Montana Cherries (34 page)

Megan had also come in with Jaden yesterday, and she and Gloria were pulling up the rear of their three-car procession.

They’d shopped, dined out, had their nails done, and gotten the girls’ hair styled.

They’d even ended up having their pictures taken a couple of times by people who recognized Angelica, and that morning they’d requested a late check out of the hotel and spent the day by the pool. All in all, it had been a great trip. The time away couldn’t have been more relaxing. Especially knowing that a houseful of men were back home preparing dinner.

Only, Dani had been stressed.

Because Ben was at the house. And she had every intention of talking to him.

She only hoped it wouldn’t have to be in front of another woman.

“It was a fun day,” Aunt Sadie mused.

“Yeah.” Dani put the car in park, but didn’t move to unbuckle her seat belt. She left both hands on the steering wheel and stared straight ahead.

“You okay?” Her aunt asked. She had her belt off, and her hand on the door.

Dani shook her head. She was so
not
okay.

Everyone else passed their car, heading for the back door, and still, Dani sat. Aunt Sadie pulled her hand back and clasped her fingers together in her lap.

“This about Ben?” she asked carefully.

Dani nodded. “I just need a minute.”

“Okay. I’ll sit with you.”

A small smile came to Dani’s lips. “I love you, Aunt Sadie. No matter what’s going on, you’re there for me, aren’t you?”

“I’ve always tried to be.”

“And I appreciate it. Very much.” Dani leaned across the front seats and gave her aunt a hug, and as she did, it was as if the strength from the other woman transferred to her. Her family had her back. She loved that about them. “Let’s go in,” she said. She wasn’t ready, but at the same time, it felt like she’d been looking forward to this her whole life.

She had a man to win back.

They got out of the car, and moved to the house, and through the back windows Dani could see her brothers, her father, Uncle Jonas, Gloria, Megan, Ben’s mother, and the girls.

No Ben.

And no girlfriend.

She and Sadie stepped inside the house to controlled chaos. Her brothers saw her, and all came over to greet her, welcoming her home. She’d never felt so much love. And amazingly, the house smelled like Thanksgiving—turkey and dressing. With not even a hint of burned food.

Impressive.

She shed her coat while the guys moved back into the kitchen, where each had a task that needed tending. Watching them, Dani forgot all about Ben. She focused, instead, on her brothers. Nick and Cord seemed at a loss as to what to do, but did take instructions well. Jaden wasn’t a total reject, Gabe was on about the same level as him, and Nate seriously was in charge. The man even wore an apron around his waist.

Jenna and Haley attempted to help them out, and Dani’s dad and uncle were on dish duty.

Dani suddenly wished she had the camera Ben had carried around all summer. This was a shot that would win the hearts of millions of women, if they could only see it.

And then Ben came down the hall.

He was alone.

He stared across the room, his eyes on hers, but he didn’t speak.

And Dani simply couldn’t do it. She reversed positions, and headed in the opp
osite direction. “I forgot something in the car,” she mumbled when Aunt Sadie looked in her direction, then she fled out the back door. She needed one more minute.

She needed to breathe.

Stepping into the cold air, she realized she’d come out without her coat, but she didn’t let that slow her down. Taking the stairs, she played along with her ruse and went to her car. She’d said she left something in there, so she’d find something to take back inside with her. And by the time she did, she’d have herself back under control.

But, damn. She’d forgotten that she’d always kept her car as clean as she’d once kept the house.

Opening the back door, she leaned inside and peered at the floor. Jenna had sat back there a lot. Surely there was something stuck under one of the seats that she could use.

She shivered as a burst of cold air slid up the back of her shirt, and reached a hand under the passenger seat. When she landed on something fuzzy, she pulled it out. It was a piece of purple fluff from Jenna’s princess wand. It would have to do, because she was now freezing her rear off.

When she straightened from the seat, Ben was there waiting for her. With her coat.

