Not the Marrying Kind (31 page)

“You’re not looking for a wife?” She seemed
genuinely puzzled.

“No, ma’am. I’m not the marrying kind,” he
said, stuffing the socks into the bag. “As for Kat, I didn’t
realize she was applying for the position of wife, and yes, I’ll be
gentle with her.” He grinned, thinking of their lovemaking the
previous day. He’d been gentle at first, breaking her in easy.
“Like taming an unbroken filly, you know.”

“A filly?” Lucille’s features scrunched up,
then she shrugged. “Whatever, yes, of course. I’m sure you’ll be
considerate with her feelings.”

“Now, Miss McIntyre, about those supplies.
How long before they’ll be ready?”

“Oh, my! I forgot all about them. Only a few
minutes, Mr. Barron.”

While he waited for her to gather the
supplies he needed, Joshua pondered everything Lucille had told
him. Damn, but folks around Sunset were a bunch of liars. Didn’t
anyone ever say what they meant?

Of course, come to think of it, he hadn’t
exactly been upfront with Kat about a lot of things either.

* * * *

On Thursday night, when Reverend Kendrick
arrived for dinner, Kat showed no hesitation to greet the man. She
approached him with a pleasant smile. For the first time since he’d
made his interest in her known, Kat reached out to link her arm
with his and escort him to the family dining room. From the
expression she saw on his face, Kat knew her little demonstration
of affection had delighted him.

“I’m so glad to see you, Reverend Kendrick,”
she said softly.

“I’m quite happy to see you, as well.”

“Do you suppose later we might have a chance
to speak privately?” Kat continued, giving him a tender smile.
“There’s something I’d like to discuss with you.”

“I think that could be arranged. I’m sure
your parents consider me a trustworthy gentleman,” he replied,
patting her hand. “I doubt they’d have any objection if we were to
sit together in the parlor.” He lifted her hand and brought it to
his lips. “I can’t tell you how pleased I am that you’ve accepted
my proposal, Katherine.” His lips felt cold and clammy as he
pressed them to the back of her hand.

It took all the patience she could muster to
not jerk her hand free. The touch of his lips made her shudder with
pure revulsion. “I believe Mama has dinner ready,” she said, eager
to step away from him and put an end to their touching little
scene.

“I’d much rather stay here with you,” he
whispered, squeezing her hand and pulling her closer. “I’m already
counting the days…no, counting the hours,” he amended, “until I can
take you as my wife.”

“How nice.” His ardor only strengthened her
resolve.

His hot breath brushed her cheek. “Perhaps
we should go in now, dear. It’s not wise for us to put ourselves in
such tempting circumstances before we’re wed.”

She nodded quickly. “You’re right, of
course. We shouldn’t allow ourselves to get too close.” Seizing
upon his words, she pulled away and went to stand a safe distance
from him, well out of arm’s reach.

“After you, Katherine.” He gestured toward
the door, and with a gracious smile she led him into the dining
room.

Throughout the meal, he smiled at her, he
complimented her, he praised her. Embarrassed by so much unwanted
attention, Kat barely ate a bite—a fact her father noted and
commented upon, chalking it up to nervous excitement.

“Am I right?” he asked.

Kat looked away.

“Nothing to be ashamed of, Katherine,” Mama
teased from across the table. “Every girl has a few little
butterflies before her wedding day.”

Finally, she lifted her chin and sucked in a
breath. “I’m sure that’s true. I think it would help calm me a bit
if I could have a moment or two alone with Reverend Kendrick. Would
you mind, Mama, if he and I take dessert together in the parlor?”
Hoping her request didn’t sound too bold, she glanced from one
parent to another, relieved when Mama nodded.

“I don’t see any problem with that.”

Her father drew in a sharp breath, but then
he, too, nodded in assent.

With permission granted, Kat’s anxieties
only increased, but she’d come too far to turn back now. She
thought again of Kendrick’s clammy kiss. Instinctively she rubbed
at the back of her hand, wanting to wipe away the unpleasant
memory. No way could she ever marry that man! She hated being
anywhere near him.

At last, dinner ended. Mama scooted Emily
Sue out the door, and Pa followed behind them, although with a
great show of reluctance. Kat had offered to serve the dessert
herself, so after seating her overzealous beau in the parlor, she
hurried into the kitchen.

