My Perfect Imperfections (3 page)

Layna made a lot of friends in high school, especially since she made the varsity dance team. Besides that, she was beautiful and excelled in all classes. The meeting place for all of the “popular kids” eventually became where my locker was located because Layna was always by my locker waiting for me. It felt really good to finally have some friends. Well, they were really Layna’s friends, but it didn’t matter. I liked being right in the center of everything. They were kind of cool, too, because sometimes they’d even include me in their conversations.

Layna walked me every day to most of my classes whenever she could, making sure I arrived safely. Even though I could easily drive to classes independently, I didn’t complain. Just being around Layna’s positive energy kept me in my happy place.

Once, when Layna was walking me to my life skills class, which was specific for special needs kids, there were two boys walking in front of us. They must have been freshmen because they seemed to be searching for their classes since it was the start of a new year.

One of the guys grabbed the other one and said, “No, not that classroom, dude. That’s the retarded classroom.”

The other boy laughed.

I was used to comments like that, but Layna was not going to let it slide. I could tell by the way she raised her chin up and squared her shoulders.

“Excuse me?” Layna marched right up to them.

Both boys turned beet red, recognizing Layna instantly. Now that we were juniors, everybody knew her. Immediately, they noticed me in my wheelchair next to her. I almost felt sorry for them because they looked humiliated. They did not want to get on the bad side of the most popular girl in school.

“Err, sorry…we didn’t mean…” The boy appeared flustered and embarrassed.

“What exactly did you mean? Have you even tried to get to know anybody from this class? Oh, and meet my sister. This is Lily. I’m pretty sure she can kick both of your butts when it comes to any IQ tests.”

I couldn’t help but smile. Layna knew exactly how smart I was.

“Sorry,” the other boy mumbled, staring at the floor.

A small crowd had gathered around, curious about the commotion.

Mrs. Torres, my teacher, stepped out. “What’s going on, ladies?”

“Oh, nothing we can’t handle, Mrs. Torres. I’ve come to realize that some humans are born just to occupy space.” Layna glared one more time at the boys, who continued to look ashamed. “Come on, Lily. They’ve already taken more of our time than they deserve.”

When Layna walked me to my desk, I gave her a high five. Then, we both giggled in victory.

Growing up, we never had money, so we rarely could take any vacations outside of going to waterparks occasionally. For that reason, Layna and I were especially surprised when Mom said we were going camping for the weekend.

“Really, Mom? We’ve never gone camping. Are we going to know what to do?” Layna asked.

“Dad’s coming with us,” Mom answered quickly.

What? Dad’s coming with us? That’s a bit strange. I mean Dad was always in the picture, but why would he go on a vacation with us?

“Who’s all going, Mom?” Layna asked, now curious.

“You, Lily, Duke, Dad, and I,” Mom replied, like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Layna didn’t say anything more about it to Mom, but when we were alone, she asked, “What do you think about Dad going with us? Don’t you think it’s strange? I mean, it’s a family vacation. Wouldn’t it be awesome if they got back together?”

Using my device, I answered, “Don’t jump to conclusions. He’s probably just coming along to help us out.”

“I don’t know, Lily. Neither of them has dated anybody seriously after the divorce. Think about it.”

I guess Layna had a point, but I had learned through the years not to get my hopes up high for anything.

Friday evening, Dad drove the van to the campgrounds about three hours away. The site was large enough, so our camping spot was nice and private. He put up two tents. They had brought the lightweight manual wheelchair for me, so he carried me out and placed me in it. He set up sleeping bags in both tents and then built a fire. Duke ran around us, excited to be out in nature.

“Isn’t this great, girls? We’re going to have a blast! A real family time,” Dad said as the fire came to life.

“It’s perfect, Bill,” Mom said, smiling.

Layna came by me and whispered, “Let’s see which tent Mom sleeps in tonight.”

After eating dinner and singing some songs by the fire, it was already dark, so Dad carried me to the tent. He tucked me into my sleeping bag and gave me a kiss on my forehead. “Goodnight, munchkin. Sweet dreams and I love you.”

I vocalized I loved him, too. Of course, it sounded like I was just making noise, but Dad knew exactly what I was saying to him. When Layna walked into the tent, he hugged her and told her he loved her as well.

When he left, Layna slipped into her own sleeping bag. “See, I told you! They’re sharing the same tent, Lily!” she whispered, her voice full of excitement.

I couldn’t help but laugh. As much as I didn’t want to get my hopes up, a part of me still wished that they’d get back together. For a brief moment, I allowed myself to dream of this.

After listening to Layna talk about school, dancing, and boys, I finally fell asleep.

The next morning, Mom and Dad seemed especially happy. I even caught him caressing Mom’s back at times. Layna would throw her knowing looks in my direction whenever she saw them being affectionate.

That afternoon, Dad suggested a hike. Since it would be difficult to push the wheelchair through the trails, it was decided that Dad, Duke, and Layna would go hiking. Mom and I would stay by the tent. I didn’t mind. I was just happy to be out in the sun and feeling the breeze combing through my hair.

