Nothing to Ghost About (7 page)

He waved his arms. “I don’t need
water. I need these people to leave. I need them not to make a
mockery of my daughter.”

Anna was writing in a notebook and
smiling. That couldn’t be good.

“
Grandpa, I think you had
better leave,” Daisy said, placing her hand on his arm.

“
Why should I leave?” Frank
roared.

“
I don’t think you should
see Mom,” Daisy said quietly.

To my dismay, Frank managed to grasp
her meaning right away. “You didn’t!”

“
Grandpa, please,” Daisy
said.

“
Let me see her!” He shook
Daisy’s hand from his arm and hurried into the viewing
room.

I couldn’t bring myself to follow him.
I remained in the foyer. I grimaced every time he yelled. Just when
I thought things couldn’t get any worse, Anna hurried over to
me.

“
This sure makes a good
story!” she said with malice.

Chapter 9

After the clown funeral, Mom could
barely bring herself to speak to me. I knew she just wanted to
shout, “I told you so!” over and over, and for once I was impressed
by her restraint.

The cleaning lady Mom paid to come by
once a week was coming today, and that meant Mom was feverishly
cleaning everything. Not a single thing would need to be cleaned
after my mother had finished with it. And of course, Susan, the
woman who came to clean, went to my mother’s church.

Mom was scrubbing the upstairs
bathroom when Tara arrived, unannounced. I made some sandwiches and
prepared a salad, and then ducked up to the bathroom to see if Mom
wanted to join us for lunch. She did not. Tara and I had just
started eating when Mom came in.

“
Tara!” Mom exclaimed.
“Laurel didn’t tell me you were here.” I had actually told her, but
she must have been so busy polishing the bathroom floor that she
hadn’t really heard me.

“
Oh, I hope that’s okay,”
Tara said.

“
Of course, but had I
known, I would have cleaned the house.”

I shot her a look. “Mom, you’ve been
cleaning all day.”

“
You know what I mean,” she
snapped at me. “Laurel, you dropped some crumbs on the floor!
Whatever will Susan think? Clean them up before she arrives. I
can’t be embarrassed by you any longer.”

I was bending over the floor looking
for the crumbs that Mom thought were there, when I heard her
strident voice once more.

“
Laurel, you should be
using the good plates!” she said loudly. “And you should be sitting
in the dining room.”

“
We’re just having
sandwiches,” I protested.

“
Nonsense. Tara, please let
me set you up in the dining room.”

Tara knew my mom well enough to know
it wasn’t worth trying to argue, and so we spent ten minutes
letting her move us into the dining room. Mom opened an old cedar
cabinet and brought out her best antique fine bone china, musty
smell and all. She made a big display of setting the table. “This
is Meissen china,” she announced proudly. “From the eighteenth
century. Laurel and I eat from it all the time.”

“
No, we don’t,” I said
without thinking, staring at the Chinese scenes.

Mom turned her steely gaze on me.
“Laurel, I smelled an unholy scent emanating from your room earlier
today. Were you indulging in New Age practices again?”

“
If you mean my lemongrass
candle, then yes,” I said.

Mom looked as if she were about to say
something, but then her hand flew to her mouth. “The soap!” Mom
exclaimed. She left the room in a hurry.

“
The soap?” Tara
asked.

“
The good hand soap for the
bathroom,” I said. “I get the cheap stuff, but you get the good
stuff. If only she knew you were a witch!”

Tara paled. “Don’t ever tell
her.”

“
Of course not,” I said.
“She’d call in a whole prayer team to conduct an
exorcism!”

Tara laughed. “Anyway, I came around
because I have news. I mentioned Anna Stiles to Duncan last night.
I was telling him that you were worried that she’s going to write a
bad story about the clown funeral. Duncan told me that the hit and
run victim had been in contact with her for a lengthy period of
time, according to the phone records. He thought it was pretty
strange.”

I considered the news for a moment.
“She’s a journalist, though, and he was an infamous crime boss,” I
said. “Sure, he had served time and was allegedly on the straight
and narrow, but he’s the type of person a journalist would
interview. But didn’t you say the detectives don’t tell Duncan
anything?”

Tara shook her head. “I
said they don’t tell him
much
,” she corrected me. “They ask
Duncan questions, and that tips him off as to what leads they’re
following.”

I smiled. “I knew Anna Stiles was
evil.” I had a momentary fantasy about her being dragged away in
handcuffs, and then locked in prison without access to makeup or
gym equipment.

“
Have you thought of any
other suspects?” Tara asked. “What about the mayor’s wife? She was
ripped off by the dead guy, according to Duncan. She showed up at
his funeral. Isn’t that weird?”

“
She went to the funeral?”
I asked. “Why?”

“
That’s what I just said!”
Tara laughed. “It’s weird.”

We sat in silence for a moment, our
lunch forgotten.

“
So what now?” Tara
asked.

“
I’m not sure,” I admitted.
“More digging, I guess. It seems like I should look into the whole
situation with the mayor’s wife.”

Tara nodded. “She had the motive, as
her family heirloom was stolen by the dead guy. Duncan said she
never did get it back.” She stood up. “I have to go. Thanks for
lunch. I’ll help you clear the table.”

I waved her off. “No, that’s fine.” I
showed Tara to the door and then cleared the table, gingerly taking
Mom’s three hundred year old china into the kitchen and placing it
carefully on the countertop.

Ernie was in the kitchen, staring
longingly at the refrigerator. “It’s weird,” he lamented. “I can’t
eat, and I don’t need to, but man, do I want to. I miss
it.”

Before I could reply, Preston slowly
materialized.

“
How are you doing?” I
asked him.

