Midnight Sun (Arctic Love Book 3) (2 page)

Kosmo had been a present from Andreas and Christian. Christian's she-dog Shaka had got a litter of puppies, and Frey had got Kosmo. Kosmo's father was Rokko, who belonged to Christian's friend and business partner Jonathan, who was also the lover of Frey's twin, Varg. Kosmo didn't look anything like the white, black and grey father though. With his white and brown fur and his bi-eyes he looked exactly like his mother Shaka.

When his wrist was tightly wrapped up, Frey went over to the sink to brush his teeth. He had worked the night shift at the hospital and had only been home for an hour, in which he'd made himself something to eat and taken out the rubbish. He was going to meet Andreas for lunch later in the day, when Andreas was done with classes, and Frey planned to get a few hours of sleep in before then.

He carried Kosmo with him into bed. He supposed most people didn't like their pets in bed, it probably wasn't the best dressage for a dog, but Frey liked having Kosmo all snuggled up to him. Kosmo was a dog and completely safe, he would never harm him.

People on the other hand. People could hurt. The trusting nature of his boyhood had been brutally broken years ago and Frey didn't think he could ever let another person get that close again.

He saw Jørgen in his mind's eye, but Frey closed his eyes and sighed, patting Kosmo's silky fur. Jørgen was so handsome, so good-looking it made Frey's knees buckle, but he could not let him in, no matter how attracted he was to him. Even if Jørgen were to reciprocate Frey's interest. Frey could not give Jørgen what any normal man wanted.

He was too broken.

*~*~*

"He won!" Andreas cheered, hugging Christian's arm tightly.

Frey stood at Andreas' other side, his eyes locked on Jørgen. Jørgen had participated in the annual scooter race, which he apparently did every year according to Andreas, and he had just crossed the finish line, ahead of everyone else. Frey had had his heart in his throat through the whole race. They'd gone so fast. It couldn't be safe.

When Jørgen came towards them, his green eyes shining and with a big smile on his lips, Frey couldn't help but stare at him. Jørgen looked so good, he was so handsome, so—he was Frey's dream bloke.

Andreas greeted Jørgen. "That was awesome!" They clasped hands and moved into one of those one-hand, clap-on-shoulder hugs that guys sometimes did. Frey had never done something like that to anyone, but seeing Jørgen doing it with Andreas, he found himself wishing he could be so close to someone too.

"He wins every year," Christian reminded Andreas dryly. "No one else stands a chance."

Jørgen grinned at Christian, then turned his attention to Frey. "Hi, Frey."

Frey felt his cheeks heat up and he looked down. "Hi," he murmured, moving his feet uncomfortably.

"Are you coming to eat with us?" Andreas asked Jørgen.

"Yeah, sure."

Frey didn't know if he was disappointed or not. Jørgen made him so nervous, but at the same time he liked looking at him. Even if there could never be anything between them. At least he could dream. Wish for something that could've been, if he hadn't been so broken.

Frey trailed after his friends in silence. They went to Kroa, their usual place to eat when they went out. Frey liked Kroa. It was very cosy and they had good food.

"Frey."

Frey lifted his head to look at Andreas.

"I have some bad news." Andreas chewed at his bottom lip. "That trip we had planned in three days. I can't make it. I have to go on a field excursion for my master's degree. I know you've already taken the day off and all, but it was the only time available for the excursion."

Frey was disappointed. Andreas had promised to show him a bit of Svalbard outside Longyearbyen. But he understood. Andreas' master's degree came ahead of everything else. "That's ok. No worries."

Jørgen looked between them. "That sightseeing trip?" he asked, and Andreas nodded in reply. Jørgen turned his eyes to Frey and Frey swallowed heavily. "I could take you, so that your day off wouldn't be wasted. I'm quite a spectacular guide."

Frey felt panic squeeze at his stomach. Go on a trip with Jørgen? Only the two of them, all alone in the wilderness of Svalbard? Andreas was smiling, looking like it was a perfect idea. Frey didn't want to say no, it would be rude when Jørgen had been so kind to offer. Frey never liked to be rude.

"Ok," he whispered, blinking rapidly.

"I've already talked to Karina about the horses," Andreas told Jørgen. "I'm sure she won't mind that I'm being replaced by her best mate."

