sex, and after I told you how I felt about you."

"After we made love," Chandler mumbled.

"No, it's pretty obvious that it was only sex to you. We fucked, you got what you wanted," Brynn said, her voice harsh, trying to hurt him.

Chandler shook his head. "How can you say that?"He reached across the table and tried to grab Brynn's hand, but she jerked it away from him. "Brynn, we made beautiful love that night and the next morning. It wasn't just sex, and it sure as hell wasn't a quick fuck."

She crossed her arms over her chest and looked away.

"I love you, Brynn. I know you don't believe me right now, but give me another chance and I'll prove it to you," Chandler pleaded.

"Well, at least you got the name right this time," Brynn said sarcastically. She saw the hurt in his eyes when she said that, but after what she had been through over the past fourteen days, she wasn't sorry for it.

"As I started to explain to you before, I was asleep when you were talking to me. I had the most amazing dream, and even though it wasn't the best time to have the dream, I'm glad I did. I feel a lot more at peace now," Chandler said, and then explained his dream to her. Brynn listened without looking at him.

"So after she gave me her blessing to move on with you, she told me that she loved me, and that must be where I told her I loved her too. It was like it was our chance to say goodbye to each other. We never had that chance, Brynn." Chandler dashed away the tears that threatened to fall. "She was taken from me without any closure, and I feel like I finally got that closure in the dream that morning. I wasn't trying to hurt you, and if anything, I think that dream would have made things better between us. Yes, it would have been ideal to have the dream some other time, but I can't control what I dream about. I didn't even know I had said it until Nyla told me what had happened."

Brynn sighed. Chandler longed to reach for her, but he knew better than to try. "I didn't know that you told me you loved me. I had no clue what had you so upset that you just started yelling at me and ran out of my house. You have to know that I would never knowingly hurt you Brynn, you mean too much to me."

"I don't know anything anymore," Brynn said, shifting her eyes to the ground. She didn't know whether she should believe him, and if she did believe him, then should she be angry that he was dreaming about his first wife after they had just slept together, even though she was in the dream too? Brynn got up from the table and walked to the house, not saying a word to Chandler.

"Brynn?"

His voice was forlorn, pleading. She didn't look back, just walked inside and shut the door. Chandler put his head in his hands, worried that Brynn would never forgive him. He had felt a little encouragement when she had called him over, and it gave him some hope that things would work out between them. But now, after seeing Brynn walk into her house, not saying a word to him, he wasn't so sure. The only thing he was sure of was that he wasn't going to give up on her.

He got up and went back to his house, trying to come up with some sort of plan to get Brynn to forgive him. If only he could get a second chance, he'd make sure that he showed her every single day just how much he loved her.

"Well?" Nyla asked when Brynn came back inside.

"I don't know. Before I talked to him, I was so angry, and I didn't want anything to do with him. Now I am so confused, I couldn't tell you what is going through my head," Brynn told her, still a slight daze.

"Well, why don't you try to tell me what you're thinking?"

"Okay, maybe I blew things a little out of proportion, and he had no idea what I was telling him. I thought that he was awake when I was talking to him. And I am so happy for him to feel like he finally has some closure with Brooklyn, but the fact is that he was dreaming of her right after we made love. Isn't there something wrong with that?"

"Brynn, you know that you can't control what you dream about," Nyla pointed out to her.

"I know, but wouldn't that suggest that there was something wrong, that he was dreaming about Brooklyn just after we made love? I mean, something wrong in his subconscious?"

"Or maybe it was his subconscious telling him that something was finally right," Nyla suggested. "Besides, it wasn't just Brooklyn in that dream. You were in it too."

Brynn nodded. "I guess so. How do I know though?"

"I don't know the answer to that. I think you just need to give it time to figure out. Besides, you know how many times I dream about Josh Duhamel after I have sex with Zaiden? Hell, do you know how much Josh Duhamel enters my mind, not even just in dreams?"

Brynn couldn't help but grin. "I can probably imagine."

"But it doesn't mean anything. It doesn't lessen my feelings for Zaiden at all. It's just a distant fantasy," Nyla reasoned.

"But I don't want him to fantasize about his dead wife! I feel like I'll forever live in her shadow."

Nyla threw up her hands. "It's not like it was a sex dream that included his dead wife, so I doubt it was a fantasy. I was just pointing that out to you, to try to tell you that even though I think of the Vegas hottie, my real life hottie doesn't mean any less to me."

"I don't' know..."

Nyla was openly frustrated now."Why do you feel like you'll forever live in her shadow? Chandler is moving on with his life, and that means putting Brooklyn in his past. How many times has he told you that he's ready to do that for you?"

"Yeah, he's ready to put her in the past, but then he goes and had a dream about her," Brynn said.

"A dream about
closure
," Nyla replied. "Honey, it's time to get over this. Either you're going to forgive him or you're not, but it's time to stop dwelling on this!" Nyla gathered her purse and keys. "I have to go now. You need to work this out for yourself."

"I know. I'm sorry that I keep bothering you with this. Thank you for all your help." She gave Nyla a hug, then went to lie down on the couch to try to sort her mind out. There were so many questions floating through her head, and she was beyond confused. Was her love for Chandler strong enough to pull her through this?

A
fter their talk, Brynn was slowly starting to warm up to Chandler again. Now, instead of completely ignoring him when she saw him outside, Brynn smiled and waved politely, then went on with her business. Chandler was confused by her actions at first, but soon he figured two things out. One, that Brynn had too much pride to come out and say she was sorry, or that she forgave Chandler, and two, that she was coming around and he'd have her back soon.

Brynn knew she was making the situation worse than it had to be, but she didn't know what to do to rectify it. She couldn't just come out and tell him she forgave him and she wanted to get back together. She was going to wait for him to make the first move. After all, it was his fault that they were in this situation to begin with. She just hoped he would do something soon. Brynn missed him more than she cared to admit.

Nyla had tried to get Brynn to suck it up, and make the move to get back with Chandler, but Brynn just couldn't do it. "Besides," Brynn told Nyla, "I made the first move by calling him over here to explain what happened that night. Shouldn't the ball be in his court now?"

Nyla threw up her hands in frustration. "You two are both stubborn. He thinks you should make the first move because you were the one pissed, and you think he should do it because you already made a so-called first move? I give up. I have wasted too much time on your relationship, and not enough on my own. You sit here with your stubborn pride and be miserable, while I go home and have crazy, wild sex with my boyfriend. Hope that doesn't leave you with too many mental images while you sit here, all alone!"

Brynn glared at Nyla as she walked out. She felt bad that she had put Nyla in the middle of the Chandler/Brynn saga, but Nyla was her best friend. If she couldn't talk to her about this, then who could she talk to? Brynn was always there for Nyla, now she was just returning the favor.