My Heroes Have Always Been Hitmen (Humorous Romantic Shorts) (Greatest Hits Mysteries) (2 page)

After the third hand, the men realized I wasn
't going to cheat or kill them, and they began talking amiably. I joined in a little here and there, and let them know I was just passing through. I bought several rounds of whiskey, and before long Rocco, Axel, and Hank were clapping me on the back like I was an old friend.

"
I'm stayin' at the hotel," I said as I picked up my cards in the seventh round. "Had lunch there."

Rocco grinned,
"Didja see Miss Penny Philpot?" He nudged his friends with his elbows knowingly. "She's got hair like a copper penny. Real purdy gal."

I nodded, feigning interest in my cards. I was a bit sad because I had to throw away another straight just to keep things friendly
. I discarded two cards and asked for replacements. "I saw her. Very pretty. She was waiting on the marshal."

Rocco
's smile faded quickly, and Hank and Axel frowned. They looked at each other for a second. I didn't prompt them, I just waited as Axel slid me two more cards and I added them to my hand. Damn. Now I had a royal flush.

"
Stay away from that marshal, friend," Rocco said quietly. He looked from left to right. "He's bad news."

I raised my eyebrows inquisitively
. "I got that impression. In fact, your friend, Miss Penny, seemed to be the only one who wasn't afraid of him."

Hank and Axel exchanged looks before Axel turned to me
. "The marshal's sweet on Penny. He's asked her ta marry him six or seven times. She always says no."

Hank nodded
. "There's no one braver in this town than Miss Penny."

"
I fold, gentlemen," I lied as placed my cards face down. "I just can't seem to catch a break today."

Rocco slapped
me on the back and laughed. "I gotta say this, yer a good loser, Rio."

I smiled and motioned to the barman for another round. Hank dealt the next hand.

"What is it, if you don't mind my asking," I said casually, "about this marshal that I need to avoid him?"

Rocco looked at me
. "If yer jest passin' through, make sure ya keep yer head down. Marshal Figgins owns this town."

"
Owns it?" I asked. "Owns the property?"

Hank shook his head
. "No sir. He don't have nothin' but his big house at the end of the street. He kinda owns it in a 'nother way."

"
What do you mean?" I dropped one card and held up a finger to Hank, asking for another card. I had nothing in the hand, but I had to make it look like my luck might be starting to turn. I may have been enjoying this a bit too much.

Axel piped up
. "He's the boss. He can shoot ya just fer lookin' at him funny and git away with it."

"
Really?" I asked as I slid my new card into my hand. "How is that legal?"

Rocco shook his head sadly
. "We've buried two judges, and the last one retired five days in. No one cares about what happens here."

I raised my eyebrows
. "Why don't you leave?"

Hank shrugged
. "Where'd we go?" The other two nodded in agreement, and that seemed to be the end of the conversation.

I didn
't press—afraid that would be suspicious. These men were getting liquored up and soon would be useless. I felt a buzz, but that was about it. I had a very high tolerance for alcohol. After losing yet another hand, I thanked them for the game and excused myself. They waved me off good naturedly, and I paid the barman for my tab and left.

It was getting late
, and I remembered that Prudence had said dinner was at six. I headed back to my room to clean up and then made my way back to the dining room for dinner.

A different clientele had filled the room this time. Well-dressed men and women took up every table but one
—the empty table by the window that still bore the reserved sign.

I guessed that the customers in the evening were guests of the hotel…travelers. Over lunch this must be a popular spot for the townies
. I wouldn't get much information from these people, so I just enjoyed my dinner.

The
marshal didn't show up. I supposed he either ate at home or was just out killing people. The small bit if information I'd been able to glean so far matched the information given to me about the assignment. Now I just needed to learn more about his movements. It seemed to me that Figgins wasn't going to go down easy, and I was the outsider here.

"
Would you care for some cobbler?" A sweet, soft voice intruded on my thoughts. I looked up to see the face of Miss Penny Philpot staring down at me.

She was beautiful. The word
"pretty" didn't really do her justice. Large, blue eyes, pale skin with a smattering of freckles across the nose, and wavy, flame-colored hair. She smiled warmly, and I forgot all about cowboys and six shooters.

"
That would be nice," I said somehow. She nodded and left, returning almost instantly with a dish of cherry cobbler. I thanked her, and she went back to the kitchen. I tried to read more into it but got nothing. It was immediately clear to me why the marshal had pursued her.

For the rest of the dinner, I tried to catch glimpses of Miss Penny Philpot as she worked her way around the room, greeting customers, serving cobbler
, and shining like a beacon of flame-haired loveliness.

I really needed to focus. I wasn
't here to court a woman. I was here to kill a bad guy, preferably in a showdown at high noon.

"
Sorry I missed dinner, Colonel." Jeb joined me at the table and sat down.

"
Not a problem," I said. "But please stop calling me Colonel. The war is over, and I'd rather you called me Rio."

Jeb nodded
, and Miss Penny Philpot returned to our table to take his order. I stopped thinking entirely. I couldn't stop staring at the way she smiled…the way she nodded and thanked Jeb for his order…the way she breathed…

"
Wow," Jeb said softly as I watched her walk away. "You've got it bad."

I tore my gaze away from the retreating Miss Philpot and turned to him.
"What?"

"
You couldn't stop staring at her," Jeb said with a grin.

All the air seemed to rush out of me
. "I was terribly rude, wasn't I?"