With shaking hands, she sliced the fresh
apple pie Mama had baked. She gathered silverware and napkins,
poured two cups of coffee, arranged it all on a silver tray, and
headed toward the parlor. At each step, she looked around. Even
though Emily Sue had been much more respectful of late, Kat still
wouldn’t put it past her little sister to be snooping around
tonight. And this conversation would be one she would not want
anyone to overhear.

Kendrick jumped to his feet when she entered
the room. He rushed to assist her with the serving tray, but she
shook her head.

“Please, sit down.”

Quickly she served him his plate of pie and
cup of coffee, surprised by her own efficiency. In recent weeks,
she’d actually grown accustomed to wearing skirts and no longer
felt quite so clumsy and awkward. Over the past two days, she’d
come to see herself as a real woman. Her intimate experiences with
Joshua had changed her. Forever.

“Katherine, my heart flutters every time I
think of you.” Reverend Kendrick’s desires showed in his heated
face. He inched forward in his seat, leaning toward her. “We really
should set the date for our wedding, don’t you think?”

“That’s what I wanted to discuss with you.”
She cleared her throat, ready to begin, but Kendrick was out of his
seat, rushing toward her. He knelt at her knee and reached for her
hand.

“Katherine, dear, I will truly do all in my
power to make you happy, to care for you, and to honor you.”

Good thing he hadn’t mentioned love. Kat
would have been sick.

“Yes, well, first—”

“We can exchange our vows in mid-September.
Three months should give you sufficient time for any preparations.
I’ve already checked my calendar, and I’ve made arrangements with
Reverend Miller to officiate.”

“Without asking me?” The thought appalled
Kat. She had no intentions of going through with this marriage, yet
still it rankled her to think he’d take it upon himself to make
such important decisions without her agreement.

“I meant no offense, dear. You understand,
of course, that I will be the head of our household. I believe I
have the right to make decisions for both of us.”

She pressed her lips tightly together and
nodded, knowing she could not put off her confession a moment
longer.

“There’s something you need to know,
Reverend Kendrick.” Uncomfortable with the man groveling at her
knee, she rose and walked toward the window. She stared out, her
gaze searching the distant hillsides as she recalled those blissful
moments she’d spent there with Joshua. “I can’t marry you,” she
said, whirling around to gaze down upon the pathetic man. “I’m
not…” She hesitated, but the priceless look of dismay upon his long
face made her bold. “I’m not worthy to be your wife. I’ve sinned,
Reverend Kendrick. I’ve had carnal relations with another man.”

He pulled himself up from the floor. “It was
Barron, wasn’t it?” He drew near, his whole being now dark and
threatening. “You don’t have to say a word. I know it was him.”
Kendrick shook his head, breathing slowly and deeply. “If you’ll
recall, Katherine, I warned you about that man. I told you to stay
away from him.”

“Yes, but—”

He had no interest in anything she might
say, Kat realized, as he clasped his hands behind his back and
paced the little parlor.

“We’ll have to move the wedding up, of
course. For all we know, Katherine, you could be with child, and we
certainly want to avoid any scandal.”

“I can’t—”

A calendar sampler hung on the wall, and
Kendrick rushed toward it. He ran a bony finger down across the
neat embroidery. “The sixth of July,” he said, nodding as he jabbed
at the date. “We’ll marry then. It’s only a few weeks away, so
we’ll have to hurry. I’ll contact Reverend Miller immediately and
make the necessary arrangements.” He stopped pacing, came to her,
and placed a hand on her shoulder. “I forgive you, Katherine. I
trust you’ve asked the Lord’s forgiveness, as well? We’ll pray
together now.” He took her hands in his. Too stunned to resist,
Katherine bowed her head as he entreated God to show mercy and
compassion for the sins she had committed. “We implore you, too,
Heavenly Father, to punish those who have spread corruption and sin
upon this land, those who have led the innocent astray.” He smiled
and squeezed her hands. “Trust me, Katherine, he will be punished
for what he’s done to you.”

Too late, Kat realized the awful
implications of what she had done. By confessing her sins, she’d
marked Joshua as a sinner, as well. Even though she’d not mentioned
him by name, the truth was all too clear.

“No,” she said gripping Kendrick’s arm.
“You’re not going to confront him, are you?” Joshua would despise
her if he knew of her indiscretion. Shame washed over her, not a
shame for the intimacy she’d known with Joshua, but a deep, burning
shame for having confessed it, for putting a stain on Joshua
Barron’s good name.