Ernie snorted rudely. “How do you
think he’s doing? He’s as good as anyone would be if they were
buried in their work.” He cackled.

I shot him a glare and he
vanished.

“
Preston, are you sure it
was a man?” I asked the apparition.

“
I think so, but I can’t be
sure,” he said. “The hands were strong.”

I nodded. Anna was pretty strong. She
obviously worked out, and worked out hard. “Do you think two people
could have been involved?”

He shook his head, which was white and
transparent, barely formed. “It didn’t feel like it, if that makes
sense. I never saw them, but you can feel people. I only felt
one.”

I nodded. “One person, strong hands,
and probably, yet not necessarily, a man.”

“
I wish I could be more
help,” Preston said as he started to fade. “A part of me feels like
I’m missing something.”

“
Well, perhaps you are, and
perhaps it will come to you,” I said. “In the meantime, I have a
few people I want to look into.”

“
People you think could
have killed me?”

“
I would bet one of them
did,” I said confidently.

“
Who?”

“
I’m going to start with
the mayor’s wife,” I said to thin air, as Preston had already
vanished.

The sound of gospel music blaring
through the house alerted me to the fact that Susan was cleaning.
She liked to preach at me while she was cleaning, so I hurried out
the front door and went in search of Mom.

I found her in my office, sitting in
my chair behind the desk, staring at my laptop. “We need money,”
she said.

I bit my tongue. I wanted to say
something sarcastic, but I resisted the urge. I needed to humor her
so she would do what I wanted, so I simply nodded. “I’ve been
thinking of ways to get the business going again,” I
said.

Mom shut my laptop and looked at me.
“What did you come up with?”

“
I think we should invite
the mayor’s wife over for dinner.”

“
The mayor’s wife?
Helen?”

I nodded.

“
Why?”

The truth was I needed to ask the
mayor’s wife about her stolen jewels, and the man who had stolen
them. However, I needed something to pitch to my mother, so I
launched into my prepared speech. “Helen has good standing with
people in this town. If she says there’s nothing to worry about,
people will believe it. So we should have her over for
dinner.”

“
Helen goes to my church,”
my mother said.

“
I know, Mom, but it would
help to have her over for dinner.”

Mom seemed to be considering what I
was saying. “Okay. When?”

“
Tomorrow?” I said
hopefully. “Whenever suits her.”

Mom nodded. “All right. I’ll call
her.”

Chapter 10

“I’ll get it.” I hurried to the front
door. I opened it up, expecting to see the mayor’s wife, Helen, but
instead I found myself face to face with Ian.

“
Ian, no,” I
said.

He looked bewildered. “No?”

I gathered my wits. “Sorry, I meant to
say that we’re having someone over.”

Ian shot me a pitying look. “Of course
I know that, dear. Your Mom invited Helen, the mayor’s
wife.”

“
Mom told you? Mom invited
you over?” I was so shocked that I didn’t reprimand him for calling
me ‘dear’.

Ian nodded and stepped inside. “I
would think you would know by now that your mother and I have no
secrets.”

And that’s really weird
and creepy, so you need to stop being friends
, I thought. Aloud I said, “Mom’s in the kitchen.”

Ian sprinted for the kitchen as if the
devil himself were behind him. Perhaps he thought he was. By the
time I reached the kitchen, he had taken my place at the large
salad bowl, and was tossing the salad in a vinaigrette
dressing.

“
What can I do to help?” I
asked.

“
Nothing,” Mom said as she
put a dish into the oven. “You go and wait for Helen to
arrive.”

At precisely six thirty, the doorbell
rang again, and once more, I crossed to open the door.

“
Hi. Come on in,” I
said.

Helen smiled warmly at me. “I have to
say, it’s always my husband being invited place, and I’m just his
plus one. It was nice of you to think of me.”

Ian and my mother rushed into the room
and gushed all over Helen. “What would you like to drink?” Mom
asked her.

“
Red wine,
please.”

Mom gasped. “Helen, I must inform you
that I do not believe in wine. I signed the Temperance Pledge when
I was seven, and I have never let a drop of the Demon Alcohol pass
my lips.”

Helen appeared to be at a
loss.

“
Would you like something
else to drink?” I asked her, tempted to offer her my stash of wine
that Ian and Mom hadn’t so far found when rummaging through my
room.

“
What is there?” she asked
meekly.

“
I have delicious,
imitation, non-alcohol white wine,” my mom said smugly. “I bought
it earlier today just for you, Helen.”

“
Thank you. I would like a
glass of that, please,” Helen said.

“
Come into the dining
room,” Mom said. “Dinner is about to be served.”

Helen took her seat, while Mom
remained standing. She poured the fake wine into three glasses, and
handed a glass to Helen. Helen took a sip, coughed, and then set
her glass aside.

I wondered where Ian was, and why Mom
hadn’t poured him a glass of fake wine. I shrugged and sat next to
Helen, while my mother sat at the head of the table.

“
Laurel, why not sit across
from our guest?” Mom asked me, her lips pursed.

“
I thought Ian would be
sitting there,” I said.
And I don’t want
to sit next to him
, I added
silently.

“
Oh, Ian isn’t going to be
sitting! Why would you think such a thing?” my mother asked me.
“Ian serves us.”

I looked at her with my mouth open.
“You’re having Ian serve us?” I asked.

She narrowed her eyes at me. “Have you
taken leave of your senses, Laurel? It’s what he does, isn’t it?”
She looked nervously at Helen.

I was thoroughly confused by that
point. I started to catch on when Ian appeared with a tray loaded
with three salad bowls. He was wearing a black frilly apron and
maid’s cap.

Ian set a bowl in front of each of
us.