One Swinging Summer (14 page)

"It's my favorite," was my lame reply.

"I can see why."

"Stay with me tonight." He said after a few seconds.

I thought about it. It felt good, dancing with him. I could easily fall back into our weekend routine. I thought about how much fun we had been having, and how this last week had been without him. I realized that I wasn't sure what I wanted yet out of this relationship. Was I looking for forever? If so, I don't think he is it. He is fun. He has been my partner in crime, and had opened me up to a playful, erotic world that I hadn't known was there. But I don't see me settling down with him and having two point five kids and a dog.

I trusted him. With my life, with our secrets, and with my body. But not with my heart. So, if I can't give him my heart, but I don't want to walk away from him just yet, what does that leave?

It leaves more of the same. Fun, openness to new experiences, friendship, easy company, and, well, the saying stuck in my head- my partner in crime. The male counterpart to myself. That's why I enjoyed him so much, he was me, but in a man's body. Me right now anyway. The me that needed this lighthearted relationship we had going on. No seriousness, no figuring out the bills together, no 'where is this going?' talks. Just pure, innocent, although very adult, no strings attached, no feelings involved enjoyment of life and each other.

So, should I go home with him tonight? I don't think so. I think I need some space, to build some walls. So far, everything had evolved naturally. Very quickly, but naturally. I was open to whatever happened, but I'm not now. Now I know what I wanted. I wanted to use him. Not in a bad, evil way, but still. Knowing now that I needed to keep my heart off-limits, but still open to the rest of it. He was healing me, in a way. He was showing me a fabulous, carefree, joyful part of myself that I knew later I would look back on and treasure.

Even if we crashed and burned later, I wasn't counting on a long term relationship anyway. Years from now, when I was married, dealing with husbands, kids, dogs and bills, I would have this time in my memories. Bars, dancing, freedom, where corsets were the norm and riding naked in a convertible would bring a secret thrill to my middle aged or older self.

I was wise enough to know that once something changes, there was a distinct possibility that everything would change soon after. So I had to be prepared that walling off my heart would naturally change the way we are together, but I hoped it would take awhile.

So, how do I answer Caleb's question?

"No, I'm not going home with you tonight, I'm not ready. I'm not saying no forever though, just this weekend. I really need to work tomorrow, and If I go home with you I know I won't. But I would like to ask you a favor."

"Anything."

I laughed. "Oh, no. Don't say that until you hear it. It is a doozy."

"OK then, shoot. What is it."

"Hear me out, OK. Don't answer in the middle. Let me get it all out, take a minute to think and then answer, alright?"

"Alright."

I paused a minute, searching uncomfortably for the words. "Next weekend is my birthday. Michael and Kate have mentioned that next weekend is 'black and white nighty' night at the other club. I am really curious about that place, and even though they are friends of mine, I don't want to walk in there alone, or just with them. You are the only person in this whole world that I could see myself walking into a club like that with. I was wondering if you would go with me, and then I'd go home with you afterwards, next Friday. If it sucks and reminds us of bad 70's porn or an old person's nudist colony or something, I'd need someone to make fun of them with. If instead, it is kind of cool or really hot, I'd need someone beside me that is safe to be with, ya know? Like a bodyguard or something, I don't want to be fresh meat in that place. I mean I'm planning on staying fully dressed, that's why nightie night is perfect. I could be dressed but still undressed. That sounds weird, I know, and I know I am rambling, but this isn't anything I'm used to asking, so... Would you go there with me?"

I could feel him thinking. My heart was going crazy even at the thought that he would say yes, oh what was I getting myself into? And if he said no? Said that I was a freak or something? I just wanted to see what the fuss was all about. I was pretty open minded, sexually. I liked watching porn and enjoyed the occasional buzzing, battery operated toy, but this was different. This was public, kind of. This was the possibility of porn looking back at you while you watched them. Or maybe not. Kate said guys had to be dressed in the common areas.

"Hey, you OK?" I heard Caleb ask.

"Sorry, I was already mentally freaking out that I had even asked. What do they do in there?"

