Never Forget (Memories) (10 page)

I bring my legs up and kick him playfully. He grabs them, setting them on his lap. He examines my slippers.

''Bunny slippers?''

''Hey, they're comfy, don't judge.'' I glare at him and he holds his hands up.

''No judging, Princess. They're cute, a bit like you.''

''Cute? Alec, I don't think I've ever been called cute in my whole life.''

''Bet no one called you Princess till you met me either, did they?''

''No...''

''Then I'm the first.'' He winks.

The first for more than you know, it appears.

He gives me a look like he knows what I'm thinking and turns his attention to the TV.

''So..'' I say in an attempt to break the silence.

''So your Gram is pretty set on the idea of me and you.''

His comment takes me by surprise.

''Yeah, seems that way.''

''She ain't the only one,'' I think he mutters, but I can't be sure.

I think it's best to drop that subject before we reach uncharted territory. I'm so not ready for that conversation when I'm not even sure how I feel.

Sure, he makes my body go crazy, my heart goes into overdrive whenever he's around but I need more. I need to know with every part of me that what I feel is more than attraction.

But, if he keeps rubbing my leg that way, the attraction might just take over and jump on him.

The opening credits for TOWIE come on and pull me from my thoughts. Good.

I don't like the direction they're heading.

We watch it in a comfortable silence, my legs still sitting in his lap, his fingers tracing lazy circles on my thigh.

''I better head home,'' he says softly and looks into my eyes. I'm almost asleep, my head resting against the back of the sofa, close to his shoulder. I nod sleepily.

''Did you come here just to watch TOWIE with me?'' I ask.

''No.'' He picks up a piece of my hair and fingers it. ''I came here just to see you.''

My lips curl upwards before I can stop them, and something inside my chest blooms. I yawn.

''Go to bed, Princess.'' He runs a finger down my cheek. ''You need to get some sleep.''

I nod again and smile at him. He sighs and wraps an arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer to him. My head rests on his shoulder and his other arm snakes around me. I'm encased in his arms, and I don't care.

Fighting it seems futile in my half-sleeping state. One of my arms stretches across his body and he presses his face into the crook of my neck.

''What are you doing to me, Princess?'' he whispers softly and kisses my neck.

I shiver and close my eyes.

A part of me could stay here in his arms, forever. A part of me that's steadily growing.

''Driving you crazy?'' I offer lazily.

''Mmm,'' he agrees. ''Something like that.''

I smile against his skin and he holds me tighter for a second.

''Am I doing well with proving to you I'm not what you think?''

''Not bad,'' I whisper in a rare moment of softness. ''You're getting there.''

''You're hard to understand, you know that?'' He whispers back. ''I never seem to know what you're thinking, and it drives me mad.''

''Keeps you coming back for more, though.'' I yawn again.

''You don't need to do that to keep me coming back. You really do need to go to bed. Come here.'' He moves and helps me stand. I rub at my eyes and open the front door.

''I had a nice evening.'' I smile up at him.

''Me too,'' he whispers and stops right in front of me.

My breath catches as his eyes meet mine. He raises a hand to my face and strokes my cheek with his thumb. It's like I'm frozen in place.

I want him to kiss me.

No, I don't.

Yes, I do.

''Get your hands off my sister, boy,'' Bing jokes and slaps Alec's shoulder. ''She bites, ya know.''

Alec drops his hand and laughs. I punch my brother's arm as he passes me. He runs backwards up the stairs and pokes his tongue out. I smirk at him. He's such an idiot.

''I want you in bed in two minutes, young lady,'' Bing imitates Dad's voice from the top of the stairs.

''Get lost,'' I shout through my laughter at him.

''My thoughts exactly, Lexy!'' I hear Dad call down.

I put my face in my hands and laugh. Crazy, crazy family.

Alec is smiling at me when I drop my hands.

''I'll leave you to it before your brother beats me,'' he chuckles softly.

''Probably best,'' I agree.

He steps outside then turns back to me.

''Princess?''

''Hm?'' I look at him absently.

''I'm ready when you are.'' He walks backwards to his Jeep and I watch him go.

I don't know what else to do.

ALEC

I'm undecided if there's anything cuter than Alexis Edwards, city girl extraordinaire in Snoopy pyjamas. Really. Especially when the bottoms are flowery, and there's bunny slippers on her feet.

Yep. She's done something to my brain alright.

I smirk at my thoughts as I drive away, remembering how close I came to kissing her tonight. Again. But it's always close, never quite there.

Why? There's nothing I want more than to hold her head still with her lips against mine and let her feel how much I want her. I'm starting to lose my patience with myself.

I have to kiss this girl.

Preferably sometime last week.

Mum's pottering around the kitchen when I get back, still dressed in her clothes from the day. It doesn't phase me anymore, it's just a part of life. Cleaning is her therapy, what surfing is to me.

''So, who is she?'' Mum turns her bright blue, knowing eyes on me.

''What do you mean?''

''The girl that's got you all in a tizzy flap. I never thought it would happen, but it looks like it has.''

She sees far too much that should be kept invisible.

''Who says there's a girl?''

She barks out a laugh and pats my shoulder. ''Oh, honey. No one needs to say it. You've got stars in your eyes so bright they might as well be a galaxy. So, tell Mummy, who is she?''

I smile at her choice of words. ''Well, Mummy, dearest.'' I chuckle. ''There might be a girl.''

''Ain't no might about it, Alec Johnson. Spit it out.''

I mock salute her and she flicks her cloth at me.

