Microsoft Word - Blind_Space-Marie_Sexton.doc (6 page)

It wasn't hard to believe it of him. Although he was the son of one of the richest men in the quadrant, he resented the stipend his father forced him to live on. Never mind that it was still far more money than most men would see in a lifetime. Rikard squandered it. He gambled it away.

He always wanted more.

He was by the far the likeliest candidate.

The next question I had to ask myself was, did it

matter? I was captain of his guard, and therefore I followed his orders, but my oath was not to him. My oath was to the Regency.

51

Blind

Space

Marie

Sexton

It wasn't up to me how the Regency handled her

business. It also wasn't up to me how Rikard used his guard. If, after our release, I was convinced of his guilt, I could ask for a transfer. But whatever the prince may or may not have done, whatever the Regency herself may or may not have been guilty of, was moot. Only one thing mattered: I was a sworn officer of the Regency Militia.

That fact remained unchanged.

I had mixed feelings when Pierce came to tell me

his captain wanted to see me. On one hand, I'd found my resolve in his absence, and I feared he would find a way to make me question it again. On the other hand, I was bored of sitting in the medical bay doing absolutely nothing. It was horrifically tedious.

I assumed I would be taken to Valero's quarters

again. I was surprised to find him waiting for me just outside the door to the medical bay.

"I thought we might take a walk," he said.

It seemed odd, but who was I to argue?

"I must admit," he said, once we were alone in the lift, "I hadn't intended to see you again."

His words almost made me smile. "Then why are

we here?"

He laughed. "It seems my fascination with you

outweighs my anger."

52

Blind

Space

Marie

Sexton

The lift stopped and he led me out. I knew

immediately we were someplace I hadn't been before. First of all, there was carpet under my bare feet. Except for the fur rug in Valero's quarters, none of the ship I'd been to so far had carpet. The air was cooler than even the lift had been, and it smelled different. It wasn't the antiseptic and unwashed-man smell of the medical bay. It also wasn't the rubber-on-metal smell that seemed to permeate the

hallways of the ship. Instead, the air seemed…

Empty.

"Where are we?" I asked, and my voice almost seemed to echo, giving me the impression of a large room, like the hold, except without the smell of sheep shit.

"Once upon a time, it was an observation deck, but nobody comes up here anymore, unless we're in port." He took my arm and led me across the room. Twenty-eight paces, and then he stopped me, placing my bound hands on a metal rail in front of me. I felt up from there, and found smooth glass, icy-cold to the touch. I imagined the sheer, empty blackness of the blind space on the other side.

"I realize it's rather rude to bring a blind man to a room designed specifically for providing a view," he said,

"but I wanted us to be alone, and I thought you might be more comfortable if we weren't in my quarters."

I was still blind. I was still bound. But he was right.

53

Blind

Space

Marie

Sexton

Somehow, it felt less threatening being here than it did being alone with him in his cabin. Maybe it was simply knowing somebody
could
wander in at any time.

"I appreciate that," I said.

"I feel I should apologize for my behavior the other night," he said.

"Do you want me to tell you you're forgiven?"

"I take it I'm not?"

I wasn't sure what to say. I no longer resented his occupation as much as I had before, but I wasn't ready to admit it.

"I didn't know pirates longed for forgiveness?"

He laughed. "Neither did I. I suppose it's a touchy subject for me. There's a lot of discussion about what we steal, but very little mention of what was stolen from us."

"And you think two wrongs make a right?"

"I don't know about a
right
, but I'm not ashamed to admit I'd rather be here, living the way I do, than trying to scratch a living out of the mines back home."

I couldn't really blame him, but I opted to keep my mouth shut.

"What about you?" he asked. "Where are you from?"

"Delta-8."

"Really? I was expecting you to name some Empire

54

Blind

Space

Marie

Sexton

planet."

"It is."

He laughed. "Well, it is
now
, but it hasn't been for so very long. Your own annexation didn't go so well either, did it?"

I'd been thirteen when the Empire had annexed

Delta-8. No wars, like on his world, but there had been plenty of labor strikes and riots in the streets. People had died, although no one I knew. I had memories of it, yes, but I'd understood so little of what was going on. "It was a long time ago."

"That doesn't validate what was done."

"The Empire grows bigger every year. My father says only a fool fights progress."

"'If you can't beat 'em, join 'em'?"

"Something like that, I guess."

He laughed, and I felt him step closer. One of his

fingers trailed down my bicep. "And if you can't beat me?"

he asked. "Will you join me then, too?"

"I didn't realize we were in some kind of

competition."

"You have a point. In truth, I'm not competing
with
you, am I? It seems I'm competing with your Regency. And you're the prize." He slid his arm around my waist. His lips touched my jaw. His hair brushed my cheek. His cold,

55

Blind

Space

Marie

Sexton

clean scent tickled my nose. "What can I bribe you with, Captain Kelley? Isn't there anything you long for that your Regency can't provide?"

I kept myself perfectly still, not allowing myself to respond to his touch. "No."

"No luxury you crave? No addiction you can't

feed?"

"No," I said again.

"Your every need is met?" His tone was mocking. I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Close enough," I said.

"Every urge satisfied? Every indulgence you've ever dreamed of, granted?"

His hand on my back felt way too good. His kisses

unnerved me. "Yes," I made myself say.

"Is there no fantasy left I can make come true?"

No.
I wanted to say no. But there was. I found my mind drifting to the one thing I'd never shared with anybody before: the contents of the envelope hidden in my room. I thought of what lay inside, and I felt my whole body react. My pulse sped up, my breath seemed to catch in my throat. Inside my uniform pants, my cock began to grow hard.

"There is something!" he said with obvious relish.