He laughed at me. "I don't know. I've never been. Never really thought about it. But if you want to know, to see, then yes I will go with you. Honestly, I can't think of anyone else that I would go with either, but with you, I think it would be fun."

"Really? Yes?'

"Really. Yes. Now what?"

"Hell if I know."

CHAPTER 17
THAT OTHER CLUB

What does one look for in a nightgown for a first time visit to a swinger's club? 'An after hours club,' I corrected myself mentally. 'Yeah, that sounds less creepy.' So, what does one look for in a nightgown meant for an after hours club?

Long, yes, definitely long. I didn't want to risk bending over and showing more than I had intended to. Plus, it needed to be either black or white, according the the title 'Black and White Nightie Night.'

When I had left Caleb Friday night after he agreed to go with me, I had headed back to Kate's table, and said nervously, "So, next Friday...Is the offer to join you at that other club still open?"

"Of course. Does this mean your coming with us? Tonight?"

"No, I said next Friday. I think I need a week to prepare myself. Plus, next week is my birthday. If you can't do weirdly wild stuff on your birthday, when can you?"

"Oh, OK. Next Friday is Black and White Nightie Night so just throw a black or a white nightgown in the car, you can change there at the club. That way you aren't walking through parking lots in your nightgown. Is it just you? How did dancing with Caleb go?"

"Good. I asked him to go with me. I figure if this relationship's days are numbered anyway, I might as well take advantage of him, right? We can break up next weekend, after I've seen the inside of that bar. I'm curious as hell."

So, here I was days later, shopping for a nightgown. As I flipped through the racks I dismissed nightie after nightie. Too short, too lacy, too see through. This is harder than I thought. It was my third store. Everything looked so...naked.

After the first two stores I gave up on the normal places you would buy a nightgown for the bedroom. Victoria's Secret was all about Pj's, panties and bras. They had the occasional short nightie, but not what I was looking for. And Fredericks was a bust too. Those were normally my favorites, but I needed something different this time. The problem was that I didn't know what.

There was this stripper store that I sometimes shopped at. It had everything from costumes, to bikinis, to those high-heeled shoes with the clear stripper platforms on the bottom. I had bought a couple of corsets there and thought maybe that was the kind of store I needed.

I took a small handful of hangers into the dressing room. There was one white one that I kind of liked. It looked almost vintage. Lacy at the neckline, and at the bottom, but everything in the middle was solid. It gave a hint of see through, and had a side slit up the leg. The white fabric was a little thin. I thought of what might happen if it got wet. We've all seen white bathing suits that should never be worn in actual water. It was a maybe. The other ones I went through quickly, no, no and no. I had one black one left to try.

I think I had found my nightie. It was black, long, and the fabric was too thick to see through. It was silky and clingy, but in all the right places. The top was a halter style, it tied behind my neck and behind my back. From the front the only hint at naughty was the deep, plunging neckline. From the back, you could see the bow tied behind my neck, the bow where the bra strap would be, and then the skirt started low on my hips and fell all the way to the floor, so there was a lot of skin bared back there. To add to the sexiness, the skirt was slit on both sides, all the way up to the hip.

Oh yeah, I like that. I twisted this way and that in the mirror, bending over, jumping up, making sure nothing fell out, rode up, or otherwise became embarrassing. Classy, dramatic, fully covered, and sexy as hell. I'd seen dresses like this on the red carpet, only this one was a nightie. Perfect.

I looked my reflection in the eyes, 'Are you sure? Are you ready for this?' I grinned back at myself in response, 'Oh yeah. They are just people, right? Dancing in nighties?' I guess I'll find out.

I found myself standing in front of a different full length mirror, this time with Kate beside me, inside the bathroom of the after hours club. And this time, I didn't feel nearly as confident. "This thing needs a bra." I nervously told Kate, while I pulled and tugged at the top of the gown.

"What? Stop it, you look beautiful."

"And panty hose, and maybe a robe. What was I thinking?"

"Look at me," Kate demanded. I complied.

