Middle Ground (3 page)

“I don’t want to fight, either.” She took a deep breath, then a smile lifted the corners of her mouth. “Good to see you, Will.”

Slumping back in his chair, he let his guard down a notch. “How’ve you been? You look good.”  Her dark blonde hair was shorter than it was four years ago and she had an air of self-confidence that she’d lacked before. There was no denying she was a beautiful woman and a good one, too. But she hadn’t been the problem. Will had.

Her shoulders relaxed and she looked him over and smiled. “Thanks, you do too.”

“I heard you’d moved to Kansas City.”

“I did, then I moved back. Got a job teaching at an elementary school on the other side of town.”

“No kidding. So you’re Ms. Hudson, huh? Or is it
Mrs.
now?”

 She laughed. “Still
Ms.
You’re a hard man to replace, Will Davenport.”

Will felt a stir of nostalgia and longing but refused to act on it. He’d hurt her enough. James’s announcement and his sister’s wedding were resurfacing his insecurities.

“So you out of the Marines or are you home on leave?”

“Still in. I’m here for my sister’s wedding.”

“Really? I’d heard Megan was getting married. What about you, Will? Any lucky woman in your life?”

He shook his head and studied the bottle in his hand. “Nope.”

She nudged his arm and laughed. “Maybe I’m a hard woman to replace.”

He looked up with a half-hearted smile. He wished that were true. He’d cared for Trisha but never loved her, no matter how much he wished he had.  Sometimes he worried that he’d end up like his parents, settling for a marriage with little love and affection. God knew he’d tried with Trish and  several women before her.

A sad look filled her eyes. “That’s okay. You don’t have to answer that.” She shrugged playfully. “Besides, who can compete with James?”

He smirked. “No kidding.”

“I heard you were in a unit together in Iraq. How’d you manage that?”

“Connections.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Your dad.”

There was no reason to deny it.

“How long are you home?”

“Only for the wedding. We leave on Monday.”

“That soon?”

He shrugged and took another drink. He was beginning to regret coming home. So far this entire trip sucked.

“Look…” Her hands rested on the table and she clasped them together. “I know we didn’t end well, which was mostly my fault. Sure, you couldn’t commit, but you never lied to me.” She shook her head. “Boy, do I appreciate that now after all the losers I’ve dated since. You always said you didn’t love me and I… I figured I could make you change your mind.”

“Trish…” Even though he’d told her to have her say, he really couldn’t handle listening to her litany of how he’d failed her. He’d beaten himself up over it, enough to last a lifetime and a half.

“No, it’s okay, Will.” The earnestness in her eyes told him that she spoke the truth. “I wanted something you weren’t capable of giving. Plus, I hated the long stretches of waiting for you to come home.”

He’d watched his mom sit at home, being a single mother for months at a time. He wasn’t sure he wanted to put someone through that. Especially if he loved her. But leaving the Marines wasn’t an option he considered until James’s bombshell. It was the job he’d spent his entire life training for. If he wasn’t a Marine, what would he do? But now that the door had cracked open, the option intrigued him.

Covering her hand with his, he whispered, “I’m sorry.”

She smiled. “No regrets.”

No regrets. It was a great philosophy, but a hard goal to live up to.

“So, have you got a date to the wedding?”

His eyebrows rose in surprise. “Are you offering or you setting me up?”

“Offering… as friends, of course.”

He hesitated. He was sorting through more emotional baggage than he expected this weekend.

She lifted her hands in surrender. “No drama. I promise.”

On a scale of one to ten of bad ideas, this was probably a nine, but he couldn’t stop himself. “How about you come to the reception? I’ll be tied up during the wedding since I’m a groomsman.”

She laughed. “Probably a good idea. I tend to cry at weddings and I promised drama-free. Where’s the reception?”

“The Holiday Inn. Eight o’clock.”

Her eyes searched his face. “I’ve missed you. Will.”

Had he missed her or the idea of having someone? It was hard to say. “When we were good together, we were great.”

Her face softened. “Yeah, we were, weren’t we?” She looked over her shoulder at her friends, whose undivided attention was on Will. Shaking her head, she laughed. “I have to go. I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

“Okay.”

She walked back to her table, looking over her shoulder at him.

Maybe his expectations were unrealistic. Maybe love came with time and respect. Was it fair to Trisha to test that idea out with her?

“Come dance with me.” Megan stood next to him, her hand extended.

“Hell, no. You know I don’t dance.”

“And we know that’s not true. In fact, I have actual video proving you do.”

His mouth dropped open before he closed it and narrowed his eyes. “You’re lying. If you had blackmail video, you would have used it long ago.”

