Nothing Denied (14 page)

He tilted his head and they kissed just as he began to lift into her. She met his strokes, grinding against him as the pleasure she had lost returned to her body with intensive, blinding speed. She tilted her head back with a cry as her entire body joined in the pleasure.

Final y he whispered, “Come, Beatrice. Give me your pleasure.”

Just as she feared, the permission was what her aching body needed. Instantly, the release she’d been reaching for mobbed her with pleasure so intense it was almost pain. She lost control of her body, her movements becoming wild as she rode Gareth’s cock with abandon. Yet he didn’t let her become total y lost. He held her, kissing her through the crisis and murmuring sweet words that blurred into her pleasure and made it al the better.

Final y, he tilted his head back, neck straining, body trembling. A few more rapid thrusts and he exploded, this time within her body, pumping heat and pleasure and strength into her in a splash of wet seed that only seemed to stimulate her further and take her to a new plane of pleasure and relief.

After what seemed like an eternity, the shivering, quaking pleasure ended, and Beatrice came back to reality. She remembered they were outside, arms and legs tangled, their sweaty foreheads gently pressed together and their breathing in tandem. Somehow she had forgotten that, forgotten everything else but him. She leaned back to look at him and felt something she had never expected when she began this bargain with him.

In some way she had bonded with him. And as much as she feared that, as much as she hated that she had completely given the control of her body’s pleasure to him…it also gave her a sense of peace.

And peace was not something Beatrice was accustomed to.

Chapter Ten

G
areth watched as Beatrice slowly shimmied her chemise over her head and smoothed the fabric over her skin. Just that simple act aroused him beyond reason, and he had the strong urge to lay her back across the grass and take al the pleasure and warmth he could from her pale flesh.

But he didn’t, because so much had changed in just a few hours. He had felt the shift as they made love, but the new understanding between them had been voiced perfectly when Beatrice admitted she needed his permission to find her orgasm. That was a powerful declaration from this woman who wanted to be in control of everything and would lash out if someone threatened her power.

Deeper than that, even, was the fact that he had spent his seed inside her sheath. He hadn’t planned that moment of abandon, it had simply happened natural y as they reveled in ultimate passion and release.

Stil , that one moment’s weakness changed everything. Gareth was many things, but he would not sire a bastard. There was a chance of a baby now, which sealed their future as a married couple even before he had ful y tested her ability to surrender to his lifestyle.

She faced him as she gathered up her dress from the grass and Gareth’s pleasant but confusing thoughts faded. He frowned as he saw the faint black stain of a bruise lashed across her arm. And it wasn’t a mark made from his passion. No, the grip of her attacker had done that.

An attacker who had come here because of
him
.

“My God, Beatrice,” he breathed as he reached out to trace the faint mark.

She glanced at the bruise and a shadow of fear crossed her face even though she said, “’Tis nothing. It wil be gone in a few days.”

He shook his head. “I owe you my deepest apologies for what you endured today. I have lived on this estate for many years. I am afraid my comfort with the place led me to be complacent. I never would have let you roam the estate alone if I had believed—”

To his surprise her normal y tense face softened. “Of course you wouldn’t. I don’t blame you for what happened today,” she soothed him.

Then she seemed to recognize how much emotion she was sharing, for she turned away abruptly. Without looking at him, she stepped into her gown and quickly fastened the buttons along the front. Keeping her back to him, she began to comb through her long blond hair with her fingers. It was a completely ordinary motion, but he recognized that it was her way of keeping him at arm’s length.

“When you approached the man who confronted me in the woods,” she said softly. “You seemed to recognize each other. Who was he?”

Gareth stiffened and finished buttoning his own shirt before he answered her perfectly legitimate question. He didn’t wish to share the truth, but after what had happened, he owed it to her. If she was being threatened, she deserved to know by whom.

And why.

He cleared his throat. “The man who attacked you was…he was my late wife’s brother.”