After an hour of Mom reading her book while I listened to music, she approached me to check on me. “How are you doing, Lily? Do you want to get down and stretch for a while?”

I shook my head no. I was feeling very peaceful, and I didn’t want the feeling to end.

“I’ve had an upset stomach all day. I feel like I need to use the bathroom again. Would you mind if I go try to do that? I won’t be too far, and I should be back within minutes.”

Again, I shook my head no. I knew Mom was having stomach issues.

“Okay, I’ll be right back,” Mom said, squeezing my hand.

I watched her walk into the woods until she finally disappeared from sight. Since there were no toilets around, they just used the woods. They did bring the adapted, portable commode for me, though. There would be no way my body could squat to the ground.

As I waited for Mom, I closed my eyes, cherishing the serenity that was spreading over me.

Within minutes, I sensed something was wrong. When my eyes flew open, I saw a dog across the clearing. When I squinted my eyes for a better view, I suddenly realized it was a wolf. And, this wolf was staring right at me.

My heart sank from fear. I wanted to scream, run, and yell for help.
Oh my god, what am I going to do?

I turned my head toward the direction Mom had disappeared, but I didn’t see her. If I had my power wheelchair, maybe I could have done something like try to drive away from here. Instead, I was stuck, helpless, in this manual wheelchair, waiting for my fate.

The wolf slowly strolled toward me, and to my dismay, his fangs were out.

God, if you’re there, and this is how I’m going to leave this world, please make it quick. Please don’t make me suffer.

I looked down when he was about ten feet away from me. I didn’t want to look at him straight in his eyes because I read somewhere that if you look in their eyes, they may feel threatened. I didn’t understand what he wanted from me. I had nothing for him, not even food. Why was he stalking me?

As the hand of fear gripped my throat, I closed my eyes. I had no courage to keep them open. I could hear him sniffing around me. Why was this happening? Where was Mom? Completely frozen from fear, his hot breath fanned my face. He was sniffing me, but I dared not open my eyes. Feeling lightheaded, with tremors running through my body, I felt the air around me go completely still. Although it must have been mere seconds, it felt like my life flashed before my eyes. Bracing myself for the attack, a lonely tear rolled down my face. I was suddenly shocked when I felt his wet tongue on my cheek where the tear had left its trail. I wanted to turn my head away, but again, I remained motionless.

Soon, I no longer felt him next to me. What happened? Although still terrified to open my eyes, I slowly forced myself to sneak a peek.

The wolf was gone.

I glanced around, stunned. Then I spotted him. He was sitting by the tree line, watching me. Why was he still here? What did he want? But, I dared not move.

Shortly, I heard Mom’s footsteps. Oh no, the wolf would attack her! What could I do? I looked at her frantically, hoping she’d figure out that she was in danger. As soon as she saw the fear in my face, she immediately knew something was wrong.

Within seconds she reached me. “What’s wrong? What happened, Lily?”

I threw my head toward the direction of the wolf. Mom turned her head to face the wolf, who was now standing up, watching us. Her grip tightened around my shoulders briefly, and she positioned herself in front of me. The wolf watched us for few more seconds, and then miraculously, turned to disappear into the woods.

Mom and I didn’t move as the shock of what just happened sank in. When Mom was satisfied that he was gone, she turned to me.

“Oh my god, Lily. Are you okay?” She quickly examined me. When she noticed the footsteps made by the wolf around my wheelchair, she knew what had happened. “What the…he came all the way to you, Lily?”

I nodded, trembling with fear.

Mom grabbed her cell phone and called Dad. “Bill, you have to get back here. There was a wolf here.” She started crying into the phone. “Please hurry.”

Dad, Layna, and Duke were back within half an hour. All three were panting, so I had a feeling they all ran back.

“What happened?” Dad asked, frantic.

Mom began shaking. “A wolf was here. He left now. I had to use the bathroom. Bill, he came right by Lily. Oh my god, he was right next to Lily.” Mom was hysterical as she rambled.

“I don’t know what you’re saying. Where were you when he was by Lily?” Dad asked, coming to me and picking me out of the wheelchair, holding me in his embrace. I could feel him trembling as well.

“I wasn’t here, Bill. Remember, I said I’ve had an upset stomach all day. I stepped away just for a few moments. And—”

“You left Lily?” Dad turned to her. He placed me back into the wheelchair.

Layna came to me and grabbed my hand. She asked me if I was okay with her eyes. I nodded, not wanting her to worry.

“Bill, it was for a few moments only,” Mom tried to explain.

“Are you crazy? How could you leave her alone? She’s defenseless. Imagine how she must have felt!” Dad was screaming at her. “You have no common sense. Never did! No wonder we got a divorce. Probably the best decision I ever made!” Dad was being very cruel by then.

“That’s not fair!” Mom wiped her tears and yelled back. “I’ve done the best I could as a mother. I won’t let you take that away from me. Who do you think gets her ready for school every day? Who do you think gives her baths, makes sure all her needs are met? It must be nice to drop by here and there to help out. Remember, it’s me who makes sure that she is well taken care of every day. Me, Bill, not you!”