She grabbed his hand and pulled. “Nope, turns out I have more patience than you thought I did. I’ve been saving it for a special occasion.”

“A special occasion? You mean like dancing in The Red Horse bar? On the night before your wedding? You think you’d save it for your wedding reception.”

“Oh, no, mister.” She tugged harder and he let her pull him to his feet. “That one’s a gimme. You
owe
me that dance.”

He’d give her anything she asked of him and she knew it. “How do you figure? Have you got more incriminating evidence for that particular piece of extortion?”

“Yeah, pictures of the time you dressed up like a girl. Come on.”

He followed her out to the dance floor. “I never dressed as a girl.”

“I have photos that prove otherwise. Shut up and dance, Wilhelm.”

He laughed. “You haven’t called me that in years. You must be desperate.”

“Desperate times call for desperate measures…”

The pop song stopped and Will grinned. “Looks like I got a reprieve.”

Her grip tightened. “You stay here and wait.”

A ballad filled the room. At least he didn’t have to make a fool of himself. “It’s my lucky day.”

Putting her hands on his shoulders, Megan laid her head against his chest. “Remember when Mom decided we needed to learn ballroom dancing?”

He hadn’t thought about that in years. “Yeah, and you got paired with that Russell kid and pitched a fit.”

She lifted her chin, pursing her lips. “He picked his nose! I wasn’t holding his hand!”

“Yeah, so they put you with me and I had to give up Shelia Murphy as my partner.”

“Waa. Waa. Life’s a bitch.”

“Dancing with your sixth-grade sister is the kiss of death to your social status when you’re an eighth-grade boy.”

“You seemed to recover with the
ladies
just fine.” She winked.

“You have me mistaken with James.”

“Oh yeah, it was weird that James wasn’t there. That was one of the few times I don’t remember him being with us.”

His entire life he’d been with his sister or James. Now he was losing them both. “We were like the Three Musketeers.”

Dreaminess softened her face. “We had some good times.”

“Yeah. We did.”

“I miss you, Will.”

A lump closed off his throat. “I miss you too, Meg. More than you know.”

A desperate look filled her eyes. “Don’t reenlist when your time’s up.”

His feet froze. Had James told her about his plans? “Megan, don’t…”

“I need you. Mom needs you. Don’t reenlist, and come home.”

He shook his head to clear his confusion. His two best friends bombarding him on the same night? But even if he did come home, his relationship with Megan wouldn’t be the same. “You’re marrying Dan tomorrow. You don’t need me anymore.”

“I’ll always need you, Will. Nothing can come between us.”

A chill ran up his spine. Something told him that wasn’t true. He shook it off and started dancing again. “Megan, don’t be silly. My entire life’s purpose was to be a Marine. You know that.”

“Will, you’ve proved yourself to Dad and if he doesn’t see it, he’s a fool. We both know that’s what this is.”

He pulled out of her grasp. “Is that what you think my life is? An attempt to get Dad’s approval?”

“Isn’t it?”

His stomach cramped. “I have to go.”

Fear widened her eyes. “Will, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it.”

“No, Megan. It’s exactly what you meant.” He turned to leave. The noise was getting to him and he’d had too many things thrown at him tonight.  He needed some quiet to sort out the mess in his head.

“Will, wait!” She grabbed his arm and pulled him to a stop. “Please.”

He hesitated, rubbing his free hand over his face.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. It just scares me when you’re over there. And I know you. You’re putting yourself in danger to protect everyone else before you protect yourself. Your new medal proves it.” Tears fell down her cheeks. “I couldn’t bear it if something happened to you and I have this fear…” She stopped and took his hand in hers, clutching tightly. “If you stay, something bad is going to happen to you, Will.
Please
.”

His breath stuck in his chest. His nightmares with fire had returned. Sometimes they were the dreams that had plagued his childhood, but now new ones were interspersed. Children screaming in the background. A boy shouting
Mommy!
But they were dreams. Nothing more, nothing less.  He couldn’t base his life decisions on dreams and Megan’s fears. “I’m careful, Meg. I promise. I don’t take unnecessary chances with my men’s lives.”

She moved closer, her eyes wild and desperate. “Of course, you wouldn’t. But who’s watching your back?”

“James.” But not for long.

Leaning her back against the wall, she closed her eyes. “There was a time I hated him. You and I were so close when we were little. And Mom, of course.
We
were the original Three Musketeers. And then he bolted into your life, larger than life. Who could compete with that?”

“Your fears were groundless. We included you in everything.”

“Only because you insisted.”

“I’ve always had your back.”

“Then let me have yours. I
know
something’s going to happen.
Please
.”