Jeb laughed
. "I don't think she minded, Col…I mean, Rio."

"
Really?" I sat up a little straighter in my chair. "How do you know?"

"
Just a feeling, Sir." Jeb took a sip from his glass of water and sat back.

"
You don't have to call me 'Sir,' Jeb. The war is over, and ranks don't matter anymore."

Jeb nodded
. "I know. Old habits are hard to break."

We chatted for a few moments until Penny brought his dinner, whe
n I stopped thinking and focused intently on her. I was rewarded with a lovely smile before she left to check on another table.

Jeb had found an interesting prospect
for work. A rancher outside of town needed a foreman and was partial to former Union soldiers because he'd lost two sons in the war. I listened politely and tried not to focus on the redhead who was distracting me.

After dinner, we said our good-byes and made our way to our rooms for the night. This business of being a cowboy had worn me out
, and I slept very soundly.

At breakfast the next morning, I was a little more reserved when Miss Philpot appeared. What was it about her that turned me into a brainless twi
t? I was here to do a job, and pursuing a woman who had turned down the most powerful man in town seemed foolish.

Jeb didn
't come down to eat, instead meeting me on the stairs to say he was riding out to the ranch for the day to inquire about the foreman position. That gave me a whole day free to find out all I could about Marshal Figgins.

Felony,
Texas was not a large town. There was the main street, intersected by four other roads, each with a couple of streets and back alleys all their own. I decided to leave Norbert in his stables and walk.

The day was hot and getting hotter. Dust swirled in the air every time someone stepped off the boardwalks and into the streets. I guess
ed this was better than mud, but I was completely coated with dust before half an hour was up.

Most of the legitimate businesses were on the main street
—a dry goods store, a dentist/barber, and the hotel with its restaurant and the saloon were bookended by a bank at one end and a very large house at the other.

I stopped in the dry goods store and bought a few toiletries, inquiring politely about the large, two-story house at the end of the street.

A young woman with brown hair pulled severely back in a bun, looked nervously around the store before answering.

"
That's the marshal's house, mister. Take my advice and don't get too close or ask too many questions." She was then shooed away by a thin, balding man I assumed was the manager. He curtly asked if there was anything else I needed. I got the distinct impression he wanted me to leave. I touched the brim of my hat and gathered up my purchases and left.

After returning to the hotel to drop off my items in my room, I headed back out for more exploration.
While getting change at the bank, I asked about houses for sale in the area. A pinched looking man frowned and said I had to build if I wanted anything around here. I asked who had built that large house at the end of Main Street. He shook his head and closed his window.

I had better luck at the stables as I checked on Norbert. My horse was happily eating a bucket of oats
which had fresh hay next to it. I swore his eyebrows went up when he saw me, as if to say,
I'm fine. Go away.

Two young boys were holding down the fort. They spoke animatedly about the town and its most fearful resident.

"And whatever you do, mister, watch out for the marshal!" the boy with red hair said as he hopped from one foot to the other.

"
Yeah!" the taller kid with blonde hair added. "He lives in the biggest house I ever saw," He pointed in the direction of the house. "And nobody lives there but him and his servants! Can you imagine that? A big house for just you!"

"
He doesn't have any family?" I asked as casually as I could. No family meant a few less grudge holders after I killed him.

The redhead shook his head
. "Nope! Just him!" The boy started to dance around the stables. He looked a bit like Miss Philpot, but maybe that was just because they shared the same hair color.

"
What's your name, son?" I asked.

The boy grinned
. "Percy! Percy Philpot! And I'm seven years old!"

This information startled me. Did Penny have a son? Or was he a younger brother?

"You stayin' at the hotel, mister?" the other boy asked. When I nodded, he said, "Percy's sister, Penny, works there. You probably seen her." He hoisted his thumb to his chest. "I'm Ned. My dad runs these stables. Percy's my cousin."

"
I help!" Percy giggled, before beginning to run in circles. Clearly the boy had too much energy.

"
I see." I was a little rattled by this new information. But why should I be? I wasn't courting Penny Philpot. Okay, so maybe I harbored the fantasy that she would ride into the sunset with me when this was all over, but now I knew she had family here.

I tossed the boys each a coin and asked them to take extra care of my horse. Norbert snorted as if he were laughing at me,
and then buried his snout in oats.

As I walked out into the street, I had this strange feeling I was being watched. Casually I looked around me but saw noth
ing in the blank faces. My instincts have never been wrong before. I ducked into an alley and waited.

"
Didja see 'im?" A cold voice traveled a little ahead of its owner.

"
Naw," came an equally gravelly reply. "Just disappeared-like. Figgins said we wuz to rough 'im up. Teach 'im a lesson."

My spine turned to steel
, and I prepared myself to fight. These two men were talking about me, I was certain of it.

A man came into view
, and I punched him in the throat before he saw me. He collapsed in a heap, spitting and clutching his neck.

"
Whut the…" The second man came around the corner, and before he could get to his gun, I laid him out with an uppercut to his bristly, unshaven jaw.

I dragged the bodies into the alley and stepped out onto the street, making my way back to the hotel
. It was lunchtime, and I needed to think.

I was sitting at a table in the dining room a few minutes later, concentrating on what had happened.

"Now then," a soft voice said over my shoulder, "what exactly do you think you're doing, asking questions and stirring up trouble?" Penny Philpot was standing over me, holding a pitcher of water that after a knowing glance, she poured into the empty glass in front of me.