Mine To Take (Nine Circles) (37 page)

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Authors: Jackie Ashenden

BOOK: Mine To Take (Nine Circles)
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She met his dark gaze, saw the fury in his eyes. Rage pushing past his usual icy detachment. And she didn’t know what was more frightening, the man of ice or this one, the volcanic rage she’d seen once in his parking garage surging to life.

But he’d never hurt her before. He wouldn’t now.

“I said no. I said I wasn’t leaving you. I promised.”

“Honor,” Guy said, taking a few steps toward her. “You need to listen to him. You have to go.”

Behind him Gabriel moved, so fast Honor had no time to shout out a warning. His hand gripped Guy’s shoulder and he spun the other man around, his fist gripping a handful of cotton and pulling tight.

“Who the fuck is it?” Gabriel demanded. “Who the fuck hurt my mother, prick? And why the hell did you write her that check?”

“It was supposed to be for an abortion,” Guy said, panting. He didn’t struggle, hanging in Gabriel’s grip. “And to shut her up. I had to take the fall if anyone asked. And I had to write the check. No one could know.”

“Gabriel,” Honor said softly, coming closer. “Let him go, please.”

He ignored her. “Yeah, well, she was Catholic, you bastard. She didn’t get an abortion. She had me instead.”

“God,” Guy whispered. “You have no idea what you’re doing.”

Gabriel tightened his grip, the cotton pulling taut around Guy’s throat. “Tell me, motherfucker,” he hissed. “Tell me who he is.”

He was going to hurt Guy. Honor knew it as surely as she knew her own name. Gabriel was going to do him damage and she was the only person who could stop him.

Guy deserved a good many things, but being harmed by this man wasn’t one of them. And neither did Gabriel deserve another mark on his soul. Because he’d regret it later. He’d take the responsibility for it as he did with everything else and the more he took, the more he was crushed by the weight. Until the good man she suspected was underneath all that ice, all that blackness, would be crushed utterly.

She could not let that happen.

“Gabriel,” she murmured, coming around the two men, standing at his elbow. “Stop.” She put a hand on his back, felt the tension like a live wire electrocuting him. His whole body was tight. Every muscle taut. “Please.”

His face was twisted with rage and contempt. He was breathing fast, hard.

His whole life had just been shattered by Guy’s revelation and God, she knew what that felt like.

She spread her fingers out on his back, pressing hard, letting him know she was there for him.

For a second no one moved or said anything.

Then abruptly Gabriel let go, shoving Guy away from him, and Honor let out a breath she didn’t even realize she’d been holding.

Guy stumbled back a few steps, his hand going to his throat, breathing hoarse. “I could have you up on assault charges!”

“No, you won’t,” Gabriel spat. “You’re going to tell me who my father is, otherwise everything you’ve done will be all over the media by tomorrow, I don’t care who you are.”

The older man heaved in a breath, looking at Honor. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I never meant to involve you in any of this.”

“That didn’t stop you from taking her fucking money.” Gabriel’s voice vibrated with barely leashed violence.

Honor slid her hand beneath his leather jacket onto the warm cotton of his shirt, keeping the contact steady. His muscles were bunched and tight, a tremor running through him.

She ached for him. For the anguish she could feel radiating from him.

Guy was still looking at her. “I had to get out of this somehow,” he went on, “I didn’t want to keep laundering that cash. Bankrupting the company was the only way out. Without Tremain Hotels they’ll have to find someone else.”

Her throat closed. “Why couldn’t you have just said no?”

An expression she didn’t understand crossed his face. “Oh, dear girl. You don’t understand. You can’t say no. No one says no. I thought I could do it. Bankrupt the company, leave the country. Get a new life where they wouldn’t find me.”

“And Mom?” She couldn’t stop herself from asking, even though the truth was going to hurt. “Did they … pay you to marry her?”

He didn’t look away. “I suppose you know about Daniel?”

“That he used to run this place, yes.”

Guy sighed. “You have to understand something. He didn’t choose it. He was told.”

“What do you mean?”

“I can’t explain, not here. But you need to know Daniel wasn’t happy with it. And then the casino began losing money. They were … furious. Especially when he died and they had all these debts to cover up. They used me. I was given money to pay the debts, then marry his widow when the authorities began looking too closely. But … I did love her, Honor. I loved you, too. You have to believe me. I want to take her with me when I go.”