That stopped her from fussing with her hair. Slowly, she turned to face him and her skin had grown even more pale than normal.

“H–his threats,” she final y said after a long, uncomfortable pause. “He said he would do to me what you did to
her
. He meant his sister, didn’t he?

Your late wife.”

When he nodded, she shivered. He realized she was thinking of death. Worse, of murder. That ugly thing that had hung over him for years. The accusation Beatrice had never seemed to put much credence in, even from the first moment she met him. Perhaps she was the only one.

But now he saw doubt flicker in her stare, and he was taken aback by how much that doubt troubled him. He cleared his throat, and this time it was he who turned away so she wouldn’t see his reaction.

“Laurel’s family has been very angry with me since her death, and perhaps I deserve their wrath, for she is lost to them forever.”

He shook his head as he thought of how rabid Laurel’s brother, Adam, had looked when he had Beatrice in his sights. That memory inspired a protective rage in him that was almost overpowering. The idea that the man would take some kind of twisted vengeance on her…wel , it brought a veil of red fury down over Gareth’s eyes.

“I never thought he would go so far,” he murmured as he tried to control his emotions.

When she didn’t respond, Gareth turned to find Beatrice was stil standing in the same spot she had been when they began this conversation, but al her fluttering with clothing and hair had stopped. She simply stared at him, and perhaps for the first time she didn’t try to mask her perusal.

She clenched her hands in front of her and he could see they were shaking.

“I want to ask you a question,” she whispered, her voice breaking, and he prayed it wasn’t in terror. He nodded, for he knew what she was going to ask even before she continued.

“Gareth, did…
did
you kil your wife?”

He had been prepared for those words, but they hit him like a punch to the gut nonetheless. That question was the one that had haunted him for two long years. The worst part was he wasn’t certain of the answer. Some nights he felt like a murderer as he lay in his bed reliving the events of that horrible day Laurel’s life was snuffed out.

“Gareth…” she whispered when he didn’t answer. He paced away, not wanting to explain, to say out loud what he had done, what his wife had done and why. The why was the worst part…especial y for Beatrice.

“It’s more complicated than that,” he said.

She strode after him and caught his arm. When she tugged, he obliged her by turning to face her. Her blue eyes snapped with anger and worry and fear as she stared up at him.

“Then explain it to me,” she said.

He was surprised that for once the sharpness and accusation of her tone was not present. The hard edge Beatrice used as a shield had vanished, leaving her just a woman who wanted—no,
needed
—to know the truth.

“Gareth,” she whispered. “Someone attacked me today in the name of a woman I have no idea about beyond rumor and conjecture. And you and I are entered into a bargain that we have stated wil result in our marriage if we come to an agreement. The very least I deserve is to hear what happened to her. To Laurel.” She hesitated and he saw her jaw tighten.

“Please.”

Gareth drew back. If he had learned anything about the woman standing before him, it was that she didn’t
request
anything easily. Demand was more her style, so the fact that she had
asked
him to reveal the truth held a great deal of power to it.

He nodded. “Yes, you deserve that. To understand today’s events, I must go back to the beginning.”

Beatrice nodded silently.

He shook his head as memory assaulted him. “I–I saw Laurel across a room almost three years ago and in an instant I wanted her.”

Beatrice didn’t move, but Gareth thought he saw a muscle in her jaw twitch like she didn’t like to hear that. He ignored her indication of jealousy and continued.

“I made every effort to meet her. When I did, I fear I could not hide how much I wanted her, but my ardor didn’t seem to frighten her. I thought she wanted me just as much, for she al owed me to steal a most passionate kiss in the garden that night. It became clear to al that I wished to court her, but her family strenuously and vocal y objected to any match between us. We had long been neighbors, you see, and I think they had heard rumors of what I…” He arched a brow in Beatrice’s direction. “Wel , they probably believed I was somewhat of a libertine.”

She nodded and he could see she understood he was referring to the proclivities he possessed. “Stil , you married her regardless of their thoughts on the matter.”

