Chapter Eighteen
Sara and Solomon were in the living room, and Elias heard them whispering to one another as he came up the stairs. Blowing out a breath, he tried to let go of the twang in his nerves. His brother had never hurt him, and if Solomon were going to lose his temper, he would have done it earlier that day. Still, Elias couldn't help being scared.
“Hi.” Elias waved to the two of them. Though he'd rehearsed all the things he'd planned to say, his feet carried him directly to his room.
“Elias?” Solomon came to the doorway.
“Yes?” Elias tossed his jacket on the chair in the corner. He couldn't bring himself to look at his brother.
“Everything okay?”
“Yes.” Elias wished he could say more, to ask his brother to still be there for him.
“Joe's nice.”
Elias wasn't sure how to accept the compliment gracefully. “Thank you.” He cleared his throat, trying to figure out what he wanted from Solomon. Of course Elias would have liked to hear that his brother still loved him no matter what. But Elias couldn't imagine Solomon mustering that level of emotion.
“I like Joe very much.” Elias kept his hands busy folding some laundry.
“Yes. I know.” Solomon's arms were crossed, but his forehead was creased in concern. “Elias, do you still want to live here?”
“Do you still want me to live here?” Elias felt like the breath had been stolen from him.
“If you like.” Solomon was less sure than Elias had ever seen his strong older brother. “But Sara is getting treatment. You don't need to stay for her.”
Elias tried to read between the lines. “Soâ¦you want me to go?”
Solomon pulled Elias's hands away from the laundry and forced Elias to look him in the eye. “No. We don't want you to leave. Not if you don't want to.” Solomon dragged Elias into a hug so fast Elias might have stumbled off his feet. “I have no family left in this country but you.”
Elias was glad his brother was whispering, because Sara might have overheard. Solomon had said it in Englishâbut still. Officially, Sara was family now too.
Solomon and Elias had grown up together, though, straddling the old world and the new. Few people would really understand what that was like, and no one would remember the time their mother had put ketchup-laden hamburgers on injera bread, or the time their father had painted the outside of their house with interior paint because he'd been too proud to admit he couldn't read the sign in Home Depot.
“I know.” Elias patted his brother's back, smelling the comfort of home. “I want to stay.” He might spend nights at Joe's house, but Elias still needed to come home sometimes. To the smells and sounds and familiarity. For now, that meant leaving his clothes here.
“Good.” Solomon broke their embrace to pat Elias's arm. If his gestures were more manful than they'd been before, Elias could forgive him. It wasn't normal for Solomon to express his feelings.
“Good night.” Elias went back to folding, but he smiled as Solomon left.
Joe's knee gave a twinge of pain as he parallel parked. But when it came to climbing out, Joe was amazed at how far he'd come in PT. He'd found a spot two blocks away from the precinct, and he barely used his cane as he made his way the distance. At this point the cane was just for balance when his muscles became fatigued.
“Good morning, Detective.” One of the younger guys opened the door for him as Joe approached.
Joe gave him a nod. “Thanks.”
He made his way down the hallway, and though Joe always tried to keep it stern and professional at work, he couldn't help but smile like an idiot every time someone said, “Welcome back.”
When he passed Mainer's office, the sergeant was on the phone, but he waved at Joe to hold on a second.
Hovering in the hallway, Joe had a quick shot of nerves that Mainer would change his mind. He'd tell Joe to take another few days off, or even a week. Joe gathered his strength. He'd made it this far. Joe could handle anything Mainer threw his way.
“Hey, Joe.” Mainer hung up his phone and motioned Joe inside. “You don't have to close the door.”
Reassured, Joe went into the office. He didn't sit, though. No need to drag this out.
“How are you doing?”
“Fine.”
“You look better.” Mainer glanced him over, and Joe had a feeling his boss was talking about more than Joe's leg.
“I am better.” Joe stood taller than he had before. Since starting physical therapy, Joe bet he'd gained an inch in height. Dr. Soren had Joe working on his back and his alignment and stretching out his neck. Between all the exercises Dr. Soren had him doing and swimming at the Y, Joe felt like he was back in his twenties.
“Great. Wade's got a ton for you to work on.”
