Once a Soldier (Rogues Redeemed) (21 page)

Chapter 28

T
he day had been long and tiring and it might already be too late, but Athena couldn’t delay any longer. She might not have another chance. She undressed and donned her long night robe, then unpinned her hair and brushed it loose over her shoulders and back.

Quietly she stepped from her room into the long corridor that led from one end of the floor to the other. The castle was silent, and enough moonlight entered the windows at both ends of the passage that she didn’t need a candlestick to light her way.

Soft-footed as Sofia’s cat, she made her way to the far end of the corridor and tapped on Will’s door to alert him, since she was sure that startling an experienced soldier wasn’t a good idea. When she got no response, she tried the handle. The door opened easily and she stepped into the bedroom.

A wide swath of moonlight splashed across the bed, limning Will’s bare, powerful torso with silver light. He lay on his side, one arm over a pillow and the lower part of his body covered by a blanket. “Will?”

He came awake instantly. “Athena, what’s wrong?” He pushed himself up to a sitting position. As the blanket slid lower, it was obvious that he was quite gloriously naked. “It’s too quiet to be the French invasion come early.”

Her lips twisted ruefully. “A different kind of invasion.”

She stepped forward into the moonlight, wishing she had a tenth of her mother’s allure. “We could easily have been killed on the trail. It made me recognize how foolish my doubts and fears are. I discovered that I don’t want to die without . . . without sharing your bed.” Her voice faltered. “That is, if you still want me. I wouldn’t blame you if you’ve lost interest. . . .”

“Want you?” His smile lit up the room as he extended his hand. “My dear girl, I can’t imagine a day when I won’t want you. Come to me.”

Weak with relief, she stepped forward and clasped his hand with her shaking fingers. Unsure what he believed about her, she said uncertainly, “I’m not a virgin.”

“Neither am I.” He pulled her down onto the bed and embraced her, his arms enfolding her with strength and tenderness. “Please tell me this isn’t a dream.” He buried his face in the loose waves of her hair, his warm breath teasing her throat. “No, if it is a dream, don’t tell me. I don’t want it to end.”

She laughed a little, relaxing in his welcome. “This is real. You’re
very
real. I have trouble remembering why I resisted you so intensely when I wanted you so much.”

“From what you’ve said about your childhood, your doubts were understandable.” He pulled back a little so he could study her face in the moonlight, his gaze probing. “Danger has a way of stripping away lesser concerns, but when danger has passed, it’s easy to regret actions taken when death seemed imminent. If you think you might have regrets later, now is the time to retreat.” His mouth twisted. “I don’t want you to go, but neither do I want you to have any regrets.”

“The only regrets I’ll have is that I’ve waited so long,” she said honestly. “Don’t hold anything back, Will.”

His brows arched. “Maybe you should clarify what you mean by that?”

With difficulty, she said, “I told you that I would never want to bring an illegitimate child into the world, but I’ve realized that I want rather fiercely to have your baby.” Her smile was self-mocking. “In other words, I’m as selfish as my mother. Though I think what she craved was any child, and I want only yours. That’s unlikely when we have so little time, but I will rejoice if it happens.”

He sucked his breath in. “That’s the greatest compliment I’ve ever received. If you’re sure . . .”

“I’m sure.” Growing impatient, she rolled forward and pressed her lips to his.

He responded as if she was a spark and he was tinder. “Athena,” he breathed.
“Goddess . . .”

He kissed her more deeply, drawing her against him so that their bodies pressed together and his great, warm hands roamed over the curves and valleys of her back and sides. “So elegant and strong,” he murmured. When his exploring hand slid under a fold of her robe, his voice changed. “And you are most interestingly naked under your robe!”

She ducked her head in embarrassment. “One of the alarming pieces of maternal wisdom Delilah gave me was that very few men can resist a naked female body. Perhaps that’s how she seduced my father, the dreadful duke. I’m sure this method was more reliable in her case, but I . . . I thought that if you were undecided, I could take off my robe. Just to make my humiliation complete if you still rejected me.”