She’d been desperate. Kat consoled herself
with that fact, but it did little to ease her conscience.

“No, dear, I won’t confront the man.”
Kendrick frowned and shook his head. “You must never mention this
to anyone, do you understand? For the sake of your good name,
neither of us is to ever discuss this matter again.” He glanced
toward the door. “Your parents…?”

“They have no idea, of course.”

“Thank the Lord.” He looked weak, shaken,
and ready to crumble. “It’s going to be all right, Katherine.” He
put his arms around her and drew her to him. “I promise you,
everything will be all right.”

* * * *

The knocking at Kat’s door—quiet, but
insistent—alarmed her. It sounded furtive, secretive, and given the
events of the evening, altogether frightening. Had Mama somehow
learned of her confession? Or worse still, had Pa gotten word of
her sins?

“Kat, please wake up. Please, open the
door.”

Emily Sue’s voice set Kat’s mind somewhat at
ease, and yet in the next breath, worried her all the more. God
forbid her little sister had been listening earlier! How would Kat
ever explain such a delicate situation to a child of twelve?

She flung the bedcovers aside and tip-toed
to answer the door.

Emily quickly slipped inside and pushed the
door closed behind her. She held a finger to her lips, indicating a
need for silence. Kat nodded.

“I have something to tell you. You’re not
going to believe this.” Emily looked up, her eyes glistening with
tears. “He’s been lying to you, Kat.”

“Who?”

“Pa! He’s been lying to all of us. Even
Mama.”

“About what?”

“He’s already sold the ranch. He told Mama
everything while ago.”

Kat’s mind whirred, unsure what to make of
Emily’s news. “We knew he planned to sell the place. It shouldn’t
come as much of a surprise to any of us.” A surprise, no, but the
announcement added to Kat’s misery. How many more disappointments
could she endure? She blinked back tears. “I don’t like it,” she
assured her little sister, “but there’s nothing I can do about it.
There’s nothing anybody can do.” She hugged Emily. “Besides, I
thought you wanted to live in town.”

Emily nodded. “Yeah, I do. It will be nice,
I think, being close to the stores, close to my friends. But, Kat,
isn’t it a sin to tell a lie?”

“Yes, I suppose it is. Most of the time,
anyway.” She thought at once of all the lies she’d told lately. “I
think maybe it depends on the reason, you know. I mean, if a lie is
meant to hurt someone, it’s a sin, but if there’s a good reason for
it, maybe it’s all right. At least,” she added hastily, “maybe God
will understand. Maybe He’ll be more willing to forgive it.” She
turned the information over in her mind again. “Besides, I don’t
see where Pa has really told any lies,” she pointed out. “Like I
said, he told us he was going to sell the ranch, and now, he has.
He’s probably planning to break the news to us tomorrow.”

It didn’t fit together, come to think of it.
When and how would Pa have made the deal to sell the Rocking P?
Nobody had come calling recently except Reverend Kendrick. He
wouldn’t have bought the place, that much was certain. Pa hadn’t
been in to town either.

Emily shook her head. “He sold it weeks ago,
Kat.”

“Are you sure?”

“He’s been keeping it from all of us. Even
Mama.”

“Are you sure you heard him right? What did
he say, exactly? Did he mention any names?”

Emily bit her lip. “Not that I got to hear.
Mama caught me listening, and she paddled me for it. She sent me
upstairs. If she catches me in here talking to you about it, she’ll
be real mad.”

“You’d better get back to your room.” She
nudged her little sister to her feet. “I’ll do a little looking
around. There’s got to be some paperwork on the deal. While Pa’s
napping tomorrow afternoon, I’ll check his office.” It would be a
nice distraction, a way of taking her mind off the horrors of her
upcoming nuptials. “Now, scoot. If Mama finds you here, we’ll both
be in trouble.”

* * * *

Pa didn’t feel like napping the next day. It
was only after Kat suggested the idea to him three times that he
finally agreed a bit of rest would do him good. Thoughtful daughter
that she was, she even helped him to his room. As soon as he closed
the door behind him, she turned and raced toward his office. No
telling how long he’d sleep. Sometimes he napped for hours. Other
days, he was up and about after no more than fifteen or twenty
minutes. She had no time to waste.