Never Surrender (9 page)

“I would never allow you to touch me,” she snapped.

“So you’ve stated on more than one occasion,” Taima
seethed through clenched teeth.

He grasped Kate’s upper arms and pulled her against
his chest. There, alone in the dark next to the purling river, his head dipped
and his mouth tasted hers. Though she struggled to get free, his tongue quickly
slipped past her lips to sweep the sensitive flesh of her mouth, and she
stopped fighting. Taima deepened the kiss as he sensed her surrender. Her lips
softened and her tongue timidly danced with his for a moment.

Suddenly, the tender lips beneath his own grew taut.
Kate tried to scream, but it came out muffled and died in her mouth. Taima
released her and pushed her back a step.

“You bastard!”

Taima caught her small wrist in mid-air before her
palm connected with his cheek again. He spoke slowly to calm himself. “Why can
you not face the fact that I will not release you into the wilderness alone?
I’ll not have your death on my conscience.” He dropped her wrist.

Crickets chirped above the sound of the gurgling Wind
River, combined with her rapid breathing. With her lips parted, Kate stared at
him. Taima wished it were light enough for him to see the brilliant green of
her eyes.

“Am I to continue sleeping in your lean-to?” Bleak
resolve toward her plight edged into her voice. Had she finally accepted her
confinement?

“Yes. You and Kelee will be fine in my lean-to. I will
sleep elsewhere.”

A moment of silence fell between them. Her chest rose
with every breath, making him even more aware of the affect she had on him.

“Just because Kelee needs a mother-figure doesn’t mean
he’s forgotten the one he had,” Kate said.

Taima stepped around her to walk farther down river.
“I’m not sure
I
am ready to replace her.”

His moccasins dug into the dirt as he walked away.
Kate always seemed to have a way of making him blurt out his thoughts. He
leaned forward against a waist-high boulder.

“Your wife would not have wanted you to remain alone
any more than you would have wanted her to should your situation be reversed.
There must be a woman among your people who has caught your attention and
snared your heart; someone Kelee has feelings for,” Kate said and leaned
against the same boulder.

A gentle breeze carried her light, musky scent to his
nose, then he glanced in her direction. The fullness of her lips reminded him
of their softness against his own. Her green eyes appeared almost caring in the
moonlight.

“There is someone, but our differences are more than
either of us can deal with right now,” Taima said.

He looked ahead at the mountain’s jagged outline
against the twinkling night sky. Kate would never put aside her stubborn temper
to admit she actually had any feelings for him. Her tender reaction to his kiss
only minutes ago revealed that much to him. He remembered the silkiness of her
hair between his fingers, the softness of her breasts against his chest, the
surrender of her body as he kissed her. Perhaps she was right--perhaps he did
need a woman for himself and Kelee.

Witashnah’s image floated through his mind, her long,
dark hair trailing behind her, a loving smile on her lips. It was true; she
would not want him to be alone for the rest of his life.

“For Kelee’s sake, if not your own, you need to deal
with this. Make that woman see Kelee’s needs,” Kate pleaded.

Without looking at her, Taima replied, “She’s well
aware of Kelee’s needs, just not concerned with mine, but...my needs are
unimportant at this point.”

He refused to look at her. Kate hated him, yet
pretended concern. How could her feelings change so often?

Taima sighed. “It is time you returned to camp.”

From the corner of his eye, he noted she watched him
for a moment before speaking. “I can sleep elsewhere. You and Kelee may have
your lean-to.”

“You will sleep in my lean-to,” he said, hoping she
would spare him the argument, “Kelee asked to stay with Ahanu’s son tonight.”

Without another word, she strode away.

* * * * *

Kate rolled her eyes as she turned from Taima. If
there was a woman among his people who interested him, why did he continue to
kiss her?

She touched her lips, still swollen from his savage
touch. The memory of Taima’s tongue sweeping her inner mouth evoked tingling
sensations throughout her body. His deep, sensual kiss had affected her more
than the one days ago, though both were meant to punish her. Weak knees had
barely supported her as he drew her body against his before she had come to her
senses and stepped away from him.

How could her knees weaken and her heart race when she
hated Taima for keeping her against her will? Kate denied having any other
feelings besides an intense dislike for Taima. Antagonizing her daily seemed to
please him more than it should and that alone irritated her. Like now, ordering
her back to his lean-to rather than allowing her to stay with Ahanu. Not that
she wanted to be near Aiyana. But which was worse? She wouldn’t rest peacefully
at either place.

