Ode to the Queen (7 page)

My every whim would be catered to, people would always be around for company and I could hardly complain of the types of guys that were about. None were sore on the eyes at all.

Particularly one.

His absence though didn’t go unnoticed to me, nor to the others when someone pointed out Charlotte was missing too. One of the other Goddesses made a passing comment to a friend about how neither was to be found now.

Her friend replied softly, “yeah but they’ve been hooking up since they got here. They came on the same day.”

Something raged inside of me then, twisting and poisoning me with jealousy. A voice in my head yelled angrily that Charlotte was supposed to be a virgin Goddess and running around with a hedonistic God was not the way of maintaining one’s chastity.

That voice yelled and shouted; it called her all sorts of obscene names before I found the will to question why I even cared.

With Aidan I was so adamant that I wasn’t his soul mate, his wife, his ‘Queenie’ as he called me and yet I was getting jealous of him being with other women as though I possessed him.

Shaking my head I told myself to calm down and stop thinking about it because in the end it didn’t matter but the stranger voice refused to be quieted completely.

So I stood, wanting to distract myself instead in order to hush it. The party was dying down now without the two main attractions and there was no better time than to take Hunter back to mine to help with the TV stand. Maybe if I was lucky Aidan would be there and I’d get a reaction now. Not that it mattered the plan had already failed. At least I would get the TV stand fixed up again.

Standing up, I rewrapped my sarong around my hips and made my way over to where Hunter and Royce were sitting with a couple other girls. I came up behind him and set my hands on his shoulders, running them slightly down to his chest as I leaned over him to see his face.

“Ready to go?” I smiled before glancing at his little party, “you don’t mind if I steal him right?” They politely shook their head but some of the girls were elementary in hiding their thoughts with their eyes and fake smiles. I smiled as apologetically as I could, before I straightened up and Hunter stood.

“I’ll see you around,” I shot at Royce who gave me a quick wave probably pleased that he was left with all these rejected female prides he could sooth. I smiled to myself and shook my head before heading to the door with Hunter at my side.

“Have fun today?” He asked lightly.

“You know what, I think I did. I mean, it feels like it went by in the blink of an eye so I’m hoping that means I did enjoy myself.” I smiled, “what about you?”

“Yeah, I really enjoyed meeting the people I did.” His eyes flashed slightly at me and I smiled, blushing gently. He continued, “They say you’re Hera, is that true?”

I shrugged, “I don’t really know. My Goddess hasn’t come to me yet.” Hunter laughed, somewhat relieved and I smiled, although not entirely sure why I was.

“Good because I can’t imagine what Aidan would say or do if you were and I was going back to your room with you.”

I shrugged, “I just need your help moving some furniture.” Though definitely coming back to my room after we’d spent the day drinking would give anyone the impression there was something more to this than furniture, so I understood his apprehension.

With that in mind I smiled, “don’t worry… I’ll protect you from Aidan.”

It was a teasing remark because we were both sure that Aidan wouldn’t do anything. Or I was half sure, I didn’t even know if Aidan was going to see or ever know about this.

The hallway was empty as we made our way up to my apartment door. A sick disappointment clenched at my throat when we didn’t run into Aidan and Charlotte. I couldn’t understand what was making me feel this way, this intensely. I really didn’t care that much about what Aidan thought, at least that’s what I really was telling myself. But I was definitely feeling differently.

Pushing the door open I smiled invitingly at Hunter as we made our way into the apartment. Hunter came to a full stop in front of me, softly musing to himself as he took in the disaster of the TV stand.

“You weren’t kidding about the furniture thing…”

Following him in I merely shook my head, lacking the words for an explanation. The door clicked shut and he turned to me, his eyes bright as a smile played on his lips.

“I can fix that later…” He advanced somewhat, and my heart jumped as I realised that I had played my intentions a bit too strong. He genuinely thought I was going to give him some thanks in return for helping with the TV. Slipping away, I padded over to the counter and fixed the kettle full of water on the hot burner before turning to face him.

“I want some tea, would you like a cup?” He shook his head and came toward me again. Unfortunately, it seemed I had played this way too strong. What would he do if I told him the truth? Could his God be as volatile as mine? I really wasn’t in the mood to test that bet.

“I think I drank too much wine.” I giggled, trying to play it off like maybe I was a bit
too
drunk for anything. “Would you mind working on the TV while I make my tea to clear my head?”

The disappointment on his face was barely hidden but he quickly got over it and nodded, “sure thing.”

I watched him with some relief as he made his way over to inspect the damage. He bent over, rear toward me and I couldn’t help the small smirk that grew on my lips. Shaking my head I chastised myself - I didn’t want that, I had just told him so.

God, why was my head split between so many different things? Shaking it to clear my thoughts, I turned back to the kettle and focused on that.

“God, how did you do this?” Noises echoed from behind me as he started to work. Finally, the telltale whistle of boiling water gave me a reprieve from my own anxiety and desperation. I needed to quickly figure out a way to get rid of him before this went any further.