Jørgen chuckled and Frey smiled slightly. He really liked Jørgen's smile. He was glad that they would be riding. Frey was more comfortable with horses than a snowmobile. And now that he was going with Jørgen... it was best to be on horseback, with a horse to take care of. If things got too awkward he could always concentrate on the horse.

But even if the panic squeezed his stomach tighter, he couldn't help but feel the butterflies fluttering nervously, in anticipation. Frey couldn't get himself involved with anyone in a sexual way, but maybe they could grow to be friends? Frey didn't have many of those, and having Jørgen as a friend... that would be good enough. Right?

Chapter Two

Frey was mixing dry food with liver paste for Kosmo when there was a knock on his door. Kosmo's ears perked up, but his eyes were firmly fixed on the bowl. Frey put the bowl on the floor and the little dog was all over it in a second.

Frey smiled at him then went to answer. His stomach knotted the closer to the door he got. He knew it was Jørgen on the other side. That it was time for their trip. He paused with his hand on the knob, then he took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Hi, Frey." Jørgen smiled at him and Frey's heart skipped a beat.

"Come in." Frey stepped back to allow Jørgen to come inside. "I'm just going to put on some more clothes, then I'm ready to leave." He hurried into his bedroom to put on the thick jumper he'd laid on his bed and an extra pair of wool socks.

He smiled nervously at Jørgen when he came back out. Jørgen seemed calm. He was leaning against the doorway of the outer door, looking around Frey's little flat with curiosity. Frey quickly wrapped his scarf around his neck and pulled a cap down over his ears. He pulled on his snowsuit and zipped it up, then bent down to lace up his boots. He grabbed his gloves next, then stood for a moment just looking at Jørgen.

"Ready?" Jørgen's eyes travelled down Frey's body, his friendly expression not changing. He nodded slightly, seeming to be satisfied with Frey's clothing.

"Yeah." Frey nodded to emphasise it.

"Where's your dog?" Jørgen asked, looking around again.

"Busy gobbling up his food," Frey said with a chuckle.

Jørgen's eyes moved back to Frey and there was something in them Frey couldn't decipher. But Jørgen just smiled and turned to open the door without a word, leaving Frey confused at the sudden emotion he had seen in his eyes.

Jørgen had driven his car over and Frey got into the passenger seat. They didn't talk much when Jørgen drove towards the horse centre; Jørgen was busy focusing on the road and Frey was busy looking out at the colourful houses they passed. He liked that the houses of Longyearbyen were painted in different bright colours. Looking at them instantly brightened his mood.

The horses were calm, steady animals. Jørgen seemed to be accustomed to horses as well as anything else here up in the arctic, but Frey felt a bit safer now, because he too knew his way around horses. Frey's mare, Skalm, dutifully did everything Frey asked of her and never once fought his control. Jørgen rode a gelding named Sleipnir.

"Are your friends into Norse mythology?" Frey asked, steering Skalm up to the side of Sleipnir as they rode towards Adventdalen, away from Longyearbyen.

"No, not really. Why?" Jørgen looked at him, puzzled.

"The horses have Norse names," Frey explained, shrugging his shoulders. "Sleipnir was Odin's eight-legged horse and Skalm was the first Icelandic horse known by name."

"I really don't know how they came up with the names. I never asked." Jørgen stared at him in surprise. "You interested in Norse mythology?"

"I-I guess." Frey felt uncomfortable being stared at like that and so he started stuttering again. "I've lived with it all my life. My parents are very interested in it. They both graduated with Norse as their majors and they gave their sons Norse names."

"If I remember correctly, Varg means 'wolf'? And Frey was a Norse god, if I'm not completely mistaken?" Jørgen looked to him for confirmation. "I can't say I remember much of Norse mythology from school." Jørgen grinned wryly.

Frey nodded. "Y-yeah, it's correct." The god Frey's real name was Freyr, but his parents had been kind enough to skip that last r. He couldn't imagine how much more crap he would've got in school if they'd given him the proper Norse name. Kids tended to be cruel, and Frey had experienced that more closely than most.

They continued up the sturdy landscape in silence. It was white all around them now, everything was covered in snow. Frey felt his nervousness ebb away slightly as he looked around at the beautiful landscape. He swayed slightly from side to side as the mare trudged on, and he relaxed his grip on the reins.

"Mind if I ask you a question?" Jørgen suddenly asked, breaking the silence.