Ben held Dani’s coat out for her, and couldn’t stop himself from soaking the woman in as she silently turned and slid her arms into the sleeves. Good Lord, he’d missed her. The time apart had eased the memory of his loss, but now that she was back? All he’d thought of over the past six days was her.

When he got Haley ready for school—he’d wondered if Dani was out of bed yet.

When he’d taken Montana out for a walk—he’d wanted to know if Dani was walking on the beach.

And when he and Karen had been out Saturday night.

He’d desperately wished for it to be Dani.

Karen had wanted more; he’d been going too slow for her. So he’d kissed her.

And he’d thought of Dani the entire time.

Karen had not been pleased to be taken home early. But he couldn’t worry about that now. Dani was back. She wasn’t out of his head. And he had to find out what that meant.

She took her time buttoning her coat, and when she finally faced him, he felt as if the light had come back on in his world. Damn, he didn’t mean to still love this woman.

“Rumor is that you’ve set up shop in town,” he said. He’d heard that all week.
Dani Wilde is back, and it looks like she’s here to stay.

“I’ve rented a building on Main,” she confirmed. Her face remained passive.

“The two-story with the vacant apartment on top?” Not that he’d driven by trying to figure it out. Much.

She gave a small nod. “No longer vacant.”

“So what does that mean?” he asked.

Her throat moved as she swallowed. She glanced toward the house and back to him, then finally she spoke. “It means I’m home, Ben. To stay.”

Both elation and frustration sailed through him. She was home.

To stay.

He either had to get over her—
fast
—or he had to be prepared to chase her until he caught her for good. There was no middle of the road on this for him. And he feared there was really only one path he could take.

He just wasn’t sure if he was prepared to take it.

“Why?” he asked.

“Why am I home?” She looked at the house again, and this time she chewed on her bottom lip. Then she peered through the dark in the direction of the nearest field of trees. Then toward the beach. When her gaze came back to his, he felt as if he’d traversed the grounds of her family’s orchard with her. “Because this is where I belong.”

“Seems fickle. A short time ago New York was where you belonged.” His words were harsh, but he couldn’t help it. And he didn’t care. The last time they’d both been here she’d told him she didn’t love him.

He didn’t want to love her either.

“New York
was
where I belonged,” she answered. “Three months ago. One month ago, even. But not anymore. I don’t need the escape anymore.” She shook her head. “I’m not healed. I won’t ever be healed. Childhood scars remain forever. But I am better. I’m mentally healthier. I can function in the world I live in without having to create make-believe barriers to keep it from being too hard, and most importantly . . . I
want
to function in the world I live in. But I want to do it in
my
world. My home. Here, in Montana. I want my own life. I want to love. And I want to be loved. So I’m back. For good.”

He swallowed the words that rose to the top. He’d loved her. He’d offered her all of that.

But he also remembered how she
had
needed to go. She hadn’t dreamed that up, and he was honest enough to admit that he’d understood it. He just hadn’t like it.

And he’d watched her change over the weeks through her phone calls with Haley.

He got what she meant when she said was better. She was. He’d just never been able to figure out if the changes had come about because of her, or due to someone else. And that ate at him. That terrified him.

“Did you meet anyone in New York?”

Her brows shot up. “You mean a man?”

“Yes.”

The laugh that slipped out of her was dry. “No, Ben. I didn’t meet anyone. You’re the only one who’s been dating. You’re the one with a girlfriend.”

He didn’t acknowledge or deny her words. Yes, he’d gone out.

No, he didn’t have a girlfriend.

“You told me to move on,” he said.

“Yeah. I’m aware of that.” She shivered as she stood in front of him. They remained slightly behind the open car door, but that wasn’t enough to keep the wind from whipping around them. Even with a coat, it was too cold to be outside. Snow was moving in, and an arctic blast had arrived first.

“Get in my car,” he said.

She motioned toward the house. “It’s time for dinner.”