As if summoned, Joe's partner came to the door. “Hey! Joe!” Wade smiled like he was genuinely pleased. “You're back.”
“Don't look so surprised.” Joe couldn't help but crack a grin at his partner. He and Wade might not be buddies outside work, but Joe'd missed Wade's dry humor and even Wade's shrink observations about everything.
“Did things work out with that immigrant family?”
Joe rolled his eyes. Elias and his brother were citizens, but Joe didn't see the point in correcting Wade. “Yeah. Thanks for the help with that.”
“No worries.” Wade jerked his head in the direction of their offices. “Come around when you're done here.”
“Yeah.” Joe chuckled. Wade was no doubt plotting to torture Joe with paperwork.
“Doing some volunteer hours during your medical leave?” Mainer looked surprised but also amused.
Joe didn't want to explain, so he just smirked as he headed to the door. “You know me, boss. Always the humanitarian.”
Joe chose a restaurant out by Madison Parkâa little French place with low lighting and flowers on the tables. He'd considered Ethiopian briefly but then thought better of that plan. Elias's sister-in-law probably cooked better at home.
They'd put off their date a couple extra days to give Joe time to rest after starting back to work, and Joe itched with expectation. Out the front window, lights battled with drizzle. Joe shivered every time he saw a head of dark and curly hair pass outside.
They'd said seven, but it was only six forty-five. Still, Joe smiled to see Elias getting off the bus across the street and then coming around the curtains that hung in the doorway. Elias's eyes were bright with excitement, his hair damp. He wore a white dress shirt and slacks with a stylish jacket that he'd obviously chosen more for fashion than warmth.
Joe stood, noticing he barely felt an ache. Or maybe he felt it, but he didn't mind it as much as he used to. Before, Joe'd been scared when he hurtâfreaked out about what it meant. But working with Dr. Soren had taught Joe that pain wasn't the enemy. Fear was what kept Joe stuck in bad habits.
“You're early.” Joe pulled out the chair for Elias. He waited until Elias sat to press a kiss to his temple.
“So are you.” Elias's smile was shy but a lot more knowing than it had been when he and Joe first met. Elias took a sip of water, swallowing in a way obviously designed to draw Joe's eye, and Joe realized with a joltâElias had learned how to flirt. “It's not every day I'm asked to a nice restaurant by a handsome man.”
“Well, it's not every day I have a handsome man to invite out.” Joe had ordered wine, but as he reached for it, he realized he was being presumptuous. “I got a red. Do youâ?”
“That sounds wonderful.” Elias's gaze was permissive, sweet. Like he wanted to be with Joe no matter what they ate or drank.
Joe wondered how he'd ever thought to take advantage of that kindness. “Let me pour you some.” He filled Elias's glass first, and then his own. When they'd both lifted their cups, Joe caught Elias's hand. “How's your sister-in-law doing? Or do you not want to talk about it?”
Elias softened like the air went out of him, and Joe wished they were on his couch so he could pull Elias close. But Elias needed this, and so did Joeâa chance to interact like gentlemen. And a chance for Joe to treat Elias with care.
“She's okay. Much better than before.”
Joe nodded. “Wade knows good docs.” He clinked their wineglasses.
“Yes.” Elias grinned. “And thank you.”
By the time they ordered food, Joe felt the brush of Elias's foot against his. He tried to hide that he was pleased. After all, Elias might have kicked him by accident. A moment later, another limb brushed his under the table. Elias's soft Italian loafer slipped between whatever the hell Joe had put on his feet when he left the house. Honestly, he couldn't remember what he'd worn because he'd been so nervous.
“How's your physical therapy going?” The line of Elias's clavicle showed where his dress shirt had pulled slightly to the side, and Joe found he wanted to take that narrow bone between his teeth.
“Great,” Joe answered honestly. “I'm down to going twice a week.”
“That's good.” Elias's raised eyebrows suggested he was impressed. Or maybe surprised was a better term.
Their food came a moment later, and Joe and Elias waited for one another to start eating, and then both smiled because their gazes caught. Joe couldn't resist. He lifted out of his chair to try for a kiss, but when he couldn't reach, he stepped around the table to get at Elias's cheek.