She could joke about it, since he hadn’t rejected her. She hadn’t even had to drop her robe.

Will laughed. “There is truth in her words, but not the whole truth. Female nakedness is always interesting, but even more important is that the female be interesting. And you, little owl, are the most interesting woman I’ve ever met.”

“I’m not a
little
anything!” she protested.

“A long and lovely owl? True, perhaps, but not as good a pet name.” He gently pushed her onto her back and untied the sash of her robe. “You are a banquet, my lady,” he said, his voice thickening. “Strong and lithe and exquisitely female.”

He caressed her bare body from shoulder to hip before returning to her breast. She gasped as he thumbed her nipple. It hardened instantly, sending jolts of sensation to deep, secret places.

His hand moved to her other breast and he leaned in for a kiss that began with warm lips and sliding tongues, then moved. “A banquet of irresistible taste and texture,” he said huskily.

Wherever his mouth touched, he brought every fiber of her being to shocking life. His tongue traced her ear. Who knew that ears were so insanely sensitive? Her throat arched against his lips, utterly vulnerable. A delicate nibble along her collarbone. Her breasts, dear God, her
breasts
!

She felt the powerful length of his arousal against her thigh and rubbed against it, loving his gasp and the jerk of his reaction. She did not want to be alone in this spiraling madness. As sensation drowned her rational mind, she simultaneously wanted this intimacy to progress, and to last forever.

When his mouth resumed its downward path, she panted, “I . . . don’t know how much longer I can bear this. I may burst into flaming embers.”

“That’s rather the point.” He laughed softly, with his warm breath stirring the lightly tangled hair at the juncture of her thighs.

Then his wicked, sinful mouth and tongue reached her most sensitive female places and she did burst into flames. Her hips churned and her fingers dug into his shoulders until the inferno faded, leaving her limp and stunned. “Oh, my . . . ,” she breathed. “Oh,
my . . .
!”

He hummed with satisfaction as he rested his head on her belly. His breath was almost as ragged as hers. “Are you still sure about wanting all of me?”

“Oh, yes.
Yes!
” She had a fierce need to give him equal pleasure so this mating would be burned into his soul as intensely as it was burning into hers.

He shifted to brace himself above her, his powerful thighs between hers. She skimmed her hands over his beautiful, broad shoulders, down his chest, and over his ribs. So much power and strength and masculinity revealed, and for these precious moments, they were all hers. “If I’m Athena, you are Hercules, a man so splendid that he was transformed into a god.”

He laughed. “Moonlight glamorizes. Except in the case of you, where it enhances the beauty that is already there.”

Supporting himself with one arm, he let the fingers of his other hand drift to the still pulsing folds of her most intimate places. She’d thought she was beyond sensation, but found that wasn’t true. Her hips began moving again as she yearned for a different kind of completion.

Daring, she reached down and clasped him. He gasped and froze for an instant. Then he leaned into her, sliding forward slowly but with inexorable power. “It’s been a long time for you, hasn’t it?” he said raggedly.

“Very.”
She shivered with rich satisfaction and raised her hips, taking him deeper inside her. He was so powerful and male and
right.
“This was worth waiting for.”

He began to move and she found that responding to each other’s rhythms was a new kind of profound pleasure. She absorbed his strength and need and returned it with all the passion she’d suppressed so long.

She was so attuned to his body that she didn’t recognize the increasing urgency of her own until she experienced another shattering culmination as he groaned and poured himself into her. Her body thrashed convulsively as she broke and was remade. Never again would she be the woman she had been, nor did she want to be.

Tension eased out of him and he rolled to his side so he wouldn’t crush her. As he gathered her against him, he murmured, “That was even more amazing than I had dreamed possible.” He kissed her forehead. “I am so very glad you’re here.”

“So am I. And
very
glad I gave you a guest room with a large bed!” She loved the intimacy of this skin-to-skin touching. She loved how the dim light sculpted the planes and muscles of his beautiful male body. Most of all, she loved the intimacy and sense of rightness between them.