''She's called Lexy-''

''And she's Vi's granddaughter.'' Mum snickers. ''Good on that woman. I always knew she was a sneaky old girl. Her granddaughter will do you some good.''

''Gee, thanks, Mum.''

''I'm just sayin', son. You play the field too much. Have ever since..'' She trails off and I sigh.

''I know. I just.. I had to deal with it in my own way – as fucked up as that way was.''

''Was?'' She raises her eyebrows and I say nothing. ''You're too much like him, and you know what?'' She smiles slyly. ''All he needed was a good girl to settle down with. Just like you do.''

''I'm only nineteen.''

''And? You think you can't find 'The One' at nineteen? I fell in love with your father when I was sixteen. Never loved another, and I never will.''

''You don't think you'll ever move on, Mum? Meet someone else?''

''Oh no, son. Your father is my heart and even in death, he still holds it. I'd never take it back. I don't want it back. Besides, half of it lives in you, and what good to me is a broken heart?''

I stand and walk around the table to her. I hug her softly and she rests her head on my shoulder.

''Don't hold back, Alec. You never know how much time you have with someone and before you know it, it's gonna be too late to tell her how you feel.''

''I don't even know how I feel,'' I say quietly.

''Oh, you do. You just haven't figured it out yet, that's all. Away with ya now, let me finish cleaning up here.'' She wriggles from me and I roll my eyes. ''Don't roll your eyes, Alec.''

''Yes, Mum.'' I laugh and make my way through the kitchen.

''Oh, and Alec?'' she calls after me. ''Bring her over for dinner. I wanna meet her, make sure she's good enough for my boy.'' She winks.

''I will. And she is good enough, she's too good. You'll see that when you meet her.'' For some reason, the thought of Lexy meeting my Mum makes me grin like a lunatic. I don't do the whole 'bringing girls home' bit, so this should be...

Interesting.

~

ALEXIS

''What do you mean, you have nothing to wear?''

''I mean I didn't pack for partying.''

Jen spins around and points her hairbrush at me. ''The city girl doesn't have anything to wear on a night out?''

''Of course I do.'' I sigh. ''They're just all at home, in London. I wasn't expecting to meet up with you again!''

''Well.'' She starts brushing her hair. ''We'll just head into Barnstaple. You should be able to find something there.''

''How will we get there?''

''Bus.'' She shrugs. ''There's a stop right by Cara's Café, it'll take us right into the bus station.''

''Okay,'' I say. ''Let's go. When's the next bus?''

Jen checks her phone for the time. ''In about fifteen minutes. If we go now, we'll make it.''

''Sorted.'' I smile and grab my bag. She grabs hers and we leave.

''How are the wedding plans coming?'' I ask her at bus stop.

''Oh my god, do not even mention that damn wedding to me!'' She huffs. ''You think you've seen Bridezilla? Well, nuh-uh.'' She shakes her head vehemently. ''You ain't met Bridezilla until you've met Hannah.''

I grimace slightly. ''That bad?''

''Mmhmm. The roses are wrong, the centrepieces aren't even, what if no-one turns up? What if he doesn't show?'' Jen nearly growls in frustration.

I smile, amused at her tirade. I remember what it's like – when my cousin got married back in February she was an absolute demon.

The bus arrives and we get on and pay our fares. We laugh and joke the whole way into Barnstaple. I find myself looking forward to my birthday with Jen and the guys. Back in London it would have just been a normal weekend, but here?

Here it's something different because they don't do it often, living so far out of town.

''I like this.'' Jen holds up a black, one shoulder dress. It's plain and simple.

''Hmm.'' I finger the gauzy material at the shoulder. ''In the basket. I'll try it on.'' We grin and she puts it in my basket.

''So...'' she begins discreetly, fingering some clothes. ''You and Alec..?''

I muffle my groan. ''I don't know.''

''You're getting there, though?'' She glances at me. ''Like, trusting him.''

''I don't know, Jen.'' I sigh. ''I don't know if I know how to trust him. I do want to, but I don't know if I can.''

''Carl used to be just like Alec, you know.''

''Really?'' I look over at her, surprise splashed across my face.

She nods and holds a top up against her in the mirror. ''It took him ages to convince me to give him a chance. It was a bit rocky at first, but then I realised that he really did only have eyes for me. That was nearly two years ago.'' She puts the top in her basket. ''He looks at other girls – I'm not stupid – but I know that's all he is doing. It's still me he's coming to at the end of the day, and while I know he used to be a bit of a get around, he's completely faithful to me.''

I nod slightly.

''Just like Alec would be to you, if you'd let him,'' she adds.

''I don't know..''

''I do,'' she says firmly. ''I see the way he looks at you, Lexy, and I know I'm a bit crazy with my words sometimes, but he actually would do anything for a chance to prove to you he's worth a shot.''

''I already said I'd give him a chance-''

''But are you?'' She turns and pins me with her blue eyes. ''Are you letting him show you, or are you still trying to control it? Letting yourself see what you want to see? You can't control everything, and matters of the heart are one of those things. The heart wants what the heart wants and you gotta let it have it. Everyone will get hurt at some point, but don't think about that. Think about now. Think about the crazy way he makes you feel right now, cause I know he does make you crazy. Stop focusing on the future. The here and now is what matters, not something that might or might not happen in a week, a month, a year from now. Let him in, Lexy, just once, and you'll see what I do.''

She faces away from me, seemingly done with her rant.

Who knew Jen was so deep? Uh, not me.

But, as always, she's right.