On Becoming His - Lessons Learned (20 page)

BOOK: On Becoming His - Lessons Learned
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“You’re doing very well.”

Goddamn what did she give a shit if she was doing well? Just get this fucking shit over with. Panting, she braced herself for another harsh volley. And it came. Shit. It came.

After every strike, he waited as if counting and Jessie knew this was bot
hering him as much as the whipping was hurting. But in as the last strikes were counted down in her mind, she felt a sense of reprieve and peace flow through her. Perhaps this had been nothing more than a test – for both of them. The second the belt sliced across her ass cheeks for the last time, she lowered her face to the bedding, crying softly. She heard first the sound of the belt being dropped to the floor, then Luke’s single moan.

“I’m going to be in the living room. Take your time
, Jezebel. We’ll make dinner together and talk about the trip when you come in.” His words were stilted. Hollow.

There was
such sadness in his voice and for a few seconds she remained still, tears slipping from her eyes for a myriad of reasons. Had she pushed him too far?

 

Minutes later she walked into the living room, finding the room empty. Her ass ached but her heart was in anguish.
Please God help me be a better woman. Help me allow Luke to be the man he needs to be.
The silent prayer seemed cathartic. Luke wasn’t in the kitchen either. She could see him on the deck, his hand gripping the railing tightly, his head lowered. Her heart raced knowing she had to ask a pointed question and yet she truly didn’t want to know the answer. As she walked out onto the deck and moved beside him, she remained quiet.

“You did well.”

“I was a fool to push you,” Jessie whispered.

“No more than I was a fool not to explain why I was having difficulty. You see…”

Placing her fingers across his mouth, she shook her head. “I know why you’ve been having problems and while I want you to tell me, talk to me about what happened with Suzzana, I know you’ll tell me when you’re ready.” The look of shock in his eyes made her suck in his breath. When he smiled and nodded, she was nothing but relieved. Maybe one day she really could learn patience.

“And I will. That I promise.”

“I know. I’m going to get a glass of wine. Would you like one?” Jessie asked, hoping he’d pull her into his arms.

“Yes, thank you.”

When he didn’t she merely smiled and walked toward the kitchen.
Suzzana.

“Jezebel.”

“Yes?” She stopped short, her heart racing.


Suzzana was the love of my life and meant the world to me. That is until I met you. I love you and you are my heart and soul. You leave me breathless and still me. I promise you Suzzana will never come between us again. Do you understand?”

Turning slightly, Jessie nodded. “Yes, Sir.” There was much more to this story, but she realized she, no they had a lifetime in which to learn. “I love you.”

“My sweet, Jezebel, I love you.”

As she walked into the kitchen she remained at peace. Her Sir Luke was removing the mask little by little. Now it was her turn to allow him to become the Dom they both wanted an
d needed. For becoming her Sir was going to take more than just patience and trust. Now she was ready to lose herself to her lover, her friend and her owner. For she belonged to only one man – the love of her life.

 

The End

 

 

 

 

HIS DISAPPOINTMENT

 

A feeling of anxiety settled into my stomach from seeing his face

His surprised face

A moment of self-doubt swept through my system understanding what I’d done

And I shivered

Knowing

Anticipating

And chastising myself

 

A concept of hoping was dashed after stealing a glance into his eyes

His pain filled eyes

A heightened level of anger boiled within me as I retraced my steps

And I exhaled slowly

Hurting

Longing

And hating myself

 

An acceptance of what would be stilled my heart from watching his hands

His anger clenched hands

A serene silence shadowed my mind as a single moan escaped my lips

And I allowed tears to fall

Wishing

Crying

And loathing myself

 

An admittance of guilt flowed from my mouth after brushing my fingers across his arm

His sweat-laden arm

A dense roaring echo drummed though my ears as I bit back bitter bile

And I fell to the floor

Whimpering

Shaking

And destroying myself

 

A rationalization of what this would mean to our love dawned after studying his face

His disappointed face

A growing hunger to completely submit my body and soul flashed into my heart

And I lifted my hand

Begging

Pleading

And torturing myself

 

Silence

And then he walked out the door…

WILLFUL

 

You remain willful…

His statement reverberated in the back of her mind as she stood gripping the edge of the counter

The understanding of his words remaining the only constant

And yet she wanted to change

Needed to change

And become the completion of his soul

 

You try my patience…

His reminder made her shake her head, disappointment all consuming as she grabbed her glass of wine

The meaning of his sentiment challenging the woman from before

But she wanted to be owned

Needed to be owned

And fulfill the ripped hole in her soul

 

You forget your place…

His chastisement forced a slight moan from her lips as she gulped her drink and knew he was right

The acceptance of her continued faults a necessary evil

Yet she wanted to be controlled

Needed to be controlled

And solidify their strong commitment 

 

You need to be disciplined…

His sharp statement sent tremors down her spine as her heart raced but there was nothing she wanted more

The desire for punishment a freeing need

And she wanted to be whipped

Needed to be whipped

And completely succumb to his needs

 

You forget to call me Sir…

His harsh tone allowed a moment of tension between them and she wrinkled her nose, looking for forgiveness

The strong belief of their sacred bond a telling reminder

And she wanted to call him Sir

Needed to call him Sir

And she made a final promise to herself

 

You forever still my heart…

His powerful voice sent a warm glow of love enshrouding her body as she turned and faced the man

The intensity of his love filled eyes a final statement that she belonged

And then she called him Sir

Would always call him Sir

And would forever belong to him

ON BECOMING HER SIR

 

 

There was a wretched secret strangling his life, one that was killing him. For Luke Brennan, every dream was filled with a growing agony regarding the past, one he’d run from. The truths were brutal and now he refused to lie any longer. He was a monster. Sharing what had to be the most incredible D/s lifestyle with a woman he adored as well as treasured as his collared submissive, every day should have been filled with pure joy. Instead, the torture that burned deep within was overpowering, driving him into depths of hell. Then again, he deserved no less.

