Nantucket Romance 3-in-1 Bundle (94 page)
Sabrina strolled through the gardens beside Tucker. Every now and then his arm brushed hers, especially when they toured the crowded house. The artifacts had been fascinating, and though she knew most of what the guide recited, just seeing the rooms and desk where Longfellow had written had been a dream come true.
The garden showed off its summer wardrobe, a riot of colors and textures. Blue delphinium, pink hollyhock, vibrant purple Japanese iris, and dozens of other varieties crept and climbed the surfaces of the garden. Renny would be in heaven.
“What’s that?” Tucker pointed.
Sabrina caught sight of the bronze object nearby. “That must be the sundial. Longfellow’s daughter placed it here. She put her father’s favorite motto on it.”
“How do you know so much about this place? I think you could’ve led the tour.”
She shrugged. She’d never mentioned it in email, so it was safe to do so now. “I wrote a fifty-page essay on Longfellow in college.”
Tucker leaned over the inscription on the sundial. “I can’t read it.”
“You don’t speak fluent Italian?” she teased, then caught herself when he turned his crooked smile on her. “It means something like ‘Think that this day will never dawn again.’”
Tucker straightened, and she felt his eyes on hers. She’d felt him watching her throughout the day. On the long boat ride to Boston, over their quick lunch once they’d docked, through the house tour. Did they mean anything, those looks? She was confused.
“Think that this day will never dawn again.”
She thought it was meant to be inspirational, but today the thought depressed her. She wished this day could dawn over and over for all eternity.
She ran her fingers over the sundial, wondering what Tucker was thinking. A bird twittered, serenading them. Tucker was probably thinking about Arielle, wishing she were here instead. Though he had been a lighthearted and entertaining host. He’d made her laugh repeatedly, and Sabrina realized she hadn’t had so much fun in—well, she didn’t remember the last time.
Now, though, an awkward silence had fallen. Even the bird stopped his song, as if waiting expectantly.
She had to break the silence before whatever Tucker expected, whatever she hoped for, happened. “It’s too bad Arielle couldn’t come.” The name of her cousin had an instant dampening effect, at least on her.
“I’m having a great time. You’re a fun and knowledgeable date.” He cocked a grin at her before starting along the path again.
She fell in step beside him. The sun was sinking in the sky, had fallen behind the trees. A mild breeze cooled her skin.
“How about we find an air-conditioned café for a quick supper before we head back?” he said.
“Only if you let me pay my half.” He’d insisted on buying her lunch.
“Have it your way, stubborn.”
She bumped her shoulder into his arm, delighting too much in the sturdy feel of him.
Tucker pulled his car onto Sabrina’s street. Tired though he was from the long day, he dreaded its end. He’d enjoyed Sabrina.
Seeing her in her element, talking about her passion. It made him fall more deeply in love with her. It made him want to end the secrecy between them.
Just tell her you know.
No, I can’t risk losing her.
All the way back on the boat, he’d waffled back and forth.
Back and forth, back and forth. He was about to drive himself crazy with indecision. It wasn’t like him. But the cold, hard facts were that he’d spent another day with Sabrina, and she was no closer to telling him the truth. Whatever it was, whatever was holding her back, it had her by the heart and wasn’t letting go.
Now, he pulled his car into her drive, feeling reasonably settled about the decision he’d reached. He flipped off the ignition and unbuckled his seatbelt.
“You don’t have to walk me up. Arielle’s in bed already,” she said quickly. Sabrina had called twice to check on her cousin.
“I’ll see you to the door.” He exited the car before she could argue. They weren’t done yet; she just didn’t know it.
He followed her up the steps, admiring her form from behind, wishing he could set his hand at the small of her back.
You have no right to be looking, much less touching. What would she think if she knew the direction of your thoughts?
Sabrina fished her key from her bag and aimed it at the knob.
Tucker took her fist in his. “Wait. I wondered if we could talk a minute.” They’d had all day. Why didn’t he do this earlier?
Because you were hoping she’d do it herself.
“I—I should probably check on Arielle.”
“You called an hour ago, and she was in bed.”
She looked at the door as if hoping it might open up and swallow her. “I haven’t thanked you for today. I enjoyed seeing the mansion and—and everything.” She was looking everywhere but at him as she pulled her hand from his grasp.
He leaned against the door frame, conveniently blocking the knob. He saw right through her parting words, an attempt to end the evening quickly. “I’m glad you could go.” If she only knew how glad. If she only knew how badly he wanted to prolong the night.
But it was late, and they both had work tomorrow. Still, there was the matter of that one last piece of business. He took a breath, digging deep for courage.
“Sabrina, I feel like we’ve gotten to know each other pretty well recently.” He waited for a response, but got none, save a long swallow.
“I want you to know, if there’s anything you need, anything you ever want to talk about, I consider you a close friend.”
She tucked in the corners of her lips, a cross between a smile and a grimace. “Thank you.”
Her eyes darted over his shoulder, then to the ground between them, then to her hand that held the key. He was pretty sure the words
I’ve got to get out of here
were tumbling around that pretty little head.
He wanted her to be still long enough to hear him. He wanted her full attention. He nudged her chin up with his finger until she met his gaze.
She was a frightened doe. Those big brown eyes overflowed with panic. Worry lines creased her forehead, and her shoulders were plywood stiff. He regretted his words if only because they’d changed Sabrina back into the Ice Princess.
His hope withered slowly under a scorching light of realization. He didn’t know why—why she wouldn’t tell him, why she hid behind email, why she’d gone to such great lengths to protect herself.
But if she needed to hide, for whatever secret reasons, didn’t he love her enough to wait? In the space where hope had resided, a seed of mercy sprouted.
Ah, honey. I’m sorry I pushed you. You’re worth the wait.