A complex knot of emotions gripped her, so tangled she couldn’t work out which was which. The hand on Gabriel’s back closed into a fist, clutching the cotton of his shirt. “What about my company? My money?”

“It’s for us when we find a new life.” Her stepfather’s shoulders drooped. “I thought … I thought you wouldn’t mind if it meant your mom was safe.”

Anger surged. “She wouldn’t be in danger if you hadn’t married her in the first place!”

The look on his face was weary. “No, she might have taken her own life instead.”

A shudder swept through her, because of course, he was right. If he hadn’t come along and picked her up out of the hole of depression she’d fallen into, that might have happened. Then what would have become of her? An eight-year-old by herself. Into the foster system she would have gone …

“That doesn’t answer the most important question,” Gabriel said roughly.

Guy lifted his chin. “I’ll tell you. But like I said, not here.”

“Yes, you fucker. Right now, right—”

“If anyone finds out, you’ll be in danger.”

“I don’t give a fuck about that.”

“No, I know you don’t. But do you want to risk her, too?”

Honor stilled. “What do you mean?”

“You were both seen at the casino tonight. Questions will be asked, especially about you, Honor. Considering what happened to your father.” He paused, looked at Gabriel. “And as for yours … He’s connected to this and if you make a move against him, he’ll know. And it won’t be you he’ll come after—not when you’re too powerful to hurt. It’ll be her.”

“The hell he will,” Gabriel growled softly. “Over my dead fucking body.”

“You might be able to protect her, or you might not. Either way, you pursuing revenge or justice or whatever the hell it is, will mean she will never be safe. Not while he thinks she means something to you.”

Her shoes were wet, ruined by the snow, and the adrenaline rush that had brought her out of the car was starting to fade, leaving her shaken and chilled to the bone. Whoever Gabriel’s father was, he would use her to get to him …

She didn’t want to look at him. Didn’t want to see what kind of expression was on his face. Her hand was still on his back, fingers clutching his shirt, and now the tension was vibrating through her, too.

“Not while he thinks she means something to you…”

What did she mean to him? A lover he liked to screw? Another responsibility he had to protect? A friend?

It shouldn’t matter. She cared about him, but she’d never expected anything from him in return. She didn’t want anything …

Liar. Of course you want something. You want everything.

“I have to know his name,” Gabriel said, hard and cold. “Whether I do something about it or not.”

Honor shivered, an icy sense of disappointment creeping through her no matter how desperately she told herself she didn’t feel it. He wanted the name. He wanted to know more …

More than he cares about you.

Guy glanced again at Honor, a single look loaded with things she didn’t understand. “I’m sorry, Honor,” he said softly. “For everything.” Then he looked back at Gabriel. “Tomorrow. I’ll let you know where to meet.” He didn’t wait for a response, turning and walking back to his car, and starting the engine and pulling away.

Gabriel took a step away from her, too, his shirt slipping from her grip. And she felt the separation like a blow. Like he was removing himself from her.

She swallowed against the instinctive pain that tightened the back of her throat. “I’m sorry,” she forced out. “I know how—”

“Where’s Zac and Eva?” He turned to her all of a sudden, the darkness in his eyes blazing. “You weren’t supposed to be here. You were supposed to be back home.”

Anger. Of course anger. What else did he have to turn on her after this? Well, she wasn’t going to take it. She never had.

Honor lifted her chin. “I didn’t want to be delivered home like a package, Gabriel. I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“Go get in the fucking car. You don’t want to be around me right now.”

The aura of danger, of leashed violence around him had grown, thick and almost tangible. But she could see past that. She could see what was beneath it. Pain.

Ignoring the menace in his voice, she walked straight up to him and lifted her hands, taking his face between them. “I’m not going anywhere. I told you, I’m here for you and I’m not leaving.”

He moved. Too fast to avoid or escape. One moment she was standing on the pavement, the next she was hard up against the brick wall behind her, his body pinning her there, his eyes burning into hers. “You shouldn’t have stayed. You should have left while you had the chance.”