“Dinner can wait. We need to talk, Dani. And it’s cold out here.” When she didn’t move, he added, “We can’t talk in the house. Every one of them would be listening to us.” He held out his car keys. “Get in my car, and I can at least run the heater to keep us from freezing to death.”

With a small nod, she headed for his car.

And with sudden clarity, he realized that he wanted to take her to his house.

He’d refused to let Karen come to his home, but he wanted Dani there. He needed to see her there.

He got in the vehicle, and started it up, and when he put it into gear she barely acknowledged the action. It was as though she’d known he would take them somewhere. Possibly, she understood where they were going.

chapter twenty-nine

D
ani sat stiffly in the front seat of Ben’s SUV as he made the five-minute drive to his house. The instant he’d put the car into drive, she’d known where they were going. Which thrilled her. She wanted to see his home. Only . . .

When the house came into view, nerves ignited in her stomach. She turned to him, apology in her heart, but she had an issue with this. “Have you brought your girlfriend here?”

She didn’t think she could go inside if he’d had another woman there.

Ben didn’t answer. Instead he focused on maneuvering in the narrow driveway.

When he reached the side of the house, he parked facing the lake, shifted out of gear, and stared straight again. “I don’t have a girlfriend.”

Dani snorted, and Ben shot her a irritated look.

“Dad and Gloria babysit for you,” she said. “I overheard you making a date.”

“She’s not my girlfriend.”

“Fine,” she grumbled. “Has your bed-buddy been here?”

“Dani, for Christ’s sake. I thought you might want to see the house. I
want
you to see the house.” He motioned to the side door. “Do you want to go in or not?”

She shook her head. Right or not, her jealousy won out. “Not if another woman has been here.”

Yes, she’d told him to move on. And she’d meant it. She hadn’t thought she would be back. She hadn’t thought she’d ever feel less than abnormal.

But she was, and she did.

And the very thought of Ben making love to another woman inside the house he’d once suggested could be theirs brought bile to the back of her throat. She stared at the large house sitting quietly in the dark.

She could move on from him dating. If she wanted him, she’d have to.

But did she have to see where he’d taken another woman?

“Take me back to the house, please,” she requested.

He turned off the car.

“Ben.” She whipped around to him. “I asked you to—”

“No!” he shouted. “No one has been here. No woman. I couldn’t stand the thought of it. I only wanted you here, don’t you get that? It’s you, dammit. Only you. Yet I’m so hurt, and so angry, that
you
may not even be enough. I don’t know. But I want you to see my house.” His voice lowered with his last sentence, and she gave a hurried nod before climbing from the car.

Did that mean she could hope?

Ben unlocked the side door, and led her in through the kitchen. His house was warm and inviting, and her dad had been right. In the daylight, there would be spectacular views from his back windows. But even with the enthusiastic greeting from Haley’s dog, Dani struggled to feel welcome. Not with Ben standing so stiffly beside her.

She followed along behind him as he showed her the house, her coat still on, and her arms crossed over her chest, and she appropriately complimented the spaces that she saw. It was a fabulous home.

It was a place she could see herself in.

What had he meant, exactly, that it was only her? Did he still love her?

“Why did you come to the house tonight?” she asked. That question had been burning in her mind since Gabe had told her Ben would be there. Why would he come? Either he was over her—and had truly moved on—or . . .

What?

He wanted to see her?

He wanted to have this talk?

They stood in Haley’s room now, and as Dani looked out over the lake, Ben looked at her. “I came because I was invited,” he answered simply.

“Yet you knew I would be there,” she pushed back. She didn’t turn to him as she spoke, instead maintaining her visual on the dark night beyond the window. It was easier than facing him. “Why did you come?” she repeated.

“Because I couldn’t stay away.”

She finally looked at him then, her gaze drawn to the hollowness of his eyes. He didn’t want to care about her anymore; she could see that inside him. But he did.

“I came because, whether I want to admit it or not, we’re not finished. I need answers.”