But short of telling him the truth, and still something in my gut told me this was a very bad idea, I had nothing else I could possibly say to fix the situation in my favour.

Pouring the hot water on top of the bag I watched almost mesmerisingly as it floated up, bloated and saturating the water. Pushing it back under water I used the spoon to press out more of the bag’s flavours watching the water turn darker and darker. I added milk, making the water a caramel shade as it spread through the tea and I set the spoon off on the side, lifting the mug up as a shield. Worst-case scenario if he tried to get closer, I could toss the hot liquid on him.

I hoped it didn’t come to that.

Crossing the room slowly my eyes took in Hunter as he worked at resetting everything that had fallen. As I had suspected, for a man his size, there had been no need to worry that he wouldn’t be able to manage it on his own. Unfortunately, however, he seemed to be almost done by the time my tea was made.

Slipping down onto the couch I set the hot mug on the arm to free my hands from the scalding ceramic for a moment as I wondered softly, “How long have you known you were Poseidon?”

Hunter looked up in surprise at the question before grinning broadly and giving a half-hearted shrug.

“Not as long as some but I knew before Atlas came for me. I just didn’t know who it was. I surf, and whenever I was in the ocean I could hear him talking to me. He moved me through the waves and motions. I started going to the beach every day just to make the voice in my head stop, or at least I thought it was making it stop. But the more time I spent in the ocean the more united we became…”

He ran a wandering hand through his blonde hair, offering me another one of those cocky smiles before he moved over to the couch and slipped down beside me.

“I suppose in a way the voice dulled a little as it became my own inner thoughts and yet not, if you know what I mean…” I didn’t though, but the more people told me about their experiences the more I wanted my own Goddess to start talking to me. I wanted to understand what it was like to have that second conscious that was fully awake and guiding…

Especially now as Hunter leaned closer, his hand slipping out and settling on my thigh as his face closed in next to mine. My head told me that I should rise, move away and make him follow if only to stall a moment longer but another part of me knew I was trapped no matter what.

A feeble attempt to flee resulted in my shoulders drawing back against the arm of the couch. I felt the mug move before I realised exactly what it was. The clatter echoed through the room and we both jumped, I rose quickly thankful for my naïve clumsiness as Hunter stood up as well to examine the damage.

“Ah, I’ll get a towel.” I didn’t register at first where he was going until his movement caught my eye. Hunter had reached for the doorknob of the connecting door between our apartments. By the time I made to stop him it was too late and the door was already opened.

This didn’t stop me from crossing the room and trying to grab the door myself before whatever laid behind it was revealed. But as I came up beside Hunter my eyes fell on the view on which he too was looking upon and we both stood frozen in the threshold, staring at Charlotte poised on top of Aidan on his couch. The couple weren’t aware of their audience at first and the longer the image was burned into my mind, the closer my body drew to Hunter for protection.

That didn’t help; it didn’t even ease the pain slightly that went through me. I told myself it was foolish to feel that way because he didn’t belong to me. My lack of claim over him also didn’t give me leave to feel the jealousy that coursed through my veins but I couldn’t stop it.

Something inside of me wanted to scream and rip Charlotte off of him, throw her across the room and unleash the anger of hell on her. And maybe Hunter sensed this, drawing me closer and wrapping an arm around me as the other pair turned and made eye contact with us.

Aidan hardly looked like he cared at all that I saw this or that I was with someone else other than him. Charlotte however, had the audacity to smirk at me and look down at Aidan before leaning down to kiss him.

She seemed to enjoy putting on a bit of a show and it only further aggravated me. My fingers curled around Hunter’s arm as we stood there, just letting her do it and when I finally couldn’t take it anymore I reached out and slammed the door shut.

The noise was so loud it echoed throughout the room for a moment before dying down and we were left in a silence almost as deafening as the slam before it. We didn’t move for a minute but that was all I needed to react to the situation in the way my mind felt was best. I turned on him, and our eyes met for a minute.

In that second it seemed as though he read my thoughts. And maybe it was because I’d led him here for that exact purpose that he responded the way he did, I also hoped that maybe, in a way, he was intuitively responding to the signals I was sending him. Nonetheless, although it felt like a century, it was only seconds after the door was closed that his arm snaked around my waist and lifted me off the ground.

My back slammed against the wall and I braced myself around his neck just as our lips collided. With my body pinned between his and the wall, his arm came free as his hands gripped my thighs to draw my legs around him. Crushing his body against mine, to close any distance between our forms.

I was a woman possessed; my mind told me I didn’t want to be kissing him while another part of me said I needed it.

If Aidan didn’t want me, then I had to have someone else that would. I knew this feeling too well though. This desperation and desire for acceptance had followed me my entire life. These tones of insecurity had paved the way for all of my past relationships, as I innately desired someone to complete me in a way that had eluded me for so long.