“You probably noticed the attire of the man who attacked you—Adam is his name.” Gareth shrugged.

“Laurel’s family was in the beginnings of dire financial straits. Her brother Adam inherited a great amount of debt when their father died. And the young man was a drinker and a gambler, himself. I’m afraid I took advantage of those things in my quest to obtain what I desired. Soon, her family had no choice but to agree to a marriage contract, so Laurel and I were wed.”

Beatrice nodded. “I was never close to your wife, but I did vaguely know her during her coming-out year, which I believe was the year you wed. There was much mumbling and talk about your quick marriage.”

Gareth shook his head. “I knew our quick union caused some damage to her standing, but in truth I didn’t care. I was driven to possess her at al costs. Perhaps selfishly driven in more ways than one.”

He took a moment to draw breath and regain his composure. To his surprise, Beatrice did not attempt to interrupt or encourage him to continue. She simply waited with a patience he hadn’t realized she possessed.

Final y, he continued, “Right after the wedding, I brought her here, where we could spend the first months of our marriage in complete intimacy and privacy. At first, I thought al would be wel . Although she was timid with her affections, she seemed somewhat open to lessons in desire and passion. But after a few weeks, I wanted more.”

Beatrice watched him pace around the grassy area restlessly. “You wanted her to al ow you to dominate her. You wanted her utter surrender, just as you require mine.”

He nodded. “That is my nature when it comes to the bedroom, Beatrice. Without dominance, I soon bore of my partner. I did not wish to bore of my wife, so I asked her to give herself over to me. But she—”

He broke off as he thought of Laurel’s disgust the first time he showed her his private pleasure chamber. She had recoiled physical y and emotional y. Her voice had been so sharp when she declared she didn’t want that room just down the hal from where she slept and would one day raise children. He had tried to reason with her, but she had run away. For three long days she hadn’t so much as spoken to him.

He should have known then and let her go. But he hadn’t.

“It became more than evident that she didn’t want to share my life,” he finished with difficulty. “She couldn’t stand it, and she didn’t even want to try. After our first row on the subject, she would only lie as stil as a board in our bed, just bearing my hands on her. There was not even the pretense of enjoyment from her, no matter how patient or accommodating I was. And soon she would not even grant me the barest of intimacy. For months we did not sleep in the same bed and she flinched when I came near her.”

Beatrice moved forward a step, her unwavering stare focused on his face. “That is why you are so adamant about ‘testing’ me. That is why you said we must know if we are compatible before we wed.”

He nodded, pain mobbing him just as memory did. If only he had explained his needs to Laurel before they wed, perhaps al that had occurred later could have been avoided.

“But what happened to her, Gareth?” Beatrice asked, her voice hardly above a whisper. “What took you from a passionless marriage no different from many others in the
ton
to her untimely death?”

He swal owed hard. “I did not handle our situation with much finesse, I am afraid. I grew frustrated by her refusal to even try to make our marriage work. As the weeks and months went by, she locked herself away with increasing frequency. When we did speak, it was often to argue. She seemed to become more and more hysterical, even lashing out at me physical y from time to time.”

Beatrice’s eyes went wide with surprise, but she did not interrupt him.

“One night the fighting became unmanageable. Laurel was screaming down the house, despite the fact that I had a friend in residence, despite the fact that the servants and half the county could hear her rail against me.”

Beatrice winced and Gareth looked away. It was amazing how simply saying out loud al that had occurred could bring back the emotions of that horrible night.

“The more she went on, the angrier and more frustrated I became,” he mused, the clarity of his thoughts almost painful. “Final y, I snapped.”

A gasp escaped Beatrice’s lips and Gareth looked up at her with a start. He lifted his hands in mute entreaty for understanding and faith.

“I did not touch her, I swear to you! I simply reminded her that she owed me a child, an heir. That by keeping her body from me, she was stealing my legacy and I would not have it any longer.”

Beatrice’s face relaxed a fraction. “And how did she respond?”