Frey glanced at him curiously.

Jørgen looked back at him. "Why did you move up here?"

Frey looked down, his mind going blank. He fastened his eyes on the saddlebags that lay across Jørgen's gelding's back part. He did not know what was in them, he hadn't wanted to ask. The only thing he knew for certain was that Jørgen had brought a rifle, because it stuck out slightly. It made Frey uncomfortable, but he knew that it was a necessity. Everyone that moved outside the settlement had to bring a rifle and be able to use it. Frey did not know how to use it, but he hoped they wouldn't meet an angry polar bear.

"I-I wanted to move somewhere more desolate. Oslo is too much." It was part of his reason, but it was a very small part. So he wasn't exactly lying, he was just leaving the other parts out. Still, his guilty conscience reared its head. Jørgen had been kind enough to go on this trip with him, to show him more of Svalbard.

"That's true. I never liked Oslo."

"Did you live there before you moved up here?" Frey asked.

"Yeah. I grew up in Oslo, but never liked the city much. And after Karina's accident... She wanted to get away, Sara suggested Svalbard and I went with them."

Frey blinked in surprise. "Accident?"

Jørgen's smile was sad this time and he looked down, seemingly lost in thoughts. "Karina was a jockey, she lived for it. But on Derby Day that year... it was horrible to watch how the horse fell, how she landed underneath it. The ambulance came quickly and they shipped her away to the hospital. Sara was in shock, I had to take care of her. And the horse, it had to be put down immediately. It was too injured, it couldn't heal from it. It broke Karina's heart, she loved that horse, but she had her own recovery to focus on. She could never go back to being a jockey, but she still wanted to work with horses, so we moved up here. Sara actually grew up here, her parents owned the stable and they sold everything to the both of them. Horses are Karina's passion."

Frey felt his chest squeeze at the story Jørgen had told. He had only met Karina briefly, didn't know her at all, but he felt truly sorry for her. It was clear in Jørgen's face and voice just how much he loved his best friend.

"Life's good here though," Jørgen continued. "I don't think any of us will ever move away."

Frey looked out over the snow-covered landscape ahead of them, at the white mountains and glaciers. "I won't either," he mumbled.

Jørgen smiled. "There's no place on earth like Svalbard."

Frey couldn't agree more. The calm, steady pace of a small town in the middle of this snow and ice covered wasteland had been his safe shore. He didn't ever want to move away from this.

*~*~*

Jørgen drove Frey home late that evening and walked him all the way up to his door. Frey hurriedly unlocked it, then to Jørgen's surprise, motioned for Jørgen to follow him inside.

"I had a really nice time with you today," Frey told Jørgen in a low voice, glancing shyly up at him as he took off his gloves and cap.

Jørgen smiled widely. He was glad Frey thought so, because Jørgen certainly did. They'd spent the whole day up on the snow and ice-covered tundra. They'd seen glaciers and craggy mountains, reindeer and polar foxes, as well as several different species of arctic birds. The only thing they hadn't seen was a polar bear, but Jørgen hoped they would be able to see one another time. That Frey would spend more time with him.

His nervousness had slowly subsided during the day and in the end he had looked rather comfortable. Even when they'd sat down to eat a midday meal, which Jørgen had had packed down in his saddlebags. They'd talked loosely all day, and Frey had even laughed a few times. Jørgen had been completely mesmerised by his smile and his laugh, and he was only falling harder for Frey.

"Me too," he replied softly. "I hope we can do it again."

Frey blinked rapidly and Jørgen felt like a weight had been dropped into his stomach. But then Frey smiled slightly. "Yeah, I hope so to."

Jørgen felt happiness bubble up inside him as the weight disappeared. "Svalbard has so much to offer. Today was nothing compared to what is left."

"I can't wait to see more of this island."

Jørgen gazed at him, deciding to get something settled right there and then. "Two years ago I worked as a guide during the light winter and spring months. There was a really neat route that shows a lot of what's out there. Barentsburg, the Russian settlement, for one. It's a beautiful trip—one that simply has to be experienced. I'd really like to show you all that." Jørgen hoped he wasn't being too forward.

Frey's eyes were slightly wider than normal when he looked up at Jørgen. "How much will it cost?"

"Not much." Jørgen grinned. "But you don't have to worry about that. It will all be on me."