 

For Jezebel Waters, the journey they’d shared as they continued into such an emotional and uninhibited relationship was exhilarating. She’d found the woman buried beneath a lifetime of lies. Submitting to a powerful but loving Dom was the most incredible decision of her life. Sadly, she knew Luke was holding back something… No matter their level of trust or their deep conversations, he refused to trust her enough. And so the damning secret was tearing them apart.

 

On a fateful trip, one meant to begin yet another phase delving deeper into their emotional connection, tragedy struck, forcing Luke to face the very demon he’d pushed aside. He struggled with certain decisions, ones that could affect her life, until he was nearly lost to the madness. Somehow their deep devotion and an unbridled love brought them closer together as secrets were revealed. But was it too late?

 

Coming late summer 2013…

 

 

 

 

 

 

About Cassandre

 

Cassandre writes highly erotic romance stories and novels in the contemporary, science fiction and paranormal flavors. Currently she has over eighty erotic romance novels published with Rebel Ink Press and several more under contract. Her recent titles include:
Uncuff Me
,
Unwrap Me
,
Like a River, Hot Summer Nights Collection, Dirty Little Lunches Collection, Dirty Little Secrets Collection, His Wrath, Done,
Unleashed
,
Rustling Danger
,
Extreme Position,
Ride and Wild Pony,
and several m/m pieces including
Game Over, Power Struggle
and
Punch Back, Like a River
, and the recently re-released
Male Order
. Her first print release – a compilation of several pieces titled
The Feast of Temptation
was released in September of 2011 with a second for the m/m genre set for release in 2013. Her m/m titles including
Punchback, Shattered, Hearts Forged in Fire
,
His Wrath, Done, Like a River,
every
Hot Summer Nights
and every
Sizzling Winter Nights
piece received silver stars from ARe within hours of their release. She has over twenty more to release in 2013 with Rebel Ink.

 

She’s also had several releases with Naughty Nights Press –
Spankdown,
Red Fire – Surrender
,
Raging Shadows
,
Forced Fantasies
,
Mr. Mistletoe
and
Oral Sex – Hot Shots, Phone Sex – Hot Shots
with the second in the
Fire Trilogy – Blue Fire, Domination –
receiving a silver star and
Dazzle
and
Bad Things. Staged Whispers
and
Yellow Fire
are set to release soon and several more planned for 2013.
Bad Things – Hunger
was just released in print.

 

In addition, as her alter ego Bethany Halle, she is the host of two blog talk radio shows with Robin Falls Red River Radio. The Fire of Fantasy & Darkness airs every other month highlighting writers and other artists in the fantasy, science fiction and paranormal genres. Dare to Take the Plunge also airs every other month featuring writers, publishers, cover artists and reviewers in the erotic romance genre. She also is a weekly/monthly contributor to Naughty Nights Press, Red Lipstick Diaries, 69 Shades of Smut, After Dark Online, Kinke Magazine and the recently reopened Queer Magazine Online.

 

As Bethany Halle, she is also the Director of Communications for Rebel Ink Press.

 

She was a Passionate Ink finalist for their Passionate Plume contest with
Treats in a Plain Brown Wrapper
and has received several four and five star reviews for her work.
Bad Things – Hunger
just received third place in the Paranormal Romance Guild’s coveted Reviewer’s Books of the Year for Erotica Paranormal Romance and second for in the Erotic Paranormal Romance Series. She also received an honorable mention from the Love Romance Café as the 2011 Author of the year and her book
Her Sinful Long Legs
was a best erotic contemporary romance of 2011 at The Romance Reviews nominee.

 

 

 

 

Member of:

 

Virginia Romance Writers

Romance Writers of America

Passionate Ink

EPIC

ARRA – Australian Romance Readers Association

Paranormal Romance Guild

 

[email protected]

http://www.cassandredayne.com

http://twitter.com/bethanyhalle

http://cassandredayne.wordpress.com/

http://pinterest.com/cassandredayne/
 

http://www.romancenovelcenter.com/cassandredayne
 

 

On Becoming His Facebook Fan
Pag
e
  
http://wp.me/P1a53P-Fi

 

 

https://www.amazon.com/author/cassandredayne

 

http://wickedlysexywriters.wordpress.com/
 

 

http://queermagazineonline.com/magazine/everything-books/author-pages/item/6841-cassandre-dayne
 

 

 

Purchase Links:

http://www.allromanceebooks.com/storeSearch.html?searchBy=author&qString=Cassandre+Dayne

 

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=Cassandre+Dayne&x=16&y=24

 

 

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