Will murmured, “What are you thinking? I do hope it’s not that you’ve made a ghastly mistake.”

“Never that!” She laid her hand on his chest, feeling the sturdy beat of his heart. “I was wondering if Delilah felt like this with her lovers, if that was why she had so many. But how could she possibly feel this way with multiple men?”

“It’s an interesting question,” Will said thoughtfully. “There is great pleasure in the pure animal satisfaction of mating with a well-matched partner. But emotional mating adds so much more. She might have loved the physical pleasure, but never found the deeper emotional connection. Maybe she had many lovers because she was looking for more than the physical satisfaction.”

“Perhaps. I’ll never know. But she had a restless disposition. Maybe the satisfactions she found were always fleeting.” Her brow furrowed. “I’d hate to think that was true with you. I want more, not less.”

“As do I. You realize that now I’ll start nagging you to marry me.”

Athena rolled to her side so her back was to him. “I overcame my qualms about becoming lovers, but marriage is another matter.”

Will rolled over behind her so they were spooned together, his arm around her waist, his legs warming the back of hers. “Wouldn’t you like to sleep like this every night for the rest of your life?” He brushed a kiss on the side of her throat.

She reached back to pat his bare flank. “We’d freeze in England.”

He promptly reached down and pulled a blanket up over them both, then settled behind her again. “We’ll adapt. There’s something very fine about being cuddled together in a warm bed while wild storms rattle the windows.”

A brittle edge sounded in her voice. “That does sound rather nice, but I’m still Lady Whore’s Daughter.”

“Our past is part of who we are, but you’d be Lady Masterson,” he pointed out. “There might be some difficult moments, but I will not let any man insult you, and I guarantee that my closest friends and family will be entirely on your side.”

“I’ve lived as an outcast too long to be easily persuaded that I can become part of the privileged establishment,” she whispered, her throat aching. “And such questions are moot when we may not survive the next week.”

“There is that,” he agreed, his hand coming to rest on her breast. “But we might both survive. You’re much more likely to do so than I am, so tomorrow morning I’ll write my brother and tell him who you are and what you are to me. He will be your friend, and be an uncle to your child if you have one. You’ll never have to fear poverty again.”

She drew a shaky breath. “It must be lovely to trust someone so much.”

“I would trust Mac with anything. If you need to find him, he’s Sir Damian Mackenzie, his club is named Damian’s and it’s on Pall Mall. His London house is right next door. Remember that.”

“Damian Mackenzie, Damian’s, Pall Mall,” she repeated dutifully.

His arm tightened around her waist. “Or we could invite the priest up from the town and have him marry us in the morning so you and any possible child will have the protection of my name and fortune. A daughter would be well dowered, and a son would be the next Lord Masterson.”

“You’re relentless, aren’t you?” she said, more amused than irritated.

“Yes,” he admitted. “At least, when the goal is worthy. As you are, little owl.”

The endearment almost destroyed her defenses. Deciding they needed a change in topic, she asked, “What was your wife like? Unless you can’t bear to speak of her.”

After a lengthy silence, he said, “Lily was bright and pretty and full of life and optimism. I’ve always been dull and sober. . . .”

“That is
not
how I would describe you!”

“You didn’t know me at twenty-one,” Will said dryly. “But we were young and ripe to fall in love and we tumbled happily into marriage. I didn’t realize how delicate her health was. She knew her heart was weak, but she never told me. We were delighted to learn she was with child. But she began fading before my eyes.

“I called in the best physician in London and he said she should never have tried to have a child, but by then, it was too late. All I could do was watch her grow weaker and weaker. She gave birth prematurely and . . . she and our son did not survive.”

Athena rolled onto her back so she could study his face. “I’m so very sorry, Will. Life is too often cruel.”

She was trying to think what else she might say when he blurted out, “I should have known she wasn’t strong enough! The evidence was there, but I didn’t see it. I was a damned fool. I wanted to believe that we were too young and happy for tragedy to strike.”

Athena took his hand, gripping it tightly. “Such optimism is part of being young. It’s not a sin.”