Elias turned at the last second, brushing Joe's nose, then his lips. That was enough to crack his heart wide open. If they'd been at a slightly more gay-oriented restaurant, he would have pulled Elias out of his seat and kissed him for real. Maybe that was why Joe had chosen someplace more mainstream.
“You sure you should be doing that? With your leg?”
“Oh, I'm not on so many restrictions.” Joe stretched out in his seat. The food was great, but Joe didn't want to rush to the finish. “So long as I don't try jogging yet⦔ He gave Elias his most charming smile.
Elias had been lifting a bite of steak to his lips, and he stopped, spoon suspended halfway and his mouth hanging open. It would have been comical if it didn't make Joe want to climb right over the table to get to him.
“Take me home.” Elias set his food down.
“You sure about that?” Candlelight flickered over their table so gold danced over their food and their glasses, and even over Elias's smooth skin.
“Yes.” Elias's nod wasn't the eager bobbing of a kid anymore, but the slow acknowledgment of a man who knew what he was getting himself into. He'd seen the worst of Joe, and for some reason Elias was still here.
“Sure thing.” Joe waved down a waiter and got their food to go, and when they got outside, he got the kiss he'd wanted so badly.
“Joe?” Elias wove their fingers together to hold his hand as they walked.
“Yeah?”
“Are you well enough toâ¦?” The tentative heat in Elias's eyes let Joe know exactly what Elias was talking about.
He smirked. “Yeah. I think so.” There might not be any acrobatics in their near future, but Joe bet he could handle taking their sex life to the next level. He pulled Elias in closer so he could whisper in his ear. “You think you're ready for me?”
“Mm-hmm.” Elias nodded, biting his lip.
“C'mon. Get in the car.” He clicked the locks on his Priusâthe only really nice thing he owned. Dan had called it his mid-life-crisis car when Joe bought it, but as Joe slid into the heated front seat and palmed the pleather steering wheel, he realized how stupid Dan had been. Joe was just getting started.
Elias was in the passenger side in a snap, so Joe took off to his apartment. He found a parking spot fast enough, and though they stopped to kiss a few times on the stairway up, soon the two of them pushed into Joe's apartment.
They eased off one another's clothes, and Joe didn't even worry when he reached to cup Elias's erection. Elias smiled and opened his mouth in a groanâhis previous skittishness having vanished like clouds clearing in June.
“Oh God.” Elias pumped into Joe's hand a few times, but then he turned to get on the bed. He stayed on his hands and knees, a clear demand of what he wanted.
It wasn't the easiest position for a near virgin, but Joe respected the offer. He got behind Elias, reaching past for supplies. “You know I love you, right?” Joe kissed his way down Elias's spine, stroking his sides. “So fucking much.”
“Yeah.” Elias writhed. “I do too. So much.”
Joe got them ready, but when he tried to go slowly to work himself inside, Elias slammed backâcrying out like it hurt and was amazing and like he'd been waiting to do that since they met.
“Ah, hon.” Joe palmed Elias's hips, holding him tight. When Elias seemed ready, Joe showed him how to move. “You make it feel so good.” Joe kept his voice soothing, so Elias would know it wasn't lack of interest making Joe hold still. “Want you to love it.”
Elias rolled his back, settling further on Joe's cock. Then he pushed up slightly so he was closer to sitting.
Joe leaned back to sit on his calves, a position he was fairly sure he couldn't have done even before the shooting and to which he owed entirely to the stretches he did in PT.
“Joe⦔ Elias dropped his head back onto Joe's shoulder.
He wrapped his arms around Elias. Though Joe worried it might get Elias off too soon, he gripped Elias under the balls, working his way closer to his cock.
“Only you,” Joe whispered in Elias's ear, because he was pretty sure that's what Elias was thinking too. “And only me.”
“Oh God.” Elias clamped a hand around Joe's. The rigid shaft in Joe's hand said Elias was just as close as Joe was.
“You hold on for me, okay?”
Elias nodded.
Joe cupped the base of Elias's cock, squeezing to help him hold off. When Elias's breathing slowed, Joe eased them forward so Elias was on his belly. “Go ahead and come on the sheets,” Joe teased. “I don't mind.” Then he found a good, deep grind.