She nodded. “And are you getting them?”

He took her in, and for the first time tonight he seemed to look deeply enough to actually see her. He stared into her eyes, took in the twist of her hands and the protective barrier of her coat.

She believed that he saw her fear.

That he might see how terrified she was of losing him for good.

“You said you could love me now,” he told her.

“I do love you now.”

His gaze heated, but he said nothing else. The look, though, it empowered her. Telling him that she loved him hadn’t been as hard as she’d thought. And the way he was staring back at her . . . she began to truly hope that all might not be lost.

“It’s the real kind of love,” she went on. “Not the kind where I want to wash your clothes or do your dishes for you. As a matter of fact, I’ll be fine if I never do dishes again.” She forced herself to loosen her stance and lowered her arms. “I love you, Ben. The right way. But I also love me. So to go back to your earlier question at the house . . . am I back? Yes. Forever. No matter what happens between me and you.”

All she could do then was wait.

She’d laid her cards on the table, and her heart was in his hands.

A muscle ticked in his jaw. “You don’t need New York?”

“No.”

“Just like that?”

She pulled in a breath and blew it back out. “It wasn’t just like that. I spent three months in therapy. I’ve worked really hard on myself. New York was my way to not be around my mother. To not
be
my mother,” she stressed. “But I’m not her. And I believe that now. So no, I don’t need New York. I had a job I loved here. I like working for myself. I enjoy helping my clients. I don’t need anything else.” She paused before adding, “Except you.”

“Christ,” he mumbled under his breath. “You . . .”

He stopped trying to talk and just looked at her. She stared back, doing her best to show him anything at all that he needed to see. She was here. And she was his, if he would have her.

She could be forever.

“Damn, Dani.”

He pulled her to him then, and a moan of relief slipped out of her. His mouth found hers, and she clutched at him. His lips were hot and seeking, and they clung to her with the same desperate need that she felt. She didn’t want to ever let go.

Only, the kiss ended too soon.

She whimpered when he pulled away.

“I love you,” he ground out.

She nodded as tears filled her eyes. “I love you. I’m so sorry, Ben. I never meant to hurt you.”

“I know.” He pulled her back to him and just held her. “I do. And I see how good you are now.” He looked down at her. “Yet still the woman I love.”

“Do you think we could date?” her voice quivered. “See where this could go?’

He laughed. “Babe. I know where this is going to go. So before we commit to doing anything, there’s one more thing I need to get off my chest.”

“Oh, God,” she groaned. “You slept with her.” Pain sliced through her.

“What?” He shook his head. “No. I’ve slept with no one but you. Shit, Dani. I forced myself to kiss her after three dates, and that ended it. It’s
only
you. Always you. I don’t want anyone else.”

She nodded, loving his words. “Then what do you need to tell me?”

He took her hand, and he led her from Haley’s room. Turning outside the door, she followed him down the hall until they reached another room. When he pushed the door open, she saw that it was the master bedroom. It had the view. The stars were bright enough that even in the dark she could make out the lake and the surrounding mountains through full-length windows. A deck sat outside a set of French doors, and Ben took them to it.

The wind remained cold, but he stepped behind her and wrapped her in his arms, and she would forever be warm enough. They gazed at the water together, and he pointed out his beach. And his boat dock.

“That spot right there,” he said into her ear. “If we do this, I’m eventually going to make love to you right there.” He turned her to him. “
And
I’m eventually going to ask you to marry me.”

She stared at him. She couldn’t breathe.

“We stop here if you aren’t ready for that,” he told her. “Because I won’t lose you again. I can’t. I can’t have you in my life for a short time, and let you walk out of it ever again. So if we do this, you have to be prepared to say yes.”

She nodded. And tears fell. She couldn’t have asked for anything more.

“When you ask me,” she began, her voice no longer shaking. “I promise I’ll say yes.”

He kissed her for real, then, and it didn’t stop after a few seconds.