I was conscious that what Hunter offered was only a moment’s reprieve and yet I couldn’t bring myself to stop it. I couldn’t protect myself from the inevitable hurt that always followed.

I needed this moment as Aidan’s rejection coursed through me. Even as fleeting as this fling felt, it was good enough for now. A part of me couldn’t help but be resentful to this fact. I didn’t want to need a man as much as I did but no matter how hard I tried that feeling was always there, forever present.

I could feel his hands drawing up the loose gauze of my sarong, his fingers tickling my skin and pressing down on nerves to send shivers down my spine. His lips felt like they were drawing my soul from me, numbing my own lips with his bruising pressure. My fingers slid up into his hair, curling around the strands in desperation and locking them between my fisted digits. He groaned and the sound vibrated my lips, sending little jolts of electricity through me.

I didn’t want to admit that this had anything to do with our newfound condition but there was certainly something otherworldly about this encounter with Hunter. Simple things, things I was so accustomed to from years of practice, felt a hundred times more magnified. Small touches jarred my bones and pecks didn’t just knot my stomach but made it explode in a cascade of currents. It was shocking how easily he could ignite me when no others had made me feel this way before.

I found myself questioning my own feelings suddenly. Could these reactions simply be the chemical response typical of any two people immensely attracted to each other? It was hard to believe considering the only slightest inkling of emotion I had previously held toward Hunter was how I found him good looking but nothing more.

The more I thought about it and the more I found myself needing an answer, the less the encounter began to appeal to me. No matter how nice it made me feel. Almost instantly something inside of me changed and I wanted nothing to do with him.

My legs gave out from around him and dropped like weights toward the ground. The change woke Hunter from the spell of our kiss and he blinked in surprise, “what’s up?”

I shook my head, words momentarily failing, so my body did the talking and pushed him away from me. Without his support I fell to the ground. I barely managed to catch myself, in order to maintain a semblance of dignity, before I shook my head again as though this simple action would explain everything.

“You need to go.” I said simply, the words sounding foreign even to me as my hazy mind tried to comprehend where this sudden shift had come from. Hunter seemed to be as lost as I felt and he opened his mouth as though he was going to argue but I didn’t let him.

“Now.” I said, pointing toward the door, which as though on command opened and he turned to look at it in surprise.

“Savannah…” Whatever it was he was going to say I never heard. Panic seized me and whatever power had been mustered to open the door was enough to send Hunter flying, just as Aidan had the night before. Throwing men around magically was becoming a trend with me although it gave no insight into which Goddess I was.

His body was telekinetically lifted and flown across the space to the exit before being thrown out like a rag doll. The door even had the sense to close itself behind him, leaving me there alone and confused.

Try as I might to find some sense in this situation I was coming up blank. I was acutely aware, however, that this was the third time my emotions had taken a sudden temperamental turn since getting to Olympus. I wondered vaguely if maybe I was PMSing. But then never before had my emotional range during that time resulted in magically throwing people around like tennis balls. Plus, I had never been this out of control of my own emotions.

I suddenly felt like I no longer knew what I wanted from my life, despite how all my life there had always been a plan. Everything I had done since childhood had been dictated by the pursuit of this vision, but now the vision was gone.

The weight of my situation bore down on me: this was it. No matter what I wanted in my old life, it wasn’t possible anymore here, now. My life was decided for me, the fates had sealed my future and I didn’t like the feeling of being out of control. I most certainly didn’t like the idea of not knowing what came next. This was the price I had to pay if I wanted to accept that I was, in fact, a Greek Goddess. Being Hera, or whoever I was supposed to be, meant that my future was decided. Even if this was supposedly a second chance I couldn’t fight the feelings and desires an ancient Goddess had because I didn’t like them. No doubt she would always overpower me.

Exhaling shakily, I drew a hand through my hair musing it as I walked before bending toward the disgruntled mug on the ground. The rug had already soaked up the tea and it had since dried during our episode so I didn’t bother to worry about cleaning it. I simply moved toward the sink and set it in before allowing my zombie feet to drag me toward the bedroom.

Images of Charlotte and Aidan mysteriously flashed before my eyes and I felt even worse about throwing Hunter out like I had. I wasn’t ever going to explain this hot and cold personality that I suddenly possessed but I knew for sure that I was angry with Charlotte inexplicably and wanted, desperately, to make Aidan jealous. Not that Hunter could’ve helped with that, Aidan hadn’t even blinked seeing us together.

I didn’t bother to change before falling backwards on my bed and exhaling heavily. I wanted answers to the various questions running through my head. But I was exhausted suddenly. No matter how desperately I wanted to understand my need for Aidan’s approval and attention, when I myself had already rejected him once, the answers wouldn’t come right now.

He surprised me though, one minute I hated him and the next I wanted him again. Perhaps he had something to do with the two personalities I was experiencing. But then, that would be me admitting that maybe he was onto something about us being Greek soul mates... and well – the jury was still out on that one.