A young woman standing outside a lean-to watched Kate
as she walked past. Her eerie, dark eyes sent a tremor down Kate’s spine. Could
this woman hate her for occupying so much of Taima’s attention? Before Kate
stepped behind the buffalo hide at Taima’s lean-to, she glanced back at the
slender woman and briefly met her gaze. Even in the dark, Kate detected a
hateful glare. The woman refused to look away, and the longer they stared at
one another, the more Kate felt the hatred stab like poison darts into her
skin.

Jealousy rose in Kate’s heart. She certainly didn’t
want Taima for herself, so why this new emotion? She couldn’t care less if he
wanted another woman.

Kate looked away and stepped inside her dark prison.
If she disliked Taima as much as she kept telling herself, his kiss should not
have affected her the way it had. Damn him! Angry with herself, angry with
Taima, she spread out the buffalo hide away from the door, grabbed her blanket,
and stretched out. Kelee should be with his father, not with Ahanu’s family all
the time. Her thoughts weren’t on going to sleep, but on whether she’d be
sleeping alone. Taima had said he’d sleep elsewhere, but did he mean it?

A flash of lightening dimly lit the interior of the
lean-to, and several seconds later a crack of thunder sounded. Kate pulled her
blanket to her chin, her head resting on a roll of bunched-up hide. Deep,
rumbling noises in the distance spoke of the approaching storm. Now she could
smell the rain in the wind. Minutes later, another flash of lightning
brightened the interior, followed almost instantly by thunder. The storms moved
quickly in these parts. She listened. Rain began to pelt against the thatched
roof.

Kate thought about Taima sleeping beneath the stars,
out in the rain. Guilt filled her, and she squeezed her eyes shut to ward off
the feeling. Taima roamed somewhere beyond the dry interior of his lean-to, likely
getting soaked because she refused to allow him to sleep inside with her. But
he didn’t deserve better; all of this was his fault. He should have just left
her at the attack and rode off with Ahanu that day.

The hide covering the door whipped open as lightning
flashed again, illuminating Taima’s rain-drenched body in the doorway.

Kate gasped.

He stepped in and dropped the flap.

Darkness closed around them.

Taima stood in the doorway of the lean-to, his
narrowed eyes glistening in the dark. “I won’t sleep in the rain just to avoid
you.”

His deep voice cut through the darkness to carve into
her heart. Upset with herself that she’d allowed Taima to affect her so, an
exhaled moan of disgust escaped Kate’s throat. “If you’d hurry up and get that
other woman’s attention, you wouldn’t need to sleep in the rain,” she said and
rolled over, giving Taima her back and yanking the blanket to her chin. She’d
be fine as long as he didn’t come near her. If he touched her, she knew she’d
melt.

Inky blackness surrounded her as she lay still,
wondering if Taima had lain down or if he stared at her back? She didn’t care.
And neither would she care who the Indian woman was who had captured Taima’s
interest. The sooner he got involved with that woman, the quicker he would
leave her alone.

Kate weighed the possibility of this other woman being
quiet and subservient, the opposite of herself. How could Taima ever enjoy the
company of someone who accepted his word as law and never argued back; who
never met his gaze to challenge the man? Her mind envisioned Taima and the
faceless female enjoying a caress, a touch to a cheek, a deep, sensual kiss
that would be felt to one’s toes. She arched her back at such a visual image.

Kate squeezed her knees together and pulled them level
with her hips. Why would she care if he caressed another woman? After all, his
touch did nothing to her, or at least she tried to convince herself of that;
yet the memory of tonight’s kiss came rushing back, haunting her whenever she
closed her eyes. The muscles of her stomach knotted, and she pressed her
fingers to her lips, remembering his kiss.

She hated Taima; he was brutal, not tender the way a
lover would be. Kate closed her eyes, yet a crystal blue gaze glared back at
her from a handsome, rugged face. Pain stabbed at her heart, but she refused to
admit her true emotions.

Would she feel this loneliness the rest of her days? A
tear slipped from between her closed lids before she drifted into a fitful
sleep.

* * * * *

Fresh air swirled about the interior of the lean-to
and Kate rolled onto her back, drawing in a deep breath. She stretched her arms
overhead and pointed her toes. Leisurely, she rolled her head from side to
side, stretching her neck. The hide at the door continued to swing in the
breeze. But the hide where Taima had slept lay empty.

Kate stepped outside and glanced at the surrounding
mountain peaks. The cool morning air sent shivers over her flesh, and she
rubbed her arms. No wonder the snow still collected atop the mountains.

Taima’s people scurried about, working together to
pack their belongings. Travois had been attached to the horses and were already
loaded with several parfleches. Aiyana tied leather straps to hold her bundles
onto the center rawhide netting.