He pulled away a bit, as if to see me better, although one

56

Blind

Space

Marie

Sexton

hand still rested on my bare side, and the other on my arm.

"Tell me what it is."

"Nothing," I said, but my voice came out all wrong.

"You're thinking of something," he said.

"Something that turns you on."

I wanted to say no, but the envelope's contents had spilled free in my mind, and I couldn't control the flush of arousal that followed. And the embarrassment. "It's nothing," I said again, and then, because it was such an obvious lie, I added, "I won't tell you."

"You're ashamed of it," he said, sounding surprised.

Of course I was. Any man would be.

I felt his body tense, and he let go of me, backing quickly away, so we were no longer touching.

"Does it involve children?" he asked, his voice suddenly serious. "Or slaves?"

"No!" I said, shocked. "Nothing like that!"

"Is it illegal?"

"No," I said. "It's not illegal. It's just…" I stumbled for what to say. "Embarrassing."

"Embarrassing?" He stepped closer again. His hand landed on my bare arm. His momentary reservations were gone. He was back to his suggestive, flirtatious tone. "And yet, it turns you on."

"Yes," I said, because I saw no point in lying.

57

Blind

Space

Marie

Sexton

"Some kind of fetish?"

I felt my cheeks turning red, but I said, "Yes."

His arm slid around my waist and his lips again

brushed my jaw. "Whatever it is," he said, "just name it, and it'll be yours. Say the word, and I'll give it to you. I want nothing more than to indulge you."

The thought of it made my pulse race, but I shook

my head. It was impossible. "You wouldn't understand," I told him. "You'd think I was…" What? A freak? A pervert?

I wasn't sure what I was going to say, but he didn't let me finish.

"Oh, Captain Kelley," he said as he kissed my neck.

"Anything that turns you on this much, I'm one hundred percent in favor of."

"No." I used my bound hands to push him gently away, and I was relieved when he let me go.

"You really won't tell me?"

"No."

He sighed, but it seemed more theatrical than

sincere. I had a feeling he was having great fun. He took my arm and turned me around, leading me back to the door.

"I can have Pierce bring you to my room for dinner tonight.

Will you join me?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"Of course."

58

Blind

Space

Marie

Sexton

"Do you intend to continue trying to seduce me?"

"I think I do," he said, and I could tell he was smiling. "Do you intend to continue saying no?"

"I do."

"Hmmm," he said. His hand moved teasingly up my bare spine. "I'm not sure if I'm disappointed or pleased."

I wasn't sure how I felt about it either.

59

Blind

Space

Marie

Sexton

The conversation with Valero left me feeling

unsettled. On one hand, I couldn't get the thought of him out of my head. His questions about my desires had

aroused me far too much, and although I had no intention of telling him the details of my fetish, I couldn't quite stop myself from thinking about it, either.

On the other hand, he was a pirate, and I was a

sworn officer of the Regency Militia. Prince Rikard was his prisoner. Whether Rikard had sold us out to the pirates didn't matter. My oath was to the Regency, and my duty was clear. I vowed that I would not let myself be distracted from that simple fact.

I was glad when Pierce finally came to get me.

Although it pained me to admit it, the truth was, I was tired of spending my time with the surly, bickering men who were supposed to be under my command. They were

petulant children, and I was tired of playing nanny. I was also growing weary of the smell. Although we had

showers, we had no way to wash the clothes we wore. The odor of sweat and sour ale was beginning to beat out the antiseptic smell of the medical bay. I was almost looking forward to Valero's room and the incense lingering there.

Pierce bound my wrists in front of me as he always

60

Blind

Space

Marie

Sexton

did. I followed him to Valero's room with a mixed sense of guilt and anticipation.

The meal was pleasant. I still didn't eat much. I still didn't drink the wine, but then again, I'd never been much of a drinker. The one sip I'd had at our last dinner together had been the first alcohol I'd had in months.

After the meal was over, I moved away from his

table and sat in one of the strange blobs that was actually a chair. It was soft and comfortable and a welcome change from the hard, straight-backed seats in the medical bay.

"Are you sure you won't have some wine?" Valero asked.

"Quite sure."

I heard him put something down on the small table

to my right. I felt his fingertip slide down my arm to my bound wrists, which rested in my lap. He pushed my knees apart and I felt pressure against the insides of my thighs.

His hands moved up from knees, toward my groin. He was on his knees in front of me. "I present you with the finest wines from our hold," he teased, "and yet you refuse to drink it. Why not have just one glass?"

"Are you trying to get me drunk? Hoping it will lower my inhibitions?"

He laughed. "As a matter of fact, I am. Would it be so difficult to indulge me?"

61

Blind

Space

Marie

Sexton

I didn't answer. I tried to concentrate on not

responding to his touch. It wasn't easy. His hands were resting on my hips, his thumbs straying way too close to my groin. I felt the pressure of his body on mine as he leaned forward. He kissed my collarbone. I did my best to think about Rikard, who was somewhere on the ship, held captive. I did my best to concentrate on my duty.

"I don't suppose this fetish of yours is food related, is it?" he asked.

"No," I said, shaking my head.

"Too bad." He kissed my collarbone on the other side. "Tell me what it is."

"No." Only one word, but my voice shook. His tongue teased the hollow of my throat.

"Fine," he said. He began to tease my left nipple with his fingers. It felt far better than it should have, and I bit my lip, hard. I did my best to concentrate on that self-induced pain rather than his touch. "Just think about it then," he said. "Whatever it is, I want you to think about it."

"No," I said again, but it was a feeble protest.

"Is it so terrible to indulge yourself?"

Was it? Gods, it had to be. No matter how tempting