"You are gorgeous, the gown is gorgeous. You are fully covered. Minus the hip-high slits on both sides I can easily imagine you wearing something very similar to this to the normal club. You are just nervous. Don't be. There isn't any reason to be, I promise. The guys are waiting just outside. I am here too. Nothing happens that you don't want to happen. You can leave whenever you want. It is all just for fun. Fun, not torture. Now, stop freaking out and tie this." She said as she turned around, presenting me with the back of her nightie, with two ribbons hanging down.

She looked great. Her nightie was also black but shorter, knee length. It had spaghetti straps, feathers that pouffed around the neckline and around the hem, and the back laced up like a loose corset. It was this she needed tied.

"Come on," she said when she was tied. "The longer you stay in here, the weirder your mind gets." She took my hand and led me out. We were in the club, technically, but not all the way. So far it was just like she had said before midnight, at the other club, when she was telling us what to expect.

The parking lot is huge, but it was only half full when we got here. She said most people start arriving after midnight, and the lot would probably be full when we left. The building was rectangular, and a small sign out front just stated, "That Other Club, Private, Members Only."

"It really is named 'That Other Club?' I giggled. I had never thought to ask. The four of us- Caleb, myself, Kate and Michael, had all left together just before midnight, and we followed them here. It was only a few miles away, but I had never noticed it before. It had no windows, which is normal for any bar. And the front door was solid as well. No chance of anyone peeking inside.

Even if they could peek, you couldn't see anything. When we walked in the door there was a reception area, like in a doctor's office. There was a lady sitting on the other side of a sliding glass window, which was left open. We paid her the cover charge, and Kate directed me to the ladies room to change. They guys said they would wait for us before going farther.

Kate and I stepped out of the bathroom and the guys stopped their conversation mid-word. Caleb let out a wolf whistle, and Michael just said, "Damn." I smiled my thank you to Caleb, took his arm, and we followed Michael and Kate inside the next set of doors.

In here was the common bar area. We went to the bar first, to pick up cups and ice. It was bring your own liquor, but they had a little bar area stocked with cups, ice, and drink mixes like Coke and 7-UP. They also had food available, pizza, nachos, sub sandwiches. There was a guy behind the bar to take food orders and hand out cups and such. Kate introduced us. He is the husband to the lady who took our money. Kate said they own the place. He and Caleb shook hands, Michael said hi, and we all wondered off to find a table.

I leaned into Caleb and asked if I was the only one reminded of an elementary school roller-rink. He nodded and said, "The resemblance is eerie. The music, the lights flashing, the snack bar. I expect someone to announce a couple's skate any second." I laughed at that, and relaxed greatly.

The 'skate area' consisted of tables arranged in a large 'U' formation surrounding a dance floor, with a raised stage at the far end. The stage looked like it could accommodate a live band, but there wasn't one right now. At one side of the stage was a large glass booth back-lit with a spot light. The glass panel was a milky white and you couldn't see through. Kate said that was where you could dance behind the glass while lit from behind, so only your shadow could be seen. The center of the stage, about where the drummer would sit, was a stripper pole and on the other side of the stage, opposite the shadow dancing booth was a DJ booth.

The lights were down low, and the strobe lights and colored spot lights were spinning. Oddly enough, the same song was playing right now as had been playing at the original club when we left. It wasn't quite as loud in here though, you could actually have a conversation without yelling, although you still had to speak up.

Kate led us to a table and we put our liquor bottles and cups of ice down. Our table was right next to another table of three guys and four girls that looked familiar. Kate said hi to them and introduced us. As I said hi, I realized that they looked familiar because they had been at the other club earlier tonight. The guys looked the same, but the girls were now in nighties. One lady, wearing a long white vintage nightie similar to the one I almost bought said, "I love your gown, that is sexy, can I see the back?"

"Thank you," I said, as I turned around. I caught Caleb's eye as I turned. I stuck my tongue out at him, no longer as nervous as I had been, but still unsure about all this. When I was facing the vintage nightie again I said, "I almost got one kind of like yours, I love that vintage look."