Looking amongst the scurrying people, Kate could not
spot Taima.

“Tie our hides together and pack everything else in
the pouches. We leave today for the hot springs,” Taima said from behind her,
causing her to jump. He handed her a hard biscuit and two pieces of dried meat.
“We’ll not wait if you’re not ready,” he warned, then walked toward the horses
with a pack slung over his shoulder.

Kate tore a chunk of meat off with her teeth as she
stared at Taima’s back. Another command, she huffed. Could he not ask her to do
something rather than issue an order? Chewing the tough meat only spurred her
agitation.

Kate watched Ahanu secure the travois and wondered
about the closeness of his friendship with Taima. The two were nearly
inseparable. At that moment, he turned and met her gaze, as though he knew she
watched him, then he looked at Taima who approached him. Ahanu smiled and shook
his head. Kate rolled her eyes and stepped back into the lean-to to gather
their belongings. Ahanu’s gaze had spoke volumes when she, too, approached him.
She shook her head and laughed. It didn’t hurt so bad, realizing he enjoyed
taunting Taima, as well.

Once packed, the pouches weighed more than Kate had
anticipated, but she struggled to carry them toward the horses. Two trips would
be necessary, yet she refused to ask Taima for any help. It infuriated her that
he hadn’t returned to see if she had needed him. He likely could have carried
all of them at once, saving her the effort. Exhaling a grunt, she dropped the
pouches next to the horses.

“You will make a good wife,” Aiyana stated, then
giggled. “Taima needs someone like you. And you are good with Kelee. He enjoys
your company.”

“Unlike his father,” Kate replied with a snort.
“Thanks, but no thanks.”

Aiyana glanced around, then stepped closer. “Listen to
your heart...Kelee needs you.”

Her sudden friendliness stunned Kate.

She walked away before Kate could realize the impact
of her words. Kelee was a special child, Kate already knew that. He’d found his
way into her heart, past the wall she’d erected against such intrusions.
Grudgingly, she admitted, so had his father.

Mulling over Aiyana’s words, Kate watched the children
play beyond the lean-tos and heard their laughter drift on the wind. Kelee
chased Ahanu’s daughter and two other girls, giggling as they ran away from
him.

Confused, Kate turned to retrieve the bundle of hides
at the lean-to. She couldn’t understand Aiyana’s change in attitude toward her.
First the woman wanted her dead, now she wanted her to be Kelee’s mother; and
worse yet, Taima’s wife. That would never happen, she promised.

The bundle of hides was wider than Kate’s arms could
reach around, so she dug her fingers into the furs, hoping she’d make it to the
horses without dropping it. After a few steps, she had to stop and nudge the
bundle up higher with her knee, then lean back so it wouldn’t slip again.

Suddenly, Taima’s face appeared over the top of the
bundle. He reached around the package, mistakenly grabbing her waist in an
attempt to take the burden of hides from her. As she held tight to her bundle,
the ridges of Taima’s stomach pressed through the leather of his shirt and
against the backs of her hands, scorching her.

Their lips were mere inches apart; their noses nearly
touched; she met his gaze. His warm breath fanned her cheek. His eyes were such
a startling blue, like the sky on a clear day.

His lips parted, and she moistened her own before
realizing what she’d done. Kate prayed he wouldn’t kiss her in front of his
people.

“This bundle is as big as you are. I’ll carry it.”

She refused to let go. “I can do it! Where were you
when I needed help with the pouches?”

“You can’t possibly carry this all the way to the
horses. Give it to me,” he demanded.

Kate stared into the blue of his eyes. “No!” She tried
to jerk it away a second time, then realized her mistake.

She’d done it again.

A vein visibly throbbed at Taima’s temple.

Lines formed between his eyebrows, accenting the
vicious look in his eyes. Kate’s heart began beating erratically; her breath
caught in her throat. She quickly released the bundle and stepped away.

“Damn you, White Woman. Why can’t you ever listen?” he
seethed through clenched teeth, loud enough for only her to hear.

She lowered her gaze and quickly stepped around him,
hurrying toward Ahanu.

“You enjoy bringing out his fire, don’t you?” Ahanu
asked quietly before Taima reached them.

“Why can’t he just leave me be? He torments me on
purpose.” She peered over her shoulder to see how close Taima was. “Make him
leave me alone.”

“It’s hard to make Taima stop doing something he
enjoys. And he enjoys tormenting you,” Ahanu chuckled.

Kate raised an eyebrow, wanting more of an
explanation, but Taima had joined them. He eyed her and Ahanu, then strapped
the hides to the travois.