He tried for a smile he didn’t feel.“You’re tired. Get to bed.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead and felt the softness of her hair under his lips, smelled the sweet scent of ocean and lilac in her hair.
He’d scarcely pulled away before her key found the lock, and then she was gone.
Sweetpea: Everyone yearns to be loved for who they are. Not for what they look like or what they do or what they’ve accomplished. I wonder how many people actually find that.
A cab waited in front of the house when Sabrina returned from work. Maybe Arielle was going somewhere.
For three days Sabrina had been lost in thought, remembering every moment of her date with Tucker. The morning after, Arielle had quizzed her about the day, and she’d told her cousin everything. Except the kiss. But it wasn’t a real kiss, just a brotherly kiss on the forehead.
Only it hadn’t felt brotherly at all.
She entered the loft and kicked off her work shoes. Arielle was hunched over her floral suitcase, pushing on the swollen bag, struggling with the zipper.
A glance around revealed a lack of all things Arielle. The sandy spot by the door where she usually kicked off her sandals was bare, the end table where she piled her clothes was empty. Dread welled inside Sabrina. “Where are you going?”
Arielle gave the zipper one last tug. “Home.”
She watched her cousin haul the suitcase off the sofa and set it at her feet. “What do you mean?”
“I’ve had enough of this charade, cuz. It’s time for me to go. I’m catching the ferry, and I booked a flight from Cape Cod.”
Had something happened between her and Tucker? This was totally out of the blue and utterly unfair. “What happened?”
“Nothing happened. I have to get back. I just—I can’t do this anymore.” A flicker of something—fear?—flared in her eyes before her eyelids shuttered them.
Now that Sabrina looked closer, Arielle’s face looked strained, her lips tipped uncharacteristically down at the corners, her brows pulled together. What was going on?
“It’s only a few more days, Arielle. We had a deal.”
“Deal’s off. I don’t expect you to come to the wedding, so you’re off the hook.”
What in the world? Arielle had begged her to attend Jaylee’s wedding. It was the only reason she’d come. “What reason did you give Tucker?”
A nonchalant shrug. “I didn’t tell him. I’m sure you’ll come up with something.”
“You didn’t tell him?” What explanation could Sabrina give?
Sorry,Tucker. The love of your life disappeared as quickly as she’d appeared.
Why was Arielle doing this?
Her cousin was wheeling her suitcase past her, toward the door. Sabrina grabbed her arm, panic building. “Why are you doing this? What are you so afraid of?”
Arielle whirled on her heels. “Don’t question
me
about fear. You’re hiding behind some email name because you’re afraid to have a real relationship. You’re worse than Renny, hiding her manuscripts in a drawer.”
Arielle’s anger, her words, stopped Sabrina cold. Her hand fell from her cousin’s arm.
“Go back to your safe little emails, Sabrina. Never mind that you’re missing out on a real relationship with a wonderful man . . .” Arielle’s words wobbled as the sentence trailed off.
When the door closed behind her cousin five seconds later, Sabrina knew with sudden clarity why Arielle was leaving the island, why fear laced her eyes, why angry words were spilling from her tongue.
Arielle had fallen head over heels for Tucker.
Sweetpea: I haven’t been to church since the Jared/ Jaylee episode. I just haven’t been able to bring myself to go.
Sabrina paced the length of the loft as the taxi pulled away. So,Arielle had fallen for Tucker. Was it any surprise? He was a wonderful man, just as she’d said. It was a miracle some woman hadn’t snatched him up already. But did it have to be her cousin? Was Sabrina destined to lose every man she loved to one of her beautiful cousins?
Sabrina kicked the chair Arielle had placed against the wall, and it toppled over, hitting the floor with a
thwack
. It was so unfair. What right did Arielle have stealing the only man she cared about? It had been stupid to encourage those dates. Stupid! Sabrina couldn’t have done a better job sabotaging herself if she’d tried.
She reached the windows and turned. Arielle’s feelings aside, the relevant question was, where did Tucker stand? He was caught in a triangle and didn’t know it. Was he in love with Sabrina or Arielle or some bizarre combination of them both? Sabrina ran her hands over her face. What had she done?
And how was she going to tell him Arielle was gone? What reason could she give? A family emergency? But what excuse could she give for keeping the relationship online now?
Was it time to admit defeat? To send him a final letter ending the relationship?
She imagined coming home to an empty inbox, facing Tucker at the café every morning with no hope of having that intimate communication again . . .
How her heart ached at the thought!
She couldn’t do it, she just couldn’t. It was all she had of him. All she could ever have, and it would have to be enough.
And yet, was it fair to tie him down to a relationship that could never go deeper than email?
But he loves you.
Why, God? Why, of all people, did it have to be Tucker? Why, of all men that night, did it have to be his brother-in-law?
But it was what it was. Begging and praying would change nothing. She had to focus on the problem. She had to decide what to tell Tucker and how to say it. Arielle had left a fine mess, leaving in a snit as she had.
Sabrina stopped pacing, her feet stopping on the braided rug Arielle had bought. Arielle had left Sabrina in a bind, but the fact that she’d left, despite her growing feelings for Tucker . . .
It was so obvious she’d almost missed it. Arielle was leaving for Sabrina. Despite her cousin’s testy words, she was removing herself from the picture out of love for her. Leaving so that Sabrina wouldn’t get hurt again.
And Sabrina hadn’t been nice about it
.
She cringed. She’d let her confusion and anger blind her, but everything was clearer now.
A knot of anxiety tightened inside. She couldn’t stand that they’d parted on bad terms. Especially now that she realized Arielle was willing to sacrifice a possible relationship with Tucker for Sabrina’s sake. She snatched her bag, slipped into sandals, and ran down the steps.