Honor’s heartbeat accelerated, but she wasn’t afraid. Not of him. She only felt an aching kind of sadness, the pressure of the vast, heavy emotion pressing down on her. She touched his face, let her fingers trace the outline of his mouth. Finding the softness there. The warmth. The man he was beneath the cold and the danger. A man in pain. Whose life had been hard in the extreme and who was still carrying the cost of it on his soul.

“I’m not leaving, I told you. And I know what it’s like when what you thought was the truth isn’t. It’s hard, Gabriel. Believe me, I know.”

He stared at her and she could feel the shake of his body against hers. Then he knocked her hand away and kissed her, a hard, desperate kiss that had her body waking into life, hungry for him in a way she’d never felt before. She pushed her fingers into his hair, fisting the short golden strands. Kissing him back, harder, even more desperate.

But he pulled away, a savage look in his eyes, a roaring darkness that hinted at all the passions that ran deep inside him. The passions he kept so carefully hidden.

“This is a lie,” he said, his voice hoarse. “You and I? It’s a lie. I targeted you. I seduced you. Deliberately. Because of your connection to Tremain.”

She didn’t understand at first. “What? What do you mean you seduced me?”

“I wanted to take him down. And I needed information about him. Information I could get from you.”

Cold began to burrow its way under her skin. Heading straight for her heart. “I don’t … understand.”

The lines of his face were so hard. Like they were carved out of diamonds. The only thing that had any life, any heat were his eyes. Burning. Glittering.

“Getting close to you was easy. Every woman likes a bad boy, don’t they? Especially rich, pampered little girls like you.”

The cold reached her heart, freezing tendrils wrapping around it. Slowing her breathing. Chilling her blood. “I … You didn’t want me?”

He looked so cold. As cold as she felt. As cold as the snow at her feet.

“No,” he said flatly. “I never did.”

*   *   *

It hurt to kill the blue spark in her eyes. To make them darken. To see her face go pale. All her precious, vital warmth fade.

It was a lie but it was a necessary one. Because how else could he make her leave? She’d promised she’d stay with him and she couldn’t. Not if he wanted to take down whoever his father turned out to be.

Fuck, he’d been certain of Tremain’s guilt. But when the man had denied his involvement, he’d been forced to believe him. He knew a lie when he saw one and Tremain wasn’t lying.

He’d been chasing the wrong guy for weeks.

The shock was still echoing through him, the ground he’d been so sure of now broken beneath his feet. And all he could think of was how he’d thought that this was the end, that once he’d confronted Tremain he could finally get some peace, put down the intolerable burden of his anger.

But it wasn’t the end. There would be no end until he had the name of his father. Until he had what he craved. Justice.

Yet he couldn’t have that and keep Honor safe. He couldn’t have both after all. And if she wouldn’t leave him, then he’d have to make her. Push her away and ensure she never came back.

The sapphires around her neck glittered in the cold light from the streetlight. “You never wanted me?” she demanded. “Never?”

He steeled himself. “No. Never. You were always a means to an end.”

It hurt to say it. Hurt more than he’d ever thought possible. And he didn’t really understand why. He’d ended things with lovers before and it hadn’t felt this painful.

She’s more than a mere lover and you know it.

No, he didn’t know. He didn’t know anything anymore. The only thing he was sure about was that she had to leave and if he had to hurt her to get her to do so, then he would.

Jesus, he’d hurt so many people in his life, she’d be just one more.

And sure enough, pain flared in her eyes, bright and sharp. And he felt it slide into his heart like a piece of glass, cutting him. “I don’t believe you.”

He didn’t want to move, wanted to keep the warmth of her close, and pushing her away felt like the hardest thing he’d ever done. But he made himself do it. “Believe it.”

She stood still, leaning back against the wall, her eyes wide with shock. Small and pale and fragile as porcelain. And the sharp, unfamiliar pain wound around his heart like barbed wire.

Then something glowed in her face, something brighter than hurt. Anger. “You fucking liar, Gabriel Woolf,” she said in a clear, calm voice.

Before he could move, she launched herself at him, her arms around his neck, pulling his mouth down on hers. Hot and hungry, aggressive in a way she’d never been aggressive before. Demanding a response. A response his body gave her before he’d had a chance to stop it.

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