A short time later, Kate walked with the small group
headed for the hot springs. Aiyana walked silently beside her. Taima was never
far from her. Did he actually think she’d run away when anyone could easily
catch her?

The full day’s journey would likely prove tiresome,
but she looked forward to seeing this strange place they talked of. She’d never
seen steam rising from hot springs, nor hot water shooting into the sky from a
geyser.

Taima and his people appeared fearful of this area
where their spirit gods lived, yet she wanted to experience the warm water and
touch the heated ground.

“Aiyana, do you and the others bathe in the warm
waters?” Kate asked.

“Not where we leave our offerings for the Great
Spirit, it would bring bad luck, but there are areas we do.”

“You leave offerings for them?”

“Yes. We leave moccasins to protect their feet against
the burning rocks, and soft leather clothing to protect them from the cold
nights. Some leave special gifts in hopes their prayers might be answered.”

Kelee ran up and tugged on Kate’s dress. “Look what I
made; Aiyana helped me.”

Kelee placed an object in her hands. Twigs had been
secured to make three circles, each connecting to the other. Wide grass wrapped
each twig and three small gray feathers were attached to its center.

“You did a beautiful job, Kelee”

“I’m going to leave it with the Great Spirit and pray
that the three of us will become a family, then we’ll be joined just like the
circles.”

Kelee’s innocent comment caused Taima to turn in their
direction. He stared at her, then Kelee. Excited, the boy ran up to walk with
his father.

Taima picked Kelee up into his arms. “Look, Noshi. See
what Aiyana helped me make. The Great Spirit will join Kate with us, just like
these circles, forever. I know this, for I pray for it every night. Don’t you?”

Kate watched Kelee’s trusting blue eyes as they waited
for his father to answer. A tender smile spread upon the child’s face.

Taima brushed the hair from Kelee’s cheek. “My prayers
are different than yours, Nechan. I only pray for your happiness.”

“We will be happy, soon. I know it,” Kelee announced,
then wiggled to be released. He ran toward a group of his friends, carefully
carrying his offering.

Taima turned briefly to meet Kate’s gaze then slowly
took in the length of her body. Her cheeks heated with embarrassment. When his
gaze returned to her face, she lowered her lashes before he could read her
reaction. Little Kelee had meant no harm. All children wanted their families to
be happy. Kate only wished Kelee knew of the other woman who had caught Taima’s
eye so he could befriend this woman instead of her. She would be the one to
help make theirs a happy family.

Aiyana gently squeezed Kate’s hand. An act of
friendship which startled her. A gracious smile reached Aiyana’s almond-shaped
eyes this time. The caring message touched Kate’s heart. She gave the woman’s
delicate fingers a squeeze of friendship.

Kate pulled her hand away and said, “First you try to
kill me, now you offer me your friendship. I don’t understand.”

Aiyana glanced toward Taima, then met Kate’s gaze with
a child-like smile and scrunched her nose. “It was all for his benefit. Ever
since I tried to cut your throat, Taima hasn’t let you out of his sight. He
treated my sister the same as he now treats you, though I don’t think he
realizes it. But Ahanu does, and he has reminded me.”

“I don’t understand. Taima hated your sister?”

“No, no. But they used to argue all the time, too. An
Indian woman does not look into the eyes of the men of her tribe, though
Witashnah did. She challenged Taima at every step, yet their love ran deep for
each other.”

Kate stared at Taima’s broad back as she spoke
quietly. “But you’ve guessed wrong where Taima and I are concerned. There is no
love between us. We hate each other and have both admitted it.”

Aiyana shook her head. “There is no hate, only a
refusal to see the truth. When you admit it and listen to your heart, only then
will you be truly happy.”

Aiyana spoke behind her hand. “Do not fret over it.
Pay attention to the way he watches you when he thinks no one else sees. He is
yet like a little boy.”

Kate rolled her eyes. “Ha! Taima, a little boy?”

“Yes. He teases you like boys tease the girls they
like, as do our children here.”

“He told me last night there is a woman who interests
him, but she cares not about his feelings, only Kelee’s. You need to help him
get through to this woman, whoever she is, because she is who Taima truly
wants.”

Her new-found friend laughed and shook her head.

Kate scrutinized her features for clues as she
adjusted her stride to the land’s incline. “You know this woman?”

Aiyana looked at her from the corner of her eye and
smiled again. “I will not answer any more questions about this.” Aiyana’s
fingers tapped her chest over her heart. “You need to listen here.” She stared